Tyler’s point of view:
Jan, 22nd 2022
I can't even put it into words
You were the song to my cords
Can you believe how it ended?!
Tears streaming down
I lost myself baby
I lost myself baby
The day I lost you
Yeah “Forever Kisses! Forever Kisses!” the crowd cheered for our band as we played. Their voices increasing louder and louder almost shaking the fixed ground. It made me feel good. It made me feel worthy. It made me feel like my message was out there and going further.
We are a band of five. We work day and night for this to work. We write our own music, play it and give it our best. Our emotions, tears, screams and pain are all their, and even our heart breaks, more accurately, my heart break. I don’t know how it all ended but I know how it all happened. They say that boys are usually those of the heartbreak but in my case, one girl was able to bring me to my knees because of my love for her. I don’t even know how I feel about it. I don’t know what hurt more the fact that I can’t get her off my mind, or the fact that she left me hanging between life and death and I have no idea how to hate her.
“Thank you,” Lucas said over and over again as we finished our song. Lucas was the oldest one of us standing at twenty four. I am twenty one myself. We were all different and everyone had his charm. Lucas has always been a talker and with his different colored eyes, he sure attracted a lot of girls and fans. However, he seemed like he had someone in his heart already. It all seemed like a secret though. Nate had his own secrets too, and it is safe to say that they seemed awfully deep and sacred. No one dared ask the American Russian guy anyway. He had that aura and that look that scared all of us and told us to stop.
“To everyone of you, we will all like to thank you. We thank you all from the bottom of our hearts, those who send us that far, those who just knew us and keep giving us new boasts, those watching us here, and those watching us through screens. We appreciate every single soul of you. You made us forever kisses, you made us what we are now. We could have never been here without you. My friends and I have gone through a lot and worked hard, but you brought us here. Without your love, we would have all been a no one. That is why we encourage you all to work, follow your dreams no matter how far we are, only a year ago we would have never imagined this place with all of you here. Thank you all,” Lucas said as we all stood at the edge of the stage.
The cheers increased making me smile. That has always been my dream, standing there with a crowd waiting for my music, feeling the emotions I had while writing, understanding, cheering, dancing and yelling, but something does not feel right. Something seems missing. I had an idea what it was. It was her, she was the beginning and the end of my story. Four years have passed and she was still the one for me. It hurts how it all ended so sudden. However, I still haven’t given up, she was the beginning. She pulled back, ran away, but I will bring her back to me, even if it was over my dead body.
I looked up at the sky. The full moon and the stars around it were shinning just like that night. The night when it all began and surprisingly today was the anniversary. It all started on January 22nd 2016. That was the day I met my angel and my girl, Lynn.
January, 22nd 2016
“Okay, who is hungry? We had a long day training,” I said as I walked with the boys. Lucas, Nate and I were walking together after training. Leonardo and Emmanuel were sleeping. We had a pretty long day and to say that they were exhausting would be an understatement.
“Why are you so damn energetic?” Nate asked with a groan as he passed his hand through his brown hair. Nate had some cold blue eyes and sharp features. He has always been tough too, so it really suits him well.
“I am not so damn energetic,” I replied. We walked in to a café, coffee house café. It reminded me of the series friends in a way. I have always been a fan of it. It just never gets old.
“You are,” Nate argued back. We headed to an empty table and sat down. We were still not famous and we have not really dropped any songs yet. Then, we were only doing covers, mashups and all. We all were mainly focusing on what we do as we were all slowly getting used to it. That day was technically our first day writing our own songs. Emmanuel already knows how to do so pretty well thanks to his dad who was a song writer. He taught him a couple of tricks and later on, he taught us too. That day I felt good as if I was luckiest man in the world, and later on I realized why. That day I met my lucky charm.
“How may I help you on this bright night?” came a blonde blue eyed waitress. That was all it took for me to stare. Her smile could brighten up my day. I was barely fifteen then and she was fourteen working there. She seemed like an angel falling from heaven for me and as many teen boys I developed my very first crush.
“I would like bubble tea,” eighteen year old Lucas said and she smiled and nodded. She wrote it down in her notes and I admired her focused gaze. I had no idea what was wrong with me but I was sure that something was.
“I want some latte,” seventeen year old Nate said and she nodded as she wrote it down still wearing that smile.
“What may I get you?” she said as she directed the question to me. I guess I was just left staring at her as I noticed the tiny blush that creeped on her pale cheeks. I was aware of nothing that night until Nate pinched me and just then I snapped.
“Why did you do that?” I asked. He rolled his eyes and pointed at the waitress, the gorgeous waitress to be exact.
“Oh, right, yeah! I have no idea what I want, so may you please pick something for me?” I asked. I swear when I walked through the door I knew what I had in mind and for a second I feared what she might order. However, the smile she gave me eased all of that.
“I will get you my favorite,” She said and my smile widened.
“He is allergic t-,” Lucas started but I stopped him. I would have whatever she gives anyway. She furrowed her eyebrows and shot me a confused look. I just smiled, so she shrugged and left. The way she understood my simple gestures made me feel different. It made me feel as if we had some kind of a secret language.
“What’s up with that?” Lucas asked with a raised eyebrow. I ran my hand through my hair nervously as I had no idea what was wrong with me. I was never like that.
“I think someone is having his first crush,” Nate said with a smirk and Lucas stared at me in disbelief. Leonardo and I were the youngest of the group, so we were treated as babies most of the time. I was a year older than Leo though. The red headed boy was sure treated as a baby and with his young baby face he fit the role. He had some amber brown eyes unlike my forest green ones but like Emmanuel’s ones except Emmanuel’s were chocolate brown adding to his kind warm black features. He was black but had the kindest wide eyes and brown hair.
“I am not or I am. I have no idea,” I said and I even surprised myself with that reply. Was I? Now after all these years I know cause that waitress was my angel. That waitress was my Lynn. As cliché as that was, I knew she was mine the second I laid my eyes on her. She didn’t know it yet and had no idea, but I will make sure she does.
“Here you go,” she said as she gave us our drinks. “I hope you like them, and as for you, sir, I brought you my favorite which is Frappuccino. I hope you like it.”
“But,” Nate started and I stopped him. I had an allergy to coffee, but she said it was her favorite. I smiled and then said, “Thank you.”
She gave a confused look and I don’t blame her. However, she didn’t comment before leaving to serve someone else. Lucas and Nate rolled their eyes as soon as she was gone.
“What will you do now?” Nate asked and I frowned at the cup thinking. I looked at Lucas with a sheepish smile and he rolled his eyes and gave me his bubble tea.
“Fine, just no need for a number next time,” Lucas said with an eye roll as he started drinking his or my drink. I watched the waitress also known as my Lynn as she served everyone around. I noticed how she wasn’t flirty or slutty. She was nice sending smiles and talking politely. I loved that.
When we were done with our drinks, I exchanged cups again and called for Lynn. She flashed me a smile as she walked to us. She took the drinks on her tray and said maintaining that smile, “Hey, how were the drinks?”
“Pretty good!” we all said at the same time making her smile widen. “I am glad.” She replied before she took off. She spared me an extra glance making me grin widely. I had no idea what was wrong with me that day and I didn’t believe I ever will. I will never know as long as she was not close. She made me feel happy with one smile and I will make sure she stays happy all her life. That was the promise I gave in my mind that day which I couldn’t keep by the way.
“Let’s go back! It is getting late already,” Lucas said. I didn’t want to. I wanted to stay. I wanted Lynn in my sight. What was wrong with me? That was a question I had no idea how to answer. She was just a girl. No matter how gorgeous she was, she was just a girl who I just met. I couldn’t be loving her already. I didn’t believe in love at first sight then. I believed that love was made especially after my parents got divorced. I didn’t believe love existed but Lynn came to prove me otherwise…
That was the first night I met her and I decided that it won’t be last because I felt something pulling me in and that something was not letting me go. It was pulling me in more and more and I was too curious to fight it. That’s my story with my beloved Lynn, the one that got my heart beating and not letting me go. She was the beat to all my songs and the soul of my body and then and there, she became my inspiration.