You're so sweet to me
Ellie’s head rests right in the middle of my chest, the rest of her sprawled out on top of me. Her hands curled pressing against her reddened cheek, and her light silky hair fell in loose waves down her back.
As she sleeps, I study her with captivation. My hands draw shapes against her delicate skin. Even in her sleep, her breathing picks up from my touch, a slight increase in her chest, and a twitch of her pink lips.
Bursts of adoration take over my senses, the emotion remarkably distinct.
A smile quirks on the corners of my lips. How Ellie is so beautiful I still can’t understand. But she is and that’s just how it is.
Her small body begins to tremble against my own, her hands slowly tighten as quiet murmurs fall from her lips. Her face contorts in pain, her eyebrows furrowing as her lips twist. She’s having a nightmare...another one. “No.” She suddenly whimpers. “Help him.” She cries.
“Ellie,” I call, gently shaking her. I need to wake her up. “Ellie, wake up,” I say again, alarm seeping into my tone.
“Please.” She whimpers again.
Her body shifts, but still she does not wake up. A tear escapes her closed eye, and my chest tightens. “Ellie,” I repeat louder, shaking her. Her body stills. “Open your eyes baby.”
Her blue eyes flutter open, squinting. “D-Declan?” She stutters.
“I’m right here.” I murmur, pulling her up on my lap to sit upright. She scoots in closer, her eyes red and puffy. “I’m right here,” I say again.
She shivers, more tears falling from her eyes. “D-D-Declan, I-I—.” She chokes into my shirt.
I hold her against me tight, she needs to know I’m here. “Shhh, it’s okay.” I coo, running my fingers through her soft hair. Her tears slide down my chest as she cries and hiccups against me. I feel completely helpless, she doesn’t deserve these bad dreams.
“I love you.” I coo to my baby. “I love you, I love you, I love you.”
Ellie wasn’t a good sleeper, some nights she stayed up for hours on end because her brain wasn’t ready to sleep. Once in awhile she had nightmares like this one and woke up terrified by how real they seemed. But then there were nights where she cuddled into me and just passed out. Every night was different.
Soon enough her hiccups lessen and her salty tears subside. Her small fists hold my shirt tight. I lower my chin and kiss her forehead, she peeks up at me with her swollen eyes. Gently, I plant kisses along her nose, the corners of her lips, the apples of her cheeks, and lastly her jaw.
Her glossy lips simper into a small smile, even when she cried she still looked so beautiful. “You’re so sweet to me.” She whispers.
I brush my hand along her tear-stained cheek. “Well, you are my baby.” She looks down, cheeks awfully flushed. “D.”
“Ellie,” I say back.
She sighs softly, then raises her hands and rubs her puffy eyes. A small hiccup falls from her lips, the nightmare still affecting her. My eyes narrow in on her right hand, her knuckles just beginning to bruise. What the hell is that from?
I take her right hand and pull it towards my face, examining the bruise. “What’s this from?” I ask.
She pulls her hand back, so I let her. “I-I fell.” She says nervously. My eyes lift to her face. She fell? When did she fall? Why is she nervous? “You fell?”
“Y-Yeah.” She whispers, not meeting my eyes.
“How?” I question.
She bites her bottom lip, her hands fiddling. Is she lying? Because it sure as hell seems like it. “You didn’t fall,” I state, calling her out.
Her eyes widened. “I did.”
In one quick motion, I flip her onto the bed, hands pinned above her head, I hover over her. My eyes scan her face, why won’t she just tell me? Did somebody do this to her? Why lie about it? “Don’t Ella, don’t lie to me,” I say, irritation clear in my voice.
Her eyes stare into my own, fresh tears forming. “I did it.” She croaks so quietly like she didn’t want me to hear it.
My eyes widen. She did it? “What do you mean you did it?” An almost growl.
Droplets slide down her cheeks, her chest heaves like she’s about to cry. She closes her eyes, not looking at me. “I-I couldn’t t-think, it w-was too quiet.”
She was hurting herself, my Ellie, my baby was hurting herself. I let go of her wrists and once again pulled her into my chest. Pain clenches in my stomach as my chest squeezes. Why would she hurt herself? “Next time you call me Ellie, you hear me?” I demand.
“You were working.” She mumbles.
I wanted to punch something so fucking bad. Panic was suddenly sitting in my stomach, anger swirling all around me. How could I have not seen this? “I don’t fucking care, you call me. Tell me you will.” I order.
She glances up at me, the look innocent. “I will D.”
I take her hand once again, brushing my fingers along her knuckles. Lifting her hand up, I kiss the newly spreading bruise. “Don’t hurt yourself.” I plead. “swear to me you won’t.” I say, keeping my eyes on her, waiting for her response.
She peers down, guilt written all over her face. “I’m sorry.” She mumbles.
“Swear to me, Ella.”
More tears fall out her eyes, her hair clings to the edges of her pretty face. Holding her hand tightly, I wait for her to say it, trying my best to be patient. After a long moment, she releases a breath, “I s-swear.”
I wipe away her falling tears from her shining eyes, then kiss her red cheeks. “I’m not going anywhere Ellie, ever. If you need me, you will have me.”
The morning sun bleeds into the Declan’s bedroom stirring me from my sleep. I slowly sit up rubbing my eyes, and as I do memories of last night come flooding back to me. Tons of guilt comes with it. Declan wasn’t supposed to know about my hand, he doesn’t need that extra stress. But he’s Declan, he knows everything when it comes to me.
I glance around Declan’s bedroom searching for him, he’s not in here, he must have already woken up. As I listen I hear Declan’s voice in the apartment, he’s talking to someone.
“What do you mean somebody hammered a fucking nail into my tire?” He asks, his tone sounding very irritated.
For a moment it’s silent then, “Yeah, whatever bye.” He mutters.
Somebody hammered a nail into his tire? Who would do that? Footsteps sound down the hall, becoming louder as he gets closer. He slowly twists his bedroom doorknob carefully, then slides the door open slowly so the creeks are quiet.
Declan steps in, his vibrant eyes finding me. “You’re awake.” He states, still wearing his athletic shorts from last night and of course, has not yet put on a shirt.
“I just woke up.” My voice comes out raspy. Stupid ugly morning voice!
He hums, watching me, well looking me up and down. His gaze has me heating up in mere seconds. He strides over towards me, not once taking his eyes off of me. I’m suddenly very still, frozen under his intense stare.
He climbs up on the bed, crawling towards me. His hands find my face, cupping my cheeks, eyes searching mine. Then his gaze falls to my chapped lips, and I can’t help but bite them.
He grins, showing his perfect smile before landing his lips on top of my own. He kisses me in a way that makes my mind spin, a fuzzy feeling erupting like confetti. My hands tangle into his chocolate hair, tugging the curls with my fingers.
Suddenly I’m falling back onto the bed and Declan’s hovering over me. My skin blazes, like Declan’s the sun radiating heat right through me. His green eyes sparkle in a way that makes me want to lose my mind, he looks at me like nobody else does.
“You’re so goddamn beautiful.” He says. “Every single fucking centimeter.”
I turn away feeling very shy. His hand brushes the side of my face, “I mean it.” He coos, his voice full of honesty, “You don’t have to look away from me, I want to see you. I want to see every single emotion that crosses that pretty face.”
I look back at him. “I’m yours D, I’m all yours.”
The look that crosses his face, has my stomach flipping. The smile melts my heart. Again, his lips smother my skin, trailing kisses along my jaw and down my neck. At the same time, his hands brush down my sides to my stomach. In no time his rough skin comes in contact with my own, his hands sliding under my shirt, tracing my belly button.
My fingers run down the hard lines of his back.
Tingles shock me like set off fireworks scorching art into the sky. Every part of me is immersed in him, the way his fingers graze my prickling skin and the way he brings clarity to my noisy head. He’s my crystal clear in my world of perpetual thoughts.
Declan’s teeth graze my ear. “You have all of me, Ellie, I promise you that.” He whispers, voice husky.
Unspoken feelings radiate, swelling the air. Heat, a stimulation between us. We interweave as one, he as mine and I as his.
Lips touch, fingers feel, and toes curl.
Hot, my shirt comes off. Declan’s body against my own, his mouth erasing all insecurities. His words murmuring beautiful truths. Together, we share an intoxicating high.
A final kiss, stealing the air from both our lungs. He smiles, breathing hard, watching me with stunning eyes. His bare chest against my own, skin against skin.
Without all the movement I’m suddenly nervous at this stillness, he’s watching me, staring at me. He sits up and I instinctively cover my chest, the openness quite scary with the space from him off of me.
He frowns, “Don’t cover yourself up.” He says, placing his hands on mine. “Not with me, you are magnificent baby.” He murmurs, “You are so fucking gorgeous, don’t ever hide it.”
Slowly I remove my arms. He takes my hand, squeezing it. “Much better.”
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