Making Amends
Chat Song: âWild Horsesâ by Birdy.
âI will survive and be the one whoâs stronger. I will not beg you to stay. I will move on and you should know I mean it. Wild horses run in me.â
â˘â˘
|| July 15, 2020
8:00 pm
[Lexie had everything weighing on her mind throughout the entire day. And so while sitting up in bed, she decides to do something she didnât have the guts to do since this all began. She decides to text her mom. Though sheâs now working night shift at the hospital, she hopes sheâll still get through to her. She is in need of an urgent adult advisory.]
L: Mom?
M: Hey, Lex. Everything alright?
L: Didnât think youâd reply since youâre at work :)
M: I will always make time for you. Is everything alright?
L: Yeah everything is okay. Are you busy right now?
M: Iâm on my break. Whatâs wrong? I know you didnât text me for nothing.
L: Alright. Please donât be mad.
M: đ§Are you pregnant????
L: Jesus, mom, no!đ
M: Oh thank goodnessđ
L: You remember you asked me what was going on between me and Josh?
M: Mmđ
L: Well, I wasnât completely honest with you. Things began to get complicated between us.
M: Okay? Complicated as in?
L: Well...
(Lexie takes a deep breath.)
M: Be honest, Lex.
L: We were fooling around a little...
M: Fooling around?
L: Yeah...
M: You mean having sex?
L: No! No, no. We didnât go that far. I told him I liked him and he said he likes me too. Things like that...
M: But doesnât Josh have a girlfriend Lexie?
L: Yeah...I mean, he did. But not anymore.
M: Not anymore?
L: He broke up with her.
M: Mm. So does this have anything to do with the fact that you have a crush on him?
L: Yeah...I would say that. After I told him how I felt, he said he felt the same after a while...and then he broke up with Sabrina. And I feel guilty, I feel like itâs my fault.
M: Sigh. You feel as though you came between them?
L: Well, Iâd say maybe.
M: Mm. Alright, were you the one who told him to leave her?
L: No, I didnât. But I think itâs because we had been fooling around...
M: Fooling around. Explain what you mean.
L: We started texting and talking intimately.
M: Sweetie, you have to know that itâs wrong to flirt with a boy when heâs in a relationship, right?
L: I know, but we were only kidding around and it went a bit too far.
M: Sigh.
L: I feel awful.
M: So are you and Josh dating now?
L: No. I told him I felt guilty about everything with Sabrina.
M: I trusted you guys being in a room alone, and now it seems you two will need to start meeting in the living room, not your room. I am not ready for a grandchild, Lexie Simone.
L: Mom, I would never.
M: Alright. What do you want to do? Do you want to be with him?
L: To be honest, yes. But I am scared.
M: Love is all about risks, Lexie. If you really have feelings for him, staying away may become the biggest regret of your life. Letâs say it doesnât work out, at least you would feel good that you tried, instead of being stuck in the unknown. If I didnât try with your dad then maybe I would have regretted it up to this day. Though heâs not in our lives anymore, I am proud of myself for trying.
L: Yeah, youâre right.
M: I am not proud of you for flirting with a married boy though. But people find their life partners in the craziest ways, and I donât want to meddle in something that could be destinyâs project. I want you to choose the path that is best for you.
L: I want to be with him. But I feel guilty.
M: Why donât you message Sabrina, and try to see if you both can get to an understanding? Sheâs a girl too, and she lost her boyfriend. Sheâs hurting as well. Text her and talk to her.
L: She cussed me out. I donât want to talk to her.
M: If you are going to have a boyfriend now, you have to be more matured Lexie, or I wonât allow you to date until youâre sixty.
L: Mom! Lol.
M: Honestly.
L: Josh hurt me a lot though. I feel like I need to pick up the pieces.
M: Take some time to work on you then, and if he loves you, he will wait for you.
L: Okay...
M: The only reason I am not against this is that Josh is such a well-behaved boy.
(Lexie scrunches her nose, knowing how lustfully ânot-behavedâ Josh can be.)
M: And I have known him since he was little. I trust handing you over to him. But just know that you guys cannot meet in your bedroom until youâre both eighteen. I donât want grandkids right now; Lola is just six years old.
L: I would never, mom.
M: Mm. I have to get back to work. Text Sabrina and tell me how it goes.
L: Okay. I will.
M: Okay, love you.
L: Love you too, and mom?
M: Yes?
L: Donât expect Selene to come over anymore. Just erase her completely from your mind.
M: Oh my. Did something happen?
L: Itâs of lack of importance at this time.
M: Lol okay. Iâll erase her then.
L: Great Lol. No more Selene.
M: Whoâs Selene?
L: đđ
M: đHave a great night, sweetie. Weâll talk more about this in the morning.
L: Okay mom!đâ¤ď¸
(Lexie exits her momâs chat and clicks off her WhatsApp tab. She taps on Instagram and decides to send Sabrina a text. Intaking a breath, she begins to type her message.)
L: Hi.
(Two minutes later.)
Sa: Here to rub it in my face??đ
L: No. I just want to say I am sorry.
Sa: For what? Sexting my man and stealing him from me?
L: Sigh. I have liked Josh since the ninth grade, and I have tried to keep it inside. I really tried my hardest. I have nothing against you, and I didnât want you guys to break up.
Sa: You wanted us to break up! You wanted him, and you snaked yourself into our relationship and stole him from me!
L: I apologize if it seems that way to you, but I didnât steal him from you. Things escalated so quickly, and I didnât know how to handle the situation. I have never had any prior intimate relations with anymore. I tried to stay away, but heâs my best friend so it became a little difficult.
Sa: Bitch, please.
L: Well, I hope we can come to a settlement.
Sa: Settlement my ass, is this a fucking business proposal? Girl, bye.
L: Sigh. Sabrina, I am just trying to squash this argument between us, why are you making it so difficult? I am sorry if I offended you in any way.
Sa: ...
L: I genuinely am.
Sa: ...
L: I hope you can forgive me.
Sa: Why should I forgive you??
L: Because it makes no sense we malice each other. Itâs not good for our peace of mind and sanity.
Sa: ...
(Five minutes later.)
Sa: Okay. Apology accepted.
L: ...
(Two minutes later...)
Sa: And I am sorry for calling you a man-snatcher. Truth is, I knew you and Josh were made for each other since the first day I saw you guys together. There was just something there, and I couldnât put my finger on it. I knew this would happen. I was just staying around on wishful thinking.
L: đ
Sa: Itâs alright. I am prettier than you so Iâll get a boyfriend fast enough.
L: ...
Sa: So, are you two dating now?
L: No.
Sa: Oh. I accept your apology, and I have nothing against you.
L: I accept your apology too.
Sa: Okay.
L: Yeah.
Sa: But we still canât be friends. Because if we all hang out, I might end up fucking Josh when youâre not aroundđ
(Lexie blinks at her screen.)
Sa: Anyways, Chao! About to go put my nighttime moisturizer on. Have a goodnight Lexie Simoneđ
L: You too...
Lexie stares at her screen as Sabrinaâs status switches to offline. Sheâs not sure how to perceive the conversation they just held, and she isnât sure if Sabrina genuinely forgives her, but at least she was the bigger man and apologized first.