The next morning, Thursday, I have the day off and can cuddle into Lewis’s chest like I’ve wanted. We’re in bed again, Lewis having thought ahead and brought some extra clothes in case I wanted him to stay over. He had changed into a pair of thin pajama pants that have Deadpool and bloody swords on them and he wears the tank top he had on, the tear stains dried and mostly disappeared. I’m on my side with my back to his chest, having shifted sometime during sleep, Lewis’s arm is wrapped protectively- possessively- around my middle with his hand in a loose fist against my chest. Whenever I shift his arm tightens and draws me impossibly closer. I can feel the warmth of his breath on the back of my head, my hair softly shifting with each exhale, his head is practically buried in my hair.
His legs are tangled with mine, and I blush a deep red when I move my hips and I feel him pressed against my bottom. He isn’t hard or anything, I do recognize that he’s half-filled out, any movements I made probably simulated him a tiny bit. In response to my movement, I hear him softly grunt and he shifts as if in an attempt to get closer than we are. He noses deeper into my hair and sighs, completely relaxing on the mattress when he’s confident I won’t move again. I find it adorable, Lewis is as much of a cuddler as I am and it’s strangely nice to be treated like a stuffed animal and hugged on while he’s deep asleep.
I want to keep waking up to this, want Lewis to stay here and not go to his apartment. It’s way too soon to ask if he can move in with me though, we aren’t even official yet I feel as if a simple request to make it so, would be granted. I just need to ask, although the thought puts a strike of anxiety through me. What if Lewis wants a date a little more before we’re official? He acts like we’re in a relationship, an official exclusive one, with how he always cuddles against me and the nicknames and his actions. I love it, but also think it may be best to wait another few months, see how the Miss Parry situation goes.
I’d like to know if we’d be okay or beyond the limit of what each of us could take. If we make it past whatever Miss Parry has planned and the drama that she brings, then maybe I’ll ask to be Lewis’s boyfriend. If we don’t think we can handle any more of her schemes, then there’s always the friend zones we agreed to be trapped in. Either way, Lewis will be in my life and that makes me happy. Whether he’s my partner or friend, I’m sure he’ll still care for me as he does, minus the touching and nicknames and nuzzling if it’s the friend zone.
I hope we make it through whatever lies ahead of us, whatever Miss Parry does, or any other situation that pops up and causes issues. I’m unsure how strong Lewis’s feelings for me are, in a romantic sense, and even if he is cuddly and clingy in an adorable way, he could still only like me enough to give me limited chances. With how Miss Parry is being, I’m not positive that I have many more of those chances left. Lewis doesn’t appear to be planning on leaving any time soon though, he isn’t distant with me and, if anything, he’s doing the exact opposite. He’s been all over me in the recent days and had happily kissed me speechless when I declared that he could have kisses again after the crying session was over and I had cleaned my face. He deserved a reward for being such a good tissue slash pillow.
Overall, Lewis seems completely ready to stay for the long run. He hasn’t given any sign that what Miss Parry is doing is any bother to him, except for the anger releasing fight he had with Seán. I’ve only seen him genuinely upset and angry a few times and he’s been able to keep from snapping or starting a fight with my boss, either physically or with words. I find that impressive because I’ve learned from experience that when someone is in, or close to, rage mode, it’s hard to rein in control. Either that or Lewis is just actually trying to be a decent human being and not beat up weaker people who can’t fight back properly.
Seán can fight back and even help Lewis calm down by giving him something to distract and let the Scotsman release his frustration and anger, I don’t count that as fighting. I call that a brother helping a brother before he could get hurt or hurt someone else. From how Lewis had instantly thought to go to Seán first when he realized he needed to punch something, I’m safely assuming they’ve done it before and I’m positive Lewis helped Seán in the same way. It’s merely a fight to get out anger and frustration without causing too much damage to property or people, they know each other, know when enough is enough and when to keep going. Sure, they could go at it rougher, harder, and create a challenge for each other, but it’s only because they are comfortable with the other man.
It’s reassuring, that Lewis won’t turn into someone who uses his fist to solve problems and when he needs to use said fist, he has someone to go to that will help him calm down. I never thought of him of that, never thought he’d be one of those people that handle issues with violence. He uses his brain and can come to easy and simple solutions that don’t require a fist or a boot to the ribs. If someone provokes him, as the man that he kicked out from the cafe had, then he has every right to show them he isn’t all bark and no bite. I’d encourage that, even. Mainly because seeing him fight or just completely handle a man that had either talked shit about him or, it could be about me, someone saying the wrong thing about me or talking suggestively and Lewis snaps at them because I’m his. It’s a wet dream and I’m sure if I saw him fight, actually fight not a single jab, I’d tackle him afterward and kiss him hard enough to bust our lips then precede to let him fuck me anywhere he wanted. At least, it’s what happens in my imagination. Real-life I’d kiss him and be too anxious to fuck in public.
Is Lewis into public fucking? I mean, we haven’t spoken about kinks or anything very sexual besides the night Ryan came over when Lewis offered to help my issue. We should have that conversation, it’s been close to two months now, only a few weeks or so before December. I don’t feel as anxious as when we went on that first date that Dunkin Donuts but it is still there, lurking in the back of my mind and threatening to overtake. If he isn’t into any of my kinks it isn’t a deal-breaker, unless he sees them as one. I can live without them and have sex without them, but I’d prefer to have them available to me if I wanted to perform one.
I’m not sure if Lewis has any, I know he prefers a collar and leash without being told he does, and he watches my mouth and lips sometimes when I’m rambling on about something. If he does have more fetishes he may be open to some of mine and be willing to try the list I’ve gathered of things I’m curious about and want to try. I watched a lot of porn and read things, some of the kinks made me curious.
I know I won’t go back to sleep, too curious and slightly anxious and wanting to get this conversation done with. Lewis is still sleeping, deeply so, and I’d need to wake him if I want this over. He grunts when I shuffle to turn around to be face to face with him- well, face to neck. Once I stop moving, he huffs a breath and tightens his arm on me. He acts like a big animal when he’s asleep and sometimes during the day, grunting and huffing. It’s adorable.
He makes a sound in his throat that sounds like a disgruntled groan when I poke his stomach with a whispered ‘Lewy’. The Scotsman just shuffles closer and presses his face between the top of my head and the pillow, arms tugging me to be against his chest as if that would satisfy me enough to keep quiet. A giggle comes from me as I poke him twice more and say his name a bit louder. This time, Lewis makes a noise that reminds me of a growling bear, the sound isn’t a growl, as close to one as a human could get and extremely hot.
“Go ta sleep, ya wee brat.” Is what his thickened accented voice mutters into my hair and it only earns another laugh.
Reaching up, I softly tug at his beard, trying to gain his attention and wake him up. I put on my best pout and make my voice as bratty as the situation calls for. “I wanna talk to you.”
He huffs but I feel his thumb start moving in circles on my lower back and know I won, he can’t say no to me when he’s half asleep. His eyes aren’t open, yet he releases a deep sigh that one does when they’re reluctant to wake up. “What ya wanna talk ’bout, boy?”
I rush out the answer, knowing if I don’t I might back out. “Kinks. Sex- sexual kinks, ya know, things that turn you on or something. Fetishes, are they the same thing? Kinks and fetishes? People say them like they’re different but I never know if they are or not-”
Lewis clicks his tongue and my words cut off before I process the sound, feeling his chest shift with a silent laugh at how quick I stopped myself to give my attention to him. His eyes are finally open and he had pulled back to be able to watch me, a tired smirk on his lips. I do feel slightly guilty I’m waking him up, he had to leave to go to work yesterday and had called me at eleven, as usual, asking if I wanted him here with me and Ryan. He had gotten in bed with me after his shower closer to twelve and had hummed to me until I went to sleep, but he can sleep after this conversation, I know I plan to.
“What ’bout them? Wanna tell me ya’s?”
I stare at his chest as I feel myself go red in both embarrassment and anxiety, even as I nod quickly. Lewis hums, leaning closer to me to place a kiss on my forehead. “Sure bout that? Seemed scared last time.”
Inhaling and letting out a long sigh, I assure myself and him, “I- It needs to happen sometime, and sure, I’m scared how you’ll react to one in specific but they are not deal breakers and I can live without them. I just need to tell you and I wanna know if you have any and if you’ll be willing to explore my list of things I’m curious about. I mean, we don’t have to but I thought it’d be good for our relationship, ya know, and-”
Another click and a slight tug on my hair get me to pause and take another breath, glancing up at Lewis but only seeing his amused eyes and his smirk. “Calm. We’ll talk. Ya want me to go first?”
Sheepishly, I nod and busy myself with playing with his beard as he speaks, running my fingers in it and freeing tangles that snag them, lightly tugging it. He doesn’t make me stop, watching me do it, “I’m open ta anythin that isn’t bathroom-related. Piss and anythin of the like is a limit. Like collars, leashes, cock warming, anythin that plays into the power exchange. I’ll help ya with that list of yours, but I need to see it.”
I relax somewhat hearing that he’s open to trying things, hearing his limit is bathroom kinks is also relieving although it places the question of if he’d be okay with forcing me to hold my bladder as I had thought of vaguely. Not that it matters if he isn’t comfortable with that sort of thing, it was just a wandering thought and I don’t need to act on it. But, it might be good to ask questions, get a better understanding even if it is much more embarrassing than the general topic.
Clearing my throat, it comes across as a cough instead and Lewis rubs my back. “Um- does that include holding, uh, bladder? I had- thought-”
“Thinkin of me forcin ya to hold ya bladder till I gave you permission.” It isn’t a question, a simple statement with an amused tilt to it. He hums when I confirm it with a short whine. “That’s good. Asking permission for things is one thing I expect from my sub, if ya want to ask to go to the bathroom, I don’t mind. Might even make ya sit and drink water all day, But no piss outside of that.”
My face, ears, and neck are deep pink; embarrassed yet also slightly aroused at the thought of Lewis messing with me like that, having me drink water then reject any question of going to the restroom. It isn’t the piss that gets me, it’s mainly the power exchange in it. Lewis demanding I drink more and more water, denying me any chance of taking care of a bladder until it hurts and finally allowing me the relief of taking care of the ache. The idea of pee is gross to me, doing anything with it isn’t for me, but I know there are people into it and I don’t like judging harshly. Power to them.
Lewis had also admitted to being a dominant that likes to be asked before the sub does something and it just makes him appear better for me because I love that. It adds to the exchange and I don’t get to anything other than listening to what Lewis said or had given me his permission to do. He can refuse me anything and the picture of being in the store shopping and asking to go grab something for him, only to have him promptly refuse it and keeping his hand on me or ordering me to push the kart. It’s strangely freeing to have someone there to give permission, I know what I’m supposed to do and I know I’m pleasing my dominant.
Lewis grunts, “Tell me yours.”
The demand isn’t said unkindly, his voice isn’t stern, soft, and curious yet still has an edge to it to warn me to focus since this was my idea. Figuring I should start small, I shuffle closer to him and say just loud enough to be heard. “Collars and leashes, I adore those. The comfort and feel of them, being led around and tugged and forced to do something- like kneel. It’s-really nice. Like, amazing.”
Lewis doesn’t speak but when I peek up at him he’s watching me with a smile, green eyes soft and light. He’s allowing me to speak freely, to get what I need off my chest before he comments. He remembers I stressed myself over this topic the first time we met and he’s making sure I get to say my peace. I smile at him, a small one that feels nervous as I start up with his beard again, playing with it to distract myself.
“I, uh, have a thing for beards.” He smirks at that, gently digging his hairy chin into my hands to be pet even more. “I don’t know why, but it’s one of the first things I noticed when puberty hit. Suddenly popping a boner whenever a man with a beard or stubble walked by. It was hell.”
The Scotsman huffs a quiet laugh at that but doesn’t comment, allowing me to keep petting his chin and jaw. “Another thing was voices, really deep ones. My math teacher had one of the deepest I’ve ever heard, except for you and Seán. I always got a boner from him and it was so embarrassing! I’m pretty sure he knew something was up too because he had helped me on a test once and he talked directly in my ear, all whispering and rough like. I couldn’t look him in the eyes!”
Lewis raises his eyebrow, tightens his arms on me, and grasps out, voice stern and rough. “Keep goin, boy.”
Oh, right. Other men giving me boners is a big no-no. Possessive Viking Scotsman is who I’m dealing with. This reaction earns a shiver from me, very much on board with belonging to Lewis and his possessiveness. He seems unimpressed with my Math teacher giving me boners and other men with beards doing the same, which is oddly cute because he’s exactly a perfect match for both of my mentioned kinks. His beard is my favorite and his voice is pure heaven, no one can compare.
Although I do listen and skip ahead to another thing that interested me. This time I avoid his eyes altogether because this is one people usually find nasty. “So...I never tried this one but I read about it somewhere and it sounded so good that I had gotten off on it. The power exchange in it is amazing and I had ended up watching so much porn- I mean, a lot. But again, I have never done it with someone, I had just written it off as one of my kinks because I got off on it a ridiculous amount of times. Anyway, it’s called Cum Play I guess, and at first, I thought it was just sucking dick and, ya know, blowing bubbles or something with cum.”
Lewis snorts at the confession of cum bubbles and I pout at him, but he doesn’t move to say anything, nudging me to continue. “But...it’s not. I read about people getting cum baths, that’s mainly where people cum on them a bunch of times. There’s so much to do with it. What got me though was being loaded with as much as possible and plugged, kept like that all day then watching the loads pour out. I also liked the idea of drinking cum, and people cum on food then eat that, and that interested me enough I cummed for, like ever. Although I have seen others say that’s nasty and gross and just a bunch of negatives. So, yeah. I’d like that.”
He nods and kisses my head, nudging me again. I take a deep breath to prepare for this one, having to push other people’s words from the internet away and concentrate on Lewis. “And, um- this is a big secret because people are jerks, and the internet sucks. But, I’m- into Somnophilia.”
Lewis hums, not seeming bothered and I stare at him. Expecting a glare and him moving away from me. He does neither. He raises his eyebrow, “It isn’t bad, Tommy Boy.”
I can merely blink in surprise, mostly it’s stock that he is calm in the face of my biggest secret, that he isn’t upset with me over it. I’ve read that others think it’s non-consensual, and it can be if not spoken about beforehand and agreed on, but when it is talked about and a couple both give enthusiastic consent it shouldn’t be an issue. As long as both people agree on being fucked, or at least used sexually- blow job or rimming, I don’t see what is wrong with it. Of course, it could be used for non-consensual uses and that is horrible and should never happen to anyone. But if it’s a discussion the couple had and both had agreed on it, can stop it from happening in the future, I don’t think it’s an issue.
Another click from Lewis stops my train of thought for a moment, turning back to him and sudden;y asking, just to be sure, and completely ignoring that the click means he was going to speak. “Do you even know what it is?”
I get an unimpressed stare from Lewis, a sharp tug of my hair that earns a low whine. “Wait for me to talk before ya jump ta a conclusion.”
He loosens his grip when I nod shortly and apologize with a soft ‘Sorry, Lewy.’, realizing what the tiny punishment was for; ignoring the click of his tongue and what it means, stay quiet and give my attention to Lewis. He massages my scalp where he tugged, in case it stings, which it doesn’t. When he speaks, it’s in a tone that warns me not to interrupt him. “It’s fuckin someone when they sleep. After they give clear consent of what they want from their partner. It’s okay to like that, as long as you give full consent. Right, boy?”
“Yeah…” I don’t know whether to be relieved or not that he knows what Somnophilia is and that he knows it’s based on consent, at least me it is.
Lewis gives me a half smirk, stating, “Ya want me ta fuck you while ya sleep.”
I go pink again at that, whining and slapping at his chest in retaliation for embarrassing me further. Even so, I grudgingly agree with it. “Yeah...ya know, some time. Bucket list and all.”
He laughs at that, grinning as he rolls over, gaining a shocked giggle as I’m pinned under his weight. My leg is between his and his thigh is pressed roughly against my crotch, whole body against mine, all warm muscle and hair, and breath. He nuzzles into my neck, placing soft little kisses on my skin. None of it is sexual, could be very easily, but he’s going about this with innocent affection behind it, not sexual desire. I know this, am aware that he’s keeping to our agreement of sexual acts, and is only doing this because he simply wants to. But it doesn’t stop my cock from stirring to life.
Although Lewis appears to want to keep the conversation going as well because with his lips moving on my throat, he asks, “What do ya like bout it? Bein fucked while ya sleep.”
I gulp, that is a dangerous question with the position we’re in. My hands have moved to his back, absentmindedly sliding across thick muscles and skimming down his sides to sneak under his tank top which gets a soft sigh to be exhaled on my skin. My voice sounds hoarse to my own ears, a gasp forced out with the words when Lewis lightly nips my collar bone. “Uh- being used. Serving even in my sleep and providing pleasure. At least, that’s what I think when I watch or read porn. I-ah-haven’t had someone do it to me.”
Lewis smiles, I feel the change of his lips as he slides back up to my ear and begins nestling behind it. “Wanna be a good boy and serve. I’ll try it for ya, if we agree ta be an official couple and be careful with it. Not ta rush it.”
My head is nodding far quicker than I previously thought possible, but the promise in his voice fills me with so much hope that we’ll not only be a couple- be boyfriends, but he’ll give me something I’ve wanted to try since I first read it. I know he won’t ask to be official now, he’ll probably want to wait until Miss Parry’s drama is over and as much as it disappoints me, I agree with that. Make sure we still want to be a couple or see if we’re as compatible as we think we are. Learn more about each other and what we want, even if we both seem to have similar wants from the relationship; love and laughs mixed with the power dynamic.
Going into this too soon could be an issue, later on, it’s safer to just wait.
I don’t say anything, having already assumed what Lewis wanted, and continue to run my nails up and down his sides. He shutters and nips at my jaw, slowly pressing kisses around my face and occasionally depositing one on my lips. He never once shifts his hips but his huge hands follow the length of my torso to caress my jaw and side of my head gently. I’m unsure how long we stay in bed like this, swapping slow and innocent kisses that make me feel all warm and tingly and loved. Probably only minutes but it feels like hours, too focused on each other to pay attention to the time.
It isn’t until the door abruptly opens and Ryan is stumbling in, speaking, “Hey, Tom- oh”. Lewis pulls away from me, merely an inch or two but I still hold back a whine because he was just about to lock his lips to mine. Turning to look at my friend, ex, with a grump pout. Ryan is apple red with his eyes wide, flicking between the giant Scotsman on me to my, what has to be, tiny form under Lewis. He gulps, the sound interrupting the quiet room and his eyes get this fleeting glint that I can’t place.
Lewis grunts, louder than previously, to get Ryan to snap out of what trance he’s in. “Speak ya peace, boy.”
Ryan blushes, then blinks and throw a thumb behind him. “Miss Parry is here.”