“So this block is where day activities take place” I said standing on the edge of the main door.
“Okay…” said Jessica looking around.
“Before showing you around I want to make you aware about the things that happens here” I stood facing towards them. When Jessica nodded being alert I started.
“So patients who are discharged from the room of first phase they are moved to normal dormitory. From the very next day their new life beings in our center…” suddenly Lisa raised her hand like small kid as if she wanted to ask something.
I smiled at her and asked “What?”
“What is room of first phase? I haven’t been there” she asked curiously.
“Room of first phase is the room where patients are kept when they are brought for the first time. It will be difficult for them to restrain their addiction for drugs all of a sudden so they are kept there for few days. You haven’t been there because your addiction is different and vary from their symptoms…”
“What? Addiction?” Jessica was shocked hearing me. She glanced at Lisa saying “Li this is unbelievable what am I hearing? From when did you start using drugs? I know life has been…”
Suddenly she paused. I glanced at Lisa and saw that she was gesturing something with her eyes.
“What is it?” I asked in astonishment.
“It’s been long time Jessica we haven’t met. I have many things to tell you” Lisa said totally ignoring my question.
“Is it?” Jessica’s expression changed.
I had no idea what to say “I think I will leave you two for a while and come back after sometime.”
“No, no I am sorry I interrupted. You can continue” said Lisa in apologetic tone.
Curiosity raised inside me to know the things which Jessica was about to say. I knew she would know lot more about Lisa and I was looking forward to talk to her in secret but still I got back to my topic.
“As I was saying the patient’s new life being after coming out of first phase room. From very next day they have to get up early and meditate for half an hour in hall number one. As you know meditation is very beneficial it helps to controls anxiety, reduces stress, enhance your memory power and many more but the most important thing is it helps to fight addictions. So that is why I kept it in number one list.”
“That’s impressive” Jessica said.
“So after meditation they have their breakfast and again come back to this block where they can explore their interest and hobbies. There is library, indoor as well as outdoor games, dance hall and many more. They are totally free to do whatever they are fond of enhancing their skills. Come I will show you the hall…” I lead them starting from hall number one.
“So I will be leaving now. Arvin and Jessica you are on lead” I said and walked out of the center.
As I reached the gate searching for keys on my pocket I heard Lisa calling me out “Steven…”
I turned around before I saw her coming toward me “Yes…”
She stood in front of me “so will I see you this evening?”
“No, I guess. My work is done here. I will sometime pay a visit here…” I replied.
“Oh! Well then have good day” she replied in low tone.
I nodded “thanks… you too have good day. Now you have your best friend by your side, enjoy. Bye”
“Bye…” she waved her hand.
I waved back at her and walked out of the gate. As I got on my car I glanced at her from the window she was still there looking at me. I smiled at her she smiled back. When I drove off I watched her from rare view mirror. Her figure shrank slowly as I got further and further. At certain point it completely disappeared and I felt sad. I wanted to turn around the car immediately and go back but deep down a voice arose ‘Don’t forget there is a line Steven. Now she is wife of someone else.’
I had to maintain distance as much as I can otherwise when she will be gone with her husband it will be very hard for me to come out of trauma. With so much difficulty I was able to move on before but this time I had no courage of losing her definitely not after getting close to her and knowing so many things about her. Without knowing her name I loved her madly and now knowing so many things about her I don’t know how I am going to stay away from her.
I tried to know about her from Jessica but I stopped myself from doing it. It would not be right for Lisa if I ask about her with her best friend. Deep inside I was afraid I would know her darkest secret and wouldn’t be able to let her go. So for that I thought to let it go and focus on my work.
As I had just got inside my office and sat on my chair Baca showed up.
“Ahem… um sir” she stammered maybe she was trying to figure out my mood.
“What is it?” I asked in calm tone.
“The business trip and site visiting for two weeks which was discussed some weeks ago is scheduled from tomorrow onward.”
When Baca’s completed her sentence I was lost in deep thought “I have to stay out for two weeks which means I will not be seeing Lisa. While I hope it might help me to stay away from her.”
“Sir…” when Baca called out loud I came back to my sense.
“Yes…” I said looking at her.
“I said do you want me to make the arrangements?” she asked in confused tone.
“Yeah, I will leave early morning tomorrow” I replied.
She nodded and turned around but I called her out “Baca wait… You didn’t bring my coffee today.”
She turned her head towards me. Smiling at me she replied “I will get it in a minute.”
Taking deep breath I got on my car. I was convincing myself to return back to my apartment. I started the engine. My heart was racing out loud.
“No, no you cannot go back to her. Head to your apartment Steven”
“Just for this time as I will not be able to get her glimpse from tomorrow”
“No” “Yes” “No” “Yes”
After having battle deep inside me I turned my car towards the center. I was not even sure whether I was doing the right thing or not. But I must admit that I had never felt that much soothe in my entire life returning back to my center. Thinking that I will get to see her gave me goosebumps inside. I noticed that the curve formed by my lips was not leaving my face.
Finally when I got close to the gate I saw Lisa standing on the same place where she was when I left that morning. There was big smile on her face seeing my car approaching her.
I got off the car and greeted her returning the smile “hey, still here?”
“I knew it you would come” she said with excitement mixed on her tone.
“Did you?” I was astonished. She nodded her head replying “Yes…”
“Did you stand here all day then?” I asked walking inside with her.
“I am not fool to stand here for whole day and hurt my legs. I do have my works” she said proudly.
“And can I know what work is it?” I asked turning towards her.
“You will know when I am gone” she said giving witty smile.
Her answer made me numb. I do know that she will be gone but hearing it from her made me heartbroken. I felt so helpless for not being able to make her stay by my side for forever.
Suddenly I don’t know what force was it but it was pushing me towards her. Step by step I got close to her. She was stepping back looking at me.
“Do you really want to leave?” I asked and hell knows why I did so.
When she approached the wall she stood still and said in low tone “I wish I could tell you the answer…”
She lowered her head watching her for a while I asked her “why can’t you answer it?”
She didn’t reply anything so I gripped her chin gently and lifted it making her to look at me “tell me why you can’t answer it?” I asked her again leaning closer to her face.
She stared deep into my eyes trying to say something “I….” my eyes fall on her rosy lips.
I leaned more close for the first time in my life I was that close to a girl. I was longing to touch her lips with mine. By now I saw she had closed her eyes which made me feel that she too wanted me to kiss her. As I was about to touch her lips with mine suddenly she looked away.
I hurriedly stepped back coming back to my sense and apologized “I… I am sorry… I didn’t mean to… I am really sorry. I know this is not right. I am so sorry.”
And without looking at her face I ran outside due to embarrassment. I was regretting it so much.
“What were you thinking Steven? You were about to kiss someone else’s wife. You know it right? It is a sin. James had trusted you and left her by your side so that you can cure her. But you… you are not a person that can be trusted just the way your father said. You are a cheater.”
“No, I am not… I loved her long before she got married…”
“Still you don’t have any right to kiss her not even touch her…”
As I was driving towards my apartment a war was going inside me. When I was not able to resist it anymore I pressed the break hard and got out of my car.
“AHHHHHHHH….” I screamed out loud.
“Why God? Why?” I kicked the tire furiously.
“What might she be thinking? Indeed must be angry at me as I was going to take advantage of her…. How Steven? How? How can you make such blunder mistake?”
After yelling out for an hour in that empty dark road I calmed myself down thinking that at least I didn’t kissed her but who knew it would be the greatest regret whole my life for not kissing her.