Searching For Serenity

"How long has it been since you last saw these beautiful corridors? Smelled these sweaty armpits? Or were thrown into these lockers by these strong monsters we call students?" Henry asked trying to be emotional.

I couldn't help but roll my eyes at his dramatic tone as I reached out for my locker. I put my code into it while it clicked open. I faced him with a smile on my face,

"Two months. And believe me, I didn't miss them at all."

Henry heaved a sigh before his expression was all serious, "Of course, you didn't. No one would. I am jealous of you."

A mocking laugh escaped my mouth. Jealous? Not sure if that was the right way to put it. He wouldn't still be jealous if he knew the reason for my absence from school for two months. It wasn't something I did for fun. Definitely not something someone would want to experience just to skip school for two months. Skipping school was just an optional good thing I could add onto the bad ones.

Suddenly, there was a hand on my head ruffling my hair. I looked sideways to find Max grinning down at the both of us.

He ran his hand through my brunette hair before holding onto the ends, "Dye them pink, Serenity."

I slapped his hands away. He couldn't help but roll his eyes at me before turning all his attention towards Henry. He went towards him and ruffled his hair the same way as mine. But unlike me Henry couldn't help but blush at him.

I stood a little far away from them and couldn't help but smile at them. At their cuteness. Just sprinkling adorability wherever they went as a couple.

Max looked at me and squinted his eyes, "Why are you doing in that corner? Just come here and give me a hug. After all you were gone for two months." His voice turned sad in the end.

I couldn't help but feel emotional as I went and hugged the both of them. Max tightened his arms around the both of us- literally engulfing us into him.

"God, what would I even do without you both in my life." He stated while putting his chin on top of our heads.

"If you keep holding onto us like this we will suffocate and die. And then Max, you will have all the time in the world to figure out what you would do without us." Henry mumbled into Maxs' chest.

Henry was shorter than Max but their height difference only made them look more compatible. Besides, no matter how tall and masculine Max looked Henry was always the serious, mature one out of them both.

I could feel the vibrations in Max's chest as he laughed and let us go.

"Let's go, my loves." He said putting his arms around us now.

••••

I opened the door to the classroom. I managed to be late even after being on time in school. Let me take a guess...the snuggly bear hugs from Max? Yeah definitely the reason.

"And you are?" I heard the teacher say.

I looked in the front and cleared my throat, "S-"

But before I could even utter a word he cut me off again by throwing another question at me, "Are you supposed to be in this class?"

"Y-"

"This is chemistry class and if you mistook it for another class, please leave. I have already experienced a similar situation which wasted my time."

I don't know which experience he was talking about but surely I wasn't in the wrong class.

I closed the door behind me and took a few steps inside, "Uh- I am Serenity Halls. And I do have your class right now."

He stared at me for a while with the book in his hands. He put it down before facing me completely now and folding his arms, "Are you new?" He asked.

Was I gone for too long that I seem like a complete stranger?

"No, Mr Weiss. I was on a leave for two months." I said adjusting the books in my hands.

There was a look of confusion on his face which turned into that of realisation, "I see. The student who took a leave because..."

"Mr Weiss," I said hastily, "Can I take a seat?"

I didn't want him to announce my personal issue in front of the whole class. I haven't even told my best friends yet for crying out loud. This was the last thing I wanted to happen today.

"Huh? Yeah, sure sure. Go ahead." He motioned me towards the empty seat in the middle while picking up his book again.

I thanked him before walking towards my seat. My eyes wandered all around at the people sitting. People busy doing all sorts of things. Chatting, sleeping, sitting ideally.

"Welcome back" I heard as I reached my seat.

I looked up and saw this beautiful girl sitting beside my seat. She had the green eyes one wishes for and she just looked...perfect.

I smiled at her nodding my head. Putting all my stuff on the table I took a seat. I couldn't help but look beside me once again— at the girl. I wonder if she was new. I had never seen her in school before. She had to be new.

She suddenly turned her head to look at me. I snapped my eyes back in the front and looked around.

I could hear her chuckling,

"Is there something you want to say?" She asked.

I cleared my throat and looked at her, "Not really. It's just...when did you join?"

The smile from her face vanished as she blinked at me with her green eyes. Once. Twice. Thrice,

"I am Olivia." She extended her hand in front of her, "Nice to meet you, Serenity Halls."

I took her hand in mine and gave it a shake while subtly nodding, "Same here, Olivia."

The smile on her face reappeared as she took her hands back, "I have been in this school for quite some time now. Maybe more than a year or so." She answered to my previous question.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't know. I can be an oblivious person." I said feeling a little guilty.

She laughed while dismissing her hands, "It's alright. It isn't just you."

I didn't reply anything to that because it was too awkward for me. I mean...she is very beautiful I don't see how someone could have missed her.

"So," she continued, "you must be behind in class."

I nodded my head while opening the book to the page we were studying, "I tried self study but it didn't really work great for me." I chuckled.

"It doesn't work for me either." She chuckled with me before snapping her fingers lightly, "what about I help you catch up?"

I looked at her gratefully. When will I ever find someone initiating to help me catch up.

"That would be great!" I said ecstatically.

Olivia tried suppressing her smile but there was a spark in her eyes, "Let's do it soon then!"

"Soon sounds good."

•••

"Don't worry, We will help you out in some of the subjects, right Max?" Henry said.

The three of us put our trays on the table as we sat down. Max and Henry sat side by side. When Max did not reply to Henry's last statement, he elbowed him in his stomach.

"Ouuuch. What?" Max looked at Henry grumpily.

"Reply." He said with a dead panned expression.

Max rolled his eyes at him before looking at me smiling softly, "Of course we will. That's a given."

I chuckled at him and looked around the cafeteria.The more important thing right now seemed the fact that there were students sitting alone at their tables.

There was this stupid rule in our school made by the XAN trio (Xavier, Alec and Nathaniel) that allowed no one to sit alone in the cafeteria. Either you sit with a friend or you don't enter the cafeteria at all.

If by any chance anyone was found to be sitting alone...it didn't end well for them.

"What the hell happened in two months?" I asked with my mouth gape open, "Aliens?" I turned my head to look at Max in a questioning way.

Never in my entire time spent in this school had I seen tables with people sitting in them alone. As weird as it may sound, it was more weird to watch the sight in front of me in such a short span of time than anything else.

Max grinned at me followed by Henry. They both looked at each other before looking at me with their matching grins,

"The XAN trio. Look at their table." Max pointed out.

And obviously my eyes automatically went to the XAN trio's table. The same trio who made this stupid rule. The same trio, people here love so much.

I...just don't care.

The first person I looked at that table was none other than Xavier. The most handsome among the three of them, they say. He was sitting there laughing while holding hands with a girl.

A girl. And happy? What in the name of Jesus happened?

I had never seen Xavier with a girl. I had never seen him smiling, yet alone laughing.

"Yeah." I heard Henry's voice, "the changed man. You have no idea what happened in these past two months while you were gone."

"What happened?" I said in a low voice because the next person my eyes landed on were, Alec. The most caring person of the group. The 'nice' guy. And looking at him right now, even from this far away I could see the bags under his sky blue eyes.

"You see that girl with Xavier?"

I could. I did. It was difficult to not notice her. With her smile it seemed like she was lighting up the whole cafeteria. And I could just tell there were people who admired her.

"She is Xavier's fiancee." Max said with his mouth full, "Well we don't know for sure but there have been many kind of rumours flying around for the both of them."

"What kind of rumours?" I asked.

"I don't know? How they have been engaged since childhood? How they had some deal. They even dated other people, which I can confirm, before getting together. The rumours go as far as Alec being in love with Liya."

I kept quiet. Liya. So that was her name. Having Xavier to fall in love must have been difficult. I can't even stand to look the guy in the eyes without getting intimidated.

"The rumour about Alec being in love with Liya were most probably true." Henry said while putting one of his hands behind Max's chair.

"How can you be so sure?" Max asked Henry which a quizzical expression.

Henry just shrugged his shoulders before reaching out for one of the fries on his plate while his other hand was still behind Max's chair, "I saw it Max. I was there in that corridor at that time when," he moved his hands in an animated way while still holding onto the fry, "Xavier pulled Liya out of Alec's hands and yelled, 'keep your hands away from my fiancé.'...why would he say that if Alec didn't have feelings for Liya?"

"Maybe. Or maybe he just misinterpreted."

I looked at the two of them as they talked about this great incidence which took place in these last two months.

The both of them continued presenting their theories to each other while I ignored their bickering.

My eyes moved back to the table with the XAN trio. Xavier, Alec and Nathaniel. So much happened in these past two months. People changed. Found love. Were heartbroken. But what about me? I am still there where I was two months ago. For anything I feel like an outsider here.

And all because of just one incidence.

Henry snapped his fingers in front of my face making me look at him. I put a smile on my face while looking at him in a questioning way.

"Serene, what's wrong?" He asked me with concern.

I shook my head at him convincingly, "It's nothing."

His brows were furrowed into deep thinking while his eyes ran all over my face as if he could figure me out if he tried hard enough.

Max put his hands on the table and clasped them together while leaning a little towards me so that he could have a good look of my face too. I tugged a strand of my straight hair behind my ear as I felt uneasy with the both of them staring at me.

"Stop staring at me!" I finally snapped at them.

"You know you don't have to be worried, right? We will update you with everything that you missed in these two months. You are not alone. But I want to know, serene, did you really just go to a trip or are you hiding something from the both of us?"

I stared at Max. My eyes moving from his ginger hair to his dark eyes. I couldn't help but gulp while looking down at my hands which were sitting on my laps now.

Slowly, I nodded my head at them. I gave them the brightest smile I could summon up right now.

"I hate this." Henry muttered looking at me hurt, "Serenity Halls, we will understand if you don't want to tell us right now. But at least don't lie to us. And don't give us that fake smile and think we will believe that."

I- I don't know what to say to that. I just didn't want the both of them to feel down because of me. I love both of them so much to ruin their time together with my problems.

Henry got up all of a sudden and came towards me. I watched his steps carefully as he knelt down in front of me.

"Serene," he whispered in such a low voice that only I could hear him.

"Yeah?"

"We both love you just as our sister." His eyes softened.

I closed my eyes while nodding my head at them, "I know."

"When you are ready you'll tell us, okay?" He asked for reassurance.

I opened my eyes and looked at him with warmth. I would. Once I am sure what actually happened in my life they'd be the first to know.

Henry got up with a smile on his face. He kissed my forehead lightly before going and joining his seat.

•••

I put my earphones on before trying to zone out everyone else around me. I stared at the hardcover in my hands for a while before opening it and running my finger across the words. I sigh before closing my eyes and trying to focus on the chorus that came on.

I was still holding onto the novel that was in my hands while I leaned my head back to rest it on the top of chair.

I opened my eyes momentarily. I have to read a novel and prepare a thesis on it to make it up for two months I was on leave.

I don't like reading. I have read a few novels but it's not really one of my favourite hobby. So being here in this library was really not what I wanted right now. I would much rather travel and try to find new places.

I sat up straight before looking around at my surrounding. Everyone was too busy buried into their books. I looked at the novel in my hands again and read the title, 'Romeo and Juliet.'

I pursed my lips tight. Not sure how I felt about reading this novel. It's not like I had any other choice because according to the teacher he wanted me to hand in a thesis on this very novel. Not any of my choice because that would have been so much better.

At least I wouldn't be stuck here to read this tragic novel.

I was just about to start reading when my attention was grabbed by a guy hurrying into the school library and going to the section of thrillers.

I could hear the song still playing in my ears while my eyes were fixed on the tall figure just grabbing any book that came into his hands without even reading the title.

He snapped his head back up and stretched his neck in search of something. He looked around for a while before his blue eyes met mine. But he looked away not even a second later. His eyes sliding to the empty seats in front of me then looking back at me with his tired eyes before passing me a smile and nodding towards the empty seats.

I shrugged my shoulders letting him know that I didn't mind him sitting here. It was a library of course he can sit wherever he wants, he didn't have to ask me.

He walked towards me and setting his book on the table sat in front of me. I watched him as he drummed his fingers on the table while looking towards the entry again and again as if waiting for someone.

He looked at me again before smiling at me apologetically.

I was confused. Why was he in such a hurry that he picked up any book he could laid his hands on and was sitting just waiting for someone?

It's like all my questions were answered the second I saw her walking in through the library door. She was already carrying a book in her hands and was probably here to just read in peace unlike me who would do anything to get out of this place.

Alec who was sitting in front of me suddenly held up the book in his hand while putting his other hand in the air and waving it for Liya to notice. And just as expected Liya noticed him. A smile came onto her lips as she waved back at Alec with enthusiasm and started making her way towards our table.

It was because of her that Alec was in such a hurry. He wanted to be here so that he could meet up with her. That only proves that the rumours about him being in love with Liya were true.

I tried to look back into my book but I noticed Alec holding his book upside down. I watched him as his eyes were still waiting for Liya.

I rolled my eyes before pulling my earphones out, "Alec?" I whispered just loud enough for him to listen.

He looked at me confused upon hearing me call his name.

Yeah sure maybe I was the weird one.

I pointed towards his book which was upside down. He looked down before muttering something under his breath and holding the book correctly now.

"Thank you." He whispered gratefully.

I waved my hand at him letting him know it was nothing.

Liya came and put her books down before pulling her chair and sitting next to Alec.

"What are you doing here?" She asked in her sweet voice. It was the first time I heard her speak. The first time I saw her from up close. The girl I have been hearing all these rumours about for the whole day.

Alec opened his mouth to say something but I tuned him out by putting my earphones back on. I had no intentions of listening in on their conversation.

I buried my head into the book just like everyone else around me. As I still stared at the first page of this tragic novel I couldn't help but wonder,

Didn't it hurt to look at the person you love being with someone else?

I didn't even realise I was looking at Alec again before again wondering, how can he be still smiling like that in front of her even when he knows she will never love him back?

I changed the song before closing my eyes and zoning out the world again.

Who cares?

___