Part 2: What Tomorrow Brings
Amalea catches up with friends and settles into her new reality. This is Amalea’s POV...
Last, I text Deidra, my office mate. I am unsure how she’ll take this latest development.
[Me: I quit LC Corp & check out of town a few days.]
[Me: Yeah, I know. S was being shitty. Told him off & quit.]
[Dee: What an asshole!]
[Dee: Explains a lot & why he’s not here.]
[Me: Oh yeah?]
Of course, I already know why Sam isn’t at work. Hee-hee! This whole thing with him and how it all went down is confusing enough without having to explain it all or even try to make sense of it. There is simply no way I’m talking to Dee about it. At least not today I’m not, if ever. I only don’t want my friend to stress anymore because of the texts from her that I already read. She had gone to my apartment without finding me there and even talked to Manny at the bar because of how disturbed she had been. It wasn’t like me to miss work or happy hour.
[Dee: I told u b4 I think S has a thing 4 u.]
[Me: Stop it! Not even funny!]
[Dee: Seriously. S does.]
[Me: Don’t care.]
[Dee: If true why so bothered by S gettin his knob polished by Loosey Lucy?]
[Me: No, I wasn’t.]
[Dee: Uh-huh. Sure.]
Now she’s hitting a little close to home. I never believe when she teases me about Sam liking me so much he argues with me on purpose because he doesn’t know how else to communicate with me. These few bizarre days with him haven’t involved a helluva lot of conversation either.
Thinking back over our few years working together I can admit that it seemed Dee was right about his feelings. However, Sam would do or say things to piss me off. I sigh not knowing what the hell to think. In the meantime, Dee sends me another text.
[Dee: Hope S finds u & makes this right.]
[Me: OK, I’m outta here. Talk 2 u when I return 2 town next week.]
[Dee: Hope u cool down & decide to come back. Miss u already.]
[Me: Not likely.] I laugh feeling sure Dee is cheering not to have me and Sam breathing over her neck.
[Dee: I can hope can’t I?]
I plan to share more of what’s going on with me when I return to town next week. Right now, I need some time to decide my next move. My feelings are messy and tangled in opposing directions. At the core of it, I experience a love/hate relationship with Sam. It needs resolution.
Before casting my phone aside, I switch it off. I mean to unplug now. Closing my eyes, I sink down in the tub. The warm waters rise right to the nape of my neck.
“Aaaahhhhh,” I exhale at length. Breathing in and holding it a few seconds, I try to relax my mind. I release the breath willing my mind to feel like the rest of body. Calm. Satisfied. I lean the back of my head against the rim of the tub.
Let’s face it… Sam draws me to him somehow. From the moment I see the man during some quarterly meeting, there is something purely magnetic about him. Beyond him looking the handsome badass in his business suit, his green eyes sparkle with animation while delivering his presentation to leadership at the company. His gestures exude confidence.
A few interns like Dee and I are allowed to attend. All of us later after work comment on the same thing. We want to know who that guy is. There's something about him none of us can put our finger on.
Sam is older but handsome when he smiles. Nothing dynamite about his body. Average really. Proportionate. Blondish hair may have had some gray in it but is well kept and an attractive length. If I have to name one feature about him that summed it all, it has to be those green eyes that wrapped all his mystery within them.
So imagine my shock when I see him banging some chick in the back seat of his SUV the day I start work for him! My first day and what an impression he makes. I wonder if I’m expected to fulfill his lust. Nonetheless, it never happens to me.
Sam has no morals. No sense of decorum, but does not once come on to me? Not that I’m advocating sexual harassment, but he does not even try.
I wonder what’s wrong with me. When others at the company try their lame advances, including that douche Andrews, I know better. I’m desirable. It’s all Sam.
The more I fight wanting his attention, the stronger his allure to me becomes. I am not comfortable with this because I know the type of man he is. Arrogant. Impetuous. Brilliant. Charming. Bad boy. The latter is a classic weakness of mine, which is why Rayna worries about me all the time. That moth and flame shit get me burnt every time.
I resist the appealing spark every chance I get when close to Sam. I argue with him just to distract myself from the truth. I quit because I don’t like how he treats me, but that’s not all. Even more disturbing is how I feel about him. The tension in the air is thicker than San Francisco fog, and I’m suffocating in it.
To make things worse, I believe that Dee is right. For months now, I swear I see what she’s talking. It’s more evident when I no longer catch “Loosey” Lucy blowing Sam under his desk. Mysteriously such lecherous activity stops with her and with the new interns who come on board.
Some speculation drifts in the company about Andrews finally having a chance with the newbies. It makes little sense to me. It’s not like my ex-boss is any spring chicken anymore in his late 40s. However, his age hinders nothing we’ve done together these few days. I have been delightfully surprised.
Sam kissing me and feeling me up in his office confirms all my doubts and makes it real. My reaction is deplorable. His boldness should repulse me. I hate how he treats Dee and me daily without common courtesy. When his lips touch mine though, I am overcome with a grand ball of excitement. The way Sam tastes is the best thrill. When he dares kidnap me and have his way with me, I should fear him. Normal people, after all, don’t do things like that or have naughty collections as he does in their basements.
This is crazy! I do fear him at first until I understand he doesn’t intend to hurt me. What does Sam want? My submission and complete surrender. Good luck.
Funny thing is his wants mirror the ones I suppress regarding him. That’s the secret I dare not even contemplate except in my darkest dreams. Every forbidden wicked thing I ever want to do to Sam comes to life in me when brought to his kinky little dungeon. I never realize how it would make me feel to want to punish my ex-boss and to have him fully submit to me.
Even more shocking is the confession Sam makes about his own behavior and the loss of his family that drives it. I do not know what to make of it or the fact that he actually shares something so deeply personal with me. He’s never trusted me like that before. I can hardly believe it or the realization of how lonely he is. I know that feeling all too well. Since my boyfriend Jake died during his military service, I only have sexual relationships and am not interested in much else.
There’s only so much vanilla sex I can take before my desire to dominate takes center stage. I usually break up with the guy well before then. My tastes always were peculiar, but not to Sam. He all but embraces what I offer him.
It seems we have more in common than either of us could know. We can switch and give each other the chance to be dominant and the other submissive although a very, very disobedient one. What fun we have in this power exchange I never think possible. Not with anyone since Jake, and so I resign to be alone. I do not feel alone anymore though. I’ve found a kindred spirit although an unlikely one.
Our prowess for kinky sex notwithstanding, there feels born unto us a real passion for each other. A connection that may stem beyond the sex, at least that’s the way it seems. Perhaps I am reading too much into this. Sam and I confessed to refraining from sex for a while, and the euphoria of discovering something new encompasses us.
Sam is as tireless in his domination of me as I am with him. This thing between us is so explosive when we gaze, taste, and bow to our needs in and out of bed. We want more and find it in satisfying each other making full use of his playroom. We move as one like old lovers. We tease and push one another to the edge of bliss, torment the other to our limits and then finally grant the release that we seek.
It amazes me we’ve been at this so long that I am physically and mentally exhausted. I wake, feeling hung over from a bender to the extreme, sore in every muscle I own and happier than I’ve been in a long time. Not lost on me is the cause of it being a green-eyed monster who has been a terror to me.