Life is Just Not Kind

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‘I can’t wait to make you my wife. Finally I’ll get to call you Mrs Tshawe’

I click send and wait for her response

‘I can’t wait to be a Mrs Tshawe myself. Meet you at the alter’

I read it and smile to myself

“We are still here!”

Bakho says nudging me, I laugh

“my wife just sent me a text”

I say

“Not your wife yet”

He says rolling his eyes and we all laugh

“hey don’t kick him down”

Troy says

“I’m too happy to let his negativity bring me down”

I say smiling proudly. There’s a knock on the door that shuts us all up, Troy goes to get it and soon mom walks in. she looks beautiful in her Gold dress.

“My sons, you all look wonderful”

She says

“Thank you mom”

We say in unison, including Troy. He asks to excuse himself leaving me with my brothers and mother.

“You boys look handsome”

She says and we thank her while complimenting her too. She takes a deep breath and lets it out

“I always imagined Bandile being the first one to get married and now it’s finally happening”

She says and I smile

“I beat him to it”

Bakho says proudly

“Yes you did but he was waiting to meet his soulmate and he’s finally met her. Bandile you know I loved that girl from the minute I met her and after today I get to call her my daughter in law. Son I am proud of you, it took you long enough but I am still proud of you for finally coming to your senses and doing what is right for yourself and your kids”

She says and I laugh

“But Mah she was the one that didn’t want marriage not me”

I say defensively

“I don’t care. Mihlali is a real catch and you are so lucky to be marrying her just as she is lucky to be marrying you because I know I did a great job raising you and your brothers. I’m proud of all of you, Baya we waiting for you now”

She says and he laughs

“not anytime soon ma’am”

He says and we all laugh

“Your father would be so proud of you, for everything you have built and for everything you have accomplished just as I am proud. Bandile not once did I ever go to sleep with tears in my eyes because your father said something insulting or because I heard he was busy with another woman so I don’t expect you to put Mihlali through that. I don’t know the pain of being cheated on, Lukhona doesn’t know what it’s like, don’t be the black sheep. Create the kind of tradition whereby your kids look up to you and learn from you how it is to treat your wife and this goes to all of you boys including you Bayanda. I don’t want to say much so the rest I’ll save it for my speech later”

she says, we all gather around to hug her tightly. We break the hug when a knock comes on, it’s Troy

“Delivery for Mr Tshawe”

He says and we all ask in unison

“Which one?”

He laughs

“The only one getting married”

He says rolling his eyes

“Here you go, from the future Mrs”

He says handing me a black box

“What is it?”

Baya asks

“I don’t know, I’m still opening it”

I say unwrapping the box, when I’m down I’m welcomed by another black box and when I open the lid there’s a watch inside with a black belt. I can’t describe it but I will say it looks beautiful and classy and very much my style. I take it out

“Hlali’s got taste”

Baya says and I chuckle

“I taught her well”

I say proudly

“It’s so sweet, there’s a note”

Mom says handing me the note, I read it out loud

“To the worlds most amazing man, father and son. The one man that’s always punctual no matter the circumstance. The man of my dreams, the man I want to

spend the rest of my life with. I’d say something cute and sweet but then I don’t want to give you ideas with what to say. Meet you at the alter handsome. I love all day, everyday and forever. Mihlali”

“Ncoooh that’s so cute”

Mom says

“Yeah she is sweet”

I say putting the watch on

“I have to go somewhere real quick, I’ll be back before we leave”

Baya says

“Where are you going?”

I ask him but he’s already out of the door

“What’s that about?”

Mom asks and I shrug

“I wish I knew”

She says




“Your dress is here”

Lara says walking in with my white dress

“Thank you friend”

I say, I just finished showering. I check my phone for texts from my husband and respond to him then continue talking to my girls. My bridesmaids are Yoza, Ise and Mange and Lara is my Maid of Honour

“Friend is everything set at the venue?”

I ask Lara

“Yes honey, Zonke says everything is as you asked for”

She responds

“I’m nervous, is it normal to be nervous?”

I ask and they all laugh

“It’s wouldn’t be the best day of your life it you weren’t” Yoza says and hands me a glass of champagne

“Thanks babe, non-alcoholic right?”

I ask

“Of cause”

She responds. I still breastfeed so I can’t be drinking alcohol for the sake of my baby.

“Guys where is my daughter”

I ask, I haven’t seen her ever since I woke up

“your daughter has grandparents who love and adore her”

Ima responds and I roll my eyes

“Where is mom anyway?”

I ask slipping on the all white lingerie and the gutter

“Your mother is somewhere in the house with your father I am assuming”

Yoza says, I take out my phone and call mom who says she’ll be in my room as soon as she’s done getting dressed. The girls are doing their make up and I am just moving around making sure that their hair and make up is up to standard and is what I wanted. I walk out to the balcony to just breathe

“It’s finally happening”

Mom’s voice brings me back, I turn and she’s standing by the door. I’m wearing as white gown written ‘bride’. I take a deep breath and let it out

“I’m nervous”

I say and mom pulls me into her arms

“The nerves are a good sign baby”

She says and then pulls me away from her arms

“Where’s Sethu?”

I ask her

“She’s with your girls in the room. Lets sit down and talk a bit”

She says and I we sit down on the chairs “you certain you ready?” She asks and I shrug

“I don’t know, I know I want to spend the rest of my life with him”

I say confidently and mom chuckles

“Then you ready. Marriage is a huge step, we’ve had this conversation quite a lot over the past few months and you have assured me time and time again that this is what you want. Bandile is a great guy Hlali, he’s everything a man should be and more. I am proud to call him my son in law and I am certain that you are as proud to call him your husband and father of your children”

She says and I smile nodding “I love him so much Mah” I say and she smiles

“I know baby. On my wedding, mom gave me something blue, something old and something borrowed”

She says and then slips her hand into her gown pocket and comes out with a small box

“When I got married my mother gave me this ankle bracelet, she got it for her mother who got it from her mother and so forth. It’s a family thing that we hand it

over to the first born daughter on the day they get married”

She says and helps me put it on, the bracelet has blue diamond stones on it but they very small

“And this is the necklace and these are the earrings that go with the anklet. Mihlali I am proud of you my baby. Every choice you have made has led you here, as a mother I have always allowed you kids to make your own choices just as my mother allowed me to make my own choice while guiding me towards the right path and I hope as a mother I have guided you to the right path”

I touch her hand

“you have done more than that mom and thank you”

I say

“Anyway, let me help you wear this and then go and feed my grand child”

She says and I laugh as she helps me put on the jewellery. It’s beautiful and it goes perfectly with my dress. When we done we share a long hug with i-love you’s. When we done I return inside and Lara hands me my daughter, I feed her while pumping milk with the breast pump on the other breast. When she’s full she pushes my nipple out with her tongue, I burp her and then mom takes her. I pump the other breast so that she atleast has 3 full bottles of milk. I’m about to get dressed when there’s a knock on the door, Ise opens the door and

soon Baya is in my room. He and I haven’t been friends ever since I came back from New York, he wasn’t all too excited when his brother proposed to me so I am shook to see him here right now

“Hlali may I speak with you in private”

He says

“Follow me”

I say and then lead us to the balcony

“I had my doubts about you and your intentions with my brother when you came back from NY and now I realise I was wrong about you. Bandile loves you Hlali and you have proven to love him just as much if not more. I’ve been an idiot and a real jerk to you when you tried so very hard to make peace with me and that was wrong. I am sorry Mihlali for being the jerk I’ve been to you”

He says, I won’t lie that was unexpected from him

“I… I don’t know what to say”

I say honestly

“Just say you’ll marry my brother and treat him right”

He says and I giggle

“That’s obvious”

I say and he chuckles

“Good luck Mihlali”

He says and I throw myself into his arms, he hugs me tightly and then we break it

“Thank you Baya”

I say and he smiles, we return to the room and then he leaves. I return to the room and get my make up done, my hair styled and then wear my beautiful wedding dress and shoes and everything. When we are all done we make our way to the church. I wanted my wedding to be indoors and then the traditional wedding to be outdoors.

“You look beautiful my baby”

My father says and kisses my forehead

“Thank you daddy”

I say

“If he fuck’s up don’t be scared to call me ok? I’ll set him straight”

He says and I giggle

“He knows dad”

I say, he takes a deep breath and lets it out

“I love you my baby, I love you so much and I am proud of you”

He says and I smile and turn to hug him tightly. “I love you too daddy”

I say. I didn’t want the traditional ‘here comes the bride’ wedding song. I wanted something different, I wanted A Million Years to play in the background when I walk towards my husband and a slide show of our pictures and videos on a screen in front over where my husband and I will be saying our vows. We step out when the song starts, I see my husband smile with glossy eyes watching me walk down the isle with my arm hooked to my father’s. The music is cut off by moans, I look up and the sextape Daniel made of us and once threatened me with is playing.

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