The Awkward Boy's Crush (BoyxBoy)

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Chapter 16

(“I love it when the skies can’t sleep. I left a message encased in me. So bye, bye. A flawless ending. So beautiful... you’re so...“)

I’m so nervous right now. I’ve been thinking all day, and it’s already evening now. We’ll be with the guys so it’ll be alright, right? I don’t wanna be too conscious in front of him. He won’t notice, right?

There were still so many questions left unanswered. I’m sure I like him, right? It’s not like I have a lot of experience. But I don’t think you just start having dreams of your friend. And that too like the one I had. Right??

But I can’t just show it. I have to act normal, like I always do around him. I can’t risk this friendship. What if it’s just some infatuation which will go away in a month? Like sometimes, you watch a movie and are infatuated with the actor. It just goes away in like three months. Doesn’t a simple crush go away in three months or something? I think I read it somewhere.

But I know I don’t have these physical attraction stuff with people. Like if I wanted to like Kai like that, I’d have been obsessed since the day I saw him. I mean, look at him. And after thinking for so long, I know it’s not just some attraction. I think I genuinely like him. Even more than I liked Joe then. Spending this much time with him, listening to him, laughing with him; I get why I could like him.

But what if it’s that? That I needed someone close. That I’m projecting my insecurity and need that way. I had Books, yes. But Kai and I spend way too much time together. More than Books and I did at school. And I love it. What if it’s that? Nah... I wouldn’t have dreams of him like that right. That had never happened with Books nor will it ever. Eww. Can’t imagine. No. Nope.

Oh... I’ve been dreaming about Kai for a while now. It was always the moments I loved the most from the time I spend with him. Just the recent one was like a revelation.

I felt the temperature of face rise and a smile starting to creep in. I covered my mouth with my hand and rested my elbow on the window and focused on the outside through the window.

But the biggest fear is what if Kai can never see as more than a friend? I mean, he likes guys, yes. But that doesn’t mean he’ll like me. That made me frown a bit. He-

“What’s up with you? You’re not even singing along to the songs you played on speaker. It looks like something’s been on your mind since the morning.” My thoughts came to an abrupt halt because of my mom, sitting beside me and driving.

Mom glanced at me briefly and focused on the road. Since Duke’s place is far, she decided to drive me there.

“No, nothing. I was thinking of the games we’ll play while looking outside. How close are we?”

“Close. I think five more minutes... I’m so glad you made so many friends. You’ve never had a sleepover after 7th grade or was it 6th grade. Have fun.”

“Yeah, mom.”

We reached our destination after a few minutes.

“When will you come back tomorrow?”

“After breakfast, I guess. I’ll call. Bye.”


“Hey Marc.” Duke opened the door for me. “Right on time. Guys, Marc is here.” Duke announced my arrival to the others already there.

I greeted the others and took a seat on the couch. David offered me some soft drink. Felix, Ezra and Marvin were already there. Marvin and David were watching TV, and Felix was talking about some movie with Ezra. It’s usually me or Ezra he talks to about movies.

“Some people say the movie is messy. It’s not perfect, but I love the concept of an unreliable narrator in a movie. Like was he blind then? Did he kill the lady? The support cane he had had a hare carved on its handle, then he must’ve seen it was a hare.” Ezra nodded to it and I joined in on the conversation as well.

“Yeah, I think he lied to the girl in the end. I think he killed the lady. Because he’s not blind in the end. He’s faking it, again.” We laughed at that together.

“Movie nerds.”

“I think the word you’re looking for is a movie buff. And yes, that I am.” Felix gave a crisp reply to David which made us laugh. We can laugh at anything when we’re together.

The doorbell rang, and Duke went to the door. We went back to discussing the movie.

“Hey guys.”

The voice startled me and I spilled my drink a little. It belongs to Kai, of course. Kai’s just here and I’m already acting this way. Ezra passed some wet tissue wipes to me. I was busy wiping, and the others went back to whatever they were doing when Kai sat beside me with a cola can in his hand.

“Hey Marc. You alright?” He was smiling at me. There’s always an honest smile on those lips whenever he smiles.

My heart started thumping suddenly when I realised our proximity. His knee touching mine. I can feel his body heat through his thigh, almost touching mine.

“H-hey Kai. Yeah..” I smiled back at him.

He took a sip from the can and licked his lips a little. They looked wet, pink and soft. His lips have a natural pale pink shade. His upper lip is thinner than the bottom but not too thin, and the bottom lip looked soft and plush. He has such delicate lips.

No. Stop. Ugh, this won’t do.

I went back to wiping my pants. Suddenly, I felt Kai wiping a spot on my t-shirt. I could feel a loud thump in my chest, which almost made me dizzy. Nooo, please don’t do this!

“Hmm, it’s all right now.” He’s still smiling. Every time he smiles, I feel like a sharp arrow of feelings piercing through my heart.

“Yeah. Thanks.”

Lance, Liam, and Ryan soon joined us.

“So let’s watch a movie and order pizzas first.”

Everyone agreed enthusiastically.

So we watched a comedy movie and had pizzas. Honestly, I was more focused on the pizza.

Then we played UNO. Yeah, we still like it.

“Marvin, stop cheating. I saw you prompting Lance. Who cheats in UNO?”

“You saw wrong then.”

“We literally made eye contact while you were prompting Lance.” Felix said with a deadpan look.

“No, we didn’t.”

Yeah, that went on for a while. Duke won in the end, anyway.

And since there’s ten of us, we even played Among Us. Some of them have been obsessed with that game. No one was allowed to talk while playing.

“What?? Why’d you throw me out? I told you it’s not me. Are you all dumb?” David was frustrated and angry at us.

“You were really sus.” Lance just shrugged and focused on the game.

“I hope you get killed.” David sneered at him. Well, he is competitive.

“Have some cola.” Felix pushed a can towards him and focused on his phone.

“No one even cares. I hope you all die.”

Kai and Felix were the imposters, and yes, they killed all of us. They duped all of us in the chat by vouching for one another.

We also played dumb charade, Pictionary and truth and dare. We even danced a little.

“Okay, Lance, tell us the truth. It was you, wasn’t it?” Ryan asked.

“What? What’re you guys talking about?”

“So Marc, there was this incident a year ago. Jerkface Jack couldn’t play for the tryouts because his shoes were stolen. But the shoes were miraculously under his desk the next day. So the ‘shoe stealer’ was never found.” Liam explained everything to me.

“So he couldn’t make it to the team because he couldn’t play and you guys think Lance stole them? He could’ve talked to the coach, not a big deal.”

“Oh, he made it to the team. He doesn’t even need to play in the tryouts. He’s a good player, but he’s a jerk. Hence the name. He likes to play so he could show off in front of the juniors and intimidate them. He thinks he’s at the top of the pyramid. So it’s not a big deal, but doing it to him is.”

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure Jack bumped into Lance that day and spilled his juice and food. He didn’t even apologise. So I think it was Lance as well.” Ezra agreed too.

Others nodded and waited for Lance to answer.

He sighed, “Yes, it was me.”

Some clapped. Ryan was like ‘knew it’. Liam and Ryan high fived.

“But how did you keep it under the desk? They checked the early morning footage”, Ezra asked.

“Because I didn’t return it the next morning. I did it the same afternoon while everyone was leaving. They either didn’t check the afternoon footage or they couldn’t make it out with so many people.”

“That’s clever.”

“Oh... cool!”


Everyone cheered and clapped.

“To our shoe stealer and our hero.” Duke raised his can, and we all did the same.

Today is an opportunity to observe Marvin and Lance. I’m not letting it go. I have to be discreet and inconspicuous.

Marvin was looking at Lance with moony eyes all this time. Marvin also said ‘my hero’ for which Lance shoved his palm in Marvin’s face and pushed him away.

After a while, we decided to have dinner. Since we had pizza in the evening, we weren’t that hungry. We reheated pizza as late night dinner and had ice cream for dessert.

“Oh, I’m beat. Now let’s decide who’ll sleep where.” Duke was trying to stifle his yawn but failed. Few others yawned too.

Felix wanted the couch in the living room. Ezra and Liam are gonna sleep on the floor in the living room. Duke, David and Ryan will be in Duke’s room.

“So two of you can take the guest room and the other two, my brother’s room. I’ll go get the mattresses and pillows.”

Since Duke’s brother is in college, his room is unoccupied most of the time.

“Lance, let’s go.” Marvin was already taking Lance with him.

“Whatever, I just wanna sleep now.” Lance followed him obediently, yawning. Others were already readying their beds, all tired.


Then Kai and I will have to share a room. I can’t even say no. I mean, I don’t want to, but I hope I don’t make it weird. You get it, right? Like when you really want to do something, but you’re just as scared to do it. It must look obvious to the others, since we’re close, but my heart’s already pounding like the people banging on a door in horror movies. Yes, I give really weird analogies.

“Let’s go, Marc.” Kai said, yawning and stretching his arms.


Song used :

-So Beautiful by DPR Ian

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