At the end of the month of June, Joe finally may have a day off from work to visit Deeana. He tells her the week before that he may, to see what she says.
"I may get next Thursday off, I can come to see you," Joe says.
"Really? I can't wait! I want to hold you, kiss you. Just be close to you." Deeana responds.
"Yes, same here. I will know for sure next Wednesday. So I will let you know. Are you going to be scared?"Joe asks.
"No, I am not scared of you, I feel so safe with you. I always have. I will be really nervous though. I won't be able to believe it's you." Deeana states.
"Don't be nervous, it's just me. I don't bite. I won't do anything you don't want to do." Joe says.
"I want you more than anything, but I am not sure I can do that on the first date. You know how we were raised. Good girls don't do...those kinds of things." Deeana admits.
"I know, we won't do anything you don't want to. I would never expect that from you on the first date. But whatever does happen is between us, no one else. It's not like we are just meeting. We know each other forever. And I do want you." Joe answers.
"I want you too, more than you know. I am for sure hugging you and I want our first kiss. I don't know much about French kissing though. Just regular kisses." Deeana confesses.
"We will hug and kiss for sure. Is it ok if I put my hand on your thigh? Don't worry about it, I will show you. It's not like I am going to shove my tongue down your throat. There is a way to it, to make it sensual." Joe reveals.
"Yes, you can put your hand on my thigh. I would like that and Ok to the kissing. You should know my hand's sweat when I am nervous." Deeana states.
"Don't worry about it, so do mine. Just another thing we have in common. I was always worried about it in the past." Joe admits.
"That makes me feel so much better knowing you have it too. I worry about it as well, always have." Deeana comments.
"Don't worry about it. It's all fine trust me." Joe answers.
They keep talking about when they would meet, and how it would go. Both of them still in shock that this was happening with each other, and who it was with. There was sexual chemistry between them, and Joe wasn't sure how it would go. He knew that Deeana was very inexperienced but also coming out of her shell little by little with him. He was very attracted to her, and she was to him as well. He just knew the first date would probably not wind up with sex but he wanted to be as close to her as he could be.
Deeana wanted Joe in every way possible, it was easy to talk sexy to him online, or through text, in person was a bit different for her. She was very shy, and she hadn't had sex in a while. Not to mention her upbringing was nagging at her. At much as she wanted to just go to his place and rip his clothes off, she knew good girls didn't do things like that. What would that show Joe? She didn't want him to think she was fast or easy. Then she would say to herself its been twenty-eight years...."You think we waited long enough?" It was a battle within herself on what to do. So she would just wait and see. Being honest with him, that she wasn't sure she could do that the first time. Even though she knew when he would touch her, she would melt.
This was something she always wanted, to be this close to him. Then just thinking about him kissing her made her nervous. She was now a forty-three-year-old woman feeling like a thirteen-year-old girl. Joe had this way of making her go back in time in so many ways. She doesn't remember feeling this shy or nervous about anything before. She did know she wasn't backing out, no matter what. If he could make it, she would be there. She needed to see this through, she needed to know where this would go or how it would end?
Joe was scared she wouldn't like him in person the way she did online. That the boy she once loved wouldn't be the man he was now. That he would do something to make the idea of what she had in her head about him disappear.
Deeana was scared he may not like her in person either. It was a long time since they were kids. She didn't worry about not liking Joe, no matter what, he was her Joe. She could just sit and listen to his voice and sit next to him and be happy. She loved listening to his stories. She just knew she was the boring one, and she hoped he would be ok with that.
The rest of the week goes by like normal. They spend all the time with each other. Still telling stories and getting to know each other, and sharing more sex talk both wanting the other more and more. Their relationship was growing in every way, getting closer and closer.
They do their regular routines, just taking each other with them. On Sunday Joe goes to Shop Rite to buy food, taking her with him on the phone, talking to her through it all. Then going to wash his car, and going home to clean. The closeness like nothing experienced before. There was trust and love. It might have been regular ordinary everything things, but it meant so much. It was time being taken out for each other. It was showing the other they were there, and doing anything together made them happy. It didn't have to be fancy, it was just being together that mattered.
Deeana never second-guessed or worried. She trusted Joe in every way. Something she hasn't done in a long time. The relationship was filled with contentment. It was something very new and refreshing.