Deeana sends the email, wondering how that will make him feel? Will it scare him away or make him happy to know she isn't playing around? At this point, she really isn't sure but at the same time, feels he needs to know she is serious about this, and if he isn't he needs to let her know. It's not like she is just changing her own life, she is changing her daughters and even her husbands, and if Joe isn't in this for the long haul it wasn't even worth going forward with.
Joe gets the email just figuring here she goes again with her long emails. He just laughs, knowing she doesn't give up, no matter what. It amazes him that she cares so much, to stick with this.
He opens the email and reads it line by line never thinking she would take action so fast. He doesn't know what to think, she is willing to do all this for me? For us? He sees that some of it are small things but if Phill has noticed it, it's not that small. She isn't hiding how she is feeling, she is letting it be known. He wonders what Phill is thinking to himself? Knowing if it was him he would be wondering all kinds of things.
He reads that she found her voice and he is proud and happy that she has. Knowing that Phill hasn't been the best husband to her, and she stays quiet for far too long. He saw that as a great thing that she was picking up for herself.
He knows she is really serious anytime she actually talked to her daughters, that was the one step that made him think, she is for real. You wouldn't bring them into this if you weren't. Why tell them anything if she had no intention of leaving? She was really doing all this to be with him? He kept asking himself that the whole time he read the email. Also knowing that this wasn't a game, other people were involved. She meant business and wanted a life with him. She fell in love with him.
All this confused and amazed him at the same time, he had never had this before. A woman that ran after him, loved him so deeply that she would leave everything for him. He didn't know what to say to it. In the past relationships he was the one to run after, he chased and got hurt. Its what was keeping him back as well. He just saw that she wasn't scared to chase him, to tell how she really felt about him. Even when he stayed away and shut her out, she was still here trying her best to get him to let her in.
Joe sat there reading the email over and over again. Now knowing just how much she really loved him, that all these years apart could be over. Maybe he could get his happy ending? He knew he loved her also, he loved being with her, he felt the connection, the love, the hope. It was all he ever wanted and more. He just hopes that she is sure about all this before doing it. Once done there was no turning back. He just hopes he can be all she really wants, it scared him that he can't live up to her expectation of him. She sees him as perfect as he was far from it. Then he sees even after hurting her, she returned to him. Putting up with weeks at a time of him not answering her, ignoring her, calls, messages, and emails.
She did see he wasn't perfect but she still wanted him, still loved him greatly and nothing was going to change that. She told him once she would love him till her dying day, and she meant it. It wasn't just words to her, it was what was in her heart. Its what she felt. No one is perfect, life isn't perfect. She wasn't perfect either. She had insecurities, and her overthinking drove her mad at times. It's just what made her, her. If she was a bit honest, she was even a little over the top when it came to him. If this was anyone else she would never keep trying, never keep emailing, messaging, or calling and getting ignored. She would have said fuck it and moved on, but she couldn't not with him. And if he was honest he felt the same way, he tried to stay away but he had to give in and answer her. He missed and wanted her just as badly. There was something here that they never shared with anyone else.
He needed to get over his fears, he needed to let go and just be with her the way they should be. God brought them together, and he knew he shouldn't fight it. If she was willing to do all this, he was willing to give it a try, he needed to see where this would go just as badly as she did.
They could either have everything they ever wanted, or crumble like the past relationships, but either way, it was worth a shot. They would never know otherwise, and neither wanted to go another 28 years of wondering what could have been?
Joe knew it was time to see what happens now? Would he get the girl of his dreams? Would he have the life he wanted so badly? He hoped so, and so did she. At least if nothing else, they loved each other dearly, and it was mutual, that was the difference from the start!