Holy fucking Jesus, he’s being serious.
“We said we weren’t doing this,” I say, allowing him to brush his lips against my jawline.
His touch is fire. Everything about him is fucking fire.
“Well we can’t, not here,” Jax sighs against me, his breath somehow still minty despite the food.
“What?” I laugh, trying to move away from him.
“Come to mine.”
There it is, the lust in his voice. I reach for the spoon, turning away from him as I scoop the melted ice cream into my mouth. I need to focus on something that’s not him. “Imogen is there.”
Jax looks irritated, pushing his hand through his hair. “I’m not suggesting we have a fuck session to rival all others, I’m asking you to spend more time with me.”
I’m trying to remain impassive, but I’m trembling beneath his turquoise gaze.
“At night?” I squeak out, as he holds his hands up.
“You can say no—”
“I don’t want to say no, I’m just a little wary of what Imogen might think.”
Jax smiles then, nodding as he gazes at me with a thoughtful expression on his face.
“I’ll get her to bed, then come.”
My heart is beating erratically in my chest, but the way he is looking at me right now renders me useless.
“I don’t know your address.”
He smiles widely , lifting his phone up.
“I just sent it to you.”
“Okay,” I swallow, and he nods, resting forward to wipe his thumb over my lip.
“You had some ice cream on your lip,” he smirks, loading some chocolate brownie onto his bowl. “But it’s gone now.”
He sucks his thumb, groaning.
“Vanilla, I need some of that.”
I scoop some ice cream into his bowl, following him into the lounge where Imogen yawns, resting her head against Pepes.
“You look tired, baby,” Jax coos, and I swear my heart sings a fucking hymn.
I’m carrying his baby! The image of Jax holding our child springs to mind, all bare chested as he looks over at me with adoration—
That’s not how this is going to be.
“Thank you for a lovely evening, both of you. It’s been a pleasure,” Jax smiles, lifting a sleepy Imogen into his arms. She grins at me over his shoulder, then nestles her head into his neck, her fingers curling through his hair.
God. What a man.
“Anytime, Jax. Come again, Princess Imogen,” beams my aunt.
I follow him out, as my aunt grips my elbow.
“That is a man you spend more than one night with, Jolie,” she whispers in my ear, before walking back to Andrew in the lounge.
Imogen is yawning her little head off, and as Jax clips her in he closes the door, turning to me.
“See you in half an hour?”
His voice drizzles over my nerves like ice water, and I shudder. The effect he has on me is ridiculous.
“Sure. Drive safe.”
He smiles to himself, gazing at me before shaking his head and walking to the drivers side. He pulls away, giving me a little wave before he vanishes from sight.
“Holy fuck,” I mutter to myself, wondering what the hell I was doing.
“He is like a bloody model,” Lillian huffs from behind me, making me jump. “Your kids are going to be beautiful.”
“Kids?” I echo, shaking my head. “Not plural, Lillian. One child.”
I pat my stomach, walking back into the house where Andrew offers me a mint hot chocolate. I’d been having these for as long as I can remember, and they always soothe me no matter what.
“He’s a nice chap,” Andrew declares, walking towards the stairs. “Goodnight ladies, this old man needs some kip.”
I sink into the sofa, sipping my drink as Lillian watches me carefully. Her eyes are clouding over, and I know she’s got something to say.
“Can I ask you something?”
“If I say no, will you still ask?” I drawl, watching the cocoa swirl in my mug.
“Do you really not like him?”
I groan, throwing my head back as Lillian continues quickly.
“He isn’t a dickhead, Jolie. He’s a great dad to that little girl, and the way he looks at you—”
I lift my eyes to hers, shaking my head. “Don’t, Lillian,” I plead, gazing at her as though I can change her next words.
“Why don’t you just admit you like him?”
“Because,” I clear my throat, staring back at my mug of chocolate. “If we fuck up, then the baby won’t have the best of us. There will always be that animosity between the parents, and I really don’t want that.”
Lillian's face softens, and I see the lines on her forehead relax as she reaches over, rubbing my knee.
“But you won’t know if you don’t try. What if you are meant to be—”
“And you don’t get a second chance? What if he meets someone else? What if you do? Then what?”
I exhale, nodding. She’s right, of course she is.
“You aren’t your mother, Jolie.”
“I don’t know that,” I swallow, tears pricking my eyes. “Alcoholism isn’t a choice.”
“No, but you get help. You accept help when it’s offered. Your mother didn’t, and you suffered for that. Your baby won’t ever know what that feels like, because you’re a good person. So is Jax.”
“If he knew about my past...he wouldn’t want anything to do with me.”
“Let Jax decide, don’t jump to conclusions.”
“I’ve said I’ll go round tonight,” I blurt out, as Lillian grins.
“We just end up…” I wave a hand in the air, reddening as Lillian smirks.
“That’s how it is in the beginning.”
“God! It’s so complicated!”
Lillian nods, before standing up.
“That little girl will be fast asleep by now.”
I bite my lip, draining my drink before falling into her open embrace. The same arms that comforted me as a child.
“I love you and this little person inside of you, Jolie. I’m here for you regardless of what happens, but I want you to be happy.”
I nod, my eyes blurring with tears.
“I know, I do. I’ll go and see him.”
I pull away, wiping my eyes as I take a deep breath. Picking up my bag, I hunt for my car keys.
“Don’t let your past decide your future.”
I still at her words, as she kisses the top of my head softly.
“I love you too. Thank you for tonight,” I smile, heading towards the door.
It's time to go and see Jax.