As much as I love that Roman came back for me, I was terrified to leave the states to be with him. I had never been to a foreign country before and Russia just seems like such an intimidating place to be my first adventure away from the norm. Looking back at my childhood, though, reminds me that I am capable of adapting to new surroundings, no matter how horrible they are.
Seeing Roman at my college graduation ignited a deeper love inside myself for him and I'll never forget how he showed up for me. Thinking about Hannah's parents and all the others reminded me of my own absent parental figures and my heart squeezed in my chest. I hadn't had a mother or father since I was seven-years-old. Those first seven years came and went from my memories because the years to follow were far worse than the earlier ones. Jumping from one foster home to the next until I settled in the last one I'd ever live in, made my stomach clench with anxiety. I'll never forget how they all treated me as if I were just another source of income from the government. There was not one ounce of love in any of their homes and I knew it played a huge role in my future choice of men. I mean, for crying out loud, I was sleeping with a married professor! What was I thinking?
Lying next to Roman in my small twin-sized bed, staring down at his sleeping face, made me realize that all the bad things that ever happened to me brought me to this exact moment in time. It was as if Roman was placed in my life when I needed him the most. And there was no way I was ever letting him go.
"What are you looking at, Malishka?" Roman inquired with a half-grin on his face while his eyes remained closed. The sneaky jerk wasn't sleeping at all, was he?
Still admiring the view, I laid my cheek upon his chest and listened for his heartbeat. It was the only sound that completely calmed my nerves when my thoughts tried to go awry.
"I was looking at the ketchup stain on your cheek," I lied as a smirk tugged at my lips.
His chuckle vibrated through his chest, masking the sound of his heartbeat as he sat up, pushing me from his chest. Roman loomed over me as he stared intently down into my eyes. His bright blue eyes danced as he looked over every inch of my face, landing on my lips.
"I was saving it for later," he joked, leaning down to rub his face over mine as if he were trying to rub the ketchup all over me.
Knowing that there wasn't actually any ketchup there, I let out a fit of giggles and enjoyed every moment of this man rubbing his face all over mine. I know it's a silly action, but I loved that he was being this playful with me. It was a night and day difference from the big bad Russian I've thought he was over these last six months. I'm just glad that he's here now and not completely MIA. I still have no idea what he's been up to for six months, but he mentioned something about being done with the mafia game. What did that mean? Was his father's nemesis done hunting him? Thoughts of their threats still possibly looming overhead made me nervous to return to Russia with him. My heart began to pound and I felt my smile die as my giggles slowly went silent.
Roman must have felt the change in me because he stopped rubbing his face on mine and leaned back to stare into my eyes. His own smile had disappeared while he brought his hand up and cupped my chin, running his thumb over my bottom lip.
"What is it, Malishka?" Roman rasped.
Taking a deep breath, I pondered on what to say to him. Could I tell him what my fears were? Would he understand them? He's the son of a huge Russian mafia boss, danger was his life.
"Tell me, Julia," he urged and I knew that him calling me by my first name instead of his pet name meant he wasn't playing around anymore.
"I'm just thinking about the threat that caused you to run to the states under a false name. You say that you're out of the mafia game, but are you truly ever out of a life like that? What if we return to Russia and I'm in danger because of this and..."
He cut me off by lowering his lips to mine, brushing them ever so gently over my lips before he licked my top one. The motion completely took me by surprise as my breath hitched in my throat, making me freeze.
"I'm out of the game. If there is a threat still out for me, do you think I'd risk coming to you? Your safety is my top priority now, Julia. I will never let harm come to you."
His words were enough to shut me up for the moment as I wrapped an arm around his neck and pulled him back down to my lips. Brushing mine over his as he had just done to me, I took a moment to savor the heat between our bodies. He was lying between my spread legs now as I felt his erection slowly come to life. Pushing my hips upwards, I was able to slide his cock through my wet folds as I dropped my mouth open, letting out a breathy moan. His cock head pressed perfectly against my clit, nearly pushing me over the edge as I finally claimed his mouth.
Plunging my tongue into his mouth, I continued to lift and drop my hips so that he moved deliciously over me. Our tongues danced and tasted as he moaned into my mouth, his hips matching the rhythm of mine as we got lost in each other.
There was something about being so close to him like this that made my mind go fuzzy. I had been with more men than I'd like to admit but being intimate with Roman was unlike anything I'd ever experienced. When we were together, like this, I knew that anyone before him never mattered. Roman is it for me. I'll never love another man as I love him.
Roman slid his hand from my face and caressed my fevered skin until I felt him reach between us. He was still kissing me so deeply that I couldn't tell if I was breathing or if he was breathing for me.
His fingers lightly drug over my clit as my hips bucked beneath him, causing my core to tighten. He was holding my lips captive with our kiss as he teased and tormented my most sensitive spot. My hips began to move with his fingers, feeling him circle and rub harder and faster. If our lips weren't glued together, I'd be panting.
When his fingers stopped teasing me, I whimpered into his mouth, silently begging him not to stop. My throbbing pussy matched my racing heartbeat and begged for his attention. He must have sensed my need for him when I felt his cock drag over my opening. Pausing, he hovered torturously over me until I nearly lost my mind.
And then he was sinking into me. His cock stretched me in such a way that I felt like this was my first time all over again. I couldn't help but notice how perfectly we fit together, though. It was as if we were made for one another.
His cock hit so deep that I broke our kiss and threw my head back into the pillow, groaning out my satisfaction. I'm not sure what he's hitting but it was so intense that I saw stars.
Roman's chuckle filled the room as he leaned forward and drug his teeth along my jaw.
"Yes, Malishka, take all of me." He slowly pulled his hips back before plunging back into me. I let out a short scream, not able to stop it as he sank deeply back into me.
Somehow, this sex felt much different than any of the other times we'd been together. It was hard to describe, but it felt a lot like passionate love-making. Roman wasn't just fucking me. No, he was claiming what was his. And I most certainly am his.
He continued to slowly pull out and thrust in hard and I was completely at his mercy. Every muscle in my body felt frozen as I stared up into Roman's domineering blue eyes, letting him take me however he wanted to.
The control he had over my body took away my breath as I clutched onto him for dear life. My legs were wrapped tightly around his hips while the heels of my feet dug into his ass to feel him deeper. If that was even possible. His hands were gripping my hips so tightly that I'm pretty sure he'll leave marks when he's done with me. I just pegged them as branding marks. No other man will ever touch me again.
"Malishka," Roman breathed as he lowered his lips back onto mine. He began lightly nibbling my bottom lip as my mouth opened and I moaned.
"Roman, I'm..." I trailed off once my lungs captured my air. Holding my breath sometimes helped slow down my inevitable orgasm, but when I said those words, it was if Roman took it as a challenge.
His hips began to feverishly thrust his cock in and out of me while his hand came up and grabbed my throat.
"Cum for me, Malishka. I want to feel you soak my cock as I make you come undone" he growled, gripping my throat a bit more possessively.
And that was all he had to say to make me unravel. My core tightened as heat spread from between my legs and traveled out through my entire body. The way he held my throat was new but oh, so damn good. It cut off just enough oxygen to make my orgasm explode.
"Roman!" My voice cracked as every muscle in my body buzzed with ecstasy. Throwing my head back, Roman loosened his grip on my throat as he buried his face in my neck, groaning out his own release.
I was still feeling the effects from my orgasm as my walls pulsed around his cock, but he never pulled out. It was as if he didn't want to break the connection between us just yet and the feeling was mutual.
He pulled his face from my neck and stared down at me, piercing my soul with his gaze. I felt like he was trying to tell me something with this look but I wasn't sure exactly what was on his mind. His expression was unreadable and that made my heart thump just a bit faster than normal.
"I love you," I whispered, hoping that was what was on his mind and I didn't just ruin the moment between us.
A small smile tugged at the corners of his lips as he continued to stare down at me, but he said nothing. He had only told me he loved me at the end of that note he left me six months ago. I had never heard him say the words yet and hoped he still felt the same way.
"Are you ready to come home with me, Malishka?"
Hearing him talk about home made something inside of me snap. I never really had a home but deep down I felt like I had found that in Roman. I just hope that his home would be as welcoming to me as he has been.
"I'm ready," I whispered, holding his intense gaze.
Dropping his lips to mine, he passionately kissed me until I felt his cock pull free from my core. He laid beside me, pulling me tightly to his chest as he buried his face into my neck once again. The room was silent but my thundering heartbeat echoed through my head, pushing away my fears for the moment. Tomorrow was the day I'd be leaving the only place I've ever known, with a man that owned my heart. I can only hope that Russia will be as kind to me as this man has been.
Only time will tell.