My eyes feel heavy, my body feels numb and my leg feels - I can’t even feel anything from it.
With the little strength I have I push my eyelids open. They fall close a few times as I attempt opening them before finally they become lighter allowing movement. The bright fluorescent light obstructs my vision and I clamp my eyes close as pain shoot through them. Damn it! It is like someone just took the sun from space and shone it directly in my eyes.
I slowly open my eyes again allowing them to get use to the light as they water a bit. Soon my eyes become clear and travel around the room I’m in. The grey walls, various health machinery and the small wooden chair to the left of the bed I’m in alert me I’m in a hospital.
What the fuck happened? I feel like I just got run over by a bus.
My eyes drift to the other wooden chair in the room and I find Chev curled up with a blue blanket covering her as she sleeps. Her head is set in an uncomfortable position and her body moves around a little as she tries to find comfort.
I sigh as I try to push myself up in the hospital bed but I find myself stuck in my current position. I look up at what’s causing my immobility and my mouth becomes dry.
My left leg is being held up by different wires, a sling and strings. It’s covered in a white cast except for my toes that peek from the opening. The toes are left out to check for signs of poor circulation that much I remember from my first aid classes. The cast starts at my mid-thigh extending all the way down but that’s not the worst part. I can’t feel anything in that leg, it’s like it’s dead. I wiggle my toes and they move but I can’t feel them at all.
My eyes widen in confusion and horror. My leg’s broken...
Blurry images flash across my mind and it all comes back to me. Me on my bed pathetically crying over Johnattan. The shaking, an earthquake. Calling for Chev but receiving no reply. My stupid heroic dash that ended up with me hitting my head on the floor and the bookcase falling on my leg.
I can’t believe this... Why are bad things happening to me?
Well you did hurt Johnattan so I guess this is your karma, my subconscious states and I clench my teeth.
“You wanted me to leave him... You fucked around in my head and made me leave him,” I argue.
Oh no I didn’t... It was your stupidity in the past with a certain person that pushed you to leave him. It’s not my fault you’re barren. It’s your fault...
My breath hitches, my fists clench at the ‘b’ word and sobs threaten to escape my mouth. Even my inner self blames me, I really am the one who caused this. “It’s my fault.”
“Christina?” A voice calls out and I look over at a glossy eyes Chev.
“Hey,” I croak out with a small smile as I take in her appearance.
Her eyes are droopy and swollen, her face looks drained and she’s not wearing the pyjamas that she borrowed that night but rather a blue T-shirt with ash jeans. Chev still managing to look good in bad situa- wait... My heart drums in my chest and my palms become sticky. Did she just say Christina? I did tell her it’s a part of my name but why did she specifically say that? Why not Izzy?
I look at my friend as she sits up in the chair with a guarded expression on her face and I gulp tensely. She couldn’t know... Could she?
“Chev, why did you just call me Christina?” I ask softly as my heart beat frantically at my chest.
She opened her mouth to reply before closing it. She accesses my face with a little sympathy in her eyes. The fright I am feeling must have transferred to my facial expression. I was so good at hiding emotions why is it so hard to do that now? How could I make one guy make me this emotional? When did I become so weak?
“Isn’t it your name?” She asks after a few minutes cocking her head in confusion.
“Yeah, but I prefer when you call me Izzy,” I reply with a sheepish smile. I had to be careful with what I say I was already threading on thin ice.
She gets up from the chair and walks over to me accessing my body. A grimace forms on her lips as she sees my leg. Her hand rest on my forehead gently before brushing away loose strands from my face.
“Are you okay?” She asks with concern brimming in her dark brown orbs. “Does it hurt?”
I shake my head to signal no but she throws me a look that said ‘spill’. I sigh before looking down at my leg and replying. “Honestly I can’t feel anything in that leg. It’s numb. It responses to movement but I can’t feel the movement.”
She looks at the leg and gulps before looking down at me with... guilty eyes?
“This is not your fault Chev,” I say calmly touching her arm.
“Of course it isn’t!” She explodes with glossy eyes before she starts to pace the area beside the bed moving her hands around wildly. “I wasn’t the one that told you to come look for me. I wasn’t the one that wanted to play Temple run and dashed across that death trap of a room. News flash Izzy, Temple run characters aren’t real when they die they reappear you can’t do that shit! What in the world was going through your head when you did that?”
I look at her stunned, maybe I read her eyes wrong. “Um, I was just worried about you. I guess my mind was in flight mode it didn’t really process much.”
“You think?” She asks as she dries her damp eyes. “You nearly gave me a heart attack when I saw you on the floor with that bookcase crushing your leg. God! Don’t you ever do that again do you hear me?”
I nod and smile at my friend. Chev she is one in a million and I am happy to have the first edition with all its factory faults... Imagine if I had said that statement out loud! Chev would cuss me into oblivion for it but in the end we’d laugh about it after all that brawling. Cause let’s face it no one’s perfect and we all got faults whether factory faults or user indented faults.
“How long have I been out for?” I ask as I look at the blue, tasteless hospital dress I am in.
“About three days,” she says as she sits at the edge of the bed. “Everyone is worried about you Izzy and they are some-”
The sound of the door opening stops Chev’s words as a lady in pink shrubs steps in. A nurse. She acknowledges Chev with a small wave and Chev smiles at her.
She’s a short, red head with a small curvy physique and kind eyes. The type of eyes that can calm a raging storm within you and allow the sun to shine and brighten up your mood. She walks over to the bed I’m in with a kind smile on her face which causes dimples to form on both of her cheeks. “Hello, I’m Trisha your nurse.”
“I’m Isabelle... Well,you already know that... But you can call me Izzy,” I say my thoughts a bit disorientated.
“Well hi Izzy,” she says as she checks the machine beside me. “Sleeping Beauty is finally awake right Chev?” She asks Chev who chuckles.
“Oh trust me she looks far from beautiful right now.”
I glare at her shoving her a a few inches but she just laughs at my actions. “The truth hurts Izzy.”
I roll my eyes and raise my arm a bit as Trisha gestures for me to do so and she holds it up eying the drip needle. “We need to change this.”
Chev pops off the bed as soon as she says that with a grimace. “I hate needles... and the sight of blood.” She scrunches her nose. “I’ll be outside until this is all over. I’m going to sort some things out. Be right back Izzy.”
She smiles at me before pointing to the door and exiting quietly into the hall. As she exits the room a man in a white coat and blue shrubs steps in with a clipboard in his hand. I’m guessing my doctor.
“Hello ladies,” he greets.
“Doctor,” Trisha says as she works on changing the drip.
“Hello,” I say softly my voice a bit hoarse.
He eyes me inspecting my person. “Trisha when you’re done please get ...”
“Izzy, please call me Izzy. Isabelle is too formal,” I interrupt while the doctor gives me a confused look.
“Please get Izzy a bottle of water,” he says and I nod.
He walks over to the front of the bed as Trisha finishes her task and exits the room to get the bottle of water. He checks his clipboard with a small smile.
“By the way I’m Doctor Hylls, nice to meet you.” I nod with a smile that he returns. “Well your leg is quite broken Izzy but it’s not that bad. If you stay off it for a while it’ll be better in give or take three to four months,” he explains with a shrug. “As I said it’s not that bad.”
I nod in relief. “That’s good news but I can’t feel anything. All senses in my leg are numb.”
“That would be the drug. It basically makes your relay neurones dull so the pain won’t be registered to the brain. You’ll get a good batch to help for the first two months then after that we’re taking you off. It won’t sit well to have you on it for the entire time. Your body won’t be able to handle the little pain you’ll get when walking after the cast is removed. That pain will only last for a month or so. So you’ll be totally healed in five to six months,” he states as his green eyes look into mine and I nod. “Now to the most important part... I’m surprised you didn’t ask about it.”
I look at him a bit confused what important part? Isn’t the problem just my leg?
“Maybe you suffered from concussion,” he says scratching his head, messing up his black hair. “We’ll check for that later.”
He takes a deep breath before continuing. He looks like it’s been a long day, he’s a bit droopy and judging by his movements tired.
“Well based on our check-up you’re fine and so is the baby. The fall didn’t hurt the foetus thankfully so you’ll be expecting a healthy baby in six months,” he says looking down at the clipboard. “The drugs we’ve administered won’t affect the baby one bit so he or she will be healthy. It’s made of acetaminophen (the active ingredient in Tylenol) which safe to use during pregnancy.”
When he looks up at me and worry flashes in his eyes. “Izzy are you okay?”
I am frozen in place. I’m not moving nor blinking and I’m barely even breathing.
B- Baby... I am pregnant... I’m pregnant. That explains why I’m so emotional and moody and the weight gain... oh my god... My body is making room for a baby. My baby.
My mind is blank and my heart hammering is the only sound reaching my ears. There is a baby inside of me. I’m carrying a life. And based on what he said I’m three months pregnant.
Johnattan... It’s his baby... Oh my god.
Someone shaking my shoulders shake me from my frozen state. I feel like everything in the universe had stopped and a miracle was performed as they all gave a few minutes of silence to witness it.
Me. A woman who was told she was infertile, barren, is carrying a child... The child of the man I love.
But then everything comes crashing down, shattering the glass walls of my heart. I can’t handle seeing him... I can’t be around him without reliving that night. How can this work? How will this work for our baby?
“How?” I croak out after a few minutes of wondering.
“Oh thank god. I thought you weren’t going to speak ag-”
“How am I pregnant?” I ask again clearly.
He looks at me with raised brows. “Well, when a man and I woman have strong sexual feelings towards each ot-”
“No, that’s not what I meant,” I say a bit distressed. “I was told years ago by my doctor that I was infertile. I won’t be able to get pregnant again. How can I be pregnant?”
He looks over his file with a confused look on his face. “I don’t have that on this file. I’ll have to dig further into your records to explain how this is possible.”
He’ll need my real name to get that information. I need to know how this even possible.
“Doctor, you won’t find it in there. It was recorded under the name Christina Authoró a few years ago,” I say and he looks at me confused.
Just then the door to the room opens and Trisha comes in with the water in tow. She moves from the door to reveal Chev who gives me a small smile. She scratches her head as her feet fidget.
She is nervous... Why?
“There are some people here who wish to see you, Christina,” she says as she steps aside.
Christina? Oh my god.
Long frizzy black hair propped in a ponytail, brown glossy eyes stare back at me. A hand against her swollen stomach and another over her mouth as her droopy eyes take me in. She’s in an off the shoulder blue dress that reaches her above her knees holding back her breasts that threatened to spill over the bust.
They know... Chev knows... They found me ...
“Chrissie?” She says in a trembling voice.
Tears threatened to spill from her eyes and my heart clenches as I look at the state I’ve put my best friend in. She’s in pain, she’s hurting and depressed. The makeup she manages to apply doesn’t hide the bags under her eyes well and that broken look in her eyes...
“Alexis,” I say in shock at the sight of my best friend.
The one who has kept me in check from my break down in college. The one that sacrificed her future for me and what did I do to her? I left her in the middle of her pregnancy. I behaved like a little child.
Child. Oh my god. I’m pregnant again... And Johnattan is the father.
It had to be him... I hadn’t been with anyone else since that night.
I am carrying Johnattan’s baby.
“Oh my god Christina,” she says as she wobbles over to me.
She grabs me in a hug squeezing tightly but not too tight to affect her stomach.
“How did you find me?” I questioned. “How are you here? What-?”
My questions are cut short as my eyes zoom in on the other person at the door.
Long, wild, brown hair. Black and white dress shirt that sucks onto his powerful torso. Black shorts with white Nike sneakers. Electric blue eyes that stare at me with a mix of emotions. Those eyes...
Those blue eyes.
My body stiffens and all of a sudden the room becomes too small. My heart hammers against my chest and I breathe hard as I try to force air into my lungs. My heart picks up its pace as my body shakes with every deep wheeze I release.
I hear someone screaming my name but my ears ring with the beating of my heart. My eyes go from blurry to clear as I notice the panic look on his face. He walks towards me causing my blood flow to quicken. I can’t... He needs to go... I can’t handle seeing him.
“Don’t touch me! Go away,” I yell between wheezes and he stops in his tracks with a pained expression on his beautiful face.
“Please stay away! Don’t touch me!” I say as I try to push myself way from him. I watch as he looks at me frozen in time.
The fear in me rises as I eye his hand that is outstretched to touch me. I can’t! I don’t want to see those haunting blue eyes again! He’ll hurt my baby! He’ll make me get rid of my baby! I can’t.
Before I can even process what I said my mouth moves and Johnattan steps back away from me as I spat the words at him.
“Get the fuck away from me you monster!”
I know I said updates will be next week but due to my works being stolen on wattpad I am permanently migrating here.
I will go back to wattpad once the issue is solved but for now inkitt is my home.
This book will be completed within now and Monday, to facilitate both persons from wattpad and inkitt.