#29 Poor girl
Now that Dshawn and I are on the same page about the physical part of our relationship and we both made it very clear to Aston that he should keep his big mouth shut about me, it’s almost scary how easy it is to be with Dshawn. We don’t fight, we don’t even bicker. Because of our conflicting work schedules we don’t get to hang out as much as we’d like, but I spend most nights at his apartment and when I have a late shift he always tries to pick me up.
I’m actually quite surprised by how easy it is for me to stop seeing other people. I thought that I might have a hard time to say no to a booty call or someone sliding into my DMs, but I honestly just ignore them without any trouble whatsoever. Dshawn doesn’t get insecure about my past anymore, mostly because we actually talk about things that bother us now, not that there is much to discuss.
Honestly, I worry more about Francesca than about myself, and that is a first for both of us. Fran and Aston are still fucking, and from the way she looks at him when she thinks no one is watching, she likes him more than she should. On one of my rare nights off I decide to cancel my plans to curl up with Dshawn on his couch and invite Fran over to watch a reality show we both love to make fun of. She shows up with a bottle of wine and changes into sweats and a T-shirt so she’ll be more comfortable. I’m already in my pajamas, curled up with a cup of tea. I’m not feeling like drinking tonight, so I just watch Franny drink glass after glass of wine, her cheeks turning more flushed with every sip.
“Franny…” I sigh and pause the show we’re watching. “Are you okay? You seem… off.”
She rolls her eyes at me. “Girl, you’re the one who suddenly got all boring. Since when do you spend your nights on the couch with a cup of tea? Dshawn’s got you acting like a married lady.”
She’s deflecting and she knows it, so I don’t bother responding to her snide remark. “How’s your arrangement with Aston going?”
She immediately tenses, taking another gulp of her wine. “Great. Saw him last night and we’re meeting up again tomorrow night.”
“What exactly does that mean, meeting up?” I ask, putting down my now empty cup of tea and adjusting the blanket that’s covering my legs.
Francesca rolls her eyes again. “You know perfectly well what it means. We text each other to come over, we fuck, and then the person who came over goes back to their own apartment. Last week, we actually met up at a club and had sex in the bathroom before each going our separate ways.”
“And you’re okay with that?” I ask, not missing the barely concealed longing in her voice. Poor girl.
“Why do you keep asking me about Aston?” she says with an annoyed grunt. “We both know the guy is the biggest player ever. He’s not even trying to hide that. I just like having sex with him.”
“But you also hang out with him, right?” I want to make sure that she’s really doing okay, so I push her some more. “Dshawn told me that he once came over to Aston’s place to find you asleep on the couch, your head in Aston’s lap. That doesn’t sound like just sex to me.”
“I was tired from him keeping me up all night,” she bites out, really getting aggravated now. “And yeah, we sometimes hang out to watch a movie or something. We’re friends-with-benefits. You’re his friend too, aren’t you? So surely you know that he’s fun to be around, always joking around and making stupid remarks that I just can’t help but crack up about. Is it so wrong to actually spend some time with the guy that I’m currently sleeping with?”
“No,” I assure her, “it’s not, but I just think… He’s not going to change, Fran. He’s still sleeping with other girls. I’d hate for you to get hurt.”
She freezes complete, clenching her wine glass so tightly that her knuckles turn white. “He… he’s s-sleeping with other g-girls? St-still?” she stammers, hurt evident in her voice. “Even though he and I fuck at least four times a week?”
“Yes,” I say, hating that I have to be the one to tell her this. I need her to know what she’s gotten herself into before she gets in too deep. This isn’t going to end well for her if she falls for him. I know Aston and he has no idea that Fran feels this way. If he did, he would cut her off immediately. “He texted me a picture of his latest conquest this morning.” I pull out my phone and show her a picture of some random girl’s boobs. I have no idea why Aston thinks I’m interested in a texts like that, but he sometimes seems to forget that I’m not one of his player buddies, even though he often treats me like one of the guys.
“This morning?” Fran asks, her lower lips trembling. “But… I was over at his place last night! Why would he already need someone else?”
“Oh, honey…” I move over to her and take the glass out of her hands so she won’t spill wine all over herself. Her hands are trembling uncontrollably. “Come here.”
She throws herself into me, finally giving into the tears that were pricking behind her eyes from the moment we started talking about Aston. I stroke her back while she sobs. Her sadness is probably partially because she can be a bit of an emotional drunk, especially when she’s drinking an entire bottle of chardonnay on her own – wine makes her a little crybaby – but the feelings are real.
“You like him, don’t you?” I ask softly.
She nods against my shoulder, sniffling. “I think… I think I may be falling for him, even. And I know that it’s stupid and that he’ll never settle down with me, but I just…” She grunts. “How did I let this happen, Shaughna? How the fuck did I develop feelings for Aston Johnson, the proudest and biggest player in the whole world?”
“Like you said, he’s fun to be around,” I tell her, stroking her hair. “And I’m sorry for hurting you, honey. I shouldn’t have pushed you so much, but I just needed you to admit it. I don’t want you to keep hurting yourself like this. You’ve been off for weeks now.”
She pulls back a little and gives me a sad smile. “You see everything, don’t you? And I get it, I know I had to hear it, but it just… It was so much easier being in denial. Because now…” She sighs and wipes at her eyes. “Now I have to stop sleeping with him, or I’ll end up crying over that stupid boy every single night. Fuck!” She picks up a pillow and throws it across the room. “He’s the best I’ve ever had, Shaughna. He is massive and he knows exactly how to get me off. And his stamina… damn… four times in one night is not uncommon.”
“Four times?” I repeat. Bloody hell, I knew Aston liked sex, and I’m a fan of more than one round myself, but four times? That is a lot, especially when he does that on a regular basis and he’s sleeping with more girls than just Francesca. “And… just how massive are we talking?”
She giggles, sounding a bit more like herself now that we’re talking about sex instead of feelings. “So big that he almost won’t fit. And I know that it’s not something every girl likes, but damn, I like my dicks big and he’s got one hell of a penis, Shaughna. It’s just… Hmm…”
I laugh at the way she rolls her eyes back into her head. “Are you falling for him, or just his penis?”
“Both!” she exclaims, pushing me teasingly. “What I like most about him is that he’s up for anything. In the bedroom, of course, but also in regular life. When I ask him to go do something, he just does it, without even thinking about it. We went to one of those indoor skydiving places last week and he was so excited, jumping around like a little boy. He’s got so much joy in him… And right after, when we were both still high on the adrenaline, he drove us into the woods on his motorcycle and we had sex against a tree. I mean…” She shakes her head, laughing. “Who does that?”
“Aston,” I say with a little smile. I completely understand what she’s saying. His easy-going nature and youthful excitement are exactly why we’re friends. It’s why he’s got many, many friends, and also many, many girls lining up to sleep with him. He’s a great person, but he’s just not boyfriend material and he doesn’t want to be.
“I know I need to stop this,” she says, getting sad again. “I know. I just… do I just cut things off? Or do I tell him?”
“Depends… will you regret it if you don’t?”
She thinks about that for a moment. “I’m not sure. I already know that he’ll be freaked and tell me that this wasn’t the deal, and then things will get awkward between us. So maybe I should just let it go, but… part of me will always wonder…”
“Just sleep on it,” I advise her. “And whatever you do, I’m here for you.”
“Thanks.” She snuggles against me for a moment, letting me comfort her some more. “You’re a good friend, Shaughna. Don’t tell Aston any of this, okay? I know he’s your friend too, but-”
“He won’t hear anything from me,” I assure her. I’d never betray Franny like that. Besides, after the part Aston played in getting Dshawn to doubt me, I’m not going to give him any information. I’m with Fran on this. I won’t let whatever happens between them change my friendship with either of them, but I do know that Fran will need me more than Aston will when this all blows up in their faces.
We put the reality show back on and make fun of the contestants, but Fran doesn’t go back to her usual chipper self. Poor, poor girl.