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Chapter 5

Lila's anxiety skyrocketed until there was a loud pop and she felt a cold surface beneath her skin.

She looked up to find she was in a massive dark room. Windows ran all the way to the end, each from the floor to the ceiling, sunlight streaming into the room.

It was empty with a giant chandelier hanging in the center from the center.

Lila stood up and walked toward the middle to better look at the chandelier.

It was just like all the others in Azrael’s place, but this glittered like jewels in the sunlight from outside.

One end was a massive wide staircase that led up to a second floor and on the other end was a large door, probably leading to the hallway.

Somehow, she had transported herself to another area of the house, away from him, and she hadn’t answered his question. She didn’t know the answer and she feared she would answer wrong.

Lila didn’t want to owe him anything, but she felt like once she left, she would truly be alone. Everyone from her old life thought she was dead and popping in on them would make it hard. It would also create problems and she knew that.

Azrael was the only person she knew. Without him she feared that loneliness would consume her.

She knew he was dangerous and could hurt her if he wanted to. In that bedroom he had scared her.

Lila hated feeling like she was trapped, and he had talked to her like she was an asshole for declining his help.

She sighed as she turned in a circle, taking in the scope of the room.

It was only a matter of time before he found her, and she wanted to not be near him.

He was hot as sin but was one scary dude who wasn’t a people person.

The door to the room flew open with a loud crash and Azrael appeared in the doorway breathing rapidly. His face was blank like earlier and it was unnerving.

Lila had no way of knowing what was going through his head.

When he started to jog towards her, she rapidly stepped backwards, making her way towards the staircase.

She hated stairs, but in order to get away from him she had to bolt up them.

Lila would have to worry about her knees later, once she had found a good place to hide.

Never in her life had she run until then.

She turned heel quickly and took to the wind, reaching the stairs in seconds and flying up them.

Breathing through her nose, she raced up the stairs at top speed, her feet pounding against the steps. Once she reached the top she went through the doorway and found herself in a smaller room where there were objects covered in large white sheets.

Weaving in and out of the various objects she made her way to the back of the room where she came to a wall.

There was no door.

Lila smacked the wall desperately, trying to find a way to get out.

She could find none and came to the realization that she was trapped.

Her heart was racing too much for her to not notice that she hadn’t broken anything when she had run.

The moment Azrael stepped into the room; she could feel him. She could feel the hairs on her arms raise and she got goose bumps from the electricity in the room.

Lila dared not turn around for she feared what she would find. She wanted to go home. She didn’t need this guy’s help, no matter who he was.

He was gorgeous but she couldn’t let that cloud her judgment.

Screw being alone for the rest of eternity and who needed companionship because she sure didn’t. She had always been alone. She had no family. She was an orphan. She had two friends and that was it.

No one would remember her in a few years. She was nothing and her death meant nothing. She lived alone because she was an absolute emotional wreck from years and years of bullying that she couldn’t get past. She was still that monster that everyone had made fun of in high school.

Lila had lied to Azrael when she told him about her parents.

The orphanage had spent all that money so she could walk like a normal person.

She was wracked with emotion and couldn’t figure out why.

She tried to stamp it down but couldn’t and could feel the air in the room sizzle.

Lila was on the verge of collapsing into a puddle of tears in front of a possibly very pissed off god.

If he killed her again, so what?

Her death would mean nothing, and she would be gone for good. She didn’t want to be a goddess or even be alive.

Her life was over and done with. Her sad pathetic life was over. She had died with a broken soul that would never mend. She would never be normal or bring all her dreams to fulfillment. She was an ugly fucked up mess.

So deep was she in thought that she didn’t notice Azrael coming up behind her with his hand held out. She was rocked with involuntary spasms and silent tears streamed down her face as she sank slowly to her knees. She didn’t care what was going on around herself as she shut her eyes, completely losing control.

She had always kept her emotions in check but Azrael getting in her face and asking a question that was stupid to decline, she had snapped.

Lila had cracked and come apart.

For a second, before he came into the giant room, she had been alright but seeing him again and him coming had set her off.

In truth, Lila was a bottler and had zero self-esteem. She thought she was a weak person who barely kept it together. She had dreamed of getting her life together but being killed had cut her life short and thereby dashing all her hopes and dreams.

Even though she was a walking disaster, she had hoped to one day settle down, get married, have kids, and grow old with that person. She was scared of having kids for fear of giving them the same disease she had and having them bullied just like she had been.

When she died, she wasn’t ready yet. She was nowhere near close. Now, she had to deal with being a deity, with these powers that she had neither control of nor no complete knowledge of.

This wasn’t what she wanted in life and she was scared of the future.

Lila guessed all of the recent revelations had made her uncomfortable and scared. Just the thought of being near such a powerful god as Azrael filled her with dread. She had no idea if he was a good god or not.

What if he was the bad guy?

What would she do then?

Lila didn’t want to even know what that man could do. He was ancient and he could probably bend physics as life knew it and that scared her.

He scared her.

Beneath that perfect façade lurked a powerful creature of the cosmos.

She wrapped her arms around her body as she was wracked with uncontrollable spasms and tears that wouldn’t stop.

Lila was so far into the tsunami of her emotions that she didn’t know who was screaming at the top of their lungs with tears in their voice.

It was hers.

It was filled with so much pain; pain that she had always kept hidden deep within her soul.

Lila was completely falling apart.

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