Jake sat at the table stunned by everything his wife had just said. The rest of his family sat there stunned by the outburst, then felt guilty. Everything Sammy said was true. She had been neglected and badly. The silence carried on for several minutes while the adults thought about what to do when it was broken by Gracie.
“Daddy, what is sex?”
“Later Gracie,” Mike said, “Jake what is going on?”
Jake was stunned and told them everything he knew and as he talked he realized how wrong he had been. Everything she had said was true and he felt awful! She kept taking the hits from him and he just expected her to deal with it, with no concern for her. She had been through enough the past two years, how much more could she bare?
“Where did Momma go?” Gracie asked.
“She just went to get some sleep and relax a little,” Abby said, “Why don’t I take you into the living room and you can watch a movie while you eat?”
Gracie never got to do that and jumped at the chance. Abby was back in a few minutes and asked, “It is a good question, where would Sammy go?”
Jake shrugged, “I don’t know if she would go to Kev and Ashley’s or Derek’s or even Kate’s. I just don’t know and since she doesn’t have her phone, I have no idea what to think!”
Sammy drove crying for a good hour, before exhaustion started to set in. She stopped at a hotel not far from where she was, checked in, stripped down to her bra and underwear, pulled the covers over her head and closed her eyes and fell into a deep sleep.
Emily followed Jake home to help him get the kids in bed. They went down the stairs to the living room and sat on the couch resting for just a second.
“I really couldn’t have fucked this up any more if I tried, could I?” Jake asked.
Emily smiled sadly, “That’s not for me to say Jake. I just know that you two need to talk and figure this out. I love you both and I know you both have been through a lot together, so just talk. You owe each other that much.”
Jake nodded, “Thanks Sis for listening and for helping get the kids in bed.”
Emily went over and kissed his cheek, “No problem. I’ll talk to you tomorrow. If you need anything call me, ok?”
Jake nodded and walked her to the door and watched as she walked to her car and drove away. He nobbled back in his boot and traction to the stairs, locking up as he went. He changed into a pair of shorts and checked his phone to see if Sammy had called or left a message, then remembered that she didn’t have a phone. There was nothing and he just prayed that she was ok.
Sammy woke late in the morning and was shocked by how well she slept. She felt her breasts engorged from not feeding Aiden overnight. She went in the shower and turned on the hot water and squeezed to release the pressure. She felt better after the shower then ordered some room service. She was starving after not eating much the day before. She gorged herself with waffles with strawberries and whipped cream, eggs, sausage and fresh squeezed orange juice while sitting in the fluffy robe, thinking.
She loved Jake, truly and deeply. He was the only one for her, but somehow she got lost in everything they had endured. She felt totally disrespected and more like a maid, than a partner. And not loved and appreciated in the least bit. And she had no idea how to change that. She got dressed and checked out, but before she went home, she went on a walk around a park that they frequented.
Jake had Aiden down for a nap and Gracie doing some homework as he watched the Sunday games that were on. It was still something that was a sore subject for him, how it ended, but he was accepting it. He had another conference call scheduled with his therapist and they would talk about it tomorrow.
Jake felt terrible for how he had acted over the last few months. Sammy was right on all of it and when he thought back to the night he had basically forced her into sleeping with him, he felt even worse. He had to do something to make it up to the woman he loved, he just didn’t know how. He had some ideas and was going to start first thing in the morning. Now all he needed was for his wife to come home.
Jake heard the garage door open when he heard the side door open and closed. Gracie jumped off the couch and ran into the entryway. Jake let them have a minute together as he stood up and waited by the furniture. She came in and he felt a little like someone punched him in the stomach at the thought that he might lose her. That was not something that he was ok with in the slightest.
“Hi…” Sammy said.
“Hi Baby,” He replied.
They stood there a few minutes and looked at each other until Aiden started fussing, “Oh I’ll get him. I need to nurse and pump.”
Jake nodded and smiled a little, “He wasn’t really pleased that I didn’t have the right equipment…”
Sammy nodded and went up to his room while Jake and Gracie stayed downstairs. Sammy came back down about an hour later with Aiden and placed him on the floor to stretch out.
“Sammy, I have a lasagna in the oven for dinner if that’s ok…” Jake said, “I picked up one from that health food store that you like.”
Sammy nodded, “Thanks I appreciate that. Do you want to talk after Gracie goes to bed?”
“I think that would be good,” Jake nodded.
They worked cautiously side by side getting dinner ready and getting Gracie ready for school. Gracie packed her own snacks and put her homework in her backpack before hopping in the bath. Sammy braided her hair wet and let her sleep in them to have wavy hair for the next day. Sammy got Aiden bathed, fed and in bed shortly after. She went into their bedroom to change clothes and found Jake sitting on the couch in their massive master suite, waiting for her.
She sat in the chair next to the couch and pulled her knees up to her chest and waited. Neither knew what to say, but Jake started it.
“Samantha, I want to apologize for my behavior over the last few weeks. I know it couldn’t have been easy and I am just so sorry that I didn’t think about how you were dealing with this,” Jake started.
“I’m sorry too Jake and that I reacted the way I did to everything. I know that you have struggled with how your career ended. It wasn’t fair and I get that. But I felt like your punching bag, taking on all of your emotions on top of everything else for our family. And it appeared that there was no end in sight,” Sammy said.
“I get that now Sammy. I promise I do! I will do whatever I need to make this right. I love you!” He said earnestly.
“Thank you Jake. I appreciate that. I do love you too…” She said.
“Why do I sense a but coming?” Jake said, feeling the pit growing in his stomach again.
“No not a but necessarily. But what happened the other night can NEVER happen again!” She started then sobbed, “I felt so used and cheap! You have never made me feel like that before and I didn’t know what to do! Every time we have been together, from the very first time in high school, you have always made me feel beautiful, sexy, desired and respected. And that’s saying a lot for a high school kid, but Thursday… I felt like a cheap whore!”
Jake heard the emotion in her voice and felt even worse than he did before, “Fuck, Sammy I had no idea. I’m so sorry!! That will never happen again! I swear to you!”
She nodded, “Thank you for that. I think I just need some time and remember me and take some time for me.”
“So what do you need?” Jake asked.
“I would like to get a nanny a couple of days a week so I can take care of things at the ranch,” Sammy explained, “I have found an agency that I think might work.”
“That sounds good to me Sammy, whatever you need,” Jake assured her.
She smiled slightly at him, “Thanks Jake…”
“There was something else I wanted to bring up to you. I was talking with my Dad yesterday and while I am studying for the Bar, I would like to work with him at his office as like his law clerk to give me some more hands on experience. It would just be a few hours in the afternoon. I have PT in the mornings, but would like to try this. Is that ok?” He asked.
Sammy sighed, “And how does your family fit into this? You seem to have it all figured out and are now just telling me. You aren’t really asking.”
“I don’t mean it to sound like that, honestly. I will wait if you want me to, I don’t mind,” Jake stammered.
“This is what I mean Jake. You and your Dad just went ahead and planned this, then came to me! You didn’t take the house schedule into account at all! You just assumed that I would fall into line with whatever! I hate to break it to you, but you are not the MVP and can do whatever you want here! I’m not one of your rookies that will carry your helmet and jock strap!!” Sammy cried.
“I never thought that-“ Jake started.
“Just please be honest!! You know you thought that I would just do whatever and you wouldn’t have to worry about it! What happened to the man that you were when Aiden was born? Who did the laundry and took Gracie to school and I never had to ask for anything? And I know you have been injured and couldn’t move well, but your attitude is so different!”
Jake hung his head, “You are right Sammy, and I didn’t take you into consideration at all with this plan. I just thought you would keep on with the way things were. I took you for granted and I am so sorry Baby!”
Wiping the tears from her face, “Thank you for admitting it,” She said then got up and started walking to the closet.
“Where are you going?” Jake asked.
“Sammy we haven’t finished talking!” He cried.
“I have. I have said what I need to for now. Good night Jake,” She said and went into the massive walk-in closet and changed into some pajamas and went to bed, turning her nightstand lamp off. Jake could do nothing but stand there, unsure of what his next move was. All he knew was that he felt his marriage disintegrating before his eyes and was powerless to stop it.