Bòidheach - Beautiful
tha, a bheil e ag obair? - yes, does it work? (Might be wrong, google sucks sometimes)
Leannan - Sweetheart
I'm woken up by my front door slamming shut and, out of shock, my body jerks into a sitting position as I blink my eyes into focus. At first, I'm scared of an intruder coming in to steal anything or kill me. After a few seconds of watching my closed bedroom door, I realize it's CeCe. I had given her an extra key I case she needed me and her way of announcing her presence is slamming the door, never caring for my neighbors.
I had never necessarily given her a key, I was saving it for if I found a boyfriend. CeCe just took it and walked in one day with Taco Bell and pizza, announcing we were bingeing Netflix. I don't care if she stole it, she's my friend and she's never used it to do anything bad she's usually good at texting me that she's coming over. This is an example of how she wakes me up sometimes. She said she'd give it back when I found a boyfriend or a roommate, until then, she can keep it.
Rolling my eyes, I happen to turn my head towards my pillow when I see my phone. Suddenly, everything that had happened last night with Lewis flood my mind, and I snatch the device from the pillow. Checking the call history, I'm shocked when it says the call ended one hour ago. That means Lewis had stayed on the phone all night, either up and waiting if I needed to talk again or asleep with me.
It's only eleven-thirty, I should have time to get a shower and get dressed before going to the park. Although getting past CeCe will probably be a hassle if she has something planned, then again, she's always wanted me to meet new people. Telling her I have a date - it is a date, right?- will most likely make her excited and let me leave in peace.
Taking a deep breath and trying to ignore the heavy seed of doubt that has been planted in my brain, I slip off the bed and put my phone charge. I can hear CeCe going through my kitchen while I quickly pick out cute yet acceptable clothes, wanting Lewis to like the outfit. After setting the clothes on the unmade bed, I run to the shower in the bathroom across the hall.
Coldwater never bothered me except when it's fully snowing it helps waken me up when I step in the shower. I take short showers, especially when I fear I'll be late to something, only washing what needs to be washed; below the waist, armpits, and hair. Scrubbing hard enough it burns slightly, as an extra assurance I won't reek. I'm out in ten minutes and hastily dry off, running back to my room with a towel blocking my front- not caring if CeCe catches sight of my butt.
Sure enough, "Tom! Gross! I don't need to see your little twink ass!"
I ignore her again, she'll walk in eventually when she curious. My chocolate brown mop of hair is still dripping as I yank my underwear and black jeans on, and I use the towel in an attempt to make it damper. I had decided that a light blue cropped hoodie with a tight black tank top under it would be perfect to make Lewis's attention stay on me. I hope, at least, not having much confidence in that thought.
Normally, I'd go with a baggy hoodie and comfortable pants that aren't jeans, but I want to impress Lewis and make him want me. As CeCe says, 'Show off your assets', I'm going to try to do just that. Usually, I'd keep to my hoodies when with strangers because certain people are jerks, but I'm willing to let this be an expectation. Lewis is delightful and caring, I doubt he'd be a swine and make an inappropriate comment about me.
I wonder what we're gonna do, take a walk, sit on a bench or at a picnic table and just talk. That sounds wonderful, just the two of us in a beautiful park. I'm hoping he doesn't expect too much of me or flat out rejects me at the end of the day, I'm still unsure whether or not this is a date and it makes me nervous. What if he tries to kiss me? Or I mess up? Say something wrong? Oh god, what if I trip?
Taking calming deep breaths as I slip on my black converse shoes, my body tingles with anxiety. I'll be fine, Lewis is kind, I'll be fine. Chanting this to myself, I get up and turn out of my bedroom into the hallway after grabbing my phone. I have about fifteen minutes left, but he said he would wait and I'm hoping he doesn't mind being alone for another few minutes. I'm not risking running and smelling of sweat when I finally see him again, that is not a good impression.
Is Lewis this nervous? I scoff, of course, Lewis isn't anxious. He's confident and laid back, I doubt meeting me will make him anxious. I'm tiny and awkward, he's enormous and friendly - like a big dog. He doesn't let himself get apprehensive over a meeting of people, even if I'm someone he comes across as interested in romantically. If anything, others would probably be uneasy going up to him.
If he didn't smile so much I'm positive he'd be scary and people wouldn't be very willing to walk up to him, both him and Seán. While his Irish friend was polite and kind to me, I can also tell that if he simply wanted to, Seán would be able to intimidate people. Both men are huge, in size and height, they look like bears, they probably could rip someone to shreds if need be.
Lewis isn't like that, although I've only spoken to him through the phone and seen him in person once, I could be wrong. He may have a dark side, although I just can't see the playful childish man I met being a murderer or being a criminal. I'm expecting him to have some baggage, crazy ex, or simply into hardcore fetishes.
"And where the hell are you going?"
I'm snapped from my thoughts as CeCe blocks my way to the door, I can merely stare at her for a second, having completely forgotten she was here. My friend is gripping an iced coffee in her hand, a thin black eyebrow arched as black eyes stare at me. She's in sweat pants and a black sweater, she didn't plan to go anywhere then. Her hair is tucked into a big beanie hat and she's mostly makeup-less, as she on eyeliner that is purposely smudged.
"Oh, yeah, sorry. I'm meeting with Lewis, in like, now." Thinking she remembers Lewis and how she forced my number in his hand, I go to walk around her.
She presses a hand to my shoulder, expression confused yet thoughtful as she struggles to remember. "Who..?"
Rolling my eyes, I repeat the name she gave Lewis. "Sexy beefcake Daddy."
Instantly, her expression lights up, and a big grin is sliding on her lips. "Oh, yeah! That's great, Tom Boy! Finally getting you a real man, I'm proud."
Laughing and blushing at the same time, I move around her again. "Yeah, yeah, whatever. I gotta go meet him, you're free to stay!"
I'm almost out the door when I finish my sentence and look back at her, seeing a smug smile while she watches me leave. "Make sure he bites you, Alphas love to claim little twinks. Wear protection too, don't where he's been."
Incredulously, my eyes go wide as I stare at her. "CeCe! Stop!"
I close the door before she can say anything else, yet I hear her laughing at me through the door. She says these things just to rile me up, knowing full well that I'll blush and, sometimes, stutter out a response. I'm not against the dirty words or what she implies with them, it's just that, I've only had sex once and I don't know very many people. I haven't necessarily been exposed to many situations that involved sex or been around people who talk like CeCe.
My past relationship, and the thing with William, wasn't sexual. It was mostly non-sexual BDSM and power dynamics, we didn't do anything remotely sex-related- even if some people assume everything about BDSM is sexual. They never spoke as CeCe did, and no one I've ever met so far has. Knowing CeCe for three years now, I should be used to it. Unfortunately, I'm not.
If Lewis and CeCe ever meet, I just hope she won't embarrass me too badly. Though, Lewis may get a kick out of her nickname for him.
Two minutes late isn't bad, normal even for the average person. I'm proud of myself for not making Lewis wait very long for me. I'm chewing on my lip and fiddling with my hoodie sleeves as my eyes scan the park area, looking for a certain Scottish giant. It doesn't take long to locate him, and I'm completely glad CeCe isn't with me - she'd point out I'm drooling.
Lewis is leaning on the wall at the entrance to the park, a stone wall that displays the name. Clad in only jeans that have multiple rips and holes in them, a black wife-beater shirt that has the front tucked into his jeans behind a belt. It's warmer today so Lewis doesn't have any covers over his arms, his massive, muscled tattooed arms that are on full display. Board shoulders are also in this delicious presentation, as well as a tasty man bun.
He's holding his phone, the sight throws me off a bit because his phone looks so tiny in his gigantic hand. It's oddly satisfying to see, the small device enclosed in his gentle grip. Has he ever accidentally broken a phone before? That would be hot. What is wrong with me, my god.
Lewis hasn't noticed me as I shyly walk up to him, the man is texting on the phone and huffs with an eye roll. Although, the annoyed expression disappears instantly when he spots me stopping in front of him. A large happy grin sliding on his lips and his eyes light up, he practically bounces off the wall to get closer to me - seeing a man his size do that is quite a sight.
"Tommy Boy! I'm glad ya made it!" He doesn't move to touch me, putting his hands in his pockets and smiling widely. His beard is neater than the last time I saw him, maybe he cleaned up a bit?
I smile, finding everything about how excited he is adorable. "Hi, Lewis. Uh, thank you for last night, that was really nice of you."
I'm blushing again, the reminder of what he did for me causes a flutter in my stomach. Lewis chuckles, "Ah, it's no bother to me. I liked it, helped you, didn't it?"
I nod, it did help me sleep. It's the best I've slept in a while, I didn't even get up or toss and turn. It would be nice to always sleep like that, to have Lewis willing to do that because his voice is soothing.
The Scottish man's smile widens, "then that's what matters to me, it helped you get to sleep. That's important."
The flush on my cheeks increases and in embarrassment, I look away from Lewis to my feet. I love that he enjoyed last night, I was worried he'd tell me that it wouldn't happen again. It's sweet of him to care about me getting sleep, I like what he said about it and that it's important to him. It's nice to have someone care again, especially someone that seems genuine such as Lewis.
"Ah, none of that now. Look on up at me, I wanna see your eyes, bòidheach." He lightly nudges my shoulder with his elbow to drive the half request half demand to point.
The faint touch is warm, even if it barely lasts a second. I imagine he's a human furnace and I find myself liking the thought, I'm much more of a winter person and appreciate the coldness. But I can also imagine myself cuddling up to Lewis to get his warmth he could put off - if only he'd touch me for longer than a small nudge.
Obeying the gentle demand to face him, I peek up at him, finding his smile impossibly wider. His eyes are glowing in the sun, vibrant green like a forest in the summer. He's incredibly handsome, especially with how the shadows from the sun outline his features and make his beard or hair shimmer.
Shaking myself, I focus and pick out a topic to change the subject from me to him. "What does that mean? The, uh, the word you called me."
Lewis backups slowly, patiently waiting for me to realize he wants me to follow him before turning and walking at a pace I can keep up with along the sidewalk that goes around the whole park. "It means beautiful in Scottish Gaelic, the language I grew up speakin."
He smirks when I flush pink again, "oh..thank you then."
Lewis chuckles, "Don't thank me for sayin a fact, Tommy Boy. I expect any compliment from me ta be taken and believed."
The look I receive when he emphasizes 'believed', makes me realize he understands I don't necessarily have such a good self-image and I don't believe I'm beautiful - no matter how much I may love hearing it. Lewis picks up a lot quicker than I thought, and he may have been able to tell through my reactions on the phone when he gave me compliments, that I didn't reply as fast or I changed the subject. Then just a moment ago, blushing and looking away and going onto something else.
Instead of talking about my issue with receiving compliments, I search for something to take away from me. "Is that spoken in Scotland? I didn't know you spoke anything other than English with an accent."
Lewis laughs, deep and husky. "Nah any more. That there is the old language, they mostly speak English now. 'Cept the elder folk and some families, like mine."
"Why? If it's old why not use it?" I ask, curious. If Gaelic is the language they used to speak, why stop?
He shrugs, "It's dying. I don't keep up with much but I know some argue over why. I just think it's because people moved to Scotland from America and English spread like herpes. Ireland is much the same, the old language dying."
My eyebrows furrow, "That doesn't seem alright. It sounds really pleasant."
His arm brushes mine again, "Aye, it does. I'm glad I speak it, that way I can impress you."
I go wide-eyed at him, watching him smirk down at me while I process that. "Impress me?! Is that what you want?!"
"tha, a bheil e ag obair?"
My knees go weak and I have to fight to stay upright, to keep walking when all I want to do is lay down and let him have me. Here I thought that his voice was impressive normally, low and husky with a roughness that adds to his thick accent. Lewis speaking the language he grew up speaking, one I never heard before and one that is a very beautiful language, is something completely different. His voice is relatively the same but the way he pronounces and forms the words changes his voice slightly.
It's the most attractive thing I've found in a man since I discovered my voice kink, Lewis is a walking fantasy of mine with the bonus of a sexy accent. Men speaking in another language isn't what I normally considered a turn, it's a language and many people speak it. But hearing Lewis talk in his language is doing something to me, I'm assuming because it's his voice.
It takes a few minutes for me to come back online and focus on Lewis, the man had obviously seen my reaction and looks pleased with himself. Trying to control not getting a hard-on in the middle of a park, I stutter, "Wh- what did that mean?"
"'Yes, does it work?', asked if me talkin in Gaelic impresses you, got my answer." Lewis chuckles, eyes glancing behind us before his hand appears on my shoulder.
His arm is around my back and gently pulling me closer to his side, in surprise I make soft noise but I quickly realize that he grabbed me because a group of people is walking behind us. They're going at a faster pace, too wrapped up in their conversations to notice us, and would've run me over. Lewis pulled me just as they pass us, not even glancing in our direction.
Lewis's body is a furnace, I guessed that correctly. His side is warm and I feel the chill I had vanishing from where we're connected, my whole side, my shoulder, and my back are warmer than I've ever been outside recently. It feels amazing, so good that when he moves to pull away and give me my space, an involuntary whine leaves my throat.
Lewis doesn't remove himself from me, he pulls me closer and tighter to him. Laughing when I blush and pull his arm over my shoulders, he doesn't comment on it and continues talking.
We talk about everything and anything, laugh at things we see, or joke about what we think a person is doing. It's relaxing, and the most fun I've had. Lewis doesn't feel like a stranger I met a few days ago, it feels like I'm hanging out with a good friend. He's the funniest person I've ever meet and has the greatest personality.
We haven't breached the topic of past relationships or kinks, anything of the sort. Getting to know each other on the basic levels first before going to slightly more serious topics, though Lewis doesn't seem like someone who will let a topic be serious for long. He'd probably find a way to make me laugh.
Lewis has been leading us around the park, arm over my shoulder and occasionally rubbing his big hand on my upper arm. Guiding me through and deciding where to go next or if we sit down. He's taken us out of the park and out onto the public sidewalk, we've been walking while we speak and I'm surprised when Lewis stops and opens a door for me. I get punched in the face with the aroma of coffee and donuts.
I focus on the building and recognize that we're at a Dunkin Donuts, I don't get to comment on it as Lewis gently pushes me in before him. Once inside, his hand appears on my back, large and warm and comforting, to guide me to a corner booth next to the window. He sits down across from me, the smile that hasn't fallen yet, still on his lips.
"Figured we'd get something ta eat, have ya ate?" He leans on the table, arms crossed, and relaxed.
I shake my head, then at his raised eyebrow that I imply as his disappointment, rush to explain. "I didn't wanna be late and make you wait for me, and I had to get ready then CeCe walked in and interrogated me about where I was going and I forgot-"
"Leannan, calm down. Take a breath. I'll make sure ya eat before we meet up again. If you want to."
Taking a deep breath to calm my heart and sudden nerves, I nod. "I really wanna meet again. Just, uh, is a date?"
I had to ask, it's the only thing that had been bothering me. Is this a date? Did he mean it that way, or just as friends? Does he want me as a date? I haven't been able to get it out of mind. I'm making myself anxious thinking about it.
Lewis gives me a soft smile, "Do ya want it to be, Tommy Boy?"
He's not judging me and from the distinct expression he has, he's been aware I was bothered by something for a while. He just knew, eventually, I'd ask. It's a comfort, both that he's able to read me this quickly and that he won't push me into a subject when I'm not ready.
I do want this to be a date, Lewis is great and I'm crushing harder than I thought I would over him. We get along amazingly well, and he's been a big soft dominant all-day- it seems even if he isn't a BDSM dom, he still is subconsciously a domineering man. I do like him and I want to see where we can go together, as a couple.
Yet, I'm shy and anxious. My only answer is verbal, it's a nod of my head while my eyes avoid Lewis to glance around the building. It's not busy today and there are only two workers I see, both ladies.
"Look at me, boy." Lewis's voice takes on a sterner tone than I've grown accustomed to with him, and it makes me turn to him while a small shiver runs down my spine. That was sexy.
Lewis doesn't look mad, as his tone could've suggested, he smiles just as softly when I meet his eyes. "Then this is a date. But, we need to talk bout some things."
My face heats up and I smile, relief feeling me. I'm on a date and it's the best I've ever had, I'm happy and feel lucky for the first time in a while. We do need to talk though, understand each other more, and know what each expects. "Okay."
Lewis chuckles at the eagerness in my voice as he stands up, forcing me to look up at him from my seat. My body heats up at the sight of him towering over me, looking very much like a wet dream. Shaking myself from those thoughts as quickly as possible, I force myself to listen to what he's saying.
"Want coffee?" When he sees me bite my lip in hesitation, not wanting for him to think he has to buy me something. His tone changes again, back to the stern one that reminds of a dominant, "Don't lie to me, Tommy Boy. I want to buy you stuff."
Fidgeting with my fingers, I answer. "Carmel Macchiato, please."
I'm stunned when Lewis smirks and uses a hand to softly ruffle my hair as if giving me a silent 'good boy'. I can't and don't want to comment on it, afraid he'd assume I don't enjoy him doing things such as that. I do want that, and much more from him. I relish him doing that, love the feel of his big hands on me, and being able to be close to him.
I don't want him to think he has to stop touching me, especially when he only did so when I showed I enjoyed his touch. He seemed hesitant to lay a hand on me and I can safely say he simply did so to save me from being dumped into by people, even then he was going to move away. Now he knows I don't mind his touch, prefer to be touching him, and I don't want that to end.
Instead of mentioning it, I give a smile and watch him then around and walk to the counter to order. Lewis has been relaxed since we met up a few hours ago, he's a laid back man and I noticed he doesn't let himself get tense. He hasn't straightened up to his full height, which I learned is six foot nine and he's an inch shorter than Seán; whose seven feet. It isn't much of a surprise that when he stops at the counter his hands slide into his pockets and his body is as relaxed as it has been.
One of the girls at the counter, a pretty lady on the chubby side with long dark hair and tanned skin, smiles at him and I catch her eyes scan down Lewis's body appreciatively. He notices and his eyebrow raises but he doesn't comment on it, smiling kindly and ordering. I assume he's used to getting girls attention and isn't bothered unless they actively do something, there's nothing wrong with looking after all.
It is a comfort that Lewis doesn't give her his undivided attention as he did to me, he politely holds the conversation she starts but he doesn't flirt or appear interested. When the girl sets two coffees on the counter as Lewis pays, she says something that has Lewis shake his head and gesture over to me as he speaks. The lady politely nods and smiles, handing Lewis a small pink box.
As soon as he's sitting, he slides my coffee to me with a napkin and sets the box in the middle of us, opening it. There are six donuts, some filled with cream, others have chocolate with sprinkles, and two plain ones.
"Since you haven't eaten yet, can you eat three? If you want more, you can have mine. At least three, Tommy Boy." He takes three for himself, placing them on a napkin then slides the box in front of me.
"Oh, yeah, I should be able to. Thank you." Taking a sip from my coffee, I consider asking what the lady said and why he pointed to me. He won't get upset about me asking for details on his conversation, will he?
"Ya look nervous. What's on your mind?" Lewis asks, watching me blink in surprise that he noticed a change in my expression or body language. "If you got a question, go on and ask. I won't get mad."
Nodding, my turn my eyes to the ice in my drink as I ask. "Why did you point to me?" Then I suddenly realize that sounds like I'm upset, and try to backtrack, "that I'm bothered by that! I'm just curious!"
My eyes at wide as I stare at Lewis, hoping he believes me. He just smiles at me, calm as could be. "She asked if I had a girlfriend, I said I'm gay and on a date with a gorgeous boy."
In embarrassment, my cheeks, and ears heat up. "Oh.."
Lewis chuckles, taking a drink from his coffee. "You can ask me anything, even bout a conversation. I won't hide anythin from you. Trust is important."
I nod, agreeing to that. I'm happy he doesn't seem upset and willing to be open to me, he's been an open book about his friends and his life in Ireland or America. I believe him when he says he won't hide anything. I need to make sure I provide the same openness when we start asking the real questions, especially about my kinks.
"Now, serious conversation. I'm goin to tell you things bout myself, if ya not comfortable with it, that's fine. It's not a deal-breaker." He says this after I finished my first donut, voice serious, and capturing my full attention.
My nerves start up again, knowing I'll have to tell him about my interest in a relationship. I'm not sure I'm ready to go through any judgment if he's not apart of the BDSM community, especially not for my kinks. But I nod and agree to listen because it's fair to understand where he wants this to go, just like he needs to know where I want it to go.
Bluntly and calmly, he states, "I'm a full-time Dominant, in the BDSM lifestyle. Do you know what that is?"
My eyes are wide, lips parted, and shocked into a frozen state. My donut has fallen back onto the table and I don't even process it, starting at Lewis. Because he's dominant and he into BDSM and he's interested in me, and I finally found a dominant. One that is exactly what I want, who is nice and caring, and knows how to get my attention. Lewis is my dream dominant, as far as I've seen at least. I never imagined he'd actually be a dominant.
"Tommy Boy? Yea there?" There's a snap in front of my face and I blink in reflex, focusing on Lewis. He seems concerned, green eyes watching me cautiously.
"I'm a sub. And I'm shocked, I didn't think you'd be a dominant, that'd be too good to be true and I'm really unlucky normally. Holy shit." My brain to mouth filter is damaged, and I blurt the first thing to come to mind. Then promptly cover my mouth, startled at myself for saying that.
Lewis laughs, smiling happily. "I had my suspicions, just needed a confirmation. Do you want me as your dominant? If dating goes alright."
Immediately, I nod. "Yeah. If, you know, it works out and we get together. I'm horrible at being a human, I need someone, and you already got me crushing on you. That's so not fair."
I'm relaxing, I realize, now that I know for sure he's in the community and won't judge me. Allowing myself to talk a bit more and hopefully, let him into my life. The small barrier I put up is going down, I'm able to relate to Lewis more now that I know he's a dominant and let myself get more comfortable with him.
"I'd say it is, cause I'd like you as a sub and I'm 'crushing' for you." He smiles and uses air quotes. "Let's make a deal, if dating goes smoothly we start doing our lifestyle; as dominant and submissive and in an exclusive relationship. If not, we stay friends."
I understand exactly what Lewis is proposing, and I like the idea. We date but do any BDSM scenes or use titles, such as 'Master' or anything Lewis calls his Subs. We see how we work together first, if we'd be able to be in a long time relationship.
"But, can you still dominate me? Non-sexual? I need guidance in my daily life, I'm a mess. Always late to work, not sleeping, not eating, sometimes I forget to shower." Incredulously at myself, "Shower! The easiest thing to remember!"
Lewis seems amused with my small outburst, but nods. "Aye, we'll do that. Nothing sexual, no titles, no scenes. Only dating and guidance, until we deem we're ready."
I smile, happy I'll finally have some to care for me and someone to care for.