My mind seems to drift back to you ignoring the cold floor meeting my bleeding back. I giggle despite myself , how is it that even in my final moments all I see, all I know is you. Closing my eyes imagining the expression on your face if you knew what situation I had managed to get myself into. The furrowed brows and a slight snarl but anxious and scared eyes that’s what you would look like if you knew. Deep inside I wish you never find out what has happened what will happen now that I’ve been captured perhaps then you’ll move on faster thinking that I simply abandoned you. The thought alone that you may move on makes my heart ache but I know that you will need to move on. Nothing good has come of us being together so I can only pray that what you felt was more superficial than my own feelings for you. As mush as it pains me to think about it I can only hope that you find someone else and love them more than you could have ever imagined. I pray that they are living a normal simple life so that you may be with them without the worry of losing them to soon. The rational side of me wishes this all and more for you but even still I can’t stop myself from wishing that I was truly your one and only love that you will spend every aching moment since my disappearance torn apart wishing that I would simply return to your side. I know its selfish of me but won’t you mourn for me my love? Hurt because I am gone because now I know that I will not make my way out of this. A chocked laugh leaves my body as the boat rocks sending me rolling into a crate. I had fooled myself into thinking that we would get our happy ending that all my problems would stay behind me that they would never seek me out. In my foolish dream I had let my guard down and now it was far to late.I truly have made it to my end.