In Holy Mafiamony: Til Death Do Us Part

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Ch.9| Don’t Make Me Laugh

Later that day, Lincoln took me to get a new laptop. I had to argue with him for more than an hour as to why I didn't want to get a Mac, and eventually, I got my way. The next two weeks consisted of me waking up to a cold side of the bed and me falling asleep alone, not that I minded though, my mind was busy preparing for classes.


"Girl, I'm going to kill that husband of yours!" Ivanna barked through the phone.

"What did he do now?" I grumbled, still half asleep.

"He took Milosh! How am I supposed to find out the gender of our children today without my husband there with me, Alaiyah?!" I pulled the phone away from my ear as she yelled into it from the other end.

"I'll call him and demand he gives Milosh back to you." I couldn't help but laugh at this conversation.

"It's not funny! He refuses to give me my husband back; they are on their way to Italy to speak with the bumble fuck." I found myself clenching my jaw at what Ivanna just told me. Lincoln hasn't been home in the last two weeks, and now I hear from someone who is not my husband that he is currently on his way to Italy.

He's definitely sleeping on the couch when his ass gets back. He'll be lucky if I don't shoot him! I screamed to myself.

"Ivanna, what if I come with you? They can tell me the genders, and we can have a cliché gender reveal when dumb and dumber get home." Not only was I pissed that Lincoln didn't tell me he was leaving, but I was livid that he took Milosh with him. His right hand was supposed to be Fabian, but these days it seemed Milosh and him were becoming closer than ever.

"You know what? Let's do that. Then we can go shopping on your husband's dime for being an asshole!" Ivanna laughed.

"I couldn't agree more! What time should I pick you up?" I asked, walking to the closet.

"Well, my appointment's at one, so why don't we make it twelve-fifteen?" She suggested.

"Twelve-fifteen is good for me!" We confirmed our plans, and I hung up, pressing my fingers against the side of my forehead.

I went to bed last night with a stress headache and woke up with an even bigger one. After getting changed, I ate a light breakfast and printed out the list of things I needed to get for school. I then occupied my mind by organizing our bathroom, and then I watched the latest episode of Blindspot. By the time that was all done, it was time to go get the wifey.


"Get in loser; we're going shopping!" I yelled, pulling into Ivana's driveway.

"Okay, Regina George." Ivanna rolled her eyes at the 2004 Mean Girls quote.

Ivanna hopped in the passenger's seat with a smile.

"Your husband is lucky that I love you. Otherwise, I would have castrated him by now," Ivanna teased.

"Girl, don't even worry about it, the future already has that in his deck of cards." I glanced over to Ivanna as I continued driving, only to see her laughing her ass off.

"Girl, you can't do that to me! I am almost five months pregnant with triplets! bladder control, where?!" We both broke out in a fit of laughter.

"Where am I talking to you again?" I asked, pulling onto the highway.

"Women's Health on Main," A light bulb went off in my head as Ivanna said that.

"Really? That's the clinic I got to!" It was refreshing to hang out with someone so similar to me.

"Sisters!" Ivanna yelled out, causing us to go into another fit of laughter.

After a fifteen-minute drive, we arrived at the Clinic. I was so excited to be the first person to know how many nieces or nephews I was going to have.


"Hi, I have a one o'clock appointment with Dr. Rossi," Ivanna said to the lady sitting at the counter.

"And your name, love?" The nurse asked.

"Ivanna Costello." Ivanna couldn't help but roll her eyes, knowing the nurse knew damn well what her name was.

"And your date of birth?" The nurse asked rhetorically.

"Seven. Twenty-Eight. Nineteen-Eighty." I sucked my lips together, trying not to laugh.

"And is Anthem still your Insurance carrier?" The nurse was typing away as Ivanna was becoming more annoyed.

"Yes, ma'am." Ivanna tapped her nails on the counter as the nurse verified the rest of her information.


"Okay, you may have a seat." The nurse smiled.

"Oh, and Alaiyah!" The nurse called out as she spotted me.

"Yeah?" I asked, turning around to meet her.

"I was actually just about to give you another call. Our records are showing that you are past-due for a birth-control shot. We have a cancellation for two-fifteen, would you want me to schedule you in see Dr. Costa?"

"Um, yeah, that will be fine." I gave the nurse all my information and then went to sit with Ivanna. We waited for about seven minutes before she got called in.

"So no, Mr. Costello today?" Dr. Rossi joked.

"No, her Mr. Costello took my Mr. Costello on a business trip that couldn't wait a single day," Ivanna joked back.

"Ah, I see. And who do we have with you today?" Dr. Rossi asked, setting up the ultrasound machine.

"This is my best-friend, Alaiyah." Ivanna smiled as Dr. Rossi put some gel on her stomach.


"And there we have it. All thirty fingers and toes, strong heartbeats, and they are all measuring on track. Now, would you like to know the genders, Mrs. Costello?" Dr. Rossi smiled.

"If you could just write the genders on the sonogram and give them to Alaiyah. I want to wait till my husband is back to know, and she wants to throw a party," Ivanna said, looking at me.

"Your wish is my command." Dr.Rossi typed away at the computer for a couple more minutes before he gave Ivanna a towel to wipe the gel off, while he stepped out of the room to grab the pictures.

"Okay, this is for you Alaiyah, it holds the answers to life's best riddle," Dr. Rossi stated poetically as he handed me a white envelope.

"And as for you, Mrs. Costello, I want to see you back here in one month! As always, You can schedule your appointment at the front desk, and Alaiyah, you can follow me to the room where Dr. Costa will be meeting with you." Dr. Rossi shook Ivanna's hand; then, we parted ways to go to our destinations.

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