Our Secret Melody

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Lyric: Seventy

MelRose POV:

Seeing him in the flesh, I automatically froze. So many questions were running through my mind as to why he was here!? I didn’t want to see him, not like this! The situation that I’m in right now, coming out of Jin’s apartment. It doesn’t look good at all, even if I were to explain what was going on. Knowing how Kai is-

“Kai, wait out here for a moment.”

Jin suddenly said in a calming tone. Turning himself around, he kindly pushed me back into the apartment before shutting the door behind us! Though we were both able to pick up Kai’s anger once he began banging on the door!

“Jin! Open the fucking door! What the fuck is Rose doing here!? Why is she in your apartment- Rose!? I know you can hear me! Open the goddamn door! I’m not leaving until-”

“What do I do? I...I can’t...I don’t wanna talk to him right now. Why is he here? Did you-”

“He came here on his own...I was trying to get him to leave. But... you’ve already opened the door. MelRose, I understand why you don’t wanna talk with him. But you and I know that he’s not gonna leave until he speaks to you.”

Jin explained as he tried to calm my nerves, with both of his hands resting on my shoulders. I tried to block Kai’s anger as he continued to bang on the door repeatedly!

“Listen to me... starting tomorrow, I will have to go back to work along with Zack and Kai and I was going to ask you if you wanted to stay here for a little while longer. You’ve been helping me so much in these past days. It’s made me feel a lot better...and I’m able to heal because of it. However, I know that it could no longer be possible or easy for you to be here now because of him. But for his sake...and for yours, you need to tell him the truth-”

“No! I can’t...I can’t do that. If I do...it will make things worse. You already know what he might do if I told him the reasoning for me leaving. It will make things difficult for you and Zack, I don’t want Kai to ruin himself or ExEx Idol. I don’t want that, I don’t want to be the reason if this group broke up... I’m not worth it.”

I began to sob in heartache as I covered both my eyes...

Very quickly, Jin embraced me in his arms. I’m glad that I was able to ease Jin’s pain. But listening to how broken Kai is right now, it’s hurting me. And I know it’s not fair, I shouldn’t try and leave without saying anything. If I’m going to end things between us, then I need to tell him. Even if my words are lies, I have to break up with him... I’ll make him hate me. That way it won’t hurt him too much...

“You’re worth more than you know...I just want you to pick the right decision that won’t leave you with any regrets...”

He said to me before parting ways. Feeling him pat my head, he gave me a light warming smile before pulling out his phone...

With Kai’s rage still echoing through the apartment, I nervously grabbed hold of the key necklace I wore. His voice only seemed to wound me as I grew more anxious. It’s like I really have the worst type of luck when it comes to being with Kai. So as I wiped away my tears, I noticed that Jin was showing me something on his phone...

“What is that-”

“I bought you a plane ticket for tomorrow morning...I’ll meet you at the airport to see you off-”

“Wait! Why would you-”

“Because I know you, Melrose, you wouldn’t want to be here. Now that Kai knows that you’re here. It won’t be easy for you... besides, I think I’ve kept you for myself long enough. You should go home...where your family is, but before I head back to my dorm. Please... promise me that you’ll at least talk to him...”

Jin pleaded with me as he shoved his phone back in his pocket...

“Okay...I will, as long as you promise to get better. Because if I have to come back here to baby you again. Then I won’t be so nice next time...”

I responded in a bittersweet smile, though just as I finished saying those words. Jin rushed himself into embracing me one last time, his grip was firm as I felt how tensed his body was. Slowly wrapping my arms around him in return it didn’t last long as we both flinched to the sudden jump scare that Kai was doing towards the door!

“Honestly...he has no patience. I better answer it before he kicks my door down.”

Jin sighed with aggravation as he approached the door. Though before he opened it, he looked back at me and with a tender smile.

Smiling back, I took in a heavy breath as I tried to ignore this anxiety that was building up. I’ve had more than enough time to prepare for this moment. I know that I’ll be okay...I have to. For my sake, I need to be okay.... because if I’m not. Then I’ll always hate myself for it, I’ll end things quickly. I’ll have Kai leave after we’re done talking. That way we can go our separate ways... forever.

“I’ll kill you! Opened the fucking door, Jin-”

In an instant, Jin was so quick in opening the door. However, he quickly yanked Kai by the shirt and pulled him inside, throwing him to the floor! Jin’s once kind expression immediately changed into something stern. He looked almost too intimidating to approach...

“Before you throw your tantrums, I want you to think very carefully of whatever that stupid brain of yours is thinking. I’ve known you for so many years...so you should know damn well, that I would never do anything to the woman you love. And if you think Melrose is capable of doing something this deceitful...then you really don’t deserve her. I’ll be heading back to the dorms...so you two can take as long as you need in talking to one another.”

And just like that, Jin left without turning back. The slamming of the door made the floor vibrate a bit. Though it couldn’t feel any more awkward... clenching my fist. I kept my head looking down as I was too afraid to look at Kai directly. I’m sure he can’t bear to look at me either... he probably already hates me-

My thoughts were then interrupted by someone grabbing my hand! One tug was all it took in pulling me down to the floor! I then instantly felt a pair of familiar arms hugging my lower back. His embrace was strong, he buried himself between my breasts as I felt my entire body tremble in despair. No...I don’t want to remember his touch, I can’t... because if I do...

“Let me go! I don’t want you touching me-”

“I’ve missed you...so much. Rose...”

His shattered voice, his unsettled breathing. And the rapid growth of his heartbeat that I felt becoming too heavy for him to handle. This was what I didn’t want...I don’t want to see him in pain because of me. I’m the reason why he’s like this, I have to do it...I have to say the words! Even if kills me, leaving me numb. It’s better than having Kai suffer!

“I don’t want it...I don’t want your love. I can’t...I need to get away from you. It’s because of you...that I can’t be happy...this life of yours. I don’t wanna be a part of it, I don’t...wanna love you anymore. I hate it...your nothing...but a burden...so let me go!” I shouted out my words in anger as I felt his arms finally loosen a bit.

Pulling myself free, I sat on the floor across from him as I felt the warm tears escaping me. Clenching my jaw, I felt like throwing up as the pit of my stomach began to ache. Covering my mouth, I tried to keep my cries silent. No matter how painful this is, Kai...is the one person who I never wish to hurt. I’m sorry...Kai, I’m so sorry...

“Then say it...”

He bluntly voiced out, but he didn’t give me enough time to respond as I felt him eagerly place his hands against my cheeks and had me forcefully look him in the eye! He already knows me all too well, that I can’t lie...and if I do...I can never look them directly in their face! It’s not fair...

“I...I...”

Stuttering my words, I went completely mute as all I could do was cry.

“Fucking say it! Tell me how you hate me! Say how pathetic I am and how stupid I was for loving you! Say it! Say that everything we went through meant nothing! That I didn’t matter! Give me any of those reasons...but please...don’t tell me that...you love Jin...anything but that. Please...just tell me that you hate me...that alone...I could at least handle-”

“I can’t!”

I yelled at him before pushing him off! I then hurried in getting off the floor as I ran towards the door! I need to get out of here! If I stay any longer-

Suddenly the slamming of his big hands hitting against the door that I was about to open, caught me by surprise! But I still tried to turn the knob out of desperation! However, my strength was in no comparison to his muscles. So all I could do was was grip the doorknob tightly while placing my forehead against the door. My tense shoulders instantly began to shake the moment I felt Kai’s body leaning against mine!

“You really want to get away from me that badly? Do I really make you that sick? Am I that bad...that you couldn’t even tell me that you were leaving? Am I this broken, that you’ve come to hate me for it? Everyday...since you’ve been gone. It’s like I couldn’t breathe... everything was tasteless. And this world around me had lost its color...I thought that my music would be able to save me from this pain. But it only made it worse...I can’t sing if you’re not there to hear me. I can’t smile...if you’re not smiling back. And I can’t...I can’t love anything nor find the passion...to face my fans. If the woman that I come to love so much...is crying because of me. Rose... please, look at me...and tell me that everything will be okay...”

The feeling of his warmth consumed me as I slowly released the knob. With a bit of hesitation, I decided to turn myself around to finally face him...

There, I was able to see his light green eyes. The sadness in his expression as he placed his forehead against mine. I could see it all, the insecurity, the pain, the sorrow, and heartache that he’s been having to go through all this time. I’m certain that I broke his heart more, he told me to not tell him if I loved Jin. Of course, I don’t...not like that. Kai, would you really want me to hate you... instead of falling in love with someone else?

“You’re so cruel...”

I finally cried out in despair as I slowly began to wrap my small arms around his neck.

“And you’re a heartless woman...”

Kai whispered in grief as he leaned his lips towards mine.

What am I doing? I shouldn’t let him kiss me...I need to pull away. But why is my heart betraying me? Why do I choose to stay in his embrace? Why can’t my love be beautiful? Why must it hurt this much...Kai, is your heart in agony just like mine? If so, just for this moment... please make it stop. Hold me until there’s nothing left...

One kiss was all it took to make me cry as I engulfed myself further into him! Sure enough, Kai immediately hurried in pickings me up off the floor. Wrapping my legs around his waist, he walked us towards the couch as he placed us down against the soft cushion. Not once did we separate from our deep passionate kiss, our moans grew loud as I started to run my fingers through his long black hair. Though Kai wasted no time in unbuttoning my pants! So I decided to pull his shirt off as well as mine! It’s like we were both starving to feel our touch, the heated sensation of my breasts pressed against his pecks made my nipples instantly hardened!

Kai soon breaks away from our kiss as he started to aggressively pull my pants down along with my underwear! Though I didn’t let that stop me from bitting his neck, sucking on his bare flesh. I heard him groan in delightful pleasure, though I immediately let him go the moment he grabbed one of my breasts! Arching my head back, I welcomed his lips to devour my neck. Our heavy breathing grew more intense as my inner core grew desperate for pleasure!

The nibbling of his teeth biting my skin, made me melt in a heat of pain and lust mixing. I wanted more, more of his kiss, his touch, his love...I wanted to savor it all. The feeling of his lips began to make their way down towards my clavicle until he reached between my breasts. With his fingers beginning to play with one of my nipples, I felt the wave of tension building up the second I felt his other hand grabbing my inner thigh!

“Kai...”

I cried out his name so sensually as I ran my hands down towards his abs. Though I didn’t stop there as I finally grabbed hold of his long harden shaft that was still hidden beanthe his pants. He instantly grunted as he grabbed my jaw and had me look at his lovely eyes. Bringing our faces closer, he stuck his hot tongue into my mouth as I tasted his sweetness.

“Rose...let me always hold you like this...let me be the only one. My love...my Rose...” He muffled out his words once he pulled away from our hot kiss.

Grabbing both my arms, he pinned them over my head as I watched his every move. My body grew hotter the more his eyes violated my naked body. His words hit me deep within my heart as I felt the burning touch of his fingers finally circling my aching pussy! Biting my lower lip, my legs were wanting to clench. Though with Kai’s knee being placed between my legs, it was impossible to close them!

Though the wetness of my folds was beginning to vibrate the second he started to plunge his fingers into me! The sounds of my juices were overflowing as I drowned myself in the desires that I’ve longed for. But this feeling didn’t last much once the sounds of Kai’s belt could be heard being taken off! It’s like he was in a rush to feel me...to feel the love he’s been missing. I understand... because my body only ever seems complete when I’m this close with him.

“Kai... please...make the pain stop. Hold me...” I groaned out to him as I felt breathless.

Though he quickly responded to my plead, wrapping his arms behind my back. He pulled me into a tight embrace as I felt his hardened cock rubbing anxiously against my entrance! So I instantly wrapped my legs behind his back as I refused to let him go! I want him to be mine...and mine alone. I don’t ever want to picture him with anyone else...my first love. I want this forever...

“Always...I will always hold you...Rose...” Kai moaned out the moment our bodies began to connect.

With the feeling of his dick pushing its way through my inner wet walls, I gasped in heavenly pleasure. The stiffness of my body became loose with Kai starting to slam his erection into my womb. My body burned, the room grew hotter with each passing breath I released. My cries escalated and fell deeper into what this heart of mine truly wanted.

Gasping in every forceful thrust that Kai had to give to me, I welcomed it. I knew that he was being more forceful and aggressive with my body...but I was okay with it. Because he deserves to unleash his frustrations. I want to at least, make him feel good. Though the veins in his shaft were intensifying, causing my body to shiver and my throbbing core to spasm. Tightening my hold on him, the sweat of our bodies mixed along with our cum. My hips couldn’t stop moving as he kept the pace of thrusting himself into me. It felt so tight and warm with every penetration he carved in my cunt. I was no longer able to control my body fluids as I felt my body starting to clamp up...

“Kai...I’m-”

“Rose...more...give me more...”

Kai cried out in arousment once he felt my climax taking over!

With my pussy dripping in his cum, he refused to pull out as he kept himself close to me. He didn’t even let me catch my breath as he suddenly changed our position! Witch his cock still inside me, I squirmed with how sensitive I still was! But I felt almost too embarrassed to make eye contact with him with how he had me. As he sat normally on the couch, he placed me on top of him as he soon began to shove himself deeper inside me once more! With his hands gripping my waist, I bit my lower lip as I felt my lower abdomen being punctured by his long shaft piercing me!

“It’s too big...I... I’m already cumming...” I moaned out in ecstasy as I clawed my nails onto his back!

“You’re so tight...so wet...Rose, let me keep kissing you...”

He muttered in a heavy groan. Sealing my mouth, I decided to stick my tongue into his as I felt completely lost in his lust.

But it wasn’t enough, he needed more of me just how I needed more of him, I wasn’t even sure for how long we held each other. The ringing of both our phones would sometimes go off, but we couldn’t care less to answer as we were too busy drowning in our heat. It wasn’t until we both realized how dark it had gotten outside that we both finally dropped our bodies against one another. Feeling his embrace, I was too tired to even keep my eyes open. Though despite that, Kai continued to leave light kisses all over my face, he then placed one last final kiss on my lips before pulling me closer towards his chest.

“I love you...I love you...more than anything in this world. Please...don’t leave me again...Rose... please...”

His words grew faint as well as his breathing...

He fell asleep so quickly, but then again...with how restless he’s been this past month. It’s no wonder he could finally sleep so easily...the comfort in being in his arms. It was nice, calming and I felt so safe when I’m with him like this. But it breaks me... because as much as I love him. It won’t change anything...I’m sorry...Kai. Forgive me...

*
Within that morning that came, I was as quiet as I can be as I changed into my clothes. The sun was still yet to rise and I hurried in grabbing all of my things, with Kai still sound asleep, I need to make sure I don’t wake him. Jin had already messaged me on which airport to meet him in. But just as I was ready to leave, I paused for a minute before deciding to head back to where Kai was at...

Taking off my key necklace, I held in my breath as I reached my hand out to unlock the heart necklace that Kai has been wearing this whole time I’ve known him. As much as I wish to stay here by his side, to keep holding him. That was no longer possible for me to do so...I won’t ever regret loving him. But I can’t bear seeing him wear this necklace if this is where I’m ending things...but why? Why can’t my hands stop shaking?! As I finally unlocked it, I began to slowly pull the chain away from his neck. But just as I was about to take back my necklace, Kai had instantly grabbed hold of my wrist!

“So is that it then? You still plan on leaving me... without saying a word-”

“I don’t have any other choice...I...can’t stay here with you-”

“Then why did you let me hold you all day yesterday? Why were crying whenever I kissed you? Even now...why do you look so broken? Rose...I’m begging you...don’t leave like this...don’t take my heart away. Say it...say that you still love me...”

He voiced out at me, he then placed his other hand against my cheek and had me look at him. The sorrow in his eyes was breaking my heart!

“I’m sorry...but I can’t!”

I cried out to him, tugging my arm back! I pulled away from him as I ran out the door!

“Rose!”

The way he yelled out my name only made me run faster! I didn’t want him chasing me, since he was still naked I knew I only had a few seconds until the elevator doors opened! But as soon as they did, I heard the sprinting of Kai’s feet running down the hall! So I immediately entered the elevator and pushed the lobby button! And within seconds of doing so, Kai was separated from me and doors finally closing!

Bawling uncontrollably, my heart ached as I held on to both necklaces. Even on the way to the airport, I couldn’t look behind me. Because if I did...and if I saw Kai, I would only want to return to his arms and apologize. After I was dropped off at the terminal, I met up with Jin at one of the private rooms that he had set up for me.

“MelRose, you came right in time. Your flight is about to be called- huh? MelRose? What’s wrong?”

Jin suddenly asked in concern the instant he saw me, I then immediately ran towards where he stood and wrapped my arms around him as I broke down. I feel like all I did this whole time being in Korea was cry!

“I couldn’t do it Jin! I couldn’t tell him the truth...I’m afraid... afraid of what he might do. I’m sorry...I...love him so much! But it’s killing me! I can’t breathe right when I’m the reason for his pain!”

I expressed my broken heart as all Jin could do was listen. He stayed holding me until my flight number was finally called...

“It’s okay Melrose, everything will be okay...you took care of me...so this time, let me take care of you. I promise...that I will make things better.”

He said before I felt a light peck being placed on the top of my head as he started walking me towards my flight.

“Jin...thank you, for always being there for me. I promise...to keep in touch with you this time. So don’t feel like your alone...okay.” I said to him in a smile as he wiped my wet tears away...

“Of course. Melrose, please...take care of yourself.”

He said as he held my hand and with one final squeeze, he released me...

“I will...Jin, take care of Zack and Kai for me...goodbye.”

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