Deeana thinks about a lot of things Joe brought up in their conversation, mostly if they didn't work? And she would end up alone, would she regret it? Joe didn't realize she was already alone, she has been for years. She didn't depend on Phill for anything, she was always in charge of things, making decisions, and making things happen if need be. Phil wasn't the type to confide in or talk to. He would always jump to conclusions or make things a ton worse.
He wasn't any support for her, and if she was honest, she hasn't been one for him either in a long time. They drifted apart on everything, bit by bit. They had nothing but their children, and now not even they were holding them together. Deeana saw there was no point, the kids were growing up, doing their own thing. They would have their own life and she would be stuck with Phill. That thought hurt her more and more.
The thought of her never really knowing what real love was hurt her as well, was this all there was for her? And Why? She loved Joe, wanted him, in every way. She just hoped he would go for it, she knew he had his reservations. She didn't think as he did, if they didn't work, she gave it a try, saw what it was all about, was with the man she always wanted to be with. It was worth it. Also, she had more faith in them, hoping they would work. She still felt they were meant, and hell even if they weren't, she still wanted to give it a shot.
Joe still wondering about everything, he sees that she emails him, during the day, still wanting all this. He doesn't answer during the day, doing his thing with work.
At night, he sees she emails again, so he emails back trying not to be in his head, trying to keep his word to her, that he would answer. Just he is tired and still in his head so he only stays a few minutes, and drifts off to sleep.
Deeana sees he kept his word and is happy with that, she is getting to know how Joe is with this. She emails the next day, and texts trying to keep things going, but this time he doesn't answer.
She writes to him telling him not to worry and get into his head, to trust her, and to just give them a chance. She writes the whole week, trying to stay close to him, trying to get him to open up. She just sees he is off in quiet mode again. She now knows this is part of him, and she isn't going anywhere. Just at the end of the week, she sees, she needs to give space, and stop so she does. She knows in her heart he will message back again, he will be back. Something in the back of her mind and heart always tells her that.
Joe, on the other hand, sees all the emails, and pictures, he knows she won't let go of this. He just wants her to be sure of this, so she doesn't get hurt. He sees just how much she really does want him, how she is fighting for this. He still can't believe it, He just hopes that she is thinking clearly and not blinded by things.
He fears that the real him, she won't really like. He has all kinds of fears, at the same time, he wants this even more than she does. Her sexy pictures not helping the cause at all. He still jerks off to her, wanting her, wishing she was there to really touch, and he knows he can have her.
He keeps thinking about it, and he knows a lot of what she said was right, they were both adults. They both really wanted this. At least they could say they tried. These things keep going round and round in his mind.
He will go to her, he will give in to her, he just needs to get the courage to do this. How much longer could he fight her, when he wanted the same? How much longer would she stick around, if he kept doing this? He just sees that she is determined to get his attention and him. He just doesn't want to be a big let down to her. Not realizing she likes him just as he is. She isn't perfect either. She kept reminding him of that, he thinks about it, just his past relationship stands in his way as well.
He didn't want a repeat, he didn't want to get hurt, at the same time he didn't want Deeana hurt. He just sees this hurts her as well, and he needs to make his choice and go for it. Giving them both what they need and want.