EVADING EMOTIONS

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CHAPTER FOURTEEN

Nick

I dialled Mia’s extension and waited as it rang continuously. “Hello, Mia’s phone.” a chipper female answered. “Hi, it’s Nick. Where is Mia?” “Oh sir, she left about three hours ago. Stormed out actually. I don’t know…” I slammed the phone in it cradle, cutting off the voice on the other end. I tried calling her cell but it went straight to voicemail. Worry crept into my mind so I grabbed my keys and drove home.

Mia was not at my apartment so I drove to hers. I knocked on her door and waited several minutes until she answered. She stood by the doorway looking broken and vulnerable before walking further inside as I followed. Mia made her way into the kitchen and she filled her glass with water before taking a sip. I would have expected her to grab her stash of wine given the state she was in and that unusual behaviour really worried me. “What’s wrong Mia?” I ask and she massages her temples, taking in a deep breath. “I don’t want to talk about it right now.” she says. “Thank you for checking up on me but I really want to be alone right now.” she requests. Her eyes were red and it seemed like she was just tired of crying. She looked lost. “Okay, I’ll leave you alone…” she releases a relieved breath. “..but only after you tell me what’s going on. Did I do something to hurt you?” I ask as I wrack my brains trying to think of possible answers “No. You’ve been great.” she says as she tries to smile to ease my worry but I know her like an open book. I stare at her and think of possible reasons for her breakdown, but I come up blank. “Please Mia. Please just tell me. I love you.”, I say and she chuckles harshly. “I know you do Nick. I just can’t help but wonder if you will love me through it all. I could ruin your life you know.” she says and I stare at her in confusion, anger inching closer to the surface. “How could you ever think that? Haven’t I done enough to prove to you how much I care? How much I want to be with you?” I say, swiping everything on the table to the ground with my hand. She flinches as the items hit the floor and the sound of glass breaking made her run to pick up an item which I realised was a picture frame, staring at it as her dam broke. “I didn’t mean to get angry Mia. I’m just so sick of you not trusting my feelings for you.” “I know.” she whispers. She turns the tiny picture frame to face me and through the shattered glass, a black and white sonogram lay underneath. She points to a little dot in the middle as I go closer to her. “This was Tom’s and my baby. I was only two months pregnant when I had to abort. Even though I blamed my mother for forcing me, I could have still backed out. I probably would have been a struggling single mother right now and you probably wouldn’t have even met me. Every day in my life I regret going through with it. It didn’t matter that I was so young. It didn’t matter that I was naïve and unable to care for my baby. I should have had my baby and do anything any everything to give it what it needed. I don’t even know whether it was a boy or a girl.” she says as she looks longingly at the scan and my heart breaks. I don’t know what triggered her trip down memory lane but I was going to stick by her. Just when I was about to speak, she continues. “This time though, I would do it right.” My heart caught in my throat as I took in her words. “What do you mean?” I ask carefully as my heart speeds up. She stays quiet for the longest time while my mind goes into overdrive. “I’m pregnant.”, she finally says and my heart stops. “What?” I ask, the question slipping from my lips before I could catch them. She looks at me now and gives me a wary smile. “Are you sure?”, I ask, my disbelief echoing through my cracked voice. “I took a blood test. Its confirmed.” she states and my heart sky rockets. We were pregnant! My face morphed into a huge grin as happy tears welled in my eyes. Clearly Mia hadn’t expected me to react in that way because she looked at me like I was an alien. I closed the distance between us as I pulled her into my arms and kissed her, but she didn’t kiss me back so I pulled away. “That’s great news Mia.” I say truthfully. “Well the last time I uttered those words, Tom wasn’t exactly thrilled even though he pretended to be. So don’t blame me if I don’t believe you. One day you’re happy and the next you might want me to get rid of it.”, she says under her breath. Irritation works its way up my spine but I held it down. She had been through the same thing with someone else and I am going to show her that this time is going to be different. I never thought I’d be a father, well not so soon anyway, and having a child with Mia felt like a dream come true. I squeeze her in my arms before letting her go and doing a silly happy dance. She smiles slightly. “What are you doing?” “Dancing. This is the happiest day of my life.” I say which makes her smile broaden. “Are you sure about this? You don’t have to go along with any of this. I’m not incapable anymore, I can raise the baby on my own.” she says and I know she means it. “I’m absolutely sure. I want this. I want you. I know you don’t love me yet and that’s okay but trust me when I say that I will love and protect both of you.” I say as I pick her up and swing her around. She giggles and it’s the best sound I’ve heard all day. “I love you Nick.” She says in between happy sobs and Just when I thought the day couldn’t get any better, those three little words made me soar. “And no, it’s not my hormones; I think it’s too early for it to be acting up right now. I guess I always did and I fought it, but right now, at this very moment, I am certain. I love you with all my heart and I know our baby will too. I’m sorry for holding out on you.” “Holding out makes it so much sweeter.” I kiss her and thankfully this time she kisses me back with so much emotion, I found it hard to breathe. I waited for this day forever and finally it became a reality. “Let me show you how much you mean to me.”, I say as I carry her to the bedroom and I make true to my promise.

Mia

I huffed as aunt Hilda struggled to zip up my wedding dress. “Is it moving?” I ask, exasperated. “It’s getting there.”, she says, letting out a breath as it finally zipped up. “When did you get this dress?’ she asks. “Last week.” I answer, taking a seat on the nearby couch due to my aching, swollen feet that were shoved in white sandals. “Oh.”, she says and I laugh. “Yeah I know, but can you blame me? I am growing a little human in my tummy.” I say as I run my hand over my huge baby bump. “I didn’t say anything.” aunt Hilda defends. “Doesn’t mean you weren’t thinking it.” Aunt Hilda shrugs as she smiles at me. “You’re glowing.” she says dreamily and I blush. A knock sounds on the door before Nicolene steps in. “Oh my God! You’re gorgeous.” she says as she pulls me into her arms. “The dress seems a bit tight though.” she says as she examines my sweetheart, opaque dress. “Yeah. Blame Nick. He keeps shoving food in my mouth, even though I told him not to.” “Well that is what a man does when he loves you and you’re carrying his child.” Nicolene chides as she defends her first born. I roll my eyes and smile, wondering if I’d do the same for my little boy or girl. Another knock sounds my door and this time Patrick stood by the doorway. His eyes lit up, ’You look wonderful Mia.”, he says and I blush once again. My cheeks probably look like tomatoes right now. “The ceremony is about to begin.” he says and he rushes off. I shuffle out of the room with Aunt Hilda and Nicolene beside me, taking in a breath to calm my nerves as I make my way to Nick.

“…I promise to protect you, to care for you, and to love you until my last breath because God and everyone else here knows that you always belonged to me and I take this oath to fulfil all your dreams and all your wishes in my quest in being your husband.”, Nick vows and I tear up. “I swear to be yours forever and to give you and our unborn child my entire heart. I thank you for all you’ve done for me, for us and I swear to be yours forever. I love you.” I vow, my heart thundering in my chest. Nick stared at me with a smile stretching his soft lips and in his eyes I saw us, our future. A future that I had never in my wildest dreams would have thought would be meant for me, but it was a future that I refused to avoid any longer.

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