Okay, so I’m the worse person in the world right now. It’s been a little over a month, and I find myself in Mr. James bed almost every night for the last month. I get out of his bed every morning. I go to work come home, shower. Head straight to the top floor. Where I have dinner and sex. The best sex I have ever had, I might add. I’m going straight to hell. Nolan still has talked about his fiancé with me. Actually, we don’t really talk about his life too much. The heat between us is so strong. That when I get a hair up my ass. He distracts me and I lose what I was thinking about.
It’s been a month and my feelings are starting to change for him. I need answers and I can’t wait anymore. I don’t know where he stands with me, but the sex is all we have together right now and I want more or I’m walking away. Who am I kidding? He is going to choose her. Ugh, I blame myself for this. I sat my things down on my counter. Normally I come home shower and head up, but tonight is going to be different. I pulled my phone out and sent him a text.
“Can you come to my place tonight? I need to talk to you.” I hit send and waited to hear from him. I sat my phone back down and went to start my shower. I came back out and picked my phone back up.
“Sure, is everything okay?”
“Yes, be here in twenty please.”
I set my phone back down and went and took my shower. Once out I put on a pair of shorts and a tee-shirt. I ordered some take out and took a seat. Waiting for Nolan to show up. It was well past thirty minutes and he still wasn’t here. Maybe he is just running late. I heard a knock on the door and it was just the food I ordered. I looked at my clock and it was almost an hour later. Do I text? Or go up to him? I sat the food on the counter and grabbed a hoodie. I headed up to his place to check on him. The elevator opened and I saw his door was cracked. That wasn’t like him and I thought maybe something was wrong.
I walked in quietly, his place was dark. I wanted to yell out for Nolan, but I chose against it. The killers might get me. Then I heard her voice. I heard her laugh. I moved closer to his bedroom and I opened the door. It was only his eyes that saw me. His eyes saw the tears in my eyes as he had her bent over his dresser. I took off running out of his place and I didn’t expect him to chase me. Once I made it back to my place. I was more upset with myself than I was with him. What did I expect, I knew what I was getting into and now I’m hurt. Exactly what I knew was going to happen. This thing whatever it was, was now over.
I was worried about what Juliet wanted to talk about. I knew what she wanted and I was just not in a position to tell her what was going on yet. If she knew everything. She would probably leave me anyway. I wasn’t proud of my choices in life, but we all have to make sacrifices. I started to leave to meet her and that’s when she walked in. Kimberly wasn’t supposed to be back in the city for another few weeks. I was still trying to figure out how to keep this thing between me a Juliet going. “Hi baby, I’ve missed you so much.” I have her a small smile.
“Your back early?”
“Yeah, things didn’t take as long as we thought, so I thought I’d surprise you.” She came up close to me and wrapped her arms around me. It’s not like I haven’t slept with Kimberly, but she wasn’t my type. All this was between her and I was an arrangement I Had no way out of, and the shitty thing was even Kimberly had no idea the arrangement was even in place. If anyone found out about Juliet. I would lose everything. Kimberly placed her lips on mine and at that moment Juliets face came to my mind. I felt like I was cheating on her. I knew why Kimberly wanted and as I grabbed her face and turned her around. I realized I was late to see Juliet. I needed to make this fast. I was about to take her from behind when my eyes met Juliet‘s. The look on her face killed me. Then she ran. Kimberly hadn’t seen her. I moved away from Kim. I hadn’t even done anything yet, but I knew Juliet knew better. I just sighed. “What’s going on baby, didn’t you miss me?”
“I’ve been working a lot. I’m just tired.” She smiled at me and pulled me over to the bed.
“Then let me make you feel better.” I push aside her and walked into the bathroom. I closed the door and locked it. I pulled my phone out.
“Please Juliet, give me a chance to explain.” I hit send and waited, but I got nothing.
Of course, I was crying. I knew this would only end badly for me. I did this to myself. This was my fault and I couldn’t blame him. My phone went off and I pulled it up to see his text. I just threw my phone across my apartment. I got my pathetic self off the floor and went into my bedroom. I turned off my lights and crawled into my bed. I was so happy I didn’t have to get up in the morning. I was just going to lock myself in my bedroom for the next two days and forget about everyone.
Sunday, I had stayed true to my words. I was still in my bed and even Willy was trying to get my attention. Nolan had text and tried to call a bunch of times, but I ignored them all. It was around eleven and I went to the fridge to find some food. I really needed to go shopping. I had been earring at Nolan’s that there was no food in my place. I called and ordered some take out. Then I heard a knock at my door. I went to check the peephole. “Girl, I know your in there. I will knock all day so you should just let me in.” Damn it, I said to myself. I opened my door and walked away from it. “Damn Juliet, you look like shit.”
“Thanks, Willy,” I said tossing myself on the couch.
“What happened? Kimberly came back and fucked everything up?” I grabbed my nearest weapon, which turned out to be nothing more than a deadly couch pillow and threw it at him. “Come on girl, you knew this was going to happen.”
“Your right, I did. I just didn’t think it was going to hurt this bad.”
“Did we catch feelings?” I just sighed and smashed my face into the couch pillows.
“I hate me right now.” Willy took a seat at the bar as my food showed up. Willy took care of it and set it down on my counter. Willy just helped himself to it. “Maybe I should find a different place to live?”
“Oh no, you don’t. Your the best person here. He only stays a year and he has been here for almost seven months. You can do this girl. Just stay away now.” I sighed and got up and went to my food. Even though I felt broken. I was still hungry. I shared my food with Willy and told him what had happened. “That sucks, I mean regardless if he had a fiancé and was still cheating. It sucks to actually see that.”
“You’re telling me. I’m not even mad at him.” Willy looked up at me. “Why should I be? I knew what I was getting into. I knew he is engaged. This is my fault.”