Realizing His Heart
"Ana. What name you have decided for the baby. It's now 7 months. And what gender it is. " Darina's mother questioned Anastasia smiling happily.
"I didn't try to find the gender I wanted to know on the day of his or her birth. " She said caressing her belly with a small smile but soon her smile fade away when Mrs Black said something
"Ana my daughter you look weak and pale. What's happening to you. You should be gaining weight not losing it. Aren't you eating properly and where is this stubborn son of mine he's not here for you. How irresponsible of him. "
She said as she glared at nothing clearly mad at her son for not taking good care of his wife.
"Relax mom. He had work and also I am perfectly fine don't worry. " Mrs. Black only sighed heavily before frowning when Anastasia said something
"Mom can you promise me something. " Mrs. Black looked at her for sometime before nodding her head.
"No matter if I am here or not but please love your grandson or granddaughter more than anything. Please" Mrs. Black instantly turned towards her in concern.
Caressing her hands " Ana everything is alright. Right? You're not hiding anything right ." Anastasia smiled at her widely before shaking her head
"Of course mom everything is perfect don't worry I am perfect. " Mrs. Black was still hesitant but at last nodded her head. Anastasia sighed but soon the cup in her hands fell on the floor.
Her face scrunched in pain as she placed her hand on her stomach feeling a pool of massive pain all over her body.
She let out a small scream following with several screams instantly scaring Mrs Black. "Ana what happened Oh my God Your water broke. "
She instantly called the driver and took screaming and moaning in pain Anastasia to hospital. Mrs. Black was trembling in concern because it was only her 7th month and her water already broke.
Looking at the phone blankly I cut the call. It was from my business partners. Today I had a meeting but I was too much messed up from my mind that I know I can't handle this meeting.
Concentration was far away from me. I wanted to know the way how to convince Ana. How to make her accept me with who I am..
I know she's doing this because she's tired of gaining my love but what should I do, my heart and I just can't help it. Wish I could pull this heart out and fell on my knees in front of her.
Sighing heavily I stared blankly at the picture in my hand. It was mine and Ana wedding picture. I don't know why but I can't start anything without seeing this picture.
It was the best decision of my life. The decision of making this girl as my wife. This picture from the first day was in my office drawer. I never showed to anyone but I always start my day after seeing this picture.
But now I realized that this picture wasn't the reason of my successful business. It was the soft smile and beautiful voice of hers which I every day before coming to the office used to hear and see.
And from the day she stopped showing herself on breakfast even talking to me, I realized how miserable I am without her.
That night when I slept on her shoulder was the last time I had a peaceful sleep. But when I woke up my peace was snatched away seeing an empty bed and no one near me.
That day I wanted to feel her in my arms till she wakes up. That day was the first time when I felt not leaving the bed and just stare at her but she wasn't there.
So this is how it feels. Seeing the one you wanted to awake with. If he or she wasn't there besides you this is how it felt. It's so damn disappointing and painful.
And that poor girl was doing this for the past 3 years. She always woke up alone in the bed as I used to shower before her. I never thought it can hurt this bad.
My thoughts fade away when Andrew entered the room "Hey Darian. Why didn't you come to the meeting? Our partners were asking for you I had to lie to them that you're not feeling well."
I sighed shaking my head but got a heavy sigh from him as well. " Andrew can I ask you how you fell for Emily when you loved your girlfriend so much. "
He chuckled at my words " Yes I loved my girlfriend a lot but after seeing that she was just playing and time passing with me. My love fades away and turned into you can say emptiness. Like no hate no love I no longer felt anything for her when I married Emily. "
I gave him a full attention "Emily and I had a very hard time. Emily fell for me first and confessed but I was too coward to accept it that I had already fallen for her. But then one day she said that she can't hold me back for so long. She can't keep on forcing me to remain in this loveless marriage. That time something inside me clicked so bad when I thought of her leaving me."
"I ran towards her room and saw her packing her bags. Without thinking anything I kissed her and fell on my knees confessing my true feelings for Her. The fear of her leaving me made me realized my love for her. Made me realized that I can't live without her. I am nothing without her. "
He completed his words making me questioned many things "Tell me, Darian, what if Anastasia left you. I mean the way she's behaving it seems like she's planning to be separated from you. "
My head snapped towards him glaring at him "Never. Anastasia promised me that she will never leave me. I know she will never. "
"And why wouldn't she. I mean she's human as well. What if she got tired of you and decided to end this loveless relation. "
I shook my head standing up and removing my tie. I felt my breathing getting heavy thinking of her leaving me. I can't even imagine my life without her anymore. She has become a part of my breathing.
"She can't leave me. Stop saying it. I wouldn't let her leave me. She loves me. " I heard his chuckle full of sarcasm.
"Why wouldn't she. Loving a person and keep on compromising are different things. And what your doing right now. I am sure one day she will leave you. "
I slammed the tie on the floor glaring at him breathing heavily. I felt my veins popping out of my neck. My jaw was clenched tightly.
"I said she can't leave me. I wouldn't let her leave me. She's mine and she will never leave me. " I spat in anger as my temper was losing. My voice started to get louder clearly warning him to not push my buttons.
"And why can't she. Why you want her. Huh. Why can't you let her go? WHY ARE YOU USING HER FOR YOUR OWN SATISFACTION. "
"SHUT THE FUCK UP ANDREW. I AM NOT USING HER. "
"THEN WHY ARE YOU KEEPING HER STILL. WHY CAN'T YOU JUST LET HER GO. "
"I WILL NEVER LET HER GO. "
"WHY. WHY CAN'T YOU LET HER GO."
"BECAUSE I FUCKING LOVE HER. "
Both of our breathing was unstable. I didn't even notice where my anger took me and I said something which I thought I would never be able to say again.
"I-I l-love her. I love A-Anastasia. I --- " I was thinking about my words till I felt a pat on my shoulder. Heaving my head up I looked at smiling Andrew who was looking satisfied.
"See. Sometimes we don't realize our feelings till we realized our fear. You feared to lose her and that fear made you realize your heart's true feelings. Tell her before it's too late. Good luck."
He said winking at me and walking out of the room. Unexpectedly a wide smile appeared on my lips realizing the truth of my heart. That was the time I realized my heart.
"I love her. I love her so much. "
Shit Darian how can I be this blind. Just because of my fear to fall in love again I was too coward to witness that I already had fallen for her a long time ago.
It wasn't lust or attraction when I wanted to have her. It was love. I wanted to make her mine. I wanted to claim her wholely because I love her. I loved her from the day I took her the first time. When I claimed her everything.
But I was too afraid to accept it. Chuckling at my stupidity I laughed out. I can't believe I was so stupid. All this time her ignorance was hurting me because I love her. I missed her because I love her and can't stand her away from me. Because I fucking love her.
"Don't worry Ana. Today I will make it up to you. I will tell you. I will show you how much I love you. "
Smiling at the picture I placed a kiss on it. Don't worry love I will endure every punishment given by you for being this late but I promise I will show you, my love. I will treat you the way an angel like you deserves to be treated.
I was about to walk out of the room so I could go to our house but stopped when my phone started to ring.
"Hello, mom. I was about to ---" my words cut down when I heard her panicked voice.
"Son. Anastasia. " My heartbeat got fasten hearing Ana's name.
"What happened, mom. What happened to Ana. Is She alright? "
"No son. Her water broke. I am in the hospital they took her inside. I am scared Darian they are saying her condition is not good. " She said crying while my body started to tremble.
"But it's just a 7th month. How. Ok ok, relax mom. Which hospital I am coming. Yeah yeah, Ok I am coming. " I instantly ran towards the car starting the engine with my trembling hands.
"Relax Darian. Nothing will happen to my Ana. Please be safe love. "
That's why people say. Overcome your fear and realize how precious your efforts are before your fear ends up eating you leaving no space for efforts.
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