Friendship, Love and Hate

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Chapter 19 <I forgive you>

Me and Aaron decided to meet up in a park. It was already dark out and I was sitting on a bench waiting for him. It was kind of pathetic knowing that I couldn’t deal with my problems alone. I didn’t need Aaron to say anything to me or do anything. I just wanted him to be near. He wouldn’t even need to speak at all.

I hear footstep coming from behind me. I expected to see just Aaron there. I didn’t have any time to ask when Aaron started explaining “I heard you two had a fight so I brought Riley along. You two are friends and you should probably make up as soon as possible.” He explained and I walked up to Riley taking her in a big hug. Aaron and Riley were acting like high school ending was the end of the world.

“You know that I just care about you right?” I asked speaking in her hair.

“I know. But please don’t worry about me. I don’t want that.” She said and I didn’t argue any further. I broke the hug and walked up to Aaron.

“Thanks for coming” I extended my arms asking for a hug. He didn’t hesitate one bit and pulled me in a tight hug. “Call me anytime you need someone to talk to.” He broke the hug to take my face in his hands. “I will always be here when you need to” he said whispering so only I could hear.

“All right. Let’s get this shit out of the way” Riley said sitting down and pulling us with her “what’s wrong Tori?” She asked.

I big sigh escaped me. “My mom and sister came back”

“Oh” Riley said instantly. “Well that must suck.” Yup it sucks a lot. It sucks so much that I almost hate that they are here.

“How did it went?” Aaron asked. This was the side of Aaron that I loved. When he wasn’t arguing and being cold. But just being nice. And asking a simple question.

“They are my family and I love them, but I don’t want them in my life.” I laughed “god I am such a horrible person” how can one hate his family that much.

“You’re not” Riley assured me “they did a horrible thing by leaving. And even I am mad at them.” Riley said and that made me laugh.

A moment of silence were around us. “How are you feeling?” Aaron asked again.

I didn’t thought about what was I feeling or what should I be feeling. “I don’t know...anger maybe? Sadness. I don’t know.” Most of the times I have trouble explaining in words how I am feeling and I hate that I am not knowing such a thing about myself.

“Hard to identify what emotions are you feeling. When you are feeling too much. Huh.” Aaron stated looking in a distance. Wise words I may say. Aaron knows a lot about life. He had some great quotes up his sleeves. The quotes I had never heard and quotes that were so deep it made me believe every word and not forgetting them for weeks.

“You guys maybe want to go to that coffee place?” I asked them. I really didn’t want this night to be just about me being depressed again.

“Yea sure. I could use a warm cup of cocoa. “Riley said. Aaron drove us there since he had car with him.

We entered the coffee place. And there were couple other familiar people.one person was my physics teacher, sitting with a women, I assume his wife. One person was Simon, he glared at me for split second but we are just strangers. One person was Liam that I noticed. I am not mad at him anymore. I should but I’m not. Kind of weird actually. And just to be clear. Liam was never the only reason I wanted to kill myself. It was all the small things combined until there was no other place and I was about to explode. To this day I think if Aaron wouldn’t come would I do it. Would I have the guts to do it? The selfishness of doing it.

“Hey I’m going to call someone real quick” Aaron said and walked away from us while we took a seat at one of the booths.

Riley ordered herself cocoa and I got tea. Since Riley knows Aaron best she got him cacao as well.

Riley had told me that when they were little they were really close. They took baths together. And their parents would think that they will grow up and marry. But Riley said that they were always like sibling. Riley doesn’t have sisters or brothers, but family isn’t always by blood. As time passed they fell apart but Riley still felt the brotherly bond with him even when he was gone. But now they are good friends again. It’s kind of funny to think that life could take such circle around. Like for instance my life started to change when I met Aaron and other guys at this very place.

The one person who I thought would never speak with me came. If anything I would think that Simon would come up and talk but it turned out to be Liam “hey Victoria. Riley” he greeted but I really wasn’t in the mood. “What do you want Liam?” I realized that I answered a bit harsh. This was the first time he spoke to me since the incident.

“Listen. I know that what I’m about to say doesn’t make any difference but for what’s its worth. I am sorry for what I did.” He sincerely apologized. I knew that he was speaking truth. This time really I could tell he was sorry. He looked really drained out, and nervous.

What difference would I make if I forgive him? Or don’t...

“Took you long enough” I just let it go “I forgive you Liam” I said.

Liam lit up. “Okay. Cool. Am have a great night” he looked like he was on top of the world now. That’s how much forgiveness can do to people. As long as I made one person lit up I am doing something right. I wasn’t sure if he deserved it or not. But I believe that fate has a plan for everyone and she is the one to give punishments or honor for good deeds.

As soon as he left I saw that Aaron heard everything and he probably has something to say about this, he always has...

He eyed me. “Go ahead.” I just say to him. Ready for the impact of his words.

“I’m not going to say anything” that was something new.

“Literally. Why?” I asked confused.

Aaron smirked “what do you want me to say.”

“I don’t know. Like always that I am naive and stupid. Don’t you think that?” I asked challenging. He hadn’t called me that for a while now. I knew that he had good intensions with me and he wasn’t completely cold towards me.

He looked in my eyes “I do think you are naive and stupid” this time he said it in a playful way, last time he said that we were arguing. “But I am still here. So there must be something more about you than just that.”

We were all chatting about nothing and everything when a loud noise filled our table. “Whooooo. Road trip!” It was Max screaming and plopping next to me, almost in my lap to be exact I was lucky to move in time.

I looked over my shoulder and saw Harry and Jack walking in.

Riley now spoke “what are you guys doing here?” And how did they know we were here.

Max looked at Aaron confused “I thought we are going to camp side.” He asked whining.

“We are. I just didn’t have the time to tell them” Aaron stood. Up “c’mon lets go. We don’t have much time” he extended his hand for me to take it. And I didn’t hesitate.

“What if I don’t want to go?” I asked him through my lashes.

“I have a feeling you want to go.” He told me smirking.

I and Riley drove with Aaron “what’s at that camp side?” I asked him.

“You like it. I promise” was all he said.

It wasn’t even ten minutes when we arrived at this place. It has a lot of old cabbing around but everything was quiet, it looked abandoned. How do guys find these kind of places? Do they just walk around until they find abandoned place.

Guys leaded us into a forest. I whisper shouted Riley something making sure that guys heard me “Riles, I think they are going to murder us.” Riley laughed.

And then Jack turned to us “oh shit. They know our plan” he said sarcastically.

And of course Harry needed to be smartass. “It would be pretty easy to be honest” he pointed out and Max got involved. “Yea we could totally run after you without breaking a sweat.”

“Is it far?” Riley finally asked.

“Almost there” Aaron answered.

We came to one of the most beautiful places I have seen with my eyes. It was lake in the middle of the woods we were standing on a little cliff it was only a meter high but still considerate cliff. I am not lying when I say that water was completely clear. It was full moon tonight so thankfully it made this even more beautiful. And because of the moon no flashlight needed.

I was so caught up admiring the view I didn’t notice that Max had stripped to his underwear and was now full speed running to water before jumping in screaming “Geronimo!”

All the guys started stripping and got in the water.

“You going to go in?” Riley asked beside me.

“Only if you are” I said and she smiled at me only tearing up.

We both stripped to our underwear. And thank god I was wearing matching undies. I wasn’t insecure about my body usually, but now I saw Aaron eyeing me and suddenly I felt nervous. What if he thinks I’m hideous? He didn’t have any expression on his face, completely cold.

I and Riley were taking this jump to dramatically. Riley was standing and the edge and I grabbed her hand. “If you jump, I jump.” I said to her “until death do us apart” she added and looked to the water and then we jumped in. And heard some ‘whoos’ from boys.

Aaron swam next to me “to make that kind of jump you must have some guts.” he mocked me.

“Are you mocking me?” I acted offended.

He shook his head. “Oh no. I could never. Very brave move”

I hit him playfully laughing and he just splashed me once. “Stop!” I yelled at him. Riley and boys were a couple meters away splashing each other.

The water was wormer than expected, under all that yelling from Riley and boys I could still hear crickets around. Aaron was looking at me, I wondered what was going on inside his head.

“Victoria” Aaron spoke. “Will you be my girlfriend?” He asked me shocking me. If this is him being dumb and joking around I didn’t like it. He said it in a way too serious way for my liking.

“What? No!” I answered.

“Why not?”

“Are you for real? Where is this even coming from?”

“I like you.” He pointed out. And I liked him too but...

I reasoned “Aaron you are going to France in three months.”

“I know.” He simply answered still looking me dead in the eyes.

Maybe it was the cold water or the moon that makes people do weird things but I swam to Aaron and kissed him. I know that everyone else saw it. Because loud gasps escaped their mouths and ‘you go girl’ from Max.

I broke off the kiss and he spoke “I hate PDA” he smirked.

I swam to Riley but stopped mid-way to look back “that meant yes” I said to him. Was this me being easy? I don’t know. But I didn’t care at the time.

It felt like everything was falling in place...

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