SHARING OF THE MEMORIES
Angelina was at her father’s villa. She was having her breakfast when a woman came to her and stood beside her at the dining table. She was young and beautiful.
“Angelina, I want to take you somewhere. Please, come with me,” the woman said while smiling. But the smile never reached her eyes. Her eyes held many indescribable emotions when she looked at Angelina in her eyes.
Angelina nodded her head and followed that woman outside the villa. She was curious where that woman wanted to take her. She walked side by side with the woman, occasionally glancing at her. The woman never glanced at Angelina and walked forward in a robotic manner with a high speed, making it difficult for Angelina to be at the same pace as hers. They sat in a car and drove away from the villa.
After an hour, they reached the outskirts of the city. Both Angelina and the woman stepped out of the car. The car had stopped near the woods. Just a few steps more, and they could enter the woods. Angelina got an uneasy feeling, as if many wolves were gazing at her hungrily from the shadows, waiting for the right time to strike on their prey. She looked around herself, but found nothing.
The woman entered the woods with Angelina following her like a lost puppy. “Where are we going?” Angelina asked while clenching her fists in nervousness and looking at the woman expectantly.
“You will know soon, darling. Just follow me.”
Angelina nodded her head and followed that woman, trusting her completely. Suddenly, around six men came in front of them, stopping them in their track. They looked rugged and dangerous, being tall and heavily built.
Angelina looked blankly at those men, not knowing who they were or from where they came. She noticed the woman whispering something and listening back through her earbuds.
The woman nodded her head at those men and turned around to go back. Angelina tried to follow her but was held back by those men holding her arms in a tight grip. She looked confusingly at those men and then at the woman.
“Where are you going? Take me back with you,” Angelina shouted at the woman.
She was definitely not getting the right vibes from those men. She was utterly terrified, fear stricken, and not knowing what to do. The woman never glanced back and just went back through the way they both came from earlier, leaving Angelina with those men.
The men laughed and dragged her more inside the woods. “She is going to her home, cupcake. You are not going back with her. She has sold you off to us. Your work is to pleasure us from now on,” one of them said with a crooked smile on his face and lust clearly visible in his eyes.
“What the hell are you talking about? Leave me. I said leave me,” Angelina shouted at those men while struggling. She kneed one man where the sun doesn’t shine and elbowed the one holding her.
The men cursed and slapped her harshly. A bruise formed on her delicate face. They laid Angelina down on the ground of the forest and started to touch her. Those men were stronger as compared to Angelina for her to fight them all off.
Angelina shouted for help and cried. She was afraid. Afraid of whether she could survive this. She was scared. Scared of what might happen to her now. She was terrified. Terrified of what disgusting things those men might do to her body.
“No one will be able to hear you, cupcake. Don’t scream now. Scream for us when we pleasure you, cupcake,” one man said while grinning, displaying his yellow and decayed teeth to her.
Angelina felt disgusted as those men touched her at her private body parts. She felt violated as those men came into her personal space. And she felt helpless as she had no control over the situation. Tears flowed from her eyes like a waterfall. Never in her dreams had she thought that would she be on the verge of getting raped.
The men were touching every part of her body with their dirty and disgusting hands. Her arms, her calves, her thighs, her stomach, her butt, her vagina, her chest, everything; none of her body parts were left untouched.
Angelina’s throat was throbbing with pain because of her loud screams. Her tears seemed endless. The men ripped off her clothes and proceeded to tear her underwear and every piece of clothing she had on her body. She was naked as the day she was born, lying on the ground of the forest.
Angelina was shivering uncontrollably. Her white porcelain skin now had many bruises and cuts because of the men’s tight grip on her and the small branches and twigs that were piercing her soft skin. Suddenly, she noticed one man who seemed to be the leader of the gang opening the buttons of his trousers and dropping it on the ground. The man stripped off from his boxers and climbed over Angelina.
Angelina started kicking her legs more fiercely, but the man just punched her in her face and held her more tightly. She closed her eyes in disgust and shame, feeling defeated and useless.
Just as the man was going to enter her, a loud gunshot was heard. Angelina’s eyes snapped open, and she looked at the man who was above her just a few seconds ago lying beside her, dead and motionless with a bullet in his head.
She looked in the direction from where the sound of a gunshot came and saw her dad looking furious and his face red with anger. The veins in his neck were visible and his fists clenched tightly beside him. Beside him were his bodyguards. One of his bodyguards had killed that man who was about to rape Angelina.
Angelina laid motionless on the ground. Her Dad saw her and his eyes immediately filled with tears. He rushed towards her and took off his coat to cover her with it. Angelina didn’t know what she was feeling. She looked blankly at his dad.
“I-I am sorry, baby. I am sorry that you had to go through this terrible experience. I am sorry that I couldn’t protect you properly,” her dad said while crying.
Hearing her dad’s voice, Angelina came to her senses. She looked at him with many emotions in her eyes. Then, she hugged him tightly and started bawling. The cry was filled with fear, sorrow, agony, anguish, hurt and betrayal. She cried for no one knew how long, letting out all the emotions she felt.
Xavier had gotten to know from his secretory, Louis that Angelina had come to the headquarters and was tensed for finding a man. He directly went to the headquarters and into Angelina’s office.
As he went near the couch placed at the corner of the room, he saw Angelina sleeping. But what caught his attention were Angelina’s shivering and the tears flowing through her eyes. She was mumbling something in her sleep.
Xavier could only catch a few words, “why did…. betray…. mother…. was going….. Raped…. I love…. dad….”
He was confused about what was happening. What kind of nightmare she was having? He kneeled down beside her and shook Angelina gently. “Don’t cry, Angel. I am here. Nothing will happen to you. Everything is fine. Wake up, Angel. You are dreaming. It’s not real,” he said in a comforting voice.
Angelina woke up with a jerk and looked around herself. She was sweating heavily despite the air conditioner working well and was shivering uncontrollably. Her breathing was abnormal and her heartbeat was fast. She was having a panic attack.
When Xavier noticed that Angelina’s condition was worsening, he sat beside her and spoke softly, “Angel? Angel, look at me, baby. It was just a dream. It was not real.” He didn’t touch Angelina, not wanting to startle her or scare her.
“IT WAS NOT A DREAM, XAVIER. IT WAS REAL. EVERYTHING WAS REAL. THAT DAY IS ENGRAVED IN MY MIND. YOU WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND, XAVIER,” Angelina shouted.
“Calm down, baby. It’s fine. You are not there now. You are with me; in your office room. I will let no one harm you,” Xavier said while trying to calm Angelina.
“Nothing is fine, Xavier. My body will always remain dirty and disgusting. They were going to rape me. They… They…”
Xavier stiffened as soon as he heard Angelina. His eyes turned cold and his aura turned murderous. “Who were going to rape you, Angel?” he asked in a low voice.
Angelina’s eyes leaked silent tears as she hyperventilated. “Th-those six men. M-My mother had sold me off to those men when I-I was just 12 years old. Th-they were going to ra-rape me. They were touching me and tearing my clothes. I-I was scared, Xavier…..” Angelina recited everything that happened that day to Xavier. She told from every minor detail of that incident to everything about how she felt that time.
Xavier was fuming but, he controlled his anger as he wanted to be there for his Angel to support her and to listen to everything she was telling him without interrupting her. He wanted Angelina to tell him about all her problems, nightmares, her past and everything about her.
As Angelina continued talking, she felt light, as if a burden was lifted off from her shoulders. Talking to another human and sharing her feelings with them worked as a therapy for her. It was the first time; she was talking about that day to anyone. She never talked about how she felt about that incident to her dad or to anyone she was ever close to. She was suffering and fighting from her nightmares alone.
“After my dad rescued me from there, he told me that my mom had asked those men to rape me and then kill me. I trusted her completely and that’s why went into the woods with her. After all, which child doesn’t trust her birth mother? My dad had gone on a business trip and she thought that was a good time to get rid of me. But she didn’t expect my dad to come early from the business trip.
She hates me from the day I was born. I don’t even know why she hates so much. When I was a child, I would always crave for her love and attention. But she would just ignore me or would verbally abuse me. My dad always fought with her because of that.
All the people around me used to say that my dad loved my mom very much. Heck, I think he still does. But that woman never loved my dad, and she was with him only because of money. People used to say that she even cheated on my dad many a time. But my dad always used to forgive her and accept her back. Do you know why? Because he fucking loved her.” Angelina chuckled humorlessly and shook her head.
“Love. What an interesting word, right? What can a person not do for love? He can cry, he can beg, he can kill and what not. Love only makes a person do stupid things. It makes a person weak and helpless. People say that it’s a beautiful feeling, but in reality what does it bring? P.A.I.N. Only pain. That four lettered word L.O.V.E destroys a person in the most ruthless way. What does even a person gets in the end when he is in love? Only betrayal. One’s biggest enemy is love. I JUST HATE THIS WORD. I JUST HATE IT.
What did my father get when he loved my mother? HURT, BETRAYAL, PAIN, SLEEPLESS AND TEAR FILLED NIGHTS. He couldn’t be happy again as before. He lost his genuine smiles, his humor filled laughs and the shine in his eyes. The only thing left were memories. Memories of how she cheated on my dad, memories of how she hated their own child, memories of how she broke a once happy family, memories of how she wanted to kill their child and memories of how she left my dad.” Angelina said with tears in her eyes. She closed her eyes to calm her emotions.
Xavier looked at Angelina with pain in his eyes. He didn’t want his Angel to hate the word love. He wanted to show her that love does not always bring pain in one’s life. What matters is the person whom one loves. If one has chosen the right person to love, then love would only bring happiness in their lives.
Angelina continued talking, “After that incident, my dad divorced my mom. He loved her but, he couldn’t bear to see his own child suffer from such an incident again. He gave half of his property to her and begged her to never come again in his daughter’s life. And you know, what she did? She left without any explanation or justification from her side. Her eyes held no emotions when she left him. It was as if she was waiting for that exact moment for years. I had seen my dad crying in his room for countless nights and drinking himself to oblivion after his divorce.
But, one day, I had enough. I couldn’t see him destroying himself anymore. When I asked him to promise me he would stop being a drunken mess because of that woman, he left alcohol altogether. He started going to therapies to make himself like before, a happy and childish person. Slowly and slowly, we made our own small and a happy family of two. Our small universe in which only me and him existed.
But now she is back. Even though I appear strong and emotionless in front of her, I am weak and broken from inside when I see her. I don’t have enough courage to stand in front of her without being affected by her. She controls a part of me even now. She is… still my mother.”
Angelina choked because of her sobs and leaned her head on Xavier’s shoulder in exhaustion. Recalling and talking about her past had drained her emotionally. Xavier stroked her hair and kissed her forehead.
“Devin Rossi is my dad, Xavier. He is everything for me. I can’t lose him at any cost. He is my only family.”
“Don’t worry, Angel. We will find him soon. I am always here for you,” Xavier said while lovingly gazing at his Angel.
She removed her head from his shoulder and looked into his eyes. “Don’t you feel disgusted by me? That I have such a broken family. That not even my mother loves me. That I have been touched by many men,” Angelina said while tears falling from her eyes.
Xavier wiped her tears and said, “Why would I feel disgusted by you, Angel? You have done nothing wrong. It’s not your fault that those men tried to rape you. If they would have been alive, then I would have given them a very painful death myself. And it’s also not your fault that your mother is a selfish bitch.” He again kept his Angel’s head on his shoulder. He wanted her to lean on him whenever she needed or wanted.
Xavier then added, “And if you think I am saying this out of pity, then you are wrong, Angel.”
Angelina hummed and said nothing. That one sentence was enough to calm her insecurities. She breathed in his natural musky smell mixed with Ocean’s fragrance, which strangely comforted her and kept her heart and mind at peace. They sat there for minutes staring off into the space.
Xavier looked at his Angel and saw her sleeping peacefully on his shoulder. He kissed her forehead and sat more comfortably, shifting Angelina gently so that her head was kept on his lap.
Thank you for trusting me enough to tell me one of your darkest memories of your past, Angel. I promise, I will always protect you and will fill your life with many happy memories to replace those terrible memories.