Chapter 8 <What if he regrets>
Walking back to my house I tried to text Liam but it appeared he had blocked me...
What was going on? What did I do? Did I say something wrong or do something... that picture wasn’t such a big deal. Why did I react that way. He probably now thinks I’m some kind of control freak.
Okay I will not freak out.. tomorrow I will go talk to him. Yea... that seams like a wise choice.
I really don’t want to ruin anything with Liam, I really really like him.
I enter my house and see my dad sitting in the living room. With slightly dimmed lights Reading a book. My dad loved to read, he read all the time when he wasn’t working. But that didn’t happen often. He had become workaholic.
“Hey dad” I greet him. And go sit next to him on the couch getting comfortable in the few pillows that were there.
“Hi Tori. ” he answers and puts his book down. “Where were you? Its already eight” he questions me. I forgot to tell him I’ll be late. But he trusts me. He says I’m old enough and responsible enough to not have a curfew. But I still think I need to tell him where I am. Even tough this was the first time in a while I’m actually staying out late.
“I was at a friends house” I say to him.
My dad raised one of his eyebrows “a boy friend?” he asks suspicious.
I laugh at him “no. A girl friend. Her name is Riley and she is really nice actually”
“Well then I’m glad you are having fun” he says.
“Hey dad” I was trying to gather the right words “can I ask you something?” He just nodded.
“Are you happy with your life right now” I ask sincerely.
He lets out a chuckle “I have you, Cameron and that makes me feel happy, you two are the best things that ever happened to me. You two are my children and therefore you two are my everything. And I love you both very much” he says but leaves out Veronica.
“What about Veronica?” I ask him.
“Yea” My dad sighted heavily “I love Veronica too. I know that she is not here and possibly may have never return, but she still is my daughter and I will always love her.”
“And mom?” I ask.
“Since she left” he continued after a moment. “She is only your mother to me. And nothing more. She did a terrible thing when she left and that’s something I will never forgive her. Not because she left me heartbroken at the time, but because she left her kids, and that the last memory of her you have is her being an alcoholic. She is nothing to me now.” He explained.
“You are mad at her?” He must be! right?
“If I was mad at her that meant that I felt something towards her. I am not mad at her, I just don’t care for her anymore. She is a stranger in my world. She is completely dead to me” dad said I didn’t fully believe him that he doesn’t love mom anymore.
A few tears slipped my eyes. “No matter how sappy it may sound. I want you to find love again. Because you deserve it.” I say to him, but he didn’t say anything.
I wanted for my dad to find a women, because my dad was good looking man and I want for him to grow old happy. Me and Cameron won’t be with him forever. When Cameron goes to collage, dad will be all alone. He will go crazy alone.
“I don’t wanna talk about my love life” my dad shook me jokingly “tell me about your love life”
I lifted my head up from his shoulder “I don’t want to talk about it either” I answer laughing “and besides there is no love life” I didn’t want to tell my dad about Liam because it was too complicated at the time.
“There better not be” he warned me. And all though my dad wasn’t strict and let me do whatever. If I brought any boy home, I would just pray to god that that boy wouldn’t run away. Because my dad would question the shit out of him.
After my conversation with dad I went to bed early, but I couldn’t get myself to sleep because I kept thinking about Liam. Was he mad at me? I really didn’t understand why did he block me. ‘Why was this guy thing so complicated... ’ I thought holding in my hands necklace that Liam gifted me.
Boy I didn’t even know the half of it...
The next day I didn’t go to the maple three like always. because I needed to speak with Liam and I had Biology with him so I went there earlier to maybe talk with him before class starts.
I was waiting for him and thinking ‘what would I even say’ should I apologize to him? But for what? What if he just didn’t like what he saw...
I waited until the bell rang and he still wasn’t here. His seat in the back of the class was empty but his friends were here so he couldn’t be skipping class. He skipped classes only with his friends, never alone. Yes. I have noticed a lot of things about him. Like that on Wednesdays he always eats at a burger place and that his favorite clothing piece is his brown jacket. Liking someone from afar is extremely heartbreaking, but I never knew that it would feel better than having him.
I waited till the class was over and he still didn’t show up. So as soon as bell rang I went to talk to Liam’s friend Sebastian. I have never actually talked to him, but why not just ask him.
I walk up to him as he exits the classroom “hey Sebastian. I was wondering if maybe you knew where Liam is?” I ask him and he looked at me with raised eyebrow and forcing a laugh not to come out. What did I do again...
“Darling. He’s not at school today. But he will probably be trilled that you are looking for him. But i heard you two had a date yesterday, i hope you two had fun. ” he said and laughed it off while walking away.
What was that supposed to mean.
There was no way that Liam told him... Liam isn’t like that...
I didn’t have time to even process what he said when Nora spoke from behind me. “Hey girl” she said and gave me a tight hug. ” I probably know your answer but, we are going to movies tonight. Wanna join?” She asked me.
“Not really” I answer and she sighted dropping her head. “Okay, at least i tried. Any ways what’s up?”
“Nothing. ” I ask. “How are you doing Nora?” I ask her and she instantly knows I am talking about Alex. ” it’s not something I wanna talk about. At least Alex got away with detention for a week unlike Aaron.” She said like praising Alex.
I stopped her “wait. What did Aaron get?” I ask curious.
“Suspension for a week. And honestly he deserved it. He did a huge damage on Alex face, I was over at Alex house. And Aaron is a huge asshole.” She said that and it made my blood boil.
“You were at that bastards house?” I ask her recalling what I called Alex yesterday.
I could see that Nora already looked furious “how did you call my boyfriend?”
I ignore her question “Nora! Alex almost hit me.” I say shocked at how Nora is acting.
“But he didn’t” Nora spats at me.
“Yea because Aaron stopped him.” I defended Aaron. I now I realized that he saved me. Yesterday and I didn’t even say thank you. He was suspended because of me. Now he will hate me even more. ” I could be now walking around with bruise on my face it it wasn’t for him. And now Aaron has a suspension because he defended me. ” I spat back. Trying to sound as calm as possible. “Why are you defending Alex and why are you doing that to yourself. You know that he is sick in his head.”
“You don’t know anything. It wasn’t Alex’s fault and If you would have shut your mouth yesterday this conversation wouldn’t have been happening right now” She said to me. Me and Nora never fought. But this has gotten too far now. And it kind of makes up for all the times we didn’t fight or argue.
Now tears were starting to form in my eyes. “I defended you yesterday, but you can’t do the same back. At least admit that Alex was wrong in this situation. Alex is only hurting you. That is not love Nora” I didn’t know what else to say and I just walked away with tears falling down my cheeks.
I walked out of school as fast as possible, I just needed some air, some place so I can be alone. And that place happened to be the maple tree. I knew that none of my friend would come here because we only hang out there in the mornings or after school.
I didn’t know what to do so I just calmed myself down slowly breathing in and out.
Okay Tori, Nora is your friend. Right? You don’t want to lose her. So go and apologize.
Since my sister left I promised myself that I would do anything to not let anyone walk out of my life again. So I need to apologize even if I don’t believe in that apology. I can’t lose Nora.
But instead of talking to her I just texted her I can’t face her right now.
I skipped one lesson and lunch because I really didn’t feel like dealing with people, I just sat there with earphones in and music blaring so loud I almost thought my eardrums were about to pop. But its not like I turned the music down. I just kept it going, secretly hoping that music will sweep me up and take to a place where I can feel like I deserve to be there. Because right now I didn’t feel like it. Now that I think of it. I don’t think I ever felt like I deserve to be here.
Here in a sense of. Here in the universe. Here with other people. Here...alive...
I walked back to school but as I was walking to my next class. My science teacher Ms. Evergreen stopped me, yup the science was the lesson I skipped.
“Victoria, would you mind helping me?” She asked me. Ms. Evergreen was one of the nice teachers, she was I think in her sixty’s. She was equally nice to everyone and never had a favorite students.
Helping her? I thought she would scold me for skipping. Did she even notice?
“Am. No. not at all.” I reply regretting. But how can I say no to a teacher.
“I forgot to give this to Greg. Can you give it to him, I’m kind of in a rush right now. And I just forgot to give it to him.” She explained handing me a folder.
“What is it?” I ask curious. Its not like its not aloud to question teachers.
“It’s worksheets for Aaron Jones. Since he is suspended I put there some works for him to learn at home and so did few other teachers. I just chose Greg to bring him them.“.
I thought for a moment. Was I actually going to do this? Please don’t say this “I can bring them to Aaron” the words escape my mouth like with the mind of their own. I volunteer for the hunger games. And I will probably die first.
“Oh that’s even better. Thank you Victoria. But are you sure?” She asked.
“Um... yea I am going to that direction after school anyways.” I lie, I don’t even know what direction.
“Well then. Thank you again” She walked away but when she was already gone I realized that I didn’t even know where he lived.
Well I can always ask Riley. She will probably know.
The major reason why I said I would do it is because I feel like I need to say thank you to him for defending me from Alex. If he wouldn’t be there I would have gotten a hit.
As time went by I was starting to regret my decision even more. He must be mad at me. He already doesn’t like me. And now it is my fault he’s in trouble.
What if he regrets defending me?...