My first relationship was in 10th grade. It started off okay but it began to become a more negative relationship. My boyfriend would go to parties while I would hang out at his house. He’d come home drunk and he would always try to force me to do things. Whenever I told him no he turned it around on me and called me a bitch and that I never wanted to have fun. He’d shove me and put me down emotionally. The next day he’d pretend like it never happened. The first time I went off on him but I learned pretty quickly I should just keep my mouth shut.
Even though mom and dad were in the picture, it felt like they weren’t. Most would think that being an only child is the best thing ever, but it’s not. Yeah, we got what we wanted most of the time but it was lonely and it got boring really quickly. Our last family meal was back when I was in 7th grade. I wasn’t close to either of my parents at any point but when dad got a promotion, he was working long days, 8 am-6 pm were his hours making him gone for a longer amount of time. However, he usually went out with his buddies at the bar so he wouldn’t get home till about 10 or 11 pm and he would pretty much go right to bed. Dad was oblivious about mom. Mom was having an affair with one of her co-workers and it had been going on for at least a year. My mom worked at the nearby hospital as a nurse. She usually worked the check-in desk for about half of her overall shifts. Other days she worked as a night-nurse, however, 80% of the days where she worked “night-shifts” she was over at her co-worker's house. She didn’t think I knew and I frankly didn’t care.
From 5th to 8th grade, my nickname was Ellie the Elephant. I was made fun of for being “overweight” even though I was 5’5 and I weighed 155 which my doctor at the time said was a decently healthy weight and that I should just try to build some muscle to even out any excess fat. I procrastinated for a good 2 and a half years before I was finally irritated enough with the rude nicknames. I exercised 4 days a week and began eating smaller portions. I didn’t begin to see results until late June after 8th grade ended. I continued this routine all throughout the summer dropping from 155 to about 125 in a span of 2 and a half months.
After my first year of high school, I was transferred to another nearby school. Before sophomore year started, I decided to get my hair dyed. I went from light brown to dark burgundy and I also got my eyebrows and lip waxed for the first time. When the first day of school came, I felt confident with myself. I had a body that was fairly close to what I had dreamed of for years and I was starting at a completely new school so it was the perfect time for a fresh start. When I walked into my first class, I sat down at a table in the front and was immediately joined by a group of 2 girls and 2 guys. I had a plan to stay focused in class and to get my work done but I had a feeling I wasn’t going to get much done with the kids at my table. Their names were Alexa, Sydney, Jason, and Daniel. I assumed all 4 were popular, mainly because they were all fairly good-looking and seemed pretty outgoing.
Then there was this one guy who walked in. He caught my eye right away. He was a dirty blonde, blue-eyed, 5’11, hockey player. However, his smile was one of the brightest things I’d ever seen. I stood up and grabbed my bag, moving to the table next to the guy. The bell rang and in came in the last group of kids.