1. Dream come true
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It was as if his vision was penetrating the fabric of my clothes. The intensity of his gaze making me feel uncomfortable.
Why was he so intimidating?
His dark gray eyes seemed unreal, a demanding sheen illuminating them. In his presence, I felt uneasy, unlike myself, like I was made of fire instead of flesh. I couldn’t help but gawk at him like a fool. It was something I grew accustomed to doing when I was around him. I wondered if he ever noticed it.
“Alex, did you restock the yogurt we spoke about?” He asked me seriously, yet I couldn’t bring myself to think about yogurt. My work in his small shop seemed insignificant when I was in his presence; enchanted by him. He kept staring at me, awaiting a response.
Finally, I found my voice, “You know I do all you ever ask of me.” I bit my lip, remembering how I dreamed of his exposed body last night. Under the shower, the steam concealed his broad shoulders, abs and behind. Drops of water slid down his almost jet black hair, rolling down his perfect face, neck, chest and abdomen, traveling further down.
“That is what I like to hear. You can go now. The store is empty and your shift ended twenty minutes ago.” My boss said, but I thought I saw an unasked question in his eyes.
Was he wondering what I was thinking about? Was my face showing my thoughts in some way? Or maybe he left something unsaid?
I turned around, feeling his gaze still on me. As I began walking through the door the sleeve of my shirt got stuck in the door handle. It halted my steps, tearing my uniform from the shoulder. I looked back, embarrassed. To my surprise, he was already walking towards me.
“I’m sorry, boss. I will have it repaired immediately, or I’ll pay for a new one.” I apologized for my clumsiness.
He stayed silent, looking at my sleeve. Then gently grabbed my arm and pulled me closer to him to inspect the tear. I gasped at our new-found proximity. His eyes were fixated on my arm. He moved his hand slowly, gliding one finger up my elbow to my shoulder to form a line, leaving a fiery trail against my skin. My breathing changed in response, his gaze shifted to my eyes and then my lips. I was frozen in my place, forgetting how to move.
“Maybe you don’t need to get it fixed.” He said finally. He lifted his other hand, grazing my lips with his thumb. “It seems to look better on you when you’re showing more skin.”
I stared at his lips with desire, wondering what they would taste like. I had yearned to taste him for so long.
When he noticed that I was not stopping him in any way, he swiftly pressed his body against mine, making me stagger in my steps until my back hit the hard wall. With one hand on my waist, he tucked away loose strands of my hair behind my ear with his other hand.
“I always thought you are so beautiful.” He whispered in my ear.
Could it be? Was this really happening or was I dreaming again? Whatever it was, I was not stopping it.
“You did?” I asked, my voice shaking.
He didn’t answer, instead I felt his warm breath lingering from my ear to my neck. His lips almost grazing my skin. He was so tall and irresistible. I could not control myself any longer. I buried my hands into his dark brown hair and pulled him closer. His hand slithered down my waist, sneaking into my jeans, gently grabbing a handful of my butt.
Not wasting any time, huh?
It was a depiction of my dreams morphing into reality. He created a small space between us, enough for him to be able to look into my astonished and lustful eyes.
“Yes, I still do. You never saw this coming?” He answered my question, I was so consumed by him I had almost forgotten that I asked a question.
I shook my head, “No.”
My imagination had always played so many scenarios of us, but never once had I imagined that they would come true. Michael was my boss, and he had never made any moves on me nor did he ever point me in such a direction. It was typical for me to observe him when he did his paperwork or when I helped him stock the store. I would habitually watch him as he would reach up to stack items, his abs becoming visible for me to admire alongside his tight ass cheeks. But it was all in my head.
In my dreams we were always naked and I would barely be wearing any clothes for him to remove. It must have been reality then, because I was surely wearing too many layers as I stood before him. Michael too, he looked like pure perfection, wearing a sea blue button-up shirt and what seemed to be his favorite black jeans, yet at that moment I hated his clothes for creating a barrier between us.
I began unbuttoning his shirt, revealing his bare chest. Butterflies fluttered in my belly as he just stared at me. His hands started moving slowly on the edge of my jean shorts and when I finally touched his abs, his fingers began moving upwards under my uniform shirt directly towards my bra. I moaned and rested my head on the wall behind me, grabbing the sea blue fabric of his shirt to pull him closer. He leaned in to set fire to the skin on my neck with a kiss.
His lips moved down to my collarbone and lingered there for a while. However, I could tell that he was hesitating, as if I would stop him from continuing.
“What?” I gasped.
Suddenly, he retreated away from me. My body started to ache, feeling the distance he created. His head was bent down like he was ashamed.
Was he? Was it that bad to be with me? Couldn’t be that. He was way too polite. Maybe he was being shy? It must have been that, right?
“I am sorry... I was always... I never did...” He turned his back to me and started walking towards his office.
It took me a minute to gather myself. I was still leaning against the wall where he left me; my shirt wrinkled, my breathing heavy and my thoughts scattered. I had to know what stopped him. If he was afraid of what people might think or what I might think of him – there was nothing to fear, at least in my perspective. I had to explain that to him before things got more awkward.
I straighten my creased uniform, swallowed my desire – which was something I had gotten used to doing for the past year – and went after him.
As I walked through the door, I started rambling, “Boss, I am not ashamed of anything. You see, I...” His bloodshot eyes stopped me.
Was he going to cry or something? What was going on?
When I entered the room he was holding his face in his palms with his elbows resting on the desk in front of him. He lifted his eyes to look at me as I began talking, but only for a brief moment, after which he averted his gaze. I stood, dumbfounded. I wasn’t expecting him to be sad.
Was he that sorry?
“Boss?” I asked, my voice was a mere whisper. That was all I could say. My mind went blank.
What was I supposed to say? Was it so bad...what we almost did?
A moment passed as I struggled to find the right words to say, meanwhile, Michael sat with a mortified countenance, his gaze glued to a small souvenir placed on his desk.
At last, he spoke, albeit, without looking at me, “I don’t want you to quit your job because of this. I promise that I will not bother you like that again.”
He thought I would quit because of this? It was all I ever daydreamed about for so long. What bothered me more was that we didn’t continue what we had just started. He had no girlfriend, I was just hooking up with random strangers at bars; we both were free. I didn’t understand why he was acting like that.
So what if we are coworkers? Yes, he is my boss, but why did that matter?
“Why would I quit? You did nothing that I did not want.” I told him.
He shot me a dark look with his gray eyes. I could have sworn that I saw raw passion still burning inside them, but he was hesitant to act on it.
“You wanted that?” The astonishment was clear in his voice.
“Yes, I did. What made you think otherwise?” I voiced with confidence.
Michael looked at me for a few seconds like he was about to say something or finally explain his strange reaction, but then shifted his gaze back towards that damn souvenir. I moved a little in my place, feeling uncomfortable.
What was with this silence?
“Anyway, don’t say anything about this to anyone!” He said coldly but then added, “Please.”
All my dreams felt so distant, I could hardly label what was happening as a dream, it was more like a nightmare. The conversation was over, at least for that moment. I nodded, not that he could see me since he wasn’t even looking at me.
“I will not say a thing, like nothing ever happened,” I said with a sigh, then turned around and left the room.
I guess I will just continue dreaming about him.
My dreams were bound to become even more intense, especially since my body had finally felt the warmth of his touch.