I picked up myself slowly from the floor where I lay in a pathetic position, my body full of aches from his blows and in between my thighs throbbing in pain from his forceful and rough penetration gathering my tattered clothes and what little dignity I have left I quietly made my way out the penthouse.
Luckily the bastard was nowhere to be seen because I don't think I could stand seeing the monster, after what he did to me.
Fortunately, no one was lurking around the building as everywhere was as quiet as a graveyard.
My movement was quick, even though I throbbed immensely from the pain in between my legs as I wanted to be far away from this place as possible.
Outside the building, I was so lucky to see a taxi coming on towards me with its light contrast to the darkness of the night a testament to my feelings at the moment.
I flagged down the taxi, "take me to this address" I mumbled flatly, barely holding the tears away.
I gave him my home address and entered the back.
As soon as my back hit the seat the dam broke free as my tears ran down my eyes like a flowing, unwilling to stop coming no matter how many times I wiped my eyes so I gave up and leaned my head against the screen of the windows focusing on the scenery as we zoomed past them, and trying so hard not to think about a few minutes ago of my life.
I saw the driver cast several worried glances my way, I wanted to tell him to concentrate on his driving but I couldn't muster the strength to care, if we crash this moment I wouldn't mind, at least it will be an escape from this bitterness that is choking up my throat making it difficult to breathe.
I started panting, trying to get in air but it seems the harder I tried the more elusive it was.
"Are you alright?" cried the driver, his tone worrisome as he quickly parked at the sidewalk.
Without waiting for him to open the door, I flung it open and ran to the sidewalk where I emptied the whole content of my stomach till it was just a dry heave remaining. I strengthened up and took in much-needed air.
I saw some passer-byes cast disgusting looks my way, because of the state of my partial undress, but it didn't bother me, their judgemental gazes were the list of my problems considering the night I just had.
"Miss are you really all right, do I need to take you to the hospital?" The driver asked again his eyes filled with worry and probably fear, in case I was dying, I will not die in his care.
Not in the mood for more public scrutiny I shook my head no, turning down his offer of the hospital. "Just continue to the address," I whispered wiping my mouth clean and walking back to the car, I get a bit unsteady.
In front of my house, the driver was quick in letting me off as he hightailed it off our driveway not waiting for his fee.
I tried to sneak into the house but, the brightness that almost blinded me as the living room light came up thwarted that effort. Not waiting for ma to say anything I ran towards my room and locked myself inside.
I slowly slid down against the door till I slumped to the floor in dismay, my head cradled in my hands as I wept bitterly, my shoulders shaking from the intensity of my cry.
"Evie baby are you alright?" mum asked through the door her tone filled with worry. "please open the door" she begged, trying the door.
I have to clean up first before I can open the door, I don't want her seeing me like this it will break her heart, I thought.
I stood up slowly, my legs shaking badly, and dragged myself into the bathroom.
Inside the bathroom, the feel of the water from the showerhead stung so many of my bruises making flinch and reminding me that I was still alive keeping at bay this numbness that was creeping into my soul.
I allowed the water to run freely down my body not moving to scrub or clean up.
I wished the water could wash away the whole night from my body, his touch, the feel of him inside me.
The whole incidence flashed through my mind again, and I picked up my sponge and started scrubbing my body hard trying to scrub away his memories, I scrubbed till my body turned red, and yet there was no difference I flung the sponge away in frustration sliding down to the floor as more tears ran down my cheeks.
I stayed a few minutes more inside the bathroom before I dredged myself up and came out. The feel of my clean clothes gave me some kind of comfort and allowed me to open my door for mum who was leaning against the wall waiting patiently.
"Oh!, baby what happened?" she asked looking very worried. I just fell into her arms and began to cry again.
She took me to the bed where she sat down and took me into her arms consoling me.
"Is alright baby, it is all going to be okay," she said softly, stroking my hair.
"How?, mama, " I asked lips trembling, eyes swollen and filled with tears.
"Because you are a strong baby," she said kissing my forehead.
"But I haven't even told you what happened ma," I said looking up at her.
"You didn't have to sweet baby."
"Is all my fault, maybe I asked for it" I lamented in anguish, lying back on mums lap as I tried to figure out what I did to deserve this. Was God punishing me for something if I must have committed a grave sin for this to be my punishment?
"Shush baby is not your fault, " she said stroking me tenderly, but I could hear the pain in her voice as she too tried to keep her tears from falling.
"I wish I never met him, " I whispered quietly.
"Is going to be OK my darling" she kept saying as her hand continued to move through my hair gently.
"What are we going to do?" I asked softly feeling so tired and sleepy.
"We will talk about it tomorrow, now rest my darling," she said laying my head gently on the bed as my eyes closed.
No no no please don't I begged the man on top of me as he tore my clothes, you know you want it sweet cheeks, common let Papi have it. Please not like this I begged but the man wouldn't listen as he forced himself into me.
Nooooooooo I screamed out, jerking up from the bed, I looked around in fear, it was a nightmare, a nightmare that really happened. Tears started falling down my cheeks again.
My door opened with force and mum ran in looking scared.
"Are you alright baby?" she asked joining me on the bed.
"No, " I shook my head, hugging her tight.
"Oh, my darling," she said wiping my eyes. "Do you want me to lay with you?"
"Yes, " I nodded my head.
She lay down before drawing me down with her as my head laid on her chest.
"What are we going to do mum?" I asked again.
"We are going to report it to the police, " she said robbing her hand over my back.
My heart skipped and started racing, I wasn't sure I wanted to go to the police, it will require me recounting the incidence and that's the last thing I want, I rather forget the whole thing if possible.
"Mum do we really need to?" I asked softly.
"Yes, darling, we can't allow him to get away with what he has done."
"OK, " I agreed, closing my eyes but not willing to fall asleep again, as am scared of dreaming about the incident again.
Outside the police station, the next day, I sat with a mum inside the car as we watched people enter and leave the station. I was filled with trepidation and wanted to be anywhere else but here.
"Are you ready?" mum asked giving me a reassuring look.
I just nodded my head not saying a thing as we both stepped down from the car.
I walked face down unable to look anyone in the face scared they will all know what happened, scared to see them staring at me in pity.
"We here to make a complaint" mum said to the officer at the front station. He was a very overweight middle-aged African American man who really should lay off the doughnut currently stuffed in his mouth.
"What's about ma?" The officer asked with an uninterested and bored look on his face that was pissing me off.
MA glanced my way drawing his attention to me and seeing the state I was in must have clued him in.
"Right this way MA, " the officer said leading us further into the station.
The whole place was a buzz of activities as policemen came in and went with suspects with some of them screaming profanities and proclaiming their innocence. The whole pandemonium helped distract me from the ordeal coming next till their voices were silenced all of a sudden bringing me back to reality.
The office we entered had a female officer behind the seat her head bent as she read something off the computer in front of her. She looked beautiful and very confident behind her desk.
"Detective Crook, these folks here would like to tell you something" the officer that brought us in said, drawing her attention away from the computer to us.
"You can have a seat ma, " she said her gaze including me as she directed us to a seat.
If not for the situation I would have found it hilarious that an officer of the law is bearing the name crook.
"So how can I help you ma?" she said in a kind tone matching the soft look in her eyes which helped me relax and the fact she was a woman was an added bonus.
"My daughter was raped last night by her date," mum said in a flat tone that didn't disguise the underlying rage she is feeling, luckily the officer didn't react in any way to my mum's words as her face remained expressionless.
I knew mum was mad about what happened to me but has been keeping calm for my sake.
"What happened?" the detective asked directing her question to me.
And here comes the reason why I didn't want to come here, I didn't want to relieve the incident which is what's gonna happen if I tell them what happened.
I started hyperventilating, trying to take in the air was proving difficult which further scared me worsening my situation.
"Baby calm down, " mum begged, pulling me into her arms in a bid to calm me down.
"You don't have to tell me everything now, just start with the parts you are ready to tell and the rest will follow when you are ready, " the detective said in a calm voice.
A few minutes later I was able to calm myself and moved out of mum's arms.
Can I get you water the detective asked I nodded my head?
Be right back she said leaving and silence reigned in the room.
Mum didn't know to want to say and I didn't want to talk unless I needed to.
I sat slumped in my seat wriggling my hands together as we waited for the detective.
The door opened and she walked back in bearing in her hand a glass of water which she offered me.
"Thanks, " I whispered clutching the glass in both hands as I took a sip from it.
"Are you okay to start now?" she asked softly with no emotions on her face.
I took a deep breath and opened my mouth to start, I felt mums hand the only lap giving me strength.