Always Everything

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Chapter Twenty-One

Aubrey woke up sprawled across the back of his dad. His morning wood was poking the side of his firm ass.

“Mmm,” he murmured. He groggily pushed his hips into his dad’s body.

“Your hard-on is poking me,” his dad muttered.

Aubrey turned and rubbed his face into the skin of his dad’s back, right between his shoulder blades.

“I can’t help it.” Aubrey kissed his spine.

“Guys always wake up hard. I usually just jack myself off.” His dad’s face was lying on the pillow, his arms under it.

“You have me now,” Aubrey said with another kiss.

“You’re not here everyone day.”

And Aubrey hated that. How did you tell your mom that though? He loved her, he really did, but since he’d gotten older he’d wanted to spend more and more time with his dad.

His dad rolled over onto his back, his hands going right to Aubrey’s ass.

Aubrey smiled lazily down at him. “Hey.”

He leaned up for a kiss. Aubrey met him half way. The kiss was slow, soft, and wet.

“You taste so good,” Aubrey whispered when he came up for air. His face was so close to his dad’s, their noses nearly touching.

“I taste like shit.” His dad chuckled. “I haven’t even brushed my teeth.”

Aubrey grinned and kissed him again, this time licking his lips. “Still good.”

His dad squeezed his ass as he chuckled again.

Aubrey rubbed his cheek against his dad’s rough one. He’d shaved yesterday, but it was already starting to grow back. His cock was now poking his dad’s ribs. He lifted one and curled it over the top of his dad’s thighs.

“I love waking up with you,” he whispered in his dad’s ear.

“I love it too,” his dad rasped.

“You know I’d be here all the time if I could.” He pulled back so he could look into his dad’s eyes.

“Your mom would flip the fuck out if you told her that.”

Aubrey rested his chin his hands, which were lying flat across his dad’s collarbone. “She won’t really have a choice when I leave for college.”

His dad squeezed his ass again. “Where are you going?”

“I haven’t decided yet.” He lowered his gaze. Everything was different now. How was he supposed to leave his dad? He couldn’t.

“Will you come with me?” he whispered.

His dad didn’t say anything for a few seconds. Aubrey looked at him again. He was staring at Aubrey with an unreadable expression in his eyes.

“You’ll be in college.”

Aubrey frowned. “Yeah.”

“With other kids your own age.”

Aubrey sighed as he got where his dad was going with this. “I already told you you’re my always everything. The thought of even...” he shook his head. “I can’t even go there.”

He lifted himself to his elbows and cupped his dad’s face. “You’re all I want.”

His dad’s hands slid up his back and over his shoulders. He held Aubrey’s face between his hands. “You’re all I want too. All I’ve ever wanted.” He swallowed. “The thought of you leaving for college...it...hurts,” he whispered the last word.

“I won’t go without you,” Aubrey said.

Even though it was over a year away, he knew he would feel the same way then as he did now. Leaving his dad wasn’t an option.

❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎

Remy was there. Aubrey didn’t know how to feel around the guy. He came around noon, and he’d been there about an hour so far. Aubrey had no idea what the guy wanted.

And why did his dad say yes to him coming over? All they’d done so far was sit around and talk.

Aubrey sat on the couch, pretending to watch Stranger Things, but he had no clue what was going on with Eleven, Mike, and the rest of the gang.

“I’m gonna take a piss,” his dad said as he got up from the couch.

They’d been sitting next to each other, but there had been plenty of room between them. They’d not touched once since Remy had arrived.

The minute his dad disappeared up the stairs, Remy was at his side.

Aubrey jumped a little.

“Hey,” he said softly.

Aubrey straightened.

“I just wanted you to know that I’m here if you need help.”

Aubrey furrowed his brows. “What?”

Remy swallowed and darted his eyes to the stairs then back to Aubrey. “I noticed the way you and your dad were, uh, acting the last time I was here.”

Aubrey felt his face drain of color and his heart beat faster.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Look, it’s okay. I once had a cousin that tried to put the moves on me, but I kicked his ass. I knew better.”

Now Aubrey felt mad. “Knew better? What the hell does that mean?” He scooted to the edge of the couch.

“Shit, it’s all coming out wrong.” He rubbed his face. “I just mean, when it’s someone who you love and trust it’s easier for them to take advantage of you.” He was speaking so calmly, like he was trying to coax a stray dog into taking food out of his hand.

Aubrey shot to his feet. “I think you need to get the hell out.” He was fuming. “How dare you try to even suggest that my dad would take advantage of me.”

Remy stood too. “I’m only—”

“What the fuck is going on?” His dad said as he came down the stairs.

Aubrey backed away from the couch. “He has the nerve to try to tell me that you were taking advantage of me.”

His dad stopped a few feet away from the stairs. Aubrey kept backing away from Remy until his back hit his dad’s chest.

“What the hell is he talking about?” his dad said.

Remy looked really uncomfortable, but determined.

“I saw the way you two were touching each other last time I was here.”

His dad gripped his shoulders.

“I know that’s not right. I love my dad, but I’ve never touched his thigh or sat nearly on top of him.”

Aubrey was pissed, but at the same time his body was trembling. He felt bile rising up his throat at the thought of what Remy would do.

His dad squeezed his shoulders lightly.

“I don’t know what you think you saw, but my boy and I have always been close. That’s not a fucking crime.”

Remy snorted. “Close I get. But whatever you two are,” he waved his hand between them. “That’s not normal.”

He was still standing in front of the couch.

Aubrey knew his hands were shaking, so he stuffed them in his pockets. He tried to keep a scowl on his face. He didn’t want Remy to see how freaked out he was.

Remy’s eyes kept bouncing between their faces.

“Something’s going on, and all I want is to help.”

“Nothing's going on,” his dad said. His voice was stern and his hands on Aubrey’s shoulders were the anchor he needed to remain calm.

“He’s sixteen, Sterling,” Remy said. He ran his hand through his hair. “You could fucking go to jail, not to mention it’s fucking wrong.”

Aubrey’s heart froze at the one word: jail.

“I need you to get your ass out of my house. The fact that you’re even insinuating that I’ve hurt my son in some way is pissing me the fuck off. You’re lucky I don’t beat your ass.”

Aubrey hoped he wouldn’t. Shit, then the police really would get involved.

“I can’t allow this to continue.” Remy pushed his shoulders back and stared hard at his dad.

“I know you’re molesting him and I can’t stand aside while it happens.”

And fuck.

His dad dove at Remy.

Aubrey yelled.

His dad threw his fist. Remy’s head snapped back.

“Dad!”

Remy plowed into his stomach with his head lowered. He wrapped his arms around his waist.

They fell to the couch. His dad pounded his fist on Remy’s back.

“Dad!” Aubrey ran to them. “Stop!”

They rolled to the floor, banging into the coffee table.

“You’re a sick fuck!” his dad shouted.

Remy rolled away. “You’re the motherfuckin’ child molester!”

His dad jumped at Remy.

Aubrey grabbed the neck of shirt, trying to yank him off.

Remy threw a punch as his dad straddled him.

Aubrey saw blood drip down his dad’s face.

“Shit!” Aubrey kicked Remy in the ribs.

“Get out of here, Aubrey!” His dad yelled. He punched Remy across the face.

Aubrey backed away just as they rolled along the floor.

Aubrey couldn’t even see what they were doing anymore. Fists were flying, legs were kicking.

The sound of flesh hitting flesh made Aubrey cringe.

They bumped into the chair, Remy on top of his dad. He lifted his fist.

“No!” Aubrey shouted. He ran at him. He threw his body into Remy’s, knocking him off. His head hit the side of chair as he fell to the floor.

“Get the hell away from him.” Aubrey fisted his hands in his dad’s shirt and pulled him up against his chest.

His dad didn’t resist.

Aubrey glared at him Remy.

“I know you think he’s doing it because he loves you, but that’s a lie. They all say that,” Remy panted. He rolled to his knees. There was a line of blood from his nose to his chin and his cheekbone looked like it’d bruise.

Aubrey didn’t give a fuck.

“You have no idea what you’re talking about,” Aubrey said through gritted teeth.

Remy looked at his dad cradled against his chest and then back up at Aubrey. He looked pained. “I’m only trying to help.”

His dad wrapped his arms around Aubrey, squeezing once, before getting to his feet. Aubrey got up with him, hovering close, not giving a shit that Remy was witnesssing the whole thing.

His dad didn’t even look at Remy. He just stood with his back towards the prick, his gaze set on Aubrey.

Aubrey stared back, his hands holding his dad on either side of his waist.

“We have to tell him,” his dad said softly.

Aubrey’s eyes widened. He shook his head.

“Baby,” his dad whispered. He cupped his face, his thumb gently caressing Aubrey’s cheek. “It’ll be okay.”

Aubrey felt his throat close. No. It wouldn’t be okay. Nothing about this was okay. He shook his head again.

“We’re fucked either way,” his dad said. He didn’t sound mad anymore. He sounded resigned. And that freaked Aubrey out more than anything. Because his dad was the one that had everything to lose in this scenario.

“I...” Aubrey couldn’t even get words out.

“What the fuck are talking about?” Remy stumbled to feet behind his dad. “Tell me what?”

Aubrey couldn’t breath. This couldn’t be happening. Shit, this was all his fault. He was the one to get frisky with his dad in front of Remy. What an idiot he was.

His dad just stared at him. Aubrey felt his eyes burn at the sorrow he saw in those dark eyes.

His dad knew what was coming. He knew what would happen to him when Remy reported their relationship to the police.

“This is so fucked,” Remy said.

“He’s going to tell either way,” his dad said. “But maybe with the truth...”

Aubrey didn’t believe that. He didn’t know Remy. He didn’t trust him. How could they reveal everything to a stranger? How could they tell their love story to someone that thought they were fucked up?

Aubrey’s chest hurt.

His dad leaned forward, so slowly. Blood was smeared across his nose and mouth. Aubrey felt a tear slid from the corner of his eye as his dad laid his lips on his forehead. He closed his eyes, his fingers digging into his dad’s ribs.

“Nothing changes,” his dad whispered against his skin.

Everything would change. Aubrey knew that.

His life was over.

❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎

Sterling didn’t know how the fuck this happened. His boy was trembling and crying.

His heart felt like it would beat right out of his fucking chest as he turned around to face Remy. He wanted to punch him again, he wanted to beat the very shit out of him, but all Sterling felt now was defeated.

He’d known this couldn’t last forever. He’d known eventually their relationship would come out.

Fuck. Did it have to happen so soon?

Remy was frowning at them, his brows knit together over his swelling eye.

“Are you going to call the cops?”

Sterling heard his boy inhale sharply behind him.

Remy fisted his hands and pursed his lips. “I can’t just walk away.”

He wanted to hate him, but Sterling found he couldn’t. Hadn’t he beaten himself up over his attraction to his own son? Didn’t he still think, deep down, that he was a pervert?

He felt Aubrey’s hands grip the back of his shirt. His boy was still shaking.

“Before you do, I think you should sit down.” He didn’t want to tell Remy everything, but he couldn’t think of any other way. He didn’t give a shit what Remy thought of him, or what he did. Sterling didn’t bend over for anyone. But for his boy, he did. And he knew Aubrey wouldn’t be able to handle Sterling’s arrest and imprisonment. So, for his son, he had to try to get Remy to listen. And that meant telling the man everything.

Remy looked at him for a few moments. “Why the hell would I take a seat?”

“So you can hear the truth.”

Sterling grabbed his son’s hand and led him over to the couch. They sat down, closer than they’d sat earlier, and looked at Remy.

Sterling’s palm was sweaty, but so was his boy’s. They were holding hands so tightly their knuckles were white.

Remy stared at their linked fingers as he carefully sat in the leather chair. The same chair Sterling had tasted his son for the first time in.

“Dad,” Aubrey whispered. His voice was shaky.

“It’s okay.” He knew it was a lie, but he couldn’t say anything else to him. He wanted to make this all go away. He wanted to gather his son in his arms and protect him from the fucking shitstorm that was about to happen.

“I’m listening,” Remy said.

Sterling didn’t even know where to start.

“I’m in love with him,” Aubrey said. He was still shaking, but his voice was firm.

Remy’s eyes widened. “What the hell? What do you mean you’re in love with him?” He shifted his wide eyes to Sterling. “Him him? Your dad?”

Aubrey swallowed loudly. “Yes.”

Remy leapt to this feet. “That’s it, I’m calling the police right fucking now. This is worse than I—”

Sterling rushed over to him as he pulled his phone from his pocket. He knocked it out of his hand.

Remy jerked his gaze to him. “What the fuck?”

“You’ll listen before you call,” he said low. He wasn’t going to let this guy destroy their lives without first hearing their side.

Remy glared at him.

“Please,” Aubrey whispered from behind Sterling.

Remy turned his glare to Aubrey. His face softened a bit. “Fine.”

They all sat again, watching each other, like they were waiting for someone to flip the fuck out.

“Why don’t you explain what you mean?” Remy directed the question at Aubrey.

Aubrey glanced at Sterling, before looking back at Remy.

He could tell his boy was nervous. He laced his fingers with Aubrey’s again, not giving a shit what Remy thought. Things couldn’t get much worse.

“I mean what I said. I’m in love with my dad.” He took a deep breath. “It wasn’t always like this, we were just a normal dad-son relationship. Well, maybe not like other kids my age.” He chuckled humorlessly. “But that’s not because anything inappropriate happened. We were just really close.” He swallowed as he looked at the floor. “He was my best friend.” Aubrey looked at Remy. “Still is.”

Sterling felt his eyes sting.

“I’ve always loved my dad more than anything in the world. Even when I was little, I always wanted to be around him.” Aubrey glared at Remy. “But he never did anything wrong. He wouldn’t even help me shower once I turned like eight.”

“Seven,” Sterling muttered.

Aubrey didn’t pay any attention. He only squeezed his hand harder. “I was the one to pursue a physical relationship.”

“You’re the child,” Remy said. “It’s his responsibility to put a stop to things.”

“And he did!” Aubrey said loudly. “He didn’t want to continue things, but I was the one that wanted our relationship to be not only physical, but everything.”

Remy frowned. “Everything?”

“Everything. Because he’s everything,” Aubrey choked out.

Sterling pulled him into his side. He kissed his head.

“That doesn’t make sense.” Remy scrubbed his hands down his face.

“This attraction just happened,” Sterling said. “I felt like a goddamn pedophile,” he glanced at his son. “Still do.”

Aubrey jerked upright. “You’re not a fucking pedophile.” Now he was glaring at Sterling.

“Okay,” Remy like he was teetering on the edge of a cliff. “I’m officially confused out of my fucking mind.”

Sterling wanted to throttle him. What the hell was he confused about?

We suck each other’s dicks and exchange spit didn’t sound like the right thing to say.

“It’s consensual,” Aubrey said.

“But you’re sixteen. How can you know what’s consensual and what’s not?”

“Now that’s just insulting. Why the hell would you assume I wouldn’t know my own mind?”

Sterling rubbed his eyes. This conversation was not going how he’d wanted it to.

“Remy,” he began. “My son and I are aware of how our relationship looks to everyone else, but what we’re trying to say is that no one’s being taken advantage of. I fought this for a while. I know what’s right and wrong, and my brain is fucking screaming at me to stop. But I couldn’t. I can’t.” He stared directly into Remy’s eyes. “What do you do when the one person society says you’re not supposed to touch is the one person who completes you?”

He’d never said anything like that before in his life, but it was the complete fucking truth.

Remy’s eyes were darting between Sterling’s.

Aubrey turned his face into Sterling’s shoulder, his grip tightening on his fingers.

A line formed between Remy’s brow as he stared at Aubrey leaning against Sterling.

Sterling didn’t know what he was thinking. His heart was thumping all over the fucking place and he felt his boy still trembling.

It was a fucking mess.

Remy slowly stood. “I don’t know what to say to this.” He looked at Aubrey, then Sterling. “This is wrong, no matter, what you say, and I don’t know if I can...” he heaved a sigh as he dug his fists into his eyes.

Aubrey lifted his head. “Please don’t take him away from me.”

Fuck. Sterling had never heard his son sound that way. So broken. So fucking sad. It nearly broke his heart into tiny fucking pieces.

Remy closed his eyes. “I...” he bent down and grabbed his phone. There was a jagged crack down the middle.

Sterling forced himself to sit calmly. He forced himself to not lash out at this man that held his fucking life in his hands.

He hated it. He hated people that had any kind of a hold over him. But this involved Aubrey. He couldn’t let his boy get hurt.

Remy didn’t say anything more, he didn’t even look at them, he just walked silently to the door and let himself out.

❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎

Aubrey heard the soft click of the door as it closed. He heard the creak of the gate as it was opened. He heard the footsteps fad to nothing.

But he couldn’t feel anything. He knew his dad was next to him. He knew he was clutching his hand. He knew their thighs were pressed tightly together. But he didn’t feel it.

He was numb. Ice cold terror froze him until he felt nothing.

“Aubrey...” his dad’s quiet voice was too loud in the stillness.

His voice...

He may never hear it again. He may never...

No. He couldn’t go there.

“Aubrey,” his dad said again.

Aubrey couldn’t move. Every part of him was stiff and numb.

He was aware of his dad moving, then he was kneeling in front of him.

“Aubrey,” he said as he cupped his cheeks and made Aubrey look at him.

His gaze was hard as steel. “Listen to me, no matter what happens, I’ll always love you.”

The rush of feeling hurt. Like his frozen body was tossed into hot water. He fell forward, clutching his stomach. He couldn’t breath.

“Breath, Aubrey.”

He gasped.

His dad’s mouth touched his ear. “Just breath.”

Aubrey gripped his dad’s arms like he was drowning.

“I’m right here.”

Aubrey gulped in a breath. It felt like the first one he’d taken since Remy had accused his dad.

His dad leaned his forehead against Aubrey’s. His warm breath ghosting over his parted mouth. “It’s gonna be okay.”

Aubrey knew it wasn’t. He closed his eyes as pained squeezed his heart. “He’s gonna tell,” he whispered.

“It doesn’t matter if he does.”

His dad didn’t deny it. He couldn’t deny it. Who could accept a dad having sex with his sixteen year old son?

“I can’t have you taken away.”

His dad wiped his tears away with the pads of his thumbs.

Aubrey’d not even realized he was crying.

“Aubrey, listen to me,” his dad said firmly. “No matter what happens you will move on.”

Aubrey shook his head.

“Yes.” His dad’s hands tightened a little on his face. “You will.”

Aubrey blinked, holding his eyes closed for a few seconds before looking into his dad’s gaze again. “You’re not going anywhere.”

Aubrey refused believe that.

His dad looked at him with pity — fucking pity.

Aubrey pushed his hands away. “What the hell, Dad?” He was pissed. His dad had never looked at him like that.

“Aubrey,” he said sadly.

“Why are you looking at me like that? You’ve never looked like at me like I was some sort of pathetic teenager who didn’t know his own damn mind.”

“No,” he said. He glared at him. “I don’t think you’re pathetic, I’ve never thought you were pathetic. I feel like shit. I feel like this is all my goddamn fault and you’re the one getting hurt by it.”

Aubrey buried his face in his hands. “It’s not your fault,” he said quietly. “It’s mine.”

His dad pried his hands away from his face. “I don’t want you thinking that way.”

Aubrey gave a humorless smile. “Then you can’t think that way either.”

His dad tried to smile, but it fell short, looking more like a lip spasm.

“I want you to go to Banner’s house.”

Aubrey sat up. “What? Why?”

His dad swallowed and looked at the floor. “I don’t want you to be here if...”

Aubrey’s eyes widened when he got what his dad was trying to say. Then his brows slammed down over his eyes. “When the cops show up?” He jumped to his feet. “Is that what you were going to say?”

He paced away. “How the fuck can you expect me to run with my tail between my legs like some goddamn pussy.”

His dad stood. “I’m not going to have you here when they show up. It’ll be bad enough without you making a scene.” His dad cringed after he said that.

“A scene?” Aubrey said. He stared at his dad in shock. “What the hell is wrong with you? You think I’d make a fucking scene?”

“Baby...”

“Don’t baby me, asshole.”

His dad snapped his gaze to Aubrey. “Watch it, kid, I’m still your dad.”

Aubrey scoffed. “Yeah, my dad who I fuck!”

His dad stormed over to him. He put a hand over his mouth, like he was trying to keep him quiet.

“Why don’t you just climb on top of the fucking roof and shout that shit out for the whole fucking neighborhood to hear?” He growled.

Aubrey bit his palm.

“Ow!” His dad jerked back. “You little shit.”

“You didn’t seem to mind how loud I was being when your tongue was up my ass!” He yelled.

His dad grabbed his chin and pushed him against the wall. “Keep talking and the police will be banging down my goddamn door.”

Aubrey struggled in his grip. “Let me go.”

His dad pushed him harder into the wall. “No.”

Aubrey banged his fists against his dad’s chest and kicked his shins.

His dad shoved his thigh between Aubrey’s legs and pressed.

Aubrey froze at the slight pain in his groin.

“Listen to me,” his dad whispered harshly. “You need to calm the fuck down and stop shouting shit about fucking your dad.”

Aubrey glowered at him, baring his teeth.

His dad’s dark eyes were angry and...frightened.

Aubrey lost some of his steam at the sight of that emotion in his dad’s eyes.

“I’m scared too,” Aubrey whispered.

His dad released the pressure between his legs. “I’m sorry, baby.” He sounded raw.

Aubrey unfisted his hands and laid them flat on his dad’s chest. “It’s okay.”

His dad closed his eyes and shook his head. “It’s not okay.” His fingers spread over Aubrey’s face, pressing and caressing, like he was trying to absorb his features into himself.

“I’m sorry,” he choked out. “It’s not okay.”

Aubrey gripped the sides of his neck. “It’s fine,” he said softly.

His dad’s lips tightened as his eyes squeezed. “It’s not.”

Aubrey saw a single tear escape his eye. He grabbed him and brought his head to his shoulder.

His dad’s arms wound around his waist.

And he sobbed.

Aubrey lowered their bodies to the floor. The sound of his dad’s sobs tore through him.

They sat there, holding each other. Fingers tight and bodies shaking.

Aubrey couldn’t get close enough, he wanted to crawl inside his dad’s body and never come out. He straddled his dad’s lap, crushing his legs around his waist.

He didn’t know when his tears had started, but he cried with his dad. For his dad. And for himself. For what they had. For what they’d always had. A love that went beyond the natural relationship of a father and son. A love that broke barriers. A love that lasted through time. A love that didn’t give a fuck about what was accepted and what wasn’t.

Aubrey knew he’d never love like this again. He knew he’d never hold another person in his arms or kiss their skin. He’d never open himself up to another soul, because his soul was sobbing in his arms.

They clung to each other, barely able to breath.

This couldn’t be the end to their story. Aubrey wouldn’t let it be.

After some time, he didn’t know how long, their tears dried. The silence in the house felt heavy.

His dad lifted his head from Aubrey’s shoulder. Red rimmed, puffy eyes stared back at him.

They didn’t say anything. There wasn’t anything to say.

Without a word, his dad picked him up, stumbling a little as he rose to his feet. Aubrey tightened his legs and arms around him.

They walked through the living room, up the stairs, and into the bedroom. Gently, his dad lowered them to the bed. Aubrey moved his legs to the sides when his dad laid on his back. Silently, Aubrey sat up, still sitting across his dad’s lap. He took his shirt off, and then his shorts and underwear.

His dad watched him, blood and dried tears smeared all over his face.

Once Aubrey was naked, he rolled to the bed. His dad sat up and took his shirt off, then his bottoms.

Now both naked, they came together, skin against skin. Soft cock pressed to soft cock. Aubrey burrowed into his dad’s chest and slid one of his thighs between his dad’s.

His dad pulled the sheet over their heads, then pulled Aubrey closer. His cheek rubbed back and forth along Aubrey’s hair.

Their bodies were meshed together, every part touching. Their skin became sticky with sweat, but they didn’t pull away.

They were in their own world, a cocoon of their own making. Nothing was between them. And nothing was around them.

Nothing but love.

❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎


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