Our Secret Melody

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Lyric: Fifty-Two

MelRose POV:

“Wait! It’s me! Ouch...ow...you...hit hard...”

I heard the person let out a painful grunt before letting me go!

Hurrying in getting myself away, I was about ready to scream for help! Though my fear instantly turned into anger once I saw that it was Zack! I was so startled by his actions earlier that I just thought of fighting back. Like honestly, what the hell is wrong with him!?

“Are you serious right now?! Do you have any idea how much you frighten me-”

“Shh! They’ll hear you...”

Zack quickly hushed me in a calming motion before peeking on the other side of the building.

Giving out an annoying pout, I too ended up peeking over like he did and saw that there weren’t really many guards on duty tonight. But I don’t see how Zack expected me to go to his dorm when it’s clearly impossible. It’s too risky getting caught and I’m not ready to get fired-

“Okay, when I give the signal. I want you to run as fast as you can...but for now, just wait here.”

Zack quickly explained very vaguely before walking away from me!

“Wait! What?...what are you doing...hey!”

I tried my best to whisper as quietly as I could. But I just sounded stupid trying to yell out to him this way...

Giving off an annoying sigh, I patiently waited and watched very carefully how Zack approached the two guards. I wasn’t able to make out what he was telling them, but judging by his dramatic hand gestures. I watched as both guards hurried towards the direction where Zack was pointing at! Staring in confusion, Zack hurried in waving his hands toward me which I could only assume was the ‘signal’ for me to run?

“Come on! Hurry!”

He said to me as I tried to hurry as quickly as I could!

Grabbing my arm, he led me into the building and rushed us into the elevator! Feeling breathless, Zack lets go of his grip before pressing his dorm number. With the elevator moving, I rested my head back against the wall before picking up on Zack’s sudden laughter.

“What’s so funny?”

I asked him while he pushed his light brown hair back. He then turned to look at me and gave me the biggest grin before speaking.

“You looked like a hedgehog running with those tiny legs of yours- ouch! Why do you keep hitting me.”

He grunted in discomfort before rubbing his arm where I smacked him.

“The first time I hit you was because you scared me! And now I’m hitting you again because you’re making fun of my shortness-”

“Okay! Okay! I’m sorry...I didn’t mean to scare you. I just thought I could try out those cool action scenes you see in dramas. Where the main protagonist is suddenly kidnapped by the antagonist-”

“You clearly watch too many dramas...look, I’m not sure if you know this. But doing that to regular citizens would be illegal, not to mention assault. Which by the way, what did you tell those guards outside that made them leave?”

I asked him once we both heard the elevator come to a stop. With the doors opening, I followed Zack behind and admired how beautiful his dorm was! He had a lot of beautiful art hanging on his walls and I could see a set of what looked like a collection of action figures displayed by his drawers.

“Oh, I just told them that a suspicious person was lurking right outside the companies property. Anyways, do you want to eat something? I have leftover lasagna I made yesterday-”

“You can cook!? Wow, I’m surprised, and here I thought you were only good at dancing and singing.” I jokingly said as I took a seat near the island...

“I mean, I’m no chef. But my sister taught me a thing or two on how to cook. With our parents always working, I had my sister cook my meals for a while. So I ended up having her teach me...I wasn’t able to eat any of the lasagnas I made yesterday. Because when my sister called me last night, I ended up sneaking out of the dorms so I could get home...in fact, I didn’t really get any sleep last night. Since all my sister did was cry until morning...I’m sorry. I don’t know why I’m telling you this, forget I said anything...”

His once serious demeanor was so quick to change into his jolly self as he began to warm up a plate for me. Though what he said made me lose my appetite a bit, guilt was beginning to slowly creep up from behind me and I just needed to get something off my chest.

“Zack...I know you told me to not speak to your sister if had anything to do with Kai. But may I ask why?”

I asked in curiosity as Zack took a seat next to me as he handed me the plate of food.

“Because...I want my sister to move on. To forget about the past...and to just focus on what she loves. And that’s acting...if you were to talk to her about Kai. I worry for her wounds to reopen...and I just don’t want that. So for my sister’s sake...I don’t think you should talk to her at all-”

“I just feel like I need to apologize...Lily asked me to be her friend. But it’s like I’m betraying her by what I’m doing being with Kai.”

I explained with heavy sorrow as I looked down at my plate...

“My sister...she’s like me. We both trust people so easily without a second thought. And we both always have this bad habit of forgiving those who hurt us. So I can tell you right now, that my sister will never blame you or hate you for the feelings you have. Will she be hurt? Of course...but I know that her heart will heal. She’s always been so strong...so I know she’ll be okay. But right now...she’s like a delicate flower trying to not wither away. I think her leaving Korea might be good for her...perhaps, it’s what she needs. Melrose...if you and Kai continue to date, then I know that the entire world will one day find out. My sister included...so let things move in the pace they’re supposed to.”

Zack explained in a gentle grin, turning his eyes sights on me. He teasingly poked my cheek and I tried my best to smile as he began to devour his food.

I took what he said in mind as I started to eat the lasagna. It was delicious and brought my body at ease. Food will always be a cure whenever I’m feeling uneasy. Though what Zack had to explain to me really opened my eyes, to see things from my perspective. It’s like I’m doing things too fast... trying to comfort Jin, being there for Kai. Having to lie to my sister and then telling her the truth about my actual job... and now I’m trying to talk to Lily and apologies to her. I can’t be too hasty with everything I do...so I will take Zack’s advice and let things be how they are.

“Okay...you’re right...you know...I kinda wish my relationship with my own sister was as strong as yours. The way you speak about Lily, I can tell you both get along very well-”

“Eww, no way. I mean...yeah we both have the same traits. But no way in hell do we get along with each other... listen. I love my sister to death, that much is obvious. But she could be such a bitch sometimes, she’s stubborn, a know it all and always does whatever she wants. Don’t even get me started when we were both little, you would think since she’s oldest she would be the most mature. But in reality, it was me that had to take care of her sometimes- hey?! What’s so funny?!”

Unable to hold on to my laughter, I burst out in tears as I giggled uncontrollably. For a second, I truly believed that Zack and Lily had an amazing bond. But oh, how wrong I was. I guess he’s no different from me when it comes to fighting with your sibling. I then watched as Zack got up and grabbed my empty plate along with his and placed them in the sink. Though his annoyed expression was visible enough to keep me laughing!

“It doesn’t take much to make you laugh, does it? You know...I kinda wish I could laugh at my childhood like most people. But whenever Lily and I get asked to talk about our past...how we were as kids. We try to avoid answering it... because a majority of the time it was always dance lessons, piano practices or even trying to improve on our studies. It was always work after work...so whenever we did get free time to play, Lily and I would run off to this abandon park area. The reason why we would go there all the time was that there would be no kids. We would have the whole playground to ourselves... the only issue was that it was left unconstructed, not everything was stable...”

He paused what he was saying before walking towards the living. Sitting himself down, he looked out the window before going into deeper detail about his childhood.

It’s hard to believe that Zack had to do so much when he was little. Though I’m mostly surprised by how honest and open he’s being with sharing his past life with me. But I’m glad because I really want to get to know these members that hold such a powerful title. ExEx Idol, 3 men...that are seen to be perfect in everyone’s eyes. Little does everyone know the darkness that is set behind each member's heart...I thought that maybe Zack, who is still so young. Didn’t have any scars that would make him bleed like Jin and Kai. But how wrong I was...

“Not many people know about my condition...claustrophobia. Manager Sang has made sure to keep this away from the media and the public as well. Tunnels...small public bathrooms or even being stuck inside a room for days on end sets me off to have a near-on heart attack. It took 12 years to get used to being in an elevator. But if feel like it’s taking too long, I start to get very dizzy and just want to vomit. This is why I have my dorm be on the 1st floor...less time in the elevator for me to deal with. I was only 6 years old when it all happened...I still remember it to this day. When Lily and I were playing at the stupid park...we both decide to play hide and seek. And my dumbass thought it would be a good idea to hide underneath a ditch that had several metal planks stacked on top of it. I thought it was a cool hiding spot since Lily would never find me...but one day, when I tried to get myself out of that ditch. I ended up bumping into the rusty chains that were supposed to support the metal planks from falling on top of me. But... before I knew it...all I heard was a loud crash and everything around me going black...I honestly believed that I died for a second. Because I felt so heavy and cold... and I knew what darkness felt like. I wasn’t even sure if anyone could hear my cries...I have completely buried myself beanthe metal. The ditch that I was in was what saved me from getting crushed. But at the time I kinda wish it did... because I felt like I couldn’t breathe. Unable to move...the fears that were suffocating and the anxiety attack I never knew I would go through...for 22 hours...I was stuck in that hell hole. From what my father told me when I was much older to understand. The reason why it took so long to get me out of there, was because they feared that if they rushed in removing the planks too quickly. They were afraid that one slip-up would cause everything to collapse more further in. Which would have killed me instantly...I try not to remember too much about it. But whenever I’m feeling trapped or stuck in discomfort...I immediately get flashbacks. Though I keep telling myself...that I won’t let fear overrun me...I want to face it, so I could get stronger...”

His voice sounded broken and I’m certain that he was unable to see how much his hands were shaking! Slowly approaching him, I took a seat by his side and gently placed my hand on top of his. My gesture seemed to have brought him back to his senses that he forced a smile. It’s amazing how Zack could be so cheerful and full of happiness after going through something so traumatic.

“Sorry... I’m fine. Umm...new subject, uhh...the reason why I wanted you to come here today was so- Melrose?! What are you doing?” He asked acting surprised by my actions as he grew flustered!

“Whenever...I see someone who’s in pain. I can’t help but want to hug them...and tell them that everything will be okay. Zack...you’re amazing...most people who are claustrophobic could never face their fears. But you...you don’t let that get in your way, because your heart matches who you are. Strong...” I explained to him once I decided to remove my arms from him. Though Zack’s face was as red as a tomato that I casually let out a playful smirk.

“You! Don’t just hug a guy so easily, they’ll start getting the wrong idea. And...don’t let Kai know you hugged me. Knowing how he gets...I don’t wanna put up with his stupid jealously. Just...wait here for a second...”

Zack said to me as he was too shy to look my way before excusing himself.

As I waited, my eyes wandered around the room until I saw a picture frame near the table next to me. Picking it up, my eyes widened in shock at the 4 people standing together in a group. It was Kai, Lily, Zack, and Jin. They looked so young in this photo... perhaps this was when they were about to debut? Giving off a little grin, I placed it back on the table. These 4 are like family...I just hope...they all keep supporting one another. And that I don’t get in the way of their dreams-

“Alright...I’m back. Sorry, I just had to take my contacts off. They were starting to tire out my eyes and- what?”

He looked at me in confusion as I watched him adjust his glasses. But the smirk I was giving, was too obvious for him not to notice...

“Just when I thought you couldn’t look anymore younger from the rest of the members, you go ahead and put your glasses on that only make your baby face look more noticeable-”

“Shut up! I’m not a baby, I’m a man! I can grow a mustache if I wanted to...it just takes a few months for it to grow out...”

He shouted at me feeling offended. Giving off a pout he pulled out his laptop that was laying on the other side of the couch and began to look something up on the internet...

“What are you doing?”

I asked him as I looked at the clock behind us. It was still a little early but I actually didn’t think about how I would get home. Isn’t the only exit right through the entrance where Zack and I came from? If so, then how am I going to get past through the guards?

“Melrose...when I asked you if you could love someone who almost killed you. What did you think I meant by that?” He asked as I brought my attention back to his serious tone.

“Uhh... I’m not really sure. I just took it how I heard it. Which...I asked you earlier today why you asked me something that-”

“Before I go into detail...I want you to take look at this article.” He said while placing his laptop on my lap.

As I started to read it, I was horrid by what this person did! Even as I scrolled further, I saw images of the vehicles that were involved in the car crash! It makes me sick to my stomach to know that there are really sick fuckers out there that would go through this extreme of trying to kill someone! But, why is Zack having me read this? Closing his laptop, he placed it on the table before taking a moment to take a deep breath in. His actions were making me a little nervous as I waited for him to say something...

“Lily...she’s not afraid of telling people what happened to her. I’m sure she told you that she was involved in a car accident a few years back. Well, the images of what you saw...she was in that collision. The driver and her agent were instantly killed in the crash. But Lily...she survived...but at the cost of her legs being permanently fractured. The doctors were even thinking of just amputating them off. But I knew if my parents let that happen...then Lily really would have wished that she died... acting...that’s her pride...her passion. Take that away and she’ll have nothing. six hours is what it took to fix as much as they can...and let me tell you...those six hours were hell for me and my family. I was beginning to worry that I would be an only child...I wasn’t ready to say goodbye to my sister. Especially...Kai, I thought that I was taking it hard...but Kai...he just lost it. I never in my entire life...seen someone break down to the point that they looked like a corpse with no soul in them...”

As he took another breath in, he laid himself on the couch as he looked at the ceiling. I was left speechless and didn’t know what to say, my chest hurt and my throat felt restricted as I felt my entire body shaking to the core...

“At first, we thought it was just an accident. But when the cops investigate the other female driver that caused the crash. My mind was blown away by what they discovered. After arresting the woman, they sentenced her to life in prison for 1st-degree murder. Because everything she did, was planned. They tracked where this woman lived and found what had to be the most distributing thing I could ever imagine. Every room in that bitches house was filled with images of Kai. From paintings, postcards, body pillows, stickers, calendars, shirts, bedsheets, phone cases...but that wasn’t what terrified me the most. What really scared me...was what they found on her computer. There were videos of her harming herself, masturbating to Kai’s picture, and just weird video clips of her singing our songs. They even found this website that she would use every day, from what the police were able to pull from the records that were in the server. It was a fan site where people could share fan art, song covers, and just share their favorite fandom of groups they like. The most popular one that was favored, was ExEx Idol. But it was also a place where people could share pictures of us and spread rumors. And unfortunately, one day...I guess someone took a picture of me, Kai, and Lily sitting together in a restaurant. Though what they did was crop me out of the frame and made people believe that Kai and Lily were on a date. The rumors spread like wildfire for weeks, Lily no longer felt comfortable staying in Korea. So she decided to stay in France for a while...and on the day when she was leaving. Jin, me and Kai went with her to the airport so we could say goodbye. But we were careless... because when Lily was hugging us goodbye. We had no clue that the media had followed us... paparazzi took secret pictures. But they chose to only fucking post the photo of Kai and Lily embracing each other! I honestly wanted to murder whoever took that photo... because once that was posted online. The rumors only got worse, that my sister and Kai were married and they planned on moving to France soon. It was ridiculous and I thought that there was no way in hell that anyone would believe something so foolish. But I failed to take it seriously, because not even after a week of that photo going viral. That’s when the crash happened...and Kai blamed himself every day. Even now, he continues to blame himself. Because it was a toxic fan of his that tried to kill the women he once loved. And what made it worse was that he wasn’t allowed to fly to France because Sang feared another scandal breaking out. It was bad enough that these rumors were circulating...so it was decided to keep Kai at the dorms...” After he was done talking, I watched him close his tired eyes.

Gripping the ends of my shirt, I tried my best in holding in my tears. I won’t cry... because then I’ll be breaking down to something painful that Kai wishes to move on from. But how can he forget such a thing!? My heart is practically breaking for the both of them... something so tragic is what shattered the love they both once had for each other. I thought that I could be able to handle any pain that Kai needed to share with me. But I now realize just how severe the scars on his heart really are. If watching his own mother die wasn’t enough...I could only imagine what he was going through after what happened with Lily. Rushing myself to stand up, Zack stayed completely still as he kept laying on the couch...

“Why...tell me all of this-”

“Because you need to hear it...and face the reality of how cruel the world can be. Kai... I’m not sure if he would have told you everything. Which is why I’m telling you...it was my sister who was in pain...but...the one who truly suffered, in the end, was Kai, for what he almost did. MelRose, sometimes there are some things better left unsaid. But the truth will one day come out, Jin and I won’t ever speak of it. Because the one who should say anything...is Kai himself. But for now...like I said earlier. Let things go at the pace they are at...don’t force it. Melrose, I didn’t tell you all of this so you could be sad. I told you all of this so you could get a better understanding of our past...and because...” He went silent as he was unsure of what to say next.

“Because what?”

I asked him feeling the sorrow of my heart beating quickly.

“Because I see you as a little sister-”

“What?! You’re so dumb, it’s the other way around! You’re supposed to see me as the older sister-”

“I already have an older sister, and I don’t want another one. Anyways, it’s past my bedtime so that means you have to leave.”

He suddenly said to me as he stood up and began to push me towards the elevator!

“Huh?! Wait! How am I suppose to get past the guards-”

“Guards? Oh! Just sleep at Kai’s dorm, he’s your boyfriend now so I doubt he’ll have any issues with you sleeping over. I mean you already stayed the night at his house and judging by those kiss marks around your neck I’m sure you won’t have a problem-ouch! Stop hitting me already!”

He suddenly cried out in pain as he had the elevator door open.

“Then stop saying stupid things!”

I said to him once he gave me one last push inside. He then scanned his key card at the sensor and pressed Kai’s dorm number!

“I can’t just sleep at his dorm without telling him-”

“Sure you can! Besides...you no longer look gloomy from what I said earlier. So smile...and be happy that you were able to save Kai from his sadness. Which by the way...if you can. Keep what I told you on the down-low. Goodnight, Melrose...know that you can always rely on your older brother for advice.”

He said with a cocky smile while pointing at himself. With the doors coming to a close, I wasn’t sure what to feel. I was told so many things today that I felt like it drained the life out of me. My emotions are shifting back and forth and with how cheerful Zack was acting a few seconds ago. I know that was just his way of trying to cheer me up...

“As if I’ll see you as an older brother...”

I said in annoying laughter as I smiled. Zack, thank you for opening up to me...

Hearing the elevator doors opening, I let out an embarrassing sigh as I rubbed the back of my neck. If Zack was able to see my hickey, does that mean other people saw them!? I hope not-

“Melrose!? What are you doing here? How did you get past the guards from below?”

Taking that one step inside Kai’s dorm, I was welcomed by Jin’s voice! Confused as to why he was here, I heard the footsteps of someone coming from down the hallway. It was Kai! And he looked just surprised as I was, just what is going on? Shouldn’t Jin be with his mother? The last time these two were in the same room together they were fighting! So what’s going on?

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