Whole way to my office I thought about her, no matter how hard I tried but I was not able to divert my mind away from her thoughts. So many questions crossed my mind “why she is addicted to medicine? Why did she rest her head on my shoulder? Does she remember me? After all this time why did she ended up in my center? Is it some kind of signal from God to make her mine?” So many questions but answers to these questions were unknown.
I parked my car outside the company and sat on the car for long time. I was so lost in her thought that I jolted when someone knocked on the window. As I glanced at the window I saw Baca my secretary standing outside the car. I got out of the car.
“Good morning, sir. Is everything alright?” she asked.
“Morning…” I replied hesitantly walking inside.
“You seem stressed. Is there anything I can help?” she asked following me behind.
“I am fine. Just get me my coffee” I said and got on the lift.
“Sure, I will be at your office in a minute” she said and walked towards cafeteria.
I absently walked towards my office not greeting back my staff which I usually used to do. As soon as I was inside my office I plonked on my chair and turned it around, towards the picture window which had the view of city.
The view which gave me so much positive vibes and let my heart to ease was now not enough to calm my heart down. I was in same place; same time with same view ahead of me but the person sitting here was entirely different.
He was not the person who took deep breath and got lost in his work right after he entered the office like any other day. He was not the person who didn’t give his past any chance to hit his emotional spot inside his office. But now he was so lost in reveries that only knock on his door made him land back to his office.
“Come in” I said and turned my chair towards my desk.
Baca entered holding the cup carefully on her hand. “I brought you your coffee just the way you like black and strong” she said keeping it on my table.
“Thank you” I said staring at the coffee cup.
“Is there anything else?” asked Baca.
“No, you can leave” I said turning the file on my desk.
“Are you sure you don’t …”
“Will you please stop irritating me and leave?” I said in cold tone which made Baca instantly turn around and leave in hesitant manner.
I glanced at the coffee she brought for some time and turned my chair back to the window and continued looking at the view. I didn’t want to work anymore. I just want to run back to her and hug her tight. I didn’t want to lose this chance like the last time. I really, really wanted to make her mine in this life. A life which had everything except her but sadly that is not possible at all as she is wife of someone else now.
“Sir Clients are here”
The sudden voice of Mandy startled me. I turned towards him with my furious expression but before I could say anything he hurriedly spoke out “I… I knocked twice but you didn’t give any respond so I thought to come in. As it is urgent Clients are desperately waiting you at the conference hall.”
“I…. I don’t want to attend this meeting” I said feeling irritated.
He glanced at me with concern in his eyes and asked “Is everything alright? Baca was saying you didn’t seem good today. You look lost.”
Rubbing my temples I said “I am just having a headache.”
“I can help to deal with the Clients sir. You just be present there otherwise they might think that we are taking them lightly and didn’t want the deal with them” he said trying to persuade me.
I thought for a while and nodded.
I took a deep breath before entering the hall. Everyone was already inside and they greeted me politely. I greeted them back and sat on my chair. I glanced at Mandy when he nodded his head gesturing he was all set I spoke out.
“Well thank you everyone for being here. I am glad you want to work with our company. It is really a big thing for our company. So to explain about the deal further I want my staff Mandy to present his presentation.”
When everyone focused on Mandy he got up and started to explain everything. Though he was speaking out but I was not able to hear him. I was just hearing James. The things he said back then echoed on my ear one after another.
“Everything will be alright soon, don’t worry honey”
”God knows how to deal with this dumb people she is so difficult person. If I knew it before and her parents didn’t lie about her then I would have never married a dumb.”
“I did it so many times I have hid all the medicine even threw them all but god knows from where she gets them back. I took her everywhere….”
“They say they cannot help…”
“Your centre is my only hope”
“I would have never married a dumb.”
All the words of James made me realize that he didn’t love Lisa. He was just into the marriage but didn’t love her. Maybe that was the reason she was depressed, maybe her marriage didn’t provided her the comfort and love which she was seeking for.
“Bravo… bravo…” when everyone clapped I came back to my sense that I was actually in a meeting.
Soon the meeting ended with deal being signed. Everyone praised Mandy for his presentation. I too appreciated his work and thanked him for his work. I then walked back to my office.
As more time passed more desperate I got. So late in the afternoon I got out of the office and thought to go back to center and check on Lisa. But as I got on my car and was all set to go a thought crossed my mind reminding me that she was only a patient to me now not more than that. I started my car and head back to my apartment with same desperate heart to see her.
I got inside my lifeless apartment. I thought to take a shower and freshen up so that it can help. But standing beneath the shower for an hour nothing happened I was same desperate Steven.
I came out of the washroom and plonked on the couch. I leaned my back and watched the ceiling thinking about almost everything related to Lisa. I don’t know when I fall asleep.
When I open my eyes I found myself on a couch. I looked around it was already dark. I got up and switched on the light. I went to the kitchen thinking to prepare something to eat but I stood near the gas for long time not deciding what to cook just absently watching the flame.
I walked to the balcony and watched the city lit up in light. I so badly wanted to see her but something was stopping me. Just one reason I was trying to find out to go and see her. I was totally lost somewhere and when I came back to my sense fighting back to my thoughts I picked up the keys and got out of my apartment. Just once I wanted to see her from distance calm down my heart like the days in past. I got on the car and drove towards the center.
As I got inside the gate I heard a scream. I was shocked and ran inside. I saw manager Arvin in the hall and walking towards him I asked “whose scream was that?”
Arvin in shock glanced at me and said “I was just about to call you sir. It’s the lady admitted today.”
“You mean the girl addicted to medicine?” I asked in fright.
“Yeah…” as he just nodded another scream came. I was shocked hearing the scream coming from downstairs which was actually male section.
I glanced at Arvin and asked furiously “what is she doing downstairs?”
“I… I don’t know sir it was Rose….” His sentence was interrupted with another scream. So without waiting for his explanation I ran downstairs. Following her scream I reached the room where she was.
I opened the door and went inside. The room was dark so I switched on the light and saw Lisa sitting on the corner of the room hugging her knees. She slowly lifted her head up and glanced into my eyes. Her eyes were filled with fright. Seeing me she stood on her foot and ran towards me.
I had no idea why she was coming towards me but before I could conclude with a reason she hugged me tight. I went numb. The girl who I had loved since so long and was wife of someone else was right in my arms. I was totally stunned.