Twisted Thomas

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#4 Hot gay threesome


“Come on, hot stuff, hit me!” Dylan is grinning at me, holding up his boxing gloves to protect his face. He’s always acts like he’s the man, even though I’m a way better boxer than he is, and he can’t even begin to compare himself to me when it comes to muscles.

When I hit him in the chest, he lowers his gloves, giving me a straight line to his cheek. I don’t hit him too hard, not wanting to bruise his pretty little face, but he still grunts like I’m trying to kill him.

“Not the face, man!” he complains, narrowing his brown eyes at me. His hair is falling into his eyes and sticking to his face, all sweaty. “I have a date tonight.”

“Chicks dig guys with black eyes,” I tease, hitting him in the stomach and kicking his legs out from under him. I put a foot on his chest and laugh at his sullen face staring up at me. “Do you give up?”

“Yeah, fine,” he says, grabbing my hand so I can pull him back up. “No fair, man. You work out almost every single day. I’m only in here like… once a week or so.”

“Not my fault you’re so lazy.”

We get out of the ring and throw our gloves in our lockers before heading to the weight room to pump some lead. Dylan isn’t scrawny, not by a long shot, but he’s not a muscular god or anything. Not that I think I’m a god, but I’ve been in here almost every single day the past couple of mouths, working out my frustrations over a certain cute girl with bright pink hair who I can’t seem to be able to get over. When my heart aches, I go to the gym and work out until my body aches. So… now my heart and my body ache. It’s not the best plan ever, but it does make me look fit.

“So, you going out with that Tessa girl again?” I ask Dylan while I spot him.

He grunts and lifts the weight. “Nah, wasn’t for me. Too clingy. I’m actually… I mean…” He falters, and I grab the weight before it can crush him. Obviously, something is on his mind, so I tell him to switch with me. I don’t truly need him to spot me, but it will give him a chance to gather his thoughts and tell me whatever is it that has him… blushing? Is my best friend seriously blushing? What is he? A 12-year-old girl?

“Okay, so, please don’t judge me,” Dylan starts, looking down at me with a nervous expression while I start my bench presses.

“Dude, when do I ever judge you?” I ask with a grunt. Sure, I tease him relentlessly, but he does the same to me. I wouldn’t truly judge him. He’s been my best friend since we were 7. We own a tech company together, which means we work together every single day. I’ve seen him drunk, heartbroken, stoned, happy, and everything in between. There’s no judgement when it comes to me and Dylan.

“Okay, so… I’ve got a date.”

“So you mentioned.”

“His name is Bradly.”

Oh wow. I wasn’t expecting that. I know I need to say something, but I’m not sure what the right response is. I’m not even sure what this means.

“You’re into guys?” I ask stupidly, cursing myself. “Not that I care. I mean, of course I care, but I don’t mind. Not that there is a reason I should mind, or that you even care if I mind, but-”

“Chill, I get what you mean,” Dylan assures me, his skin still flushed.

I sit up and put down the weight, shifting so I can look at Dylan properly. “Bradly, huh?”

Dylan shrugs. “It’s a shitty name, but he’s really hot.”

“When did you…?”

“When did I realize I’m into guys?” Dylan takes a moment to contemplate that. “I think I’ve always known, in a way. And this doesn’t mean I don’t still like girls. I think I just… swing both ways.”

“Oh,” I say stupidly. “Sorry man, I’m not reacting to this well at all, am I? Just in case it wasn’t clear: I honestly don’t give a fuck if you mess around with girls or guys, or both. All I care about-”

“Oh God, Thom, if you tell me that all you care about is that I’m happy, I will fucking end you,” Dylan warns, giving me a hard shove that almost causes me to fall off the bench. “We’re not little girls!”

“Hey, you’re the one blushing like one!”

We grin at each other, and I can tell that even though I was a stammering idiot just now, he doesn’t care. He knows that I don’t see him any differently because of this. He’s still stupid dipshit Dylan, my best friend and business partner.

“Is it your first date with a guy?” I ask, wondering how long he’s been keeping this from me.

“Yeah,” he confirms, easing my mind a little. I’d hate it if he’d been walking around with this huge secret for months. “I kissed a few guys – well, you know, you were there. But never more than that. And I never dated anyone, not for real. It was always just drunken fun.”

He’s right, I did see him kiss a few guys back in college, but it was usually at one of the crazy parties we somehow always ended up at during the weekends, where everyone made out with everyone and you stumbled upon people having sex in every single room. I walked in on Dylan having a threesome with a guy and a girl once, but I never thought that it meant he liked guys as well as girls. Hell, even I kissed a guy once, on a dare. Doesn’t mean I like dick.

“Did something happen recently?” I ask him curious what made him decide to start dating guys. “Something that made you decide to try?”

“Yeah, Bradly,” he says with a grin. “We sat down on a couch in a coffee shop at the exact same time, with me sort of in his lap, and he spilled his coffee all over me. It was pretty funny, and we talked for a while, and then he asked me out, and I thought… well, why the fuck not, right? I’m 28 and single. If not now, then when?”

“True.” I pick up my weights again, ready to get back to my work-out.

“You’re not gonna ask me if I’m into you?” Dylan asks, looking amused and frightened at the same time.

“Are you?” I cock an eyebrow at him, the idea alone ridiculous to me. It didn’t even cross my mind to ask that. Sure, we’ve seen each other naked in the locker room at the gym, and we’ve slept in the same bed when we got way too drunk in college and we didn’t even remember whose room we were in, but nothing ever happened, and he’s… well, he’s Dylan. Just because he’s bisexual or pansexual or whatever the fuck it’s called, doesn’t mean he’s into every single guy he sees, right?

“I just figured every guy I come out to will ask me that, since men are so goddamn homophobic,” Dylan replies, looking a little relieved. “I know you’re not, but still… if you don’t want to change around me anymore or stop showering in the locker rooms together, that’s okay.”

“Dude!” I can’t even believe he’s saying this. “Don’t be weird. I’ve known you since we were 7. We measured each other’s dicks when we got our first erections, remember? I think it’s a bit late for modesty and privacy.”

Dylan looks at someone over my shoulder, and he laughs, causing me to glance back at well. Right behind me is Aston Johnson, one of the fitness instructors at this gym and a good friend of the girl I’m still head over heels for, even though I’m trying not to be.

“This is a nice place, guys,” Aston says with a wicked grin on his face. “Don’t whip out your dicks to measure them, please.” He cups his dick through his work-out pants, winking at me. “Besides, I’m bigger than both of you for sure.”

“I doubt that,” Dylan replies from behind me. “You’ve obviously never showered with us.”

“Oh my, Dylan, are you inviting me to a hot gay threesome?” Aston teases with another wink. “And here I was thinking you were straight as an arrow. If only I’d known this before I got engaged…”

Okay, I may be perfectly fine with Dylan dating guys, but this whole weird conversation is a bit much for me. Probably not even because it’s about a gay threesome, but because it’s Aston making the joke. He used to date my neighbor Francesca – or not so much date as fuck on a regular basis, I guess – and he broke her heart, leaving me to pick up the pieces. I did a damn good job, if I may say so myself. Not good enough, since she didn’t actually end up with me, but I tried. I really did.

Dylan and I work out for a while, and Aston gives us some pointers on our form. After half an hour, we hit the showers, and even though I can tell that Dylan is scared I will suddenly freak out about him seeing my dick, it’s doesn’t feel any different than it did before. When I’m toweling off, I decide to break the tension. Normally, he chats my ear off, but he’s quiet now, a little on edge.

“I’ve got a date as well,” I tell him.

“Franny?” he asks, sounding hopeful. He knows I’m head over heels for her, and he’s still rooting for me.

“Nah, she’s with Joshua now,” I grunt, pulling on my boxershorts.

“Didn’t she just break up with that police officer?” Dylan asks.

“Yeah, and we slept together after that, but she wasn’t ready for a relationship, or so she said. Guess it was just me she wasn’t ready for. She’s dating Joshua now. You know, the young blonde guy she’s always hanging out with?”

“Oh, yeah, I remember him. At least he’s a good guy. I never liked that James dude.”

I grin. “You only met him once in the hallway.”

“The cat didn’t like him.” Dylan is a big believer in animal instincts, and Franny’s cat General Fluffington hated Fran’s ex-boyfriend James fervently. “The General loves you, though, so that means something.”

“Yeah, it means I can babysit her cat all the time while she’s off sucking Joshua’s dick,” I grumble. I know I’m being a sad, petty little boy, but I don’t care. Only Dylan ever gets to see this side of me, and I need to blow off some steam. “The worst part is that Joshua is actually a decent guy. I like him. I can’t hate him. But I sort of do.”

“Of course you do, he’s dipping his dick in your girl,” Dylan says while he pulls his shirt on. “It would be weird if you didn’t want to kill the guy. Let’s get back to more pressing matters now… your date!”

“Right,” I realize. “She’s this blonde bombshell I met when The General got run over by that car. She’s quite… assertive.”

“Assertive?” Dylan asks, grinning. “Is that code for down to fuck?”

I shrug. “Maybe. I don’t know. She asked me out by text, and she’s been messaging me ever since, until I agreed on a date and a time. It’s a bit much, but I’m due for a rebound from Fran, so might as well get it out of the way.”

“Picture?” Dylan asks, holding up his hand.

I grab my phone from my locker and hand it to him. He unlocks the screen and goes straight to my texts with Tracy, opening her profile pic.

“Oh wow,” he says appreciatively. “Yeah, she’ll do.”

He’s right – she’s very hot. She didn’t do much for me when I met her a few weeks ago, but I was focused on The General then, and hurting over Fran and Joshua. Maybe I should give the girl a chance. Besides, it’s not like I’m looking for the love of my life right now. Why not have some fun with a hot blonde who seems to be pretty damn into me?

“Let me know how your date with Bradly went,” I tell Dylan when we both get on our mountain bikes outside of the gym.

He grins. “What are we? 12-year-old girls? I’m not gonna call you to gush over how he kissed me goodnight at the door.”

“Okay, then call me after he drilled your ass until you were bleeding all over the sheets.”

Dylan gives me a shove that almost has me face-planting into the pavement. “How about you do that to Tracy if you like the idea so much? Or let her go to town on your ass with a strap-on. You freak.”

We keep up the banter for a little while longer, but then it’s time to get back home. We agree to meet up in the morning for coffee at our favorite place close to my apartment to go over the plans we have for an app we’re developing. I have enough time to grab some dinner and change my outfit, and then it’s time for cocktails with Tracy. Let’s see where the night takes me.

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