My mood was sour. That was something even my inner snarky voice agreed to. How can that girl be so rude to me without even knowing who I was?
Oh yeah I am sure that is the reason we both agreed on having a problem with because we are incapable of focusing on what should be the focus right now.
Alright I admit that is not the primary reason but still it is one of the reasons.
Does it even matter?
Apparently it does because she is the same girl who had her arms wrapped around Charles like he was her own personally customised toy from Hamleys.
Uh huh who does she think she is?
I know right. I mean its no shock that someone like Charles who is so charming and cruelly urbane would like someone like Vanessa who looked really fanciable. The woman clearly had an enchanting appeal to her attributes and the way she had sauntered her entire being into Charles's arms was more outré than it should have been because he does not strike me as a guy who would have a girlfriend attached to his forearm but now I know that if he does then it would particularly be Vanessa. Its absurd really. Why am I thinking about a girl who is into Charles? For all I know she may be just an old acquaintance stopping by.
So called old acquaintance do not look at their compadre like they are about to have a feast. She was practically eye-raping Charles like he was her very very close chum. More like in-bed kind of chum.
Stop okay? The last thing I want right now is for some gory images in my mind of Charles enjoying it with Vanessa. I mean stop altogether. Its out of line because Charles is just a friend and I happen to be exactly that to him as well which means I should not get upset over a girl who may or maybe not be his romantic pursuit.
They why are you upset?
I do not know!
I got out of the elevator when I reached the ground floor and stopped letting out a very rude streak of curses under my breath when I realised I forgot my phone back at his place.
Forget it. I will just ask him to pass me across the window later. I am not going back right now.
What? No! You have to go back and take it right now.
So Not happening.
Please Stella! This way you can find out what are they upto!
First, I am curious about nothing. Especially not about Charles and Vanessa alright and second, that is tempting so do not use my curiosity against me!
But you said you are not curious right?
Fine. Maybe a little and seemingly that was enough to get me back in the elevator and up to the intended floor in my mind.
I was about to knock on the door but found it ajar already so instead I just pushed it back and walked in.
I was about to call out but stopped dead in my steps upon coming to witness the scene in front of me. All my senses churned into a sick motion. Vanessa's head covered most of it but my thought processor was quick enough to deduce their kissing stance. I am sure my wide eyes and appalled look was less than pleasant because he jumped back with a startled look on his face and recoiled himself away from Vanessa who turned around to look at me. She gave me an exasperated look.
"Seriously, who is she?" She looked down her long nose at me and for a second I really weighed her question given the situation I had just landed myself into.
Who am I anyways and why I just could not mind my business and not react to everything that Charles does? Even if that means him kissing some fancy girl.
Again why am I so bothered?
Seeing them kiss like that, it hurt and I do not want to feel like that, like Charles owes me something because he does not, especially not an explanation pertaining to his love life but somehow it does feel like that, exactly the way I do not want it to be. Is it because he has been taking care of me? Or because he saved me? Maybe because he took an effort to make me feel alright?
What is it?
"I uh-I forgot my phone here." I fumbled around the cushions to find the damned phone. I cursed under my breath when Vanessa's annoying heels tapped away impatiently behind me making me uncomfortable when I could not find the phone for heaven's sake!
"Can you even afford to have a phone because I would hate to throw you out of here for making up that story so that you can come here and slut your way around my man." Okay thats it. I turned around with my anger creeping its way in and decided to put Ms. Snobby heels in her place when Charles cut me off.
Slut? Out of many things I am, slut shocking as that may be for this ginger bimbo, is something I am not! She can have her man for all I care!
So she is indeed his girlfriend.
"Enough Vanessa! If you insult her once again so help me I will have you thrown out of here quicker than you can spell your name out!" I jumped at his loud and booming voice, my nervous system crashing down spectacularly in submission to the murderous expression on his face.
Don't be ridiculous. That is the least he can do besides you can not overlook the fact that he was sucking her face off just a few minutes ago.
I dismissed the uneasy feeling of seeing Charles kissing someone so that I could think a little more straight here.
"Its okay Charles. I am out of here anyways." I said without looking at him as tears pricked at the corner of my eyes. I am not a slut. I refuse to let that frivolous woman get to me.
"Stella wait!" I walked past him, disregarding his urges to stop me. My phone long forgotten. I willed my feet to move faster since running away would look kind of hideous in an already ugly situation.
I decided to take stairs instead so that I would not have to wait for elevator which would give him the perfect opportunity to catch a hold of me. I wanted to face him, I did but for some reason I just could not find it in me to even look at him.
Damn you Charles! Go away!
I skipped three stairs at a time praying for my safety side by side. Relief coursed through me when I stepped on the ground floor and without wasting a second more I dashed towards the front gate, getting out as fast as I can.
"Stella?! Stop dammit!"
I was about to take the back door from the underground parking lot of our wing when a hand snatched my wrist, pulling me back so that my back hit the wall making me wince. I looked up at Charles who was giving me a furious look.
Oh you have got to be kidding me.
How come he is the one who gets to be mad right now?
Again why do you want to be mad at him?
None of us said anything, our breaths coming out harder and louder than our thoughts. I was panting from trying to get away from him and he was equally short of breath from trying to chase after me.
"What?" I asked softly, my thoughts all over the place. Not sure why we were doing this.
"It was nothing, Stella. I swear it was not what it looked like." He said coming closer and I backed away if that was even possible considering the concrete wall behind me. I am always hitting dead ends with him and its not fair!
He scowled at my action and stopped.
I wanted to scoff at his typical explanation because even though it might make sense to anyone else but it did not make any sense to me. Him kissing her is not the problem but me reacting to it like this? That is the substantial issue. The colossal damage is potentially waving a red flag between us.
"Why are you handing out an explanation to me, Charles?" I chuckled airily as if making myself believe in the nothingness of the situation rather than him. However there was no nothingness here.
He gave me a weird look. His eyes were oozing with an emotion I could not put my fingers on. His behaviour was starting to scratch at my throat because trust me this would have been a lot easier if he had just stayed put with Vanessa and not come after me.
"Because I don't want you to get any ideas. There is nothing going on between me and Vanessa!" He exclaimed, running a hand through his hair in frustration, leaving them messy all over his head. His jacket was gone and the tie around his neck was loosely hanging with top buttons of his shirt undone. Even in a messy situation like this, he somehow managed to look worthy of sight.
"Then why did you kiss her?"
Damn it Stella! Can't you keep your trap shut?
I am debating the same thing, believe me.
He looked at me and sighed.
"I did not kiss her. She came onto me. I was about to push her back and even tell her to piss off when you came in and saw all of that." He explained with wide eyes, examining my face.
Can he hear my heart beating this loud?
He didn't want to kiss her.
She kissed him.
His eyes wandered away from my eyes and down to my lips and he licked his lips. His adam's apple bobbed prominently. What was that?
"Pfft. What does it matter to me?" I made a dismissing wave with my hands like no part of it was in anyway concerning to my thoughts.
Oh how we humans try to deceive none but ourselves. Its pathetic. Yet admitting to something often times is more embarrassing than one can imagine.
His expression shifted. Something dark flickered in his eyes. His pupil were dilated and his eyes were full of hunger and so what it seemed like. It was something really close to desire but their was still a speck of contemplation in them, holding him back.
Back from what?
Back from going all in.
"So if I kiss anyone, it would not matter to you?" He asked, his voice had dropped a few octaves and the low growl in the back of his throat sounded life threatening. The hair on the back of my neck stood up and I could feel goosebumps rising on my skin at a breakneck speed.
I weakly shook my head and he cocked his head to side, looking passively at me.
Dang, his expressions are hard to keep up with.
"Are you sure Stella?"
I nodded biting my lip. I did not want to say anything else.
He groaned throwing his head back and closed his eyes. He backed away a few steps, giving me a chance to breath properly again. He grumbled something under his breath which was hard to catch but judging by his distressed looks, he was definitely not okay.
Why was he being like this?
"Fuck it!" He grabbed my face out of blue pushing me back to the wall with his body. His face came down to align with mine as his lips found mine. In that moment, all the sanity flew away like a bird ready to migrate its way back to the la la land.
He groaned lowly as his tongue trespassed through my lips and into my mouth, finding its target. His lips moved with mine in a perfectly synchronised dance and I could not help but return the tantalising favour. All my nerves giggled with the shaky feeling his lips were initiating inside me. I did not know about the butterflies but the burning sensation, like my skin was on fire and my lips were flaming hot with his moves was a sure thing. He tasted sweet, in a way allowing me to admit that how much I have wanted this and how much I have been afraid to have it.
My hands moved up his arms, to his shoulders, all the way feeling every bit of his flexing muscles underneath. He caught my hands and pinned them to wall, positioning me right at his mercy. His lips were rough, and his want was evident in his feverish claim.
He pulled away an inch, his face so close that I was melting with the intensity of those orbs which stubbornly held my gaze. I wanted to look away because I knew how dangerous this was becoming but like a fool I did not, even against my better judgement.
"Tell me this does not matter to you, Stella?" He asked, his voice had a seductive gruffness to it and my insides churned in a good way. He brought his face closer, running his nose along with mine in a soft gesture. "Go on, deny it."
I could not. He knew that.
"Tell me this feels wrong and I will back the fuck off."
No it does not and I do not want you to go away.
What is happening to me?
This is not me. I don't do this. Where is my control? My restraint? This is not wrong but this isn't what I should be doing.
"Hm?" His eyes were closed.
"I have to go." His grip on me loosened and he stepped back. I could distinctly see the hurt in his now transparent eyes and it broke my heart.
"Answer me." He said sternly but I couldn't answer to the questions I never knew existed between us. I need to think. I need time.
"I-I have to go." I crawled away from him repeating my words because I did not have anything else to say. I don't know what is going on and I don't want to act stupidly and rush into something that both of us would regret later.
He looked away.
He did not answer. His eyes were stuck to the ground, his fists balled like he was leashing himself on an invisible chain of patience.
"I need time."
"For what?!" He snapped looking at me, his eyes raw with unshed emotions. I flinched and gulped to clear my shaky voice.
"To give you answers."
His expression softened a little and he reviewed my words.
"Midnight." He came towards me, his body merely inches away from mine. "You have until then."
And he walked away leaving me, cold with the aftershocks of our kissing scam.
Okay first kiss between Charles & Stella? Jdhdjdjdjjd Ikr! what do you think?
Fun fact : So as I said Vanessa was a very last minute addition to this book but a very important one. You will know that later in the story. Her character is majorly inspired by Cheryl Blossom from Riverdale. Lemme know what are your views about her.
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