Estranged Trust

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Saying Goodbye


The whole day was exhausting but well worth it. Brandt’s mother had so many great ideas it overwhelmed me, but she took it all in stride. I loved watching Brandt interact with them as well. His parents’ support and love brought tears to my eyes. It seemed natural and not forced, effortless almost in a way, and better than he addressed them in the past. He was trying, or maybe he wasn’t fighting so hard to keep them at arm’s length anymore. Either way, I saw something spectacular take root, and I knew it would only blossom further.

What started out as a hole in the wall had morphed into the making of the TajMahal. Going from room to room with his mother gave me more ideas and the dollar signs kept adding up. Walking out of the master closet, I looked towards the master bath, thinking back to when I was pregnant, and we discussed adding a door on the other side. The one that would lead to the nursery. If I was doing all this remodeling, now would be the time to do it too. Would Brandt agree? Was I pushing some imaginary boundaries by suggesting this? I brought up the idea to Maggie, and she smiled with tears in her eyes. She concurred and worked it in the plans as she loved the idea.

Maggie’s ideas were so intuitive, and I couldn’t say no to any of them. The only hesitation came when she wanted the washer and dryer on the second floor. When Brandt gave the idea to add on over the garage, I had to stop the discussion for fear of changing the house too excessively. He insisted, shaking his head at me and laughing. With a kiss on the nose and a quick hug, he turned to his father and told him to make it happen.

My head was spinning by the end of the day, and beyond tired by the time night came. When his parents went to bed early with the time change and all, I dragged Brandt into the family room to discuss one last thing on my mind before we went to bed. What to do with the fireplace. Maggie advised to leave it with the natural stone but adding a colored glaze to it as more of a focal point. When I turned and found Brandt staring and not listening to me, my eyes followed his, and I spotted the urn on the mantel.

The small silver urn with the pink top and base sat there out of place. Our child sat in a sterile-looking container that didn’t express us at all. Should I get one that did? No, it didn’t seem right. When I thought of our little girl, I envisioned a happy, spunky, full of spirit child bouncing around and laughing and singing. She shouldn’t be holed up in our house. Instantly, I knew what needed to be done.

“Brandt, I don’t want her here.”

My statement shocked him. “She shouldn’t be here.” His face grew solemn, and he looked down at the ground. “Holly shouldn’t be sitting there. The little girl I imagined growing up with us wouldn’t want to be put on a shelf.”

He pulled me into his warm embrace, and I welcomed him. We stood and stared at the urn together. “What were you thinking?”

We swayed back and forth while I tried to find the right words. “Our daughter would love the water just like we do.” He nodded but said nothing. “I want to put her in the ocean.”

He wasn’t surprised at my words but instead released his grip and turned me towards him. Kissing my lips gently, he met my eyes, “Then let’s do it.”

We walked outside to the incoming tide. Taking our shoes off, the cold water submerged our feet, causing a welcoming numbness. We got about as far as we could, and without saying any words, let her ashes drift out into the water. It was sad letting her go. I wouldn’t have her near me all the time, but she shouldn’t be sitting on some mantel. A child of ours would be a free spirit, and now she could enjoy nature along with us. She was now part of the ocean. The same ocean we sat near and longed after while we were enjoying our morning coffee or watching the sunset. The ocean meant so much to us and now had even more meaning.

Returning to the house, I felt more at peace than ever before. With our French doors open and the sound of the incoming tide in the background, we meld into each other. There would never be closure for what we went through but there was acceptance, and the thought we had survived yet another obstacle made it seem that nothing would ever be able to pull us apart again.

The new day’s light flooded into our bedroom by morning, and I looked over at a sleeping Brandt. I loved him. I loved him more right now than ever before. And I wanted to show him.

Slowly I coasted on top of his sleeping chest and started kissing his neck. He groaned as his hand came up my side to hold me close to him. I kissed him with zeal, remembering the last time we made love. The last time I could tell he was a little too focused on my thin body for him to give over to his pleasure for very long, and so this time I wanted to redirect his attention. “Close your eyes,” I whispered into his throat while licking his pulse point, feeling it come alive under my tongue.

“Chelsea we...”

I didn’t let him finish, “And keep them closed.”

He protested again but when I said, “Please,” he gave a small chuckle and shook his head growing excited at the prospect given the way his member tented the bedsheets.

After making sure his eyes were still shut, I climbed further on top of him. Taking his left hand, I brought it up to my breast. The hint proved positive, and he started to tug and twist at my nipple, sending shock waves through my body. I moaned my approval and led his right hand down to my sex. First, he idly circled my clit like he had all the time in the world and I moaned. He laughed, and I could feel his morning wood strengthen underneath me. Even with me trying to establish dominance, he flaunted his control over me, and I couldn’t be more aroused. We needed this. We needed a release from the strain we had been under, and I couldn’t think of a better way.

Kissing his jaw, I moved to the other side while he made my clit come alive. Talented fingertips circled, and then flicked it ever so lightly, causing me to suck in my breath. He smirked at my response, and I lightly nipped at his neck.

His left hand moved to pull at my neglected right nipple as he slid his finger deep inside my folds. My mission to dominate now thwarted, he gained control while working my body into a frenzy on top of him. I whimpered, and he shifted underneath me, directing his now hardened member in the path of my heat. Slowly, he entered me and my back arched into it. He filled me up gradually, caressing my sensitive inner folds.

Wet. I was so wet and aroused. I took him into myself fully with little to no effort.

The pain that surfaced the last time we made love had vanished. This time only pleasure wracked my body, and only when fully seated on his length did I let my hips grind into him wallowing in bliss at his cock buried inside of me. The sensation hit me full force, and I gave in, arching my back, writhing in luxury. Brandt took his hands and rested them lightly on my hips, setting the pace, sure to drive me over the edge. I quickly looked down at him, verifying that he kept his end of the deal. His eyes were firmly shut but the set of his jaw and the crook of his head indicated his want and need. He was so masculine and virile, and I dampened our union further as I reached above him and held on to the headboard tight, set to ride him and gyrate on his cock.

The shift to my body caused my nipple to brush against his jaw, and he turned to seek it with his mouth. I lowered it just a little more, as he sucked the sensitive bud. Gasping at the jolt of electricity he sent down my body, it only made me ride him faster.

I set out to fulfill a need for him but lost myself in my own pleasure. So much had been taken from us but this, this need to comfort each other, pleasure each other, this would always be there. It was strong at the beginning of our relationship, and it grew just as strong now.

Picking up the pace, I noticed slight resistance from Brandt. He was gentle, careful not to get too rough, but it was my call. Maybe it was too soon, but I had gone beyond the point of caring. If this caused me to be sore, it would be a plight I would gladly bear as there was no talking my body out of the pleasure he gave me now.

Brandt groaned with each downstroke, and when I undulate around his throbbing cock, I felt him grow incredibly harder. A heat built inside me increasing to a pinnacle, and when it reached my chest, I felt the prickly sensations that started the tidal wave of my climax and realized there was no going back. I gave in, and when Brandt braced himself on the bed and met me on the downstroke, I shattered around him. With my arms shaking, I cried out his name as I slumped forward on top of his heaving chest.

And then I felt him release inside of me. The spasming of his cock brought a surge of fluid to wash my inner walls, and it gloriously extended my orgasm with each throb. Paired with my own sensations of pulsating muscles, I couldn’t tell which one felt better. I turned my head toward him and saw Brandt watching me.

“Hey. I didn’t tell you to open your eyes.”

He laughed sliding his arms around me caressing my skin, “You know that if you are going to orgasm, I am going to watch.”

I nodded my head. “Yeah well, I guess you earned it.” He smirked at me as I laid my head on his chest, still connected intimately with him. Neither one of us wanted to move. I wanted to stay joined with him forever, but I knew it was impossible. Or was it? Physically yes, but emotionally he would always have my heart.

Brandt’s hand came up to caress my cheek as he whispered in the light of the day, “I love you.” His sincerity brought a tear to my eye but I willed them away. Smiling at him, I knew I would go through hell and back if only to know he would always be with me.

Nodding my head, I countered, “You should.”

Thank you for joining me to the end of Book 5. This book was not easy to write but I knew it was part of their story all along. Sorry to disappoint, but if you follow me to Book 6 you will see their story has a happy ending. Don’t you think they deserve it?

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