Chapter 10: No Space When You're a Creep Magnet
When I said I wanted space I didn’t really expect them to give me space.
And I was right to not expect it, because now I feel like the space between all of us is so close that I have no room to breathe.
We’re currently sitting on my couch watching an old school horror flick. I’m in the middle. Levi fell asleep on my shoulder and Silas won’t stop pressing close to me and trying to hold my hand.
Now I know what you’re thinking.
Rin how on earth did you end up in this situation? Didn’t you say you wanted space?
Well I’ll tell you exactly what happened.
Yesterday I said I wanted space. Levi agreed. Silas didn’t.
Nevertheless, it was implied they’d both give me space whether they liked it or not.
So today started off normal. I woke up to breakfast and small talk, but none of them really bugged me too much. I walked to school by myself. Neither of them bother me in class and I didn’t sit with either of them at lunch. I then walked home alone after last period.
Because I was the first one back home I decided to take advantage of the television and couch in the living room.
I made myself some popcorn, popped open a can of Dr. Dew cola, and started to watch a marathon of classic horror movies.
I only got through two and a half movies in peace before Silas got home and decided to sit down next to me and start trying to subtle touch my hand when he thought I wouldn’t notice. I ignored him the whole time.
At the end of the third movie Levi came home. Seeing Silas and me on the couch he immediately sat on the other side of me. By the middle of the fourth movie he was already a sleep, his head resting on my shoulder.
Silas is still trying to touch me even though I keep moving every time he does.
It’s so freaking suffocating.
I know, I know. It doesn’t seem like a big deal, but really isn’t this too much? Can’t a girl just watch some horror films in peace without being bothered by one guy drooling on her shirt and the other trying to get some skinship action?
I can’t even focus on the movie because I’m too conscious of them both. My heart won’t calm the hell down. It feels like it’s beating twice as fast as usual.
“Hey, Rin. Rin. Hey. Hey Rin. Rin. Rin. Hey. Hey Rin. Rin.” Silas keeps repeating those two words again and again in varying combinations. Nothing else, but "hey" and "Rin". I ignore him at first just like I ignore his wandering hands, but he keeps on and on until I can’t take it anymore.
“What?!” I snap out feeling very annoyed and agitated.
Levi startles awake, but doesn’t move his head off my shoulder.
I glance at him. “Sorry.” I say, though I feel like maybe I shouldn’t be apologizing. He shouldn’t have been sleeping on my shoulder in the first place. I shouldn’t have to feel bad about accidentally waking him up.
“I just thought it was weird that you’re watching horror movies. Shouldn’t you be watching those boring and cheesy chick flicks that girls like so much. I can’t even tell you how many times a girl was dragged me to a theater to see the same recycled romantic babble again and again. Woman meets man. They fall madly in love. Something happens. They’re separated. One of them dies but leaves something behind for the living one. Tears and broken hearts everywhere. The end. I just summarized ninety percent of the girly bullshit in like ten seconds.” Silas rambles out.
I stare blankly at him. “First of all, you know I hate chick flicks.” I start, pausing to take a breath. “Second, did you seriously annoy me all this time just to criticize something that was nothing to do with what we’re watching? Third, why are you guys bugging me when I’m trying to watch movies?” I mutter out.
Levi sighs as he moves his head. “Sorry. I didn’t know I was bugging you. I just…” He trails off and shakes his head. “It’s nothing.” He mumbled.
“I just want to spend time with you.” Silas then says.
I give him a skeptical look. “What happened to giving me space?” I ask.
Silas makes a face. “I never agreed that I would. Only Levi did. He’s the one who’s not giving you space like he said he would.” He points out.
I look to Levi.
His eyes are anywhere other than on me. “To be fair, I don’t think any man would just stand and watch as another guy makes advances at the woman he loves. So yeah, I can’t give you space if Silas won’t give you space too. I won’t be idle and let him win you over.” He tells me.
I let out a huge groan. When will this ever end? Maybe life would be easier if I was a brainless girl who’s only point of living was to hook up with guys.
Easier as in I would be too stupid to realize how wrong and unethical that is.
I have too much to think about other than just guys. Obviously. If I only thought about guys then things wouldn’t be like this and I wouldn’t have to deal with guys trying to kiss me and touch me and confess their love to me.
Sometimes I wonder if I stepped into an alternative universe where I’ve suddenly become popular.
“I’m not making advances on the woman you love. I’m making advances on the woman I love. There’s a difference.” Silas says as he leans over to poke his brother in the chest.
Next thing I know they’re both leaning over me, glaring and arguing with each other.
Jeez. Not again...
I slip out from underneath and make my way to the kitchen. I grab a bag of potato chips before going upstairs to my bedroom.
Usually I’d yell at them for arguing/fighting in my house, but at this point I just can’t seem to give a damn.
I lock my door behind me, lay down on my bed, and eat potato chips until I fall asleep.
In the morning there’s no breakfast made. Both Levi and Silas aren’t around.
I pour myself some good ol’ cereal and milk. I enjoy the nice quiet space and the lack of awkward tension. After getting ready for school I walk the two miles it takes to get there.
In chemistry Silas seems to only talk about the lab assignment we’re doing. Even though he doesn’t say much I see that he is watching me with an expression I can’t quite understand. It’s like he has more to say, but can’t bear to say it out loud so he just doesn't.
A speechless Silas is a tolerable Silas.
In AP English Levi doesn’t pass me any notes, but he does copy off my homework while the teacher isn’t looking. I kind of miss our interactions, but at least now it seems like he’s serious about giving me some space.
Speaking of space, that Colby guy- that bastard who kissed me in my sleep- has been leering at me in every class I’ve had him in. Apparently he's in my AP History, Pre-Calculus, and gym class.
Currently I unfortunately have gym class.
I can’t concentrate on playing volley ball with the girls, because I can practically feel his gaze on my ass.
Am I a guy magnet now? Do I attract guys with bad taste and no morals? Well, besides Levi he at least has morals...
I try so hard not to pay attention to the weirdness of this guy who is constantly staring at me.
God, he might even be worse than Silas. He must be even more of an enemy to all women.
After gym class, as I walk out of the girls’ locker room after changing I hear someone call out my name.
Oh great. This weirdo now knows my name. “Yes?” I reply back giving him the ‘bitch, I will cut you’ look so he’ll hopefully get the hint and turn his ass around and pretend he didn’t see me.
It isn't effective at all.
Am I not threatening enough?
“I just wanted to apologize about the other day. I shouldn’t have kissed you, but in my defense I think anyone would have kissed you. You looked so cute in your sleep, mumbling and thrashing around and stuff. I couldn’t resist.” He says.
Creepy. So. Freaking. Creepy. Nope. Just Nope. No. No. No.
I’m going to pretend he didn’t just say all that.
“Goodbye.” I say quickly before turning around and walking away as fast as I can.
He calls out my name again as I leave, but I don’t turn around.
I’ve seen too many horror movies to know where this is going. He’s going to become obsessed with me know and then want to skin me and wear my skin as a suit. Either that or he’s going to kill me and do gross perverted things to my dead body.
Yes, I know I’m overreacting, but I mean it when I say I get the creeps and over all bad vibes coming from this guy.
He is not normal.
Even Silas wouldn’t say that gross crap he was spewing out. Not that Silas is normal either. The only normal guy in my life is Levi, and even then I question how normal he is.
Because of my encounter with Colby I wait at Levi’s truck after school. I don’t feel safe enough to walk home.
When Levi gets done with practice and sees me waiting for him he seems confused as he walks towards the truck. “Is something wrong?” He asks.
I can’t stop myself from opening up my mouth and venting. “Yes, yes, a thousand times yes. This new transfer student is… He’s bothering me. He kissed me the other day when I fell asleep in a club room. Now he’s coming up to me and saying creepy shit. I just can’t take it. It’s bad enough that I have to worry about things with you and Silas, but this guy… God. I just get a bad vibe from him. I know he didn’t do anything wrong yet… Actually scratch that, he kissed me while I was unconscious. That is a hell of a lot wrong. I punched him for it though so it’s alright, but still… No actually it’s not alright. It’s not alright at all. I’m tired of getting kissed. First it was Silas. Now it’s this guy. Do people not know boundaries anymore? You can’t just go around kissing girls. It’s gross and morally wrong. I don’t like it. I don’t like it one bit. I wish I could forget all about it. I wish I could forget all about everything that’s been happening.” I can’t help but rant out all my feelings.
Levi just listens. When I’m done he wraps his arms around me, pulling me into a hug. “I’m sorry, Rin.” He murmurs out quietly as he holds me.
After a few second I wrap my arms around him, hugging him back. “Forget what I said about giving me space. I don’t want space. Not if you guys giving me space means another guy is going to try something.” I mumble out.
I feel like a child holding onto a blanket.
God, Levi makes me feel so safe. Why did I ever want him to give me space in the first place? I would go crazy without him. I need him by my side. It’s only natural.
We just stand here hugging each other for awhile until someone makes a sound and we jump apart.
Silas looks at me with an upset expression. “Oh, so I have to give you space, but he doesn’t?” He asks.
I bite my lip as I shake my head. “I was wrong. I don’t want space. I can’t deal with space. I’ll do crazy without Levi’s comfort and with your annoyance.” I tell him.
Silas smiles slightly. “Really?” He says as he reaches out for me.
I don’t reach out towards him in return, but instead move away from him. “That doesn’t mean that I want you to touch me.” I point out as I give him a sharp look.
Silas pouts while Levi laughs.
We get into Levi’s truck and go home.
If only I knew at that time that we were being watched...