My pregnancy was a tough one considering I didn't have my mate with me. Or a mate at all. When a she wolf is rejected or has no mate, her pregnancy is automatically much harder because she doesn't have anyone else to rely on which leads to implications in the pregnancy.
Luckily me and my baby made it out healthy but my biggest worry is that being near humans could potentially maybe give her some long term damage? I hope not because, if anything happened to my baby I'd have no reason to live.
This entire change of environment after what had happened to me, was because of Elora, she became my entire reason to live. A reason to thrive and survive and live to see the light. Had I not gotten pregnant with Elora, I might not be on this planet right now.
Sure I had days where I thought I had messed up my life by being mateless and pregnant, but I'm so glad those thoughts went as quickly as they came. When I first laid eyes on my beautiful pup Elora, my heart swelled with such pride. She had her fathers eyes and hair but other than that she looked just like me. It scared me, sometimes when she looked up at me it felt like a mini girl version of you know who giving me sass.
Nevertheless she's the cutest soul you'll ever meet. Another worry I had was that I wouldn't be able to raise her properly but with all due praise to the Moon Goddess, my little Elora has the kindest personality ever. I hope her sweet trait of kindness isn't ever used against her.
She's in school right now, and I'm trying to get work done but I have zero motivation. Stella called earlier in the day, she said Mia is planning to throw a surprise party for my parents' wedding anniversary and that I needed to come.
Of course, I said no. Dmitri could be there and I don't want to hurt myself by being in his presence. But Stella quite clearly clarified that he wouldn't be there. Which makes me wonder if I should go back. This seems like a great opportunity, one that shouldn't be missed out on.
Elora needs to know her family.
"Amore mio, would you like to visit your grandparents?"
Never in my life have I ever seen such confusion. My poor discombobulated child just stared up at me as if I spoke alien.
"Grandparents?" To be fair, the last time she saw them, was at her third birthday party. Which was two years ago. I don't blame her for not remembering.
"Yeah sweetie, grandma and grandpa." From the tiny shelf above the fireplace, I picked up a picture of mum and dad with three year old Elora but she still didn't recognise them very well.
"They love you very much sweetheart, and we're going to see them soon!" Elora just smiled and went back to eating. Normally she was very chatty but today she was a bit quieter because of her confusion as to who 'grandma and grandpa' were.
She sat down and put Moana on. For the gazillion-th time. At this point I could definitely write down the script entirely from memory whilst also being blindfolded. I let her watch whilst I group called my support group.
Hazel had given me information about one of her friends, who led a support group here. I was urged to join and although I ignored their invitations in the first few months, after Elora was born I needed the help.
The support group was online nowadays since there's a highly contagious virus called covid-19 going around. Schools are still open though, as if the virus skips kids. As if the virus would say to them; "Can't infect you- you're a school kid." Humans and their stupidity, anyways, everyone joined and the session began.
There's something I've noticed about the human world- division. There is so much divide. They don't care for their species if they don't meet their specific criteria. For example, did you know there's something called racism?? Some white humans hate black or brown humans even though they're all still very much humans. And you can be white and still hated if you're not from a specific country! And did you know they also hate each other for their beliefs?? Humans are strange beings. It's ironic I say that, considering us werewolves aren't perfect and all, but humans are much worse. No doubt about that.
"Welcome to the session everyone! We have two new people joining us today; Nadia and Kyle."
The support group was open to all; alcoholics, single parents, hate crime victims, and basically anyone who had ever gone through something bad.
Anyways, the session was a more depressing one today. Some of the stuff people shared really shocked me; how could one being do such horrid stuff to another? There's no point in me acting all confused though- considering my own mate rejected me. Humans have none of that mate bond stuff, but my predetermined mate rejected me.
"Bedtime Elora!" I hollered up the stairs waiting for her to come upstairs. My princess was taking her sweet time in doing so too, and I needed to hurry and get her to bed because I vaguely remember Knox having sent me a voice message saying he needed to tell me something. Which means I need to hurry up and get the munchkin off to bed so that I can call Knox and see what's up.
"Book. Pwease." I really was hoping she wouldn't want to read a book today, I was so sick and tired of the same three storybooks she always read. I've bought this girl probably a whole library of children's books and yet she always reads the same three; The Beauty and The Beast, Brave and The Frog Princess.
"Just one, okay?" She nodded and I was glad she didn't abuse her puppy eyes face. Elora knows I can never say no to her when she gives me those puppy eyes.
Anyways she dozed off pretty quickly, so I speedily tidied up the living room, put her toys away and all and called Knox.
"Hey Knox! What are you all doing?"
"Hey Ari...listen..." Knox sounded like he was about to burst into tears and my heart broke at the thought of my baby brother crying.
"Knox what's wrong?"
"I mean...at this point you should ask what's right because what's not wrong right now..."
"Knox. Stop speaking in riddles. And tell me what is going on."
"What happened to dad?!"
"Well...there was a rogue attack recently...not even at the borders but fully inside pack territory. Dad had gone to get something from the town square and that's where the rogue scene unfolded."
"How is he? Is he okay?!"
"He's really brave, you know. Stepped in to save the life of a she wolf and her pup. And he..."
"Knox what happened to dad!?!" At this point I was sobbing. The thought of anything happening to my parents is one that I cannot bear.
"Well he received several scratch wounds...the pack doctor said that they could be fatal. The wolves that attacked him had their claws laced with wolfbane and a much stronger type of silver."
By now I was relentlessly bawling my eyes out at the thought of my poor father being so badly injured and hurt by those filthy, disgusting rogues.
"Ari you and Elora need to come and see him. He keeps saying he doesn't know if he'll survive or not. We all need to be near him."
"Knox if anyone finds out about Elora-"
"I won't let them. I've already booked your tickets for this morning actually. It's in five hours so please make a start on packing. See you soon big sis. Love you, miss you, bye." With that Knox cut the call and I knew he probably cried afterwards.
For a second I let the horrific information really settle in; dad had been attacked in a recent rogue attack and his health was deteriorating. My poor father, I could only hope and pray that he would recover. Knox's voice sounded so utterly broken and upset that I knew I needed to act fast. Since Knox had already booked me and Elora’s flights, I packed Elora's bag and my own bag and for some reason, couldn't sleep despite how tired I was earlier on in the day.
Dad has always been such a strong figure, so brave and all the while never falling victim to an injury or an illness. And yet his condition right now is terrible. My poor father, the Moon Goddess better keep him in our lives.
All I can do is hope he’s better. I can’t keep losing people.