Sunday December 21, 2014
They had taken my catheter out yesterday and I had woken twice in the middle of the night to use the restroom. Nathan had stayed the night with me hear, the nurse told him not to sleep in my bed but I didn't care, it didn't put me in any pain. His arm wasn't around me, afraid that it would hurt me if he wrapped his arm around me.
When I woke this morning Nathan wasn't in bed with me anymore and the bathroom door was shut. My morphine pump was out of grasp and my back hurt too much to move. I try to move to get the pump and feel only pain."Hayden?" I look up too see Nathan, his hair was wet...he must have taken a shower.
"Can you get my morphine pump?" I asked and tried again to reach for it again but it caused pain to shoot through my back. I whimper and he rushes over, making me put my arm down as he pressed the pump for me. I sigh, the pain was quickly gone.
"Hayden would you like to watch a movie?" He asks and I nod, as long as he stayed with me I didn't care what we did. He put a DVD into the player attached to the TV and then has a nurse get it to where we could watch it. We sit there watching it for a good hour before I fall asleep against his shoulder. It's a short lived rest because I am quickly woken by the feeling of lips on mine, Nathan's lips to specific. His hand was on my cheek and my face was already flushed.
"Hm Nathan." I murmur before he moves his tongue inside of my mouth. I groan as his tongue dominates mine and soon when he pulls away I'm sitting in a rather odd position on his lap. "Well that was a nice wake up." I say and he smiles kissing my forehead.
"I love you." He says and I can see the smoldering look in his eyes. I sit there frozen for a moment .
"What?" I say, unable to believe that he had said those three words to me.
"I love you Hayden grey. I love you and nothing is going to ever change that. Not the people at school, not jake, and most definitely not your father." He says and kisses me again, it's a huger that I have seen in him twice before. He wants me right now. I reach my hand down, remembering how he said his body had reacted to my kisses. There was a large bulge in the crotch of his jeans. My eyes widen in surprise and I feel him smiling.
"My god" I whisper and he chuckles, moving away from me. His eyes were almost sparkling with happiness. He was surprised that I would touch him like that, but I had to make sure he was reacting the way he says he does. I'm about to move my hand away but he grabs it, holding it there.
"This is my reaction to seeing you Hayden grey, your a walking distraction to me. To tell you the absolute truth about how much I love you. When Ames called and she was hysterical, telling me that you had been thrown in front of a car by jake...my heart had stopped. For a moment my mind and body felt detached and it was because Ames was saying that you weren't breathing correctly. When she got to the hospital she said they were wheeling you into to get the glass plucked out of your back and X-Rays done. I thought I was going to loose you Hayden and not get to say goodbye. I couldn't think about life without you in it...your too important...you can never leave me." He sounded so sad and had let my hand fall from its position. I shook my head feeling the tears coming to my eyes. I sniffled and wiped the tears away as they fell.
"Never...I will never leave you...I wasn't living until I was you. I was a walking ball of numbness, not feeling anything that the people around me did. You make me feel Nathan, you make me almost normal...in a sense." I say and feel more tears rush down my face. He reaches out and wiped them away with his warm fingers. We sat like this for a little longer before we lie down I was lying stomach down on top of him. It was comfortable to lay like this and he was very comfortable.
After a few hours the nurse came in with my discharge papers and Nathan helped me to get ready to go home with him. My body wasn't hurting too bad they had given me some more pain medication and the perception for mine. They wheel me out of the hospital in a wheel chair once I'm dressed and Nathan loads me into his car. We drive around for awhile, talking and singing along to the radio, until we went to get my prescription. Nathan payed for it even though I say that they could just bill my parents, he insists that its him that has to take care of me.
When we get back to his house I am helped inside where his parents are waiting. They tell me to sit on the couch, said that my mother already knew that I was hear because Nathan was so insistent to take care of me. They mentioned that Nathan and Ames wouldn't be here for tomorrow because they had to go visit their grandmother but that I should come to their annual Christmas party on the twenty-third. I told them maybe that I didn't know if my mom wanted to do anything.
The rest of the day I stayed at Nathan's house and relaxed with Nathan and Ames. It was nice until my pain medication started wearing off. It was the first time I have ever screamed in pain. They made me lie flat on my stomach as I cried and my medication tried to run through my system.