Your body begins to tremble at the memory of Zachs twisted face as you took his life.. The wheezing death rattle that escaped his lungs rings in your ears.. "I.. I killed Zach.." You sob and Patrick springs to his feet, taking your hand and leading you back to your seat on the sofa, dropping down beside you, his thumb tracing soothing circles on your wrist, his eyes watching you with concern ..
"Yeah.. You did.." He nods calmly..
"The blood.. God, Patrick - there was so much blood.. I didn't want to do it.. but.." Your voice wavers so you pause to steady yourself... Patrick doesn't speak, he just watches you, with a soft understanding expression on his face as he listens.. "He wanted me to go back to him.. To re-marry him.. and when I refused, he.. He tried to force himself on me.. I.. I cut his throat open with a piece of glass.."
Patrick tries to keep a straight face, but his eyebrows twitch when you mention the 'how' .. You know the gruesome nature Zachs death is truly terrible, just from his reaction.. "Oh god.. The sound he made.. I can still hear it.." You sob again..
"Shhhh.. You're alrite', Princess.." You lean into his comforting embrace, immediately feeling that familiar security and safety you felt around him from the moment you met.. "Honestly, Yevie.. You did the guy a favour.. Compared to what I was goin' to do with him once I got my hands on him.. I reckon he got off easy.." His voice is hard, angry.. Not angry at you.. But more at himself..
"You don't mean that.."
He pulls back and looks down at you, jaw set and eyes deadly serious.. "I absolutely do mean that, princess.. That's who I am Yevie.. If killing Zach makes you a bad person, then I'm a fuckin' monster.."
It hurts your heart to him him talk about himself like that.. He's no monster.. He's the most incredible man you've ever met.. He's also the first person who ever really understood you.. Who you really are.. "No.. That's not.. You're not.."
You understand him.. He is a good man, who does what is right and just.. If you can forgive his actions so easily, you must be able to forgive your own.. Clarity hits you like a tonne of bricks.. Zach's death is not your fault, it's his own.. You can feel remorseful for the act itself.. But feeling guilty for his death .. No.. Zach doesn't deserve to hold that power over you from beyond the grave..
You're finally free.. Really, truly free..
"I know what I am princess.. I think you do too.. An' I know that you value people in a way I don' entirely understand, even those who don' necessarily deserve it.. But I think this time.. You can give yourself a break, Yevie.. Zach was a piece of shit.. Death doesn' make you a Saint.."
No, he's definitely right.. Death doesn't make you a Saint...
You nod, wiping your eyes.. "That.. Actually makes sense.. When did you get so smart?" You smack his arm playfully, a faint smile forming on your lips..
"I 'ave me' moments.." He grins..
You pull your feet up beneath you and wriggle into a more comfortable position.. He shifts too, learning back and stretching a heavy arm along the back of the couch.. "I am still mad at you for disappearing.." You keep your gaze cast down, afraid to look at him because, you don't want to be mad at him.. But him leaving while you were in the hospital really stung.. Even if he was rescuing all those people and tracking down your bitch of a mother.. Which.. Obviously was more important, you know that.. But the disappearing thing he does.. It scares you.. Because you sure that one day, he won't come back..
"I know.." He says with simple acceptance..
You twist your hands together in your lap, now remembering the way you had left Patrick on the night of your abduction.. "Are you mad at me?"
He frowns.. "Why would I be mad at you, princess?"
You look up into his arctic blue eyes.. "I shouldn't have left your apartment.. That night.."
He shakes his head, leaning towards you.. "That was on me.. Not you.. You were right.. I was runnin' away from my feelin's for you.."
You feel like such a bitch for guilt tripping him like that.. Just because you had been embarrassed, that didn't give you the right to put expectations on him.. "No.. I wasn't right.. That was a selfish thing for me to say Paddykins, I'm not going to pressure you again.. As long as you're in my life, the label really doesn't matter.."
You smile, his head cocks to one side before he grins wide and shakes his head.. "You don' remember?.."
You don't know what he's talking about.. "Don't remember what?"
He shakes his head.. "Nevermind.. Hey, I was thinkin' tomorrow I could take you to meet with Carlos.. He's still in holdin' at Specter.."
Your nerves buzz at the mention of your father's name.. "What do you know about him?"
He shrugs a shoulder, not giving much away.. "He had no priors, and was a good soldier.. As far as our investigations go, he seems like a decent guy.. The Intel he provided all checked out to be true... I don' know what else I can tell you princess.."
You hesitate.. "And.. You're not too busy to go with me?"
He leans forward, tucking your hair back.. "Too busy for you? Nah, never.." His hand lingers at your cheek and your eyes are fixated on that delicious mouth of his..
"Patrick.. Will you stay with me tonight?"
He grins and stands up, offering you a hand, which you take and he pulls you effortlessly to your feet.. "Nowhere else I'd rather be princess.."
Heat flares in his eyes, igniting a fire deep in your belly.. You tug on his hand, pulling him with you as you walk backward towards the bedroom, your gaze never leaving his, the electricity rising in the air between you.. "I need you, Patrick.."
Your back bumps into the bedroom door and he's all over you in a matter of seconds.. His fingers tangle in your hair as his parted lips meet yours in a searing, soul touching kiss.. You feel his rigid muscle press against you, as he pins you to the door..
His kisses soon drop to your neck and his hands begin to slide down to your hips, crassesing every inch of you along the way.. "Goddamn.. Yevie.. You're a goddess.." He sinks to his knees in front of you, your head tips back and you steady yourself with both hands on his shoulders, reveling in the sensation of his tongue as it traces over your stomach, though he is careful to stay clear of your scar.. His thumbs slip into the waistband of your pants, but he pauses..
Your head falls back down and you lower your gaze to see him staring up at you, a question in his eye.. "Yes, Patrick.. God, yes.." He doesn't waste any time, carefully stripping away your clothes.. His fingertips run up and down your legs, the feeling is already too good, and feel yourself winding tighter with anticipation..
He lifts one of your legs behind the knee and hooks it over his bulky shoulder.. Next his firm grip takes your hips, holding you up, and in place.. His breath caresses your essence, making you quiver with excitement.. "Perfect.." He growls before lapping a single languid stroke that sends your mind reeling and before you can recover, he does it again..
He takes you in his mouth, alternating between sucking and swirling his unbelievably flexible tongue.. He works you into a frenzy, playing in delicious patterns until you are writhing and panting beneath his lashing tongue.. His groans of lust are lost to your ears as the blinding pleasure overcomes you.. "Ohhhhh.. Ohh, Patrick.. Yess.."
"I need more princess.." He grumbles against your swollen flesh..
Your inner walls clench and release in blissful waves, but just as they begin to subside, he slips his fingers slowly and deeply into you, gently stoking your fires and beginning the whole chain over again.. The coil inside you winds tighter and his tongue re-joins his fingers, lapping gently against your swollen pink pearl..
"Ohhh goddd.. I'm.. I'm.." Sparkles explode behind your closed eyelids and the one leg that you were standing on trembles, Patrick's grip on you tightens as he withdraws his fingers and rises to his feet..
He scoops you up with one arm and opens the door with the other, you squeal but don't protest.. "Ah! Patrick!" He chuckles and you feel the vibration in his chest with your palm as he sets you in the bed, his eyes rake over you..
"Fuck me, you're the most perfect thing I've ever seen princess.."
You laugh.. "Have you never looked in a mirror!" You shift to your knees and reach out, tugging at the hem of his t-shirt.. He fists his shirt at the nape of his neck and pulls it off over his head, revealing the hard earned six pack and the hottest V shaped hips you've ever laid eyes on.. He is so fine he literally makes your mouth water.. "Oh my god.. I forgot about those.."
You trace a finger down the center of his abs and he lets out a velvet chuckle.. "Comes with the territory.." Your hand stops at his zipper..
You toy with the top button of his jeans until it pops open, and slowly slide his zipper down.. "I definitely didn't forget about this though.." You rub a palm over him and you fill his hardness twitch..
"You're killin' me princess.." He grins, kicking off his boots before stripping out of his remaining clothes.. He stands before you in all his naked glory. And honesty, 'glorious' doesn't even begin to describe how god damned hot he is!