Dylan is here... Why is he here?!
“Yeah... I met him on my way over here... He wasn’t sure if you guys had moved or not...” Uncle Ryan states as he pats Dylan’s shoulder.
He’s here! Fuck!
I stand there as the thought goes through my head over and over again. This isn’t good at all. My parents are in the dining room, so is our child and my fiancé. He needs to leave... Oh my god imagine what could happen!
My dad has been itching to lay Dylan on his ass for impregnating his little girl. My brother is just waiting on the right opportunity to show the skeletons in my closet and Roberto, how would he take it all? I’m royally fucked.
“Is your pops here?” Uncle Ryan asks knocking me out of my inner turmoil.
Clearing my throat, I attempt to put a smile on my face as I reply. “Yeah, the family is in the kitchen. C-Come in and wait here... I’ll tell them you’re here.”
I scurry away from the living room returning to the dining room quickly grabbing my mother evading questions thrown at me. I pull her into the kitchen throwing a ‘We’ll be right back’.
I release her as I start to freak out, my breaths coming out as pants.
This- pant - can’t - pant - be - pant - happening!
“Honey, what’s wrong?” my mother worriedly asks as she grabs a hold of my shoulders.
I try to say the words but my need for air causes them to die on my tongue. Mom’s motherly senses seemed to have kicked in as she quickly makes me sit, placing my head between my legs. I blow out harsh breaths as my heartbeat starts to slow considerably. My mind clears and my calm returns.
Hearing the change in my breathing Mom kneels on the floor in front of my combing away strands of hair from my face with her fingers.
“What’s wrong, honey?” she asks calmly.
Gulping, I hold her arm for support as the words fall from my lips. “When I went to the door Uncle Ryan was there-”
“Well, why would that cause you to have a panic attack -?”
“He wasn’t alone,” I say and she looks at me confused. “D-Dylan was there with him... Mom, they’re both in the hall.”
Her eyes widen as her lips part and understanding finally dawns on her. She looks into my eyes and a look of disbelief crosses her face.
“Fuck,” she whispers and my thoughts are confirmed... I’m royally fucked.
I sit in my chair uneasily, my eyes are glued to the meal before me as I feel his heavy gaze on me. This was not what I expected mom to do and I don’t like it one bit.
“Indiana,” my name slips off his lips in a sickly sweet way and my heart bleeds with each syllable. “Could you pass the salt?”
I look to the container to my left and slowly clench it in my hands. Taking the risk, I look up into those beautiful blue-green eyes. The ones that broke my heart so long ago.
Outstretching my arm, I hand him the salt and he grabs it with a smile as his fingers touched mine. He thanks me and I quickly pull my hand away with a nod of my head.
The room falls into an eerie silence once more and I mentally sign. The tension is so thick in here you could butcher it with a knife.
“So Cristiano,” Roberto says from beside me and I tense. And it begins. “I wasn’t aware you knew Indiana, basically family.”
My eyes focus on Dylan as he swallows the forkful he just placed in his mouth before replying to Roberto.
“I didn’t think it’d matter. Business is business and family relations don’t have an ounce of importance when conducting them,” he states staring down my fiancé.
“I’d have to agree,” Roberto states before gently taking my hand in his. “Now I understand why you were so skittish at lunch. Cristiano here put you on edge.”
“So Indie had met Dy- sorry I mean, Cristiano before now?” my brother asks with a grin on his face. He’s having a blast basking in my misery.
“Yes, at a business lunch,” Roberto replies taking a sip of his wine oblivious to the tension in the air.
“Interesting...” Christan grins leaning back in his chair before helping to clean the sauce of Diana’s face.
“Interesting indeed,” Dad states stiffly gaining my attention. He’s stoic and mom is grasping his hand soothing him, calming him.
Before Dylan and Uncle Ryan were invited by my mother to join us, mom ensured she spoke to Dad and Christan about making a scene in front of everyone especially Diana. They reluctantly agree not wanting to piss off mom and well here we all are trying to act civil.
“So Uncle Ryan,” Joanna says steering the conversation towards my dad’s best friend. “What you been up to for the last year? We’ve barely heard from you.”
“Oh, nothing much. I decided to visit the beaches in Jamaica, the beautiful architecture of Rome and backpacked through Germany...”
Uncle Ryan lightens the mood by enthusiastically telling us stories from his many adventures and I thank my lucky stars for it. Grasping my fiancé’s hand, I relax finally enjoying this dinner but that doesn’t last very long. His glare burns into the side of my head but I continue to avoid him hoping he’ll move his gaze elsewhere. Given his gaze did refocus, but not where I would’ve liked.
“Uncle Ry, could I come with you on your next adventure?” Diana asks with big wondrous eyes once her plate was empty. As she speaks Dylan watches her and I watch him hoping he doesn’t start speculating anything.
“I would like that kiddo but you’d have to get the go-ahead from your mama and papa,” Uncle Ryan replies ruffling her hair.
“Well can I go, Nala?” she asks turning to face me.
The action catches the attention of everyone at the table and the silence that sweeps over the room is deafening. I freeze, my hands stiffening in Roberto’s own causing him to ask me if I’m okay.
“Well, Nala? Can I please?” she asks jutting out her lip.
I clear my throat and try to act like that little slip up meant nothing.
“Well, I’m not sure Ki-Ki. Why don’t you ask mom and dad?” I say calmly, applauding myself for not stuttering.
The realization of what she’d done flashes on Diana’s face and she grimaces. “My bad Nala... Sometimes you’re more like a mom than a big sis.”
Christan snorts from beside Diana and she elbows him with a pout. “Don’t laugh at me!”
He chuckles pinching her cheek. “I’m not laughing at you little one... I’m just amused by that statement.”
He grins at me and I shoot him a glare but inside my heart is bleeding.
My bad Nala... Sometimes you’re more like a mom than a big sis
She shouldn’t have been accustomed to saying that... to lying. Every time she does it, it just proves how bad of a mother I am.
“Indie,” my mom calls and I look up schooling my features, holding back my tears. “Why don’t you take Diana upstairs and get her ready for bed.”
Nodding, I begin to rise from my chair excusing myself. I avoid Dylan’s stare before reaching for Diana’s hand as we make our way to the stairs.
“I’m sorry momma,” Diana says as we reach her room.
Taking her in my arms, I shake my head my eyes becoming blurry. “It’s okay baby... I’m the one that’s sorry. You shouldn’t have had to say that.”
“Okay, momma,” she murmurs in the crook of my neck, tightening her hold on me.
“Is he my daddy?” she asks seconds later and I close my eyes taking a deep breath.
“Yes, he is.”
“Does he know I’m his daughter, Nala?”
“No baby, but he’ll know soon,” I say pulling back to look in her eyes. “They’ll all know and we won’t have to hide it...”
“Okay...” she whispers before smiling and playing with strands of my hair. “My daddy is cute!”
I chuckle, caressing her face. “Yes, he is, baby girl. Now let’s get you ready for bed.”
Climbing out of my arms, she scurries to the bathroom and I smile as I watch her brush her teeth dancing to the music within her head.
She’s the best thing to ever happen to me and I’d go through all that heartache again if it meant having her.
Minutes later, she’s all tucked in and asleep. I make my way downstairs to see Dad, Mom and Uncle Ryan heading towards the door.
“Thanks for squeezing me in for dinner.”
“It’s no problem,” mom says while dad goes in to hug his friend.
I exit the hall unnoticed making my way to the dining room. I come face to face with my brother and I mentally groan.
“Where’s everyone?” I ask as I start taking up champagne glasses from the dining table.
Looking up, he doesn’t smile like I’m used to but rather gazes at me with no emotion.
“Joanna went to her room, Uncle R is leaving so Mom and Dad went to see him off. That fiancé of yours is outside on some business call and your ex-lover is on dish duty.”
“Christan, please not now,” I say, addressing the last jab.
“You’ll have to face the truth soon Indie,” he taunts and my patience wears thin.
“Don’t you think I know that?!” I snap looking up at my big brother. “I am trying to work it out. I can’t be like you, doing whatever I want and not think of the consequences. If I tell the truth now they’ll attack her. She won’t be able to go out without paparazzi crowding her. I can’t let that happen to her! I might not have made the best choices but I’m sure tr –”
He takes me in his arms and I shut up instantly enjoying the brotherly hug. It’s something I haven’t gotten in a while...
We don’t speak, it’s not needed. All we do is relish in the fact that for the first time in five years we aren’t cussing each other about our lifestyles... even it’s just for a few minutes.
“Here are some more glasses,” I say as I enter the kitchen where Dylan is.
It took a whole lot out of me to walk in here but didn’t cave even when Christan offered to bring them in for me. I need to face him, to tell him the truth.
“Thanks,” is his only reply and I nod placing them on the counter beside him.
We stay there for a few minutes not saying a word to each other. Finally having too much of this silent treatment I speak.
“Dylan,” I call and he finally looks at me, trapping me with his eyes. “I have something I need to say to you.”
“…and what would that be Ana?” he asks nonchalantly.
“Dylan, I have something to tell you,” I say, biting my lip.
“…and would that be my little Ana?” he asks as his fingers played my breasts like a violinist plays his violin.
“Um...” I say as I fight the sensations he evokes in me. “Can you please stop that?”
“Fine,” he says resting his hand on my stomach on top of his white sheets. “What is it you want to say?”
Looking up at him, my gut clenched and I wonder if it’s the right time.
“It’s nothing,” I chicken out my cheeks heating up.
“Oh, come on. Tell me,” he says caressing my cheek and I sign deciding to tell him. “Promise I won’t laugh.”
Okay... Here goes nothing. You can do it, Indiana.
“I love you,” I say closing my eyes.
His hand on my cheek freezes and feel my heart halt in my chest. For minutes he doesn’t move but when he does it’s not towards me, it’s away.
I hear him leave the bed, pull on some clothes and exit the room, his room. When the door closes, I open my eyes and I am truly alone.
I silently get dressed, leaving his room before finding my own and crying my eyes out.
Clenching my fist, I banish the memory and the heartache I feel... felt. I will not become that person again.
“Please, can you not call me that?” I ask as I watch him wash the sauce off the plates.
“…and why is that? Isn’t it apart of your name, Ana?” his eyes are lethal as they meet mine and my knuckles turn white as I control my temper.
“I don’t care don’t ever call me that. That name was when I made the mistake of being yours-”
“Mistake?” he says dropping the dishes and drying his hands. He was now facing me and I fight the urge to cave and run back to the other room.
“It may have ended badly but it was never a mistake and you know it!” he firmly states. “You loved being mine, you loved submitting to me...and I loved being yours.We will always be the best thing in your life... Never a mistake.”
Taken aback, my jaw almost hits the ground. This man... This bastard who broke my fucking heart has the balls to tell me... Oh, fuck no...
Straightening my spine, I stare straight into his eyes before I say this line.
“Let’s get this straight... I submitted to you once, shame on me but I will never submit twice... papí...” I say scornfully watching as a crooked grin slips onto his face.
Oh so he thinks I’m joking, does he...
“So you find all this funny?!” I whisper-yell. “Was it funny when you left me eight years ago?! Did you laugh when you used me and went on to fuck another woman?! Was it fun playing with my heart, my love?! Hear me when I say this Dylan Cristiano Jacobs, I will never fall back into your lies. I will never be yours again. I have met a man that respects and treasures me and I’d rather die than give myself to you again!”
His smile is wiped instantly off his face and his eye twitches. At this my stomach drops, I take a step back and he follows me with a dark look in his eyes... He’s mad... This is not good.
“Now you listen to me, Ana and get this straight.” The nickname opens a wound in my heart and I close my eyes in pain.
He grips my chin roughly and my eyes snap open. “Regardless of what your mouth says Ana, you and I both know your heart says differently. You know we have a connection. We are made for each other and regardless of whatever happens you’ll always fucking love me.”
The way he says it isn’t to force the belief on me but rather to get a confirmation. It is like he’s trying to assure himself I’ll always love him.
He might be right... Regardless of what happened my heart will always love him, but he has hurt me and I will not set myself up for heartbreak again. No man is worth that no matter how much I love him.
“I will never love you again,” I say through gritted teeth. “You will never get another chance to break me... All I feel for you is hatred, pure, raw hatred.”
The fire rages in his eyes and he moves so fast my brain fails to process it. He’s pressed against me, trapping my hands. My ring clinks as it hits the wall and he looks over at it, his face growing even more viscous.
“This is mine,” he says harshly cupping my cunt through my jeans and I jut, biting my lip. “And no one is going to stop me from claiming it, claiming you! So I’d lose the attitude Ana or I’ll fuck you right here not caring if your parents, sister, or fiancé hear you coming on my dick.”