Warning: Contains scenes of attempted rape
“Daddy please! I want to go.” Phoenix shouted lying on the floor and kicking his legs around like he was fighting a ghost.
“No Phoenix, we’re not going to the movies, I have work to do.” I sighed opening my laptop.
Storm was sitting on the counter smiling. She had been going through a weird smiling phase, I didn’t mean that smiling was weird, just Storm’s new smile was weird. Instead of smiling normally, Storm tilted her head down and made her eyes as big as possible and grinned widely, like a psycho. It had been freaking everyone out, including Phoenix, she had clearly picked it up from Wild.
Chase came downstairs and as he saw Storm grinning like a serial killer, he visibly flinched before looking at me.
“It’s a phase.” I explained.
“Please!” Phoenix shouted, with so much viciousness that I didn’t think he knew the meaning of please.
“No.” I said finally.
He stopped kicking and sat cross legged on the floor, I knew what was coming and did not have the time to deal with it right now. Phoenix took a deep breath before putting both hands over his ears and screaming as loud as possible- another thing my siblings had picked up from Wild.
“What’s Phoenix upset about?” Chase shouted over the noise.
“He wants to go the cinema, I said no because I have an insane amount of work to do.”
“I can take him.” He said.
Immediately Phoenix stopped and looked up at Chase who had no idea what he had just gotten himself into. Going to see a film with Phoenix was pretty hard, he always insisted on watching something completely inappropriate and it took half an hour to talk him out of it.
Then there was the popcorn, he could never choose if he wanted sweet or salty, the only thing he was sure of, was that he didn’t want sweet and salted. And to top it all off, during the movie, he had the inability to keep still, and it was incredibly distracting for everyone.
“Chase, no, it’s fine.” I said
“I can take him Blaze, I don’t really have anything more pressing to do.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah, it’s no problem.”
“Okay, take my car then.” I said, I was pretty sure Chase had a license.
As Phoenix ran upstairs to get changed, Storm looked at me still smiling like she planned to take over the world.
“You are a weird child.” I said seriously.
She giggled and reached her hands out for me to pick her up. As I was holding her, Chase came running down and Phoenix followed shortly after.
“Never in your life have you gotten ready that quick.” I said to my brother.
“I was excited, okay?” Phoenix said.
He had his t-shirt on inside out and trousers back to front, I don’t know how he had managed to zip it up.
“I can take your serial killer child as well.” Chase said.
As if she understood, Storm held her arms out to Chase, that was strange. She never normally liked strangers holding her, not that Chase was a stranger, but he hadn’t known her too long.
Once they had all left, there was this awkward feeling inside me. It was quiet, this house hadn’t been quiet, not for as long as I could remember, but I didn’t have to worry about it for long because the doorbell rang.
I opened it only to see Taylor standing there with roses in one hand and my second favourite chocolates in the other.
“What do you want?” I snapped, “Me to wish you a happy 25th birthday?”
“Look, I came to say sorry, I didn’t want to tell you because I was afraid you wouldn’t want to be with me anymore. I love you Blaze; I don’t want to throw away what we have.”
I didn’t say anything. Taylor had been there, through the midnight phone calls and me ignoring him for days on end because I was busy with school work or Phoenix and Storm. We all lied at the start of a relationship, I said I liked the colour yellow because I wanted to sound interesting, when in reality I hated it.
I hated everything about our relationship.
“Can I at least come inside?”
Phoenix and Storm were out, so I guess it was alright if he came in.
“How come Chase is staying here?” Taylor asked as he took his shoes off.
“Why do you care?” I said closing the door.
Taylor shrugged and put the flowers and chocolate on the living room table as he walked further in.
“Are your siblings here?”
“No, Chase took them to the movies.”
“Whole place to ourselves?”
“I guess so.”
And then Taylor was kissing me, and I pushed him away gently.
“Taylor no, we’re done.” I said with the most certainty I’d had in a long time.
“I said, we’re done, I hate myself when I’m around you, and Phoenix doesn’t like it either.”
Taylor stepped away from me, he was shocked, how could he possibly be shocked? I wasn’t going to stay with him, this wasn’t something I had realised now either, I think I had figured out that this wasn’t right a long time ago, I just never said it aloud.
“Phoenix? And what? He likes Chase then?”
“Chase? This has nothing to do with him.” I said.
Taylor scoffed, he took another step backwards before walking angrily towards me, I felt my fists curl up by my sides.
“You’ve got a thing for him? I pity him in that case.” Taylor said, he was kind of snarling as he spoke, “You’ll just lead him on like the fucking tease you are.”
I’d been called worse in my life than a tease. When Mum was still here, she’d bring home all kinds of perverts and creeps so there was very little he could say to bother me, because in that moment I saw that he was just like them.
“Get out.” I said quietly.
He huffed furiously and started walking away, but as he neared the door, Taylor stopped and turned his head 90 degrees, so he wasn’t facing me properly, just out of the corner of his eye.
“You owe me.” He said.
“I owe you nothing.”
Then Taylor was pushing me into the wall, his lips were forced onto mine and one arm pressed my body to the wall, the other was at my thigh holding me against him. I had nowhere to move with his head keeping mine crushed to the wall.
I brought my knee up hard wedging it between us to gain some sort of leverage and as I felt his grip on me loosen slightly, I pushed him away hard.
“I didn’t wait all this time for nothing.” Taylor growled.
His hand slipped into his pocket and produced a small packet of pills, pills I recognised instantly because all the girls had been warned about them. They made you dizzy and disorientated, and completely messed up your vision.
I know that technically, I should have tried to be all heroic and try to hurt Taylor or something, but I didn’t. Instead, I ran like a stupid girl in a horror film running from a masked killer I ran upstairs. Seriously? Upstairs? What possessed me to go upstairs where there was no escape, nothing.
And I wasn’t like Chase, I wasn’t going to start jumping out of windows. So as I ran up and into my room, I slammed the door shut, pressing all my weight against it to keep it shut. Taylor was basically double my size, and as I recently found out my age, so he burst through it within seconds.
I really wished I had bought a lock now.
“What is wrong with you?” I shouted.
Taylor took a pill out of the packet.
“We can do this the easy way or the hard way.”
The second he moved away from the door, I saw my escape. Taylor may have been bigger and stronger than I was, but I was faster, way faster, I just needed a plan. And in a matter of seconds, I had one.
I ran from my room and to the front door, pulling frantically at the handle and searching for the keys before I realised Taylor must have hidden them. I heard him coming down the stairs and opened Phoenix’s toy box before climbing inside- I was desperate.
“Blaze…” Taylor said, his voice trailing off, “Where are you?”
He sounded like the creepiest seeker in hide and seek.
I waited until he was out of the room before climbing out and hiding behind the curtain, the window was closed but not locked, if I could just reach the latch at the top I could jump out. I put one foot on the window skill and pulled up, fingers reaching for the top.
Just as I pulled it and the window opened, hands gabbed me from behind and I kicked as though I was being kidnapped, which I kind of was. I felt his fingers in my mouth and pressed my lips shut, Taylor held my nose until my lungs started screaming for oxygen.
I opened my mouth for air and he shoved the pill in, then everything went black.
I don’t know how long I was unconscious for, it could have been hours or maybe just seconds, but either way it was scary, knowing there was a period of time in my life that I would never be able to account for.
“Oh good, you’re up, I had hoped you wouldn’t miss much.” Taylor whispered.
He had me pinned to the sofa shirtless but not naked which meant he hadn’t done anything yet. Even if he had, at least I wouldn’t remember it, but I knew I would remember this moment, I wasn’t likely to forget it.
“Taylor stop!” I shouted trying to move out from under him.
“Shush, shush, it’s alright. Just relax. Just smile for me Baby.” Taylor said.
I felt like I was about to start crying before I saw something shiny poking out from Taylor’s pocket, a phone, but not his phone, my phone. My phone, where Wild was on speed dial. I had only one shot at this, but it was my only choice.
“Why are you rushing?” I murmured kissing him.
Taken aback by the sudden change in mood, Taylor stopped holding me down. I sat up and kissed him hard, pushing his shoulders so he was lying on the sofa and I was on top of him. I ran my hands over his chest going further down to his jeans.
“What the fuck? You weren’t into it a second ago.” Taylor said visibly confused.
“Do you want me to stop?” I asked putting my hand down the front of his jeans.
He shook his head. I quickly reached for my phone, he was too distracted to feel me take it out. I unlocked it and texted Wild in a single movement, all I needed to write was ‘help’ and she’d bring the half the British army.
“You’re such a fucking tease Blaze.” Taylor laughed kissing me.
I pulled away and stood up from the sofa.
“Get out.” I said.
“What?” He barked.
I was still dizzy and couldn’t really see properly but kept upright nonetheless.
“In three minutes, Wild Jackson is going to be here, and I’m, going to tell her everything.” I snarled, “So get out.”
Taylor may have been an idiot and a jerk, but he knew that he wouldn’t stand a chance if I got Wild involved. The sound of a car pulling into the driveway, made him stand up, that was pretty quick if I’m being honest, even for Wild.
“This isn’t over Blaze.” He growled as he walked out.
Then it was quiet, and I looked around the room, at the curtain that had broken when Taylor had grabbed me and the cushions on the floor from the sofa. How fucked up everything was. The doorbell rang, it was probably Wild.
I opened it and saw Chase standing there with a grumpy looking Phoenix and sleeping Storm still in the car.
“Blaze, what’s wrong? Did he hurt you? Are you okay?” Chase asked with raw fear in his voice.
I couldn’t speak, I could barely stand for that matter.
“Blaze, what happened?” Chase asked.
And then I was on the verge of tears even though I didn’t know why I should be so upset. This was my fault, I let Taylor into my life, this was my fault.
“I don’t know.” I said.
And then it was darkness.