For a while I didn’t make any move and stood still trying to embrace that beautiful moment I have been waiting since so long. But it didn’t last long when I came back to my reality I pulled myself back. I gripped her arms and made her sit on the bed. My eyes fall on the plate full of rice which was kept at the side of her bed and in a second I got that she didn’t ate it.
I called Arvin and told him to get her something to eat. When he left I took out my cell phone and dialed Rose’s number.
“Hello” she answered in sleepy tone.
Trying my best to suppress my anger I said “Rose, why is she staying in male’s section?”
“She who?” she asked lazily.
“The one who got admitted today” I said taking long breath.
She yawned and said “Oh! She… actually the female section is all packed. So I thought…”
“Great you just thought and did without asking me. Great very great all other time you irritate me asking things you already know and the important things like this you ignore and really don’t bother to ask me” I was totally losing my mind.
“What was I supposed to do then? Female section is all packed up. Even I told you about it then what would you do? Will you take her to your home and keep?” her voice was furious.
“You know what that sounds great” I said and disconnected the call in anger.
I pinched the bridge of my nose trying to calm myself down walking back and forth in front of Lisa. After some time taking deep breath I called her “come with me.”
I walked out of the room and when I turned back I saw her retrieving a notebook from beneath the pillow. Holding it close to her chest she came out of the room. I walked upstairs and went to my office. I fetched the key from the drawer beneath my desk and walked to my office’s personal room.
It had been long I had not used that room. For some months after building up the centre I stayed there but when the work load increased at the company I moved to the apartment few distance away from my company. When Arvin came to my office with the food I asked him to send someone to clean the room.
“Eat it…” I said handing Lisa the plate but she ignored me. She was looking at the light for long time. I patted on her shoulder and took the spoon full of rice near her mouth.
Like obedient child she ate the food. When I feed her again she stopped and made me eat it. When I nodded no she pushed my hand towards my mouth. Probably, she was acting like a child and wanted me to eat with her. I had no other choice rather than eating with her. When I took the bite she glanced back at me. I made her eat another bite she obediently ate it. Seeing her behavior it was clear that she did took care of those who cared for her.
“The room is ready?” said cleaner coming out of the room.
“Thank you. You can rest now” I said him and took Lisa to the room.
I made her sleep on the bed and pulled the blanket over her body. I took my hand to switch off the lamp but she kept her hand on mine and shook her head gesturing ‘no.’
“So, she was afraid of dark” I withdrew my hand back “goodnight.”
Whole night I lied on the lounge and watched Lisa. I know it is not good watching someone else’s wife but no matter how hard I try I was not able to stay away from her. For me staring at her face was all enough I want nothing more than that.
Next morning before she got up I walked out of the centre and went back to my apartment. After quick shower I got ready and hooped into my car. I left for company in hurry but due to headache I was not able to drive fast.
When I reached company I went straight to my office. I sat on my seat and tried to focus on my work but the headache was growing sever. I pulled the drawer beneath my desk to fetch a medicine and suddenly something stroke my head.
“No, no… no” I rushed out of my office in hurry.
“Sir I was about to…” Baca voice went low to mute but I didn’t cared and ran inside the lift. I hurriedly pressed the button for numerous times until the door closed.
As soon as lift door open I ran towards my car fetching the key from my pocket. I hurriedly got inside the car and drove away. My heart was beating out so loud. My head which was about to explode with headache a few minutes ago was now filled with only one thought “please don’t let her pull that drawer. Please, please, please…”
I stopped my car outside the gate and rushed inside. As I ran towards my office Arvin came in my way saying “I was about to call you sir…”
“Arvin not now…” I said and ran inside my office and headed straight to the room where Lisa was.
As soon as I got inside stamping my feet hard on the floor Lisa startled and dropped the medicine from her hand. She was actually going to eat the medicine. I hurriedly pulled her away but she tried to pick the medicine from the ground.
“Arvin….” I called out.
He rushed inside and I asked him to collect all the medicine from the ground and from the drawer and take it outside the room. Well he was collecting the medicine Lisa still tried to break free from my grip and reach for the medicine. I tried to make her look away from the medicine but her gaze was fixed on every medicine which Arvin was picking.
“Lisa… look at me… Lisa look at me” I gripped her cheeks and tried to make her look at me. But she was not turning her face towards me.
“Lisa…” my loud voice was finally able to draw her attention towards me but she was not lifting her head and looking at me. I gently lifted her chin made her to look at me.
I saw tears rolling down her eyes. I gently wiped her tears saying “Lisa listen to me… it is not good to take medicine. Are you listening?”
“Lisa…” I looked deep into her eyes and saw her soul which was wounded and broken. I tried to know more about her pain from those eyes but I was not able to do so. Luckily I was able to calm down her down.
I knew her condition very well. I have been through this before. I too was in rehabilitation center. I too struggled hard to get just one shot of drugs. I know the pain, the addiction, the anxiety everything she was going through.
“I think it is better you take her out” said Arvin who was still checking every drawer of the room.
I wrapped my hand around her neck and took her out of the room. We walked to the garden. I made her sit on the bench where she was sitting with her husband the previous day. She pulled my suit when I looked at her she gestured me to sit beside her.
“Do you want me to sit here?” I asked. She nodded her head up and down indicating ‘Yes’.
I sat beside her. She kept her head on my shoulder. Her gaze was fixed on the same rose plant. There was silence between us for long time. I wanted to speak out but I had no words to say.
She then slowly lifted her hand and pointed her index finger towards the rose. I was not able to understand what she meant. So I asked her “do you want that rose?”
She didn’t gesture anything for a while. But suddenly spoke out “I know that plant.”
I was dumbfounded hearing her voice “you….you can speak.” I stammered trying to figure out whether I heard her or not.
“Yeah…” she replied without anything but I wanted to hear her more.
“But your husband… he said you cannot…”
“I feel it unnecessary to talk in front of him and for him” she said which I didn’t understand.
“If so then why are you talking with me?” I asked to keep the conversation ongoing.
“There are numerous reasons” she replied.
“Like…?” I asked.
“You are only the one who lit up light in my life” she replied.
I remembered last night she was screaming and when I lit up the light she came running towards me and hugged me tight. So, maybe she was talking about it.
“And…?” I asked again.
“The way you feed me no one ever did it to me” she replied.
“You wiped my tears away and instead of getting mad at me you calm me down” she said taking deep breath.
“And…?” I wanted to hear her voice for forever.
“And your presence soothes me…”
For a minute I felt my heart stopping listening her. There was total silence for some time until I asked her “why are you addicted to medicine?”