I was bathing Sylvia when I heard a knock. It was not an option to leave Sylvia alone and even running tap prevented my voice to leave the bathroom. So I didn't reply.
“Do you need help?” Jennifer tried to talk to me but I choose to ignore her. “Do want to have breakfast?” Again I didn't reply to her, and she left us.
I found Sophia and Jennifer talking in the kitchen. I still remember what they all did. My chest was burning but my heart was aching. Hot coffee and their cheap thoughts for me.
Both the women stopped their conversation while I settle Sylvia on her chair. They tried a fail attempt to talk to me. I choose to ignore them, every time and started preparing formula for Sylvia.
“We never wanted to hurt you.” Jennifer caught my hand when I was formula.
“I never said you are here for his needs,” Sophia said. “You are here for something more. And Mark does not even know this.”
“What I don't know?” Mark entered the kitchen with a cup of coffee. He's in a hurry. The two buttons of his grey shirt dress is open.
“Many things.” Sophia rolled her eyes, and she put an apron to Sylvia.
They were talking about things that I don't understand as I am not the family. Actually, it was Sophia who was talking and Mark was listening. It was feeling of being an outsider for me.
I reached to Sylvia with the formula and tried to feed her, but she was decided not to eat. Like always left-right games.
How she's so chubby when she put so much drama just to eat?
Sophia tried to feed her the formula but the little girl refused to eat. Today, she's throwing too much drama. Even, Jennifer fail. Mark held her, but she became restless and struggled to get out of her father's arm. She pushed his face away when he tried to kiss her cheek. His stubble must be hurting her.
I couldn't see the little girl getting restless, so I pushed gently everyone out of my way to reach Sylvia. Even she tried to reach me but Mark didn't leave her. She was struggling hard and anyone could clearly say that she was about to cry.
“Ma.........ma,” she said. Mark stiffen. “Ma......” Again she said and tried to reach me but Mark tried to kiss her head. He looked proud of hearing his daughter's first word. Finally, poor baby broke into tear and wailed. “Ma........”
I tried to take Sylvia from her father's hand, but he didn't allow me. He looked angry. Now, his hazel eyes didn't look happy at his daughter's first word.
“My daughter said the first word of her life, and she called you mama. What are you feeding her?” He accused me.
“Formula.” I snapped and managed to take Sylvia from him. She looked like a red tomato now every structure of her face looks red including ears. I cooed her. “Mama is here.”
“You are not her mother.” He boomed and again, she cried louder.
“We can discuss it later, please. I don't want her to cry any more,” I begged.
No Matter how angry he was, yet he left. After all, he's a father. He would never want his daughter to suffer.
“He's not good at expressing his emotions,” Sophia said.
“Who's he?” I was confused.
“But he's good at expressing his lust.” I mocked her and left with Sylvia to her room. Jennifer brought the formula and tried to converse with me but then left us alone. I set her toys on the floor and played with her. All this time, I could feel someone's eye on us. There must be a camera in the room. Mark Rogers is a protective father. He will never leave his daughters unsupervised.
“My sister said her first word.” Savannah was standing on the frame of the door.
“Sylvia said, mama.” I was proud of Sylvia's achievement.
“She's Miss Rogers to you as well. And -you are not her mother.” She reminded me again. I nodded since I couldn't say anything. “Words.”
“Yes, Miss Rogers.”
“If you hurt her.....”
“Why would I hurt her?” I snapped at her.
“Because you are not her mother.” She screeched so loud that Sylvia got scared and crawled to me. She hid her face on my chest.
“You scared her.” I glared at the culprit and could hear people coming to the room.
“You are using her.” She pointed her fingers at me.
“Why would I use her?” I questioned her.
“Because you are not her mother.” She screeched so loud that Sylvia started crying holding me tight.
“I never got to hear my children's first word. I would never use her.” I held Sylvia tighter. “I love her.” I broke into tears.
Why it hard to convince everyone that I am not what they think of me?
I am tired of convincing people that I may be immature, but I am not a bad person. I sobbed with Sylvia. Even she's tired from people screaming.
“Savannah, we can discuss it later.” It was Mark. I was surprised to hear his voice at this hour. He's home.
He made everyone left the room and left me and Sylvia in the room. I cooed her and humped her song to the sleep. By the end of the evening, she was fighting with fever and couldn't sleep. She was so restless that it scared me to death. All I could think is, to go to Mark.