24. Too late to apologize
Two months had passed since Alex thought she was doing well in ending her relationship with Elianna, but each day that God gave her the chance to see seemed more and more like a nightmare. The brunette had taken on the bad habit of dating different girls every two weeks, valiantly earning the nickname of ‘Suborneuse’ in the tabloids that seemed to always follow her since her mother’s surprising statement revealing her true identity as Infinity Rangers, she had left her condominium in favor of a university dormitory just to stop hearing her sister lecture her on her behavior. The only thing that didn’t seem to have changed in her life was the family dinner and the meeting with the shareholders that Albert was forcing her to attend, just like that night when she was forced to watch Ryan play perfect husband with Elianna.
When the dinner was over, Alex pretended to have homework so she could leave soon. Elianna watched the brunette sneak in her grandfather’s office, most likely looking for a bottle of Brandi, another bad habit the blonde had noticed about her ex-lover and even approached her to lecture her but didn’t get much effect.
Once back home, Alex calls her new and soon-to-be ex-fuck-buddy, freshly fished on campus to cheer her up.
Elianna was doing the same with her husband who had forgiven her for her mistakes and really believed their marriage would only come out stronger. But seeing Elianna’s bloodshot eyes and considering the fact that she had just spent an hour in the bathroom, pretending to take a shower after they had made love for the first time since they had gotten back together, Ryan understood that the blonde’s heart was no longer so untamable, it already belonged to a certain brunette.
“Elianna are you okay?” Ryan asks knowing what was going on.
“Yes, I’m fine” The blonde joins him in the bed, turning her back to her husband.
“Was it that horrible to sleep with your husband?” The cold tone of the man behind her back made her shiver. “Can you fucking look at me” Elianna got out of bed, tears in her eyes not knowing what to do with herself because she also thought she was done with Alex.
“I forgave you for having an affair with my little sister because I also had my dose of stupid decisions, I admit I am not perfect, I cheated on you more than once. But I’m doing the impossible to make you happy because I love you but yet I am not enough for you. Come on I want you to say it out loud, I am not enough for you”
“Please stop” With a whisper Elianna begged hi; to stop screaming.
“No I want to hear you say out loud what’s going on in your heart” With the back of his hand he hit the glass of water on the bedside table.
Elianna knocked on the door and didn’t wait a second before hugging her best friend as soon as the latter opened the door.
“Elianna?” Her friend walks her into her living room and kicks her boyfriend out, instructing him to pay the taxi that brought Elianna at hers.
Returning to the living room with a box of chocolate ice cream, she sat down next to her friend to comfort her.
“I tried, I really wanted it to work but I felt... I felt ..”
“Hey calm down. You will tell me all about it tomorrow, for now you’re going to relax ok?” The two girls spent the evening on the couch after emptying several bottle of alcohol and ice.
The next day at around 11 am, Rachel opens her door and finds herself in front of Ryan.
“What the hell do you want?” She encloses the door behind her so as not to wake Elianna.
“So I take it she told you everything and obviously I am the bastard of story”
“No, I figured that out on my own, you’re lucky I am hangover or else I’ll kick your ass” Raven screamed and ended up massaging her forehead to make the migraine go away.
“I just want to apologize, I understood that our marriage has no longer a chance but you can’t blame me for trying. I might be a bastard but I love this woman and that’s why I’m willing to let her go if that’s what it takes to make her happy that I don’t want anything else” Ryan bowed his head in an attempt to hide the tears that were forming in his eyes.
“You are ready to let her go”
“No, but I have to do it, our marriage hadn’t been nothing but a big lie I just refused to see the truth. And even though they don’t know yet, Alex and Elianna are meant to be. She has to get back with Alex”
“Go tell that your little sister. And then why do you think you have to choose who Elianna is to be with? First Alex forces her to get back with you and now you want her to get back with that selfish bastard?”
“Alex did what?” Ryan asked completely astonished.
“You are really stupid you. If Elianna got back with you it was because Alex made her promise to make you happy even if it made her unhappy because you are her brother. I think neither of you deserve Elianna”
“I didn’t know that.” Rachel snatched Elianna’s phone out Ryan’s hand before slamming the door on his face. The latter was still completely lost not knowing why her sister would give up her love just to make him happy.
Ryan goes to join Alex at the boxing gym not far from the campus, where he know the brunette used to go thee after class. Seeing her little sister on the ring, Ryan equipped himself with a glove for a round.
“Ready for a round little sister.” Alex turned to face her brother who was grinning at her.
“Half-sister” Ryan continued to tease her sister who refused to fight him by throwing punch at her. Until he talks about having fucked Elianna the day before, a sentence that earned him a KO with one punch. Alex was shaking with anger, sitting on top of her brother ready to rust him.
“Ohh looks like I struck a chord.” Alex breathed heavily, realizing that this is exactly what her brother expected. Forcibly ripping off her gloves, the brunette took her bag; dressed only in basketball shorts and a Calvin Klein sports bra.
“Ok ok ok. I am sorry” The brunette did not say a word and continued her way towards the exit followed very closely by her brother “Alex!”
“WHAT? Are you here to wiggle the knife?” Alex was on the verge of tears.
“No. Actually, last night with Elianna ..” Alex started walking again but Ryan stopped her by grabbing her arm. “..It was not that good” The man admitted uncomfortably.
“Yes we had sex. But then she started crying and I started screaming and throwing stuff on the floor then she ran off to Rachel’s house for the rest of the night. And ....yep”
“Oh” Confused the brunette asked. “Why are you telling me this?”
“From what I know you broke up with her because of me, you thought it would makes me happy I thought too but I can’t stand seeing her like that .. I already made an appointment with the family lawyer for the divorce»
“Albert wont let you do that you know?”
“That only Elianna and I’s problem not Grandad’s. And I’m sure you two will get back together our two families have nothing to worry about their inheritances.” Ryan patted his sister on the shoulder before getting into his car.
“I would like to be as optimistic as you”
The next day Alex was trying her luck with Elianna during the two hour during the meeting.
“May I know what the hell are you doing?” The blonde whispered between her teeth so as not to draw attention to them. She had known that Alex had been up to something since she had taken a seat in the chair to her left contrary to the last few months where the youngest had avoided her like she had some kind of disease. But she couldn’t imagine that she would treat her like one of her girls picked up on the campus. Elianna slapped Alex’s hand as she ventured onto her leg and changed places for the rest of the meeting. When the meeting ended, Alex followed the blonde into the elevator and did not to hold the elevator back for the old gentleman who was rushing towards them.
“Oops” She smiled, turning to the blonde who remained stoic. “Now let’s talk” She presses the e-stop for the elevator. “I really need to talk to you but you don’t make it any easier at all”
“Stop fooling around Alex, I’m not in the mood”
“I know but I need to tell you something. I love you Elianna” The blonde was silent for a few moments to analyze the situation.
“I know” Alex smiles and walks over to Elianna. “But that’s not enough.” Alex pulled back confused again. “You know, every time someone talks about love, I will think of you. Because that’s what you are, my one and only love. But loving you is so hard, you made me realized that love is not always synonymous of happiness. And I want to be happy. You were a breath of fresh air in a world where I felt trapped because of my name, you convinced me to believe it, that I could be much more than Elianna Rothschield or Elianna Brighton, that I could simply be Elianna, be me and only think about myself first, that I deserved much better and I believed in it, that’s why I have to let you go because you run away whenever it gets too complicated or too real ”
“Elianna ... what are you talking about?”
“Even if what we had was not a relationship in itself. Every time we broke up, something that happened to me more times in just 5 months than in my entire life, every time we broke up you had some exuses ”
“Yes, but it was for obvious reasons. It was so as not to hurt ...”
“Ryan? Your mother, your sister? The feelings of everyone around you matter. Everyone except me. You never wondered how I felt. I am saying this just to blame you but just for you to understand that you are toxic to me I need time and space away from you or Ryan or anyone else, something I have never done since I was a teenager I knew who I was going to marry I resigned until the day I saw you lying in our guest room. Now I’m free”
“Look, I’m sorry if I hurt you, but you can believe me when I say that was not my intention at all” Elianna turns the elevator back on and turns to Alex.
“I love you.” Elianna admitted for the first time in a long time, and put a hand against Alex’s face, who was grinning wide, and rested her forehead against hers. The blonde gently unwrapped Alex’s arms around her and took a step back. Eyes full of sadness, her last words before leaving the elevator were. “But I don’t think you are ready to accept all the love I would like to offer you and I can’t half love you” Alex was upset because what kept them from being together wasn’t Ryan or anyone else but Elianna herself had given up on them.
In the evening Alex was in the new bar that just opened its doors, behind a piano she remembered the time Elianna was trying to teach her how to play. She caressed the keyboard and naturally the only notes she had learned began to run through the air and thus draw attention to her. Her glass placed on the piano, she began to sing the words that came from her heart and reflected how she felt. She arrived at a moment when the words refused to come out since she was sobbing, from the corner of the bar, Asha came to take her sister in her arms.
“I love her so much Asha. I love her yet I broke her heart and now it’s too late, she’s moving on” Asha accompanied her sister to her dormitory away from all the curious looks they were making object.
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