Ch. 10 - Feelings Happen
It’s been a few weeks, and I can definitely say that Jay and I built a bond as the days went by. To my surprise, once I really got to know him, he wasn’t snobby or discriminatory like a lot of the other popular rich kids were. Livie also started becoming one of my first female friends and as for Cyrus, well it was more complicated.
Although we did get a bit closer, it only applies when we are outside of school. He’s nice and chill with me then, but when we are in school, it’s like that side of him is shut off, and it leaves me confused. I get that it’s because he has to maintain his professionalism when we are in school, but it’s hard to get used to. It’s like he has two completely different sides to him.
Just like how my usual mornings went, I was currently quietly talking with Jay and Livie, the three of us sitting next to each other.
“Girl I didn’t expect you to look so cute in your work outfit when I went to visit you at the café last night!“, Jay said a little too loud, making eyes turn our way. But one cold glare from me, and they all turned back to mind their own business.
“H-He went to visit you at the Moodlift Café yesterday?“, Livie asked softly.
“Yeah, he did.“, I grumbled while glowering at Jay. “The bitch embarrassed the crap out of me in front of my co-workers in the process.”
I turned to see Livie’s facial expression, and it looked almost...upset? She was laughing just like Jay was, but it didn’t feel genuine.
I wanted to ask her about it, but then decided against it, not wanting to come off as nosy just in case she didn’t want that.
When it was time for chemistry class, I felt my mood go both up and down at the same time. It was up because I’d get to see Cyrus’s face, but I was down for that reason as well, since I knew that he would be cold towards me like he is with the other girls in the class.
Jay was walking me to chemistry since it was near his own class, and he whispered something in my ear, making me giggle and slap his arm. As I was laughing, I turned my head towards the class door, seeing Cyrus, or shall I say Mr. Moreau, standing there with an unreadable expression on his face as he wearily eyed Jay.
Jay casually kissed my cheek, something I’ve grown comfortable with, but it wasn’t done romantically or anything like that.
After saying our goodbyes, I walked into chemistry without acknowledging Cyrus, which was unlike me. Why bother trying to greet him if he’s just gonna brush me off like he did every other day?
Like always, Blaine looked at me with hopeful eyes and stood in front of me, expecting me to let him come back into my life. And also like always, I brushed him off and kept walking towards my seat at the back.
“I figured out that she was arrogant a few days into seeing her here, but I didn’t know that she was this much of a rude bitch. She even ignores her own younger brother who consistently tries being nice to her.”
“Don’t put your nose where it doesn’t belong, Nathan.“, I warned him. “Getting on my bad side isn’t something you’ll like the outcome of.”
“Am I supposed to be scared of someone like you? You just seem like you’re all talk, but you can’t do shit.“, he said cockily, joining the rest of his friends who were laughing.
I’ve fucking had enough of his ass getting on my nerves almost every time he sees me.
I harshly slammed my fist down onto the table in front of him, hearing the test tubes and beakers vibrate against it because of the impact. Nathan and his friends quickly snapped their eyes towards me, not expecting me to react that way.
I brought my face really close to Nathan’s, seeing his adam’s apple bob up and down from nervousness, making me inwardly smirk.
“If you really think I’m someone that’s too scared to actually do anything...“, I began. “That’ll be your biggest mistake, because I’m far from nice. You already know that I got expelled from my previous school because I was violent towards people there, and if you don’t control yourself now, I’ll have no problem behaving like that again. So stay the fuck away and keep your bullshit to yourself, Nathan.”
“Miss. Hart, behave.“, Mr. Moreau interrupted from behind me. “Same goes for you, Nathan. Quit commenting on things you don’t know about.”
I just childishly rolled my eyes and went to my seat, hating how two-faced Cyrus could be sometimes.
After class was over, I was the last person to head out since my seat was farthest away from the door, but before I could make it out, I felt a hand grab my arm and harshly pull me back before pinning me against the wall.
Cyrus was glowering down at me and I felt my breath hitch at the close proximity.
“Let me go, Mr. Moreau.”
He didn’t seem pleased with my answer, seeing how he just came even closer instead and intimidatingly raised an eyebrow at me.
“I told you that it’s Cyrus when other people aren’t around.”
“Just tell me what you held me back for.“, I said, ignoring his comment.
“Who was that guy you were walking with earlier?”
“I don’t see how I’m obligated to answer that question.”
“If you don’t tell me, I can just go find out on my own accord.”
“He’s my friend, Jay.“, I grumbled, the annoyance clear on my face.
“Are you sure he’s just a friend?“, he asked me, his eyes turning cold.
“Um...as far as I’m concerned, yes he is.“, I retorted. “A friend who actually spends time with me and doesn’t treat me like shit.”
“Then why the fuck did he kiss you earlier, Xia?”
Why does it almost sound like he’s jealous right now?
“It’s none of your fucking business.”
“Tell me while I’m still asking nicely.“, he commanded, his grip on my waist tightening, making me flinch from surprise.
“W-We are just friends, nothing more. He kisses me on the cheek as a form of affection, there’s nothing romantic between both of us.”
“Yeah, but either way, why do I have to tell you? It’s not like you’re my boyfriend or some shit. Why are you acting so concerned about my friend circle all of a sudden, as if you actually care?“, I blurted out, seeing him look at me as a sign to continue what I was trying to get at.
“I get wanting to maintain your professionalism, but you literally don’t even greet me back when I say a simple hi while walking into the class. You treat me just like how you treat all of the other girls in this class, the ones who try getting your attention like desperate whores. And now you’re interrogating me about the people you see me talking to.”
“That’s because if I don’t remain indifferent, I’ll end up doing something I’ll regret because I know you won’t like it and you’ll push me away from your life.“, he said gently.
“Yeah, right.“, I commented sarcastically, because a part of me wanted to believe him, but then the stubborn side of me disagreed. “You’re being unreasonable right now. Exactly what is so fucking bad that it’ll make me push you away?”
“I like you, Xia.“, he said, his voice a bit louder this time from frustration.
“Y-You what?“, I asked, not knowing if I heard him correctly or not. My breathing started getting uneven when I felt him press his upper body against mine, leaving no room between us.
“I said that it’s because I fucking like you, and I know that I have no right to feel this way towards a student, even if it’s technically legal. And I also know that you’ll never reciprocate the feelings, so I hold myself back from doing anything.”
“How are you so sure about my feelings, Cyrus?”
I think this is the first time I went through a writer’s block. I really didn’t know how to format this chapter in the beginning, so it took a lot longer to write it than usual. Let me know your thoughts in the comments! - Venus <3