Pretty Fake Fantasies

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The date

School went by in a blur, as always. I wonder if the universe is trying to get me to fail school...

I avoided Carter like my life depended on it. I hide in the girl's bathroom during lunch and did everything I could to avoid him in class. I even sat beside strangers whom I have never talked to just so Carter wouldn't be able to sit next to me.

Now I know you might be wondering "oh my god, Ava why are you being this way?"

Well if you haven't figured it out yet or have for some weird reason just joined in on the journey of my life, I'm a virgin. Not like I've never had sex virgin. I'm a virgin in the sense I've never even touched a boy before Carter Grey.

The kiss we had in the field was my first kiss ever, the date we'll have would be my first date ever. This was my first crush ever for god's sake, this was the first time someone has confessed to me!

So yea forgive me if I'm acting like an idiot but I do not know how to even stand near Carter without turning into a beetroot!!

Never in my 17 years of life did I ever imagine acting like this. I used to call girls stupid for fauning over guys and not focusing on school! But now I'm doing the same thing!!!

Oh my life has done a complete 360, hasn't it? Since my father left, it has all turned super duper delux normal mode hasn't it?

I know how to deal with being scared and sad and anxious. I know how to act when I have a shit father and a brother to take care off but I have no idea what I'm supposed to do now. I sometimes think maybe I'm being irresponsible, I just keep on waiting for things to go downhill.
I keep on thinking I'm being incompetent...

I let out another sigh.

"Ava what's wrong?" I heard Ray's voice which made me look at him. He was currently watching power rangers again while I was sitting on the sofa, reading a book.

"Nothing's wrong Ray." I said to him while keeping my book down. I was just bending it's spine for no reason, I hadn't even read a single line since I opened it.

"You keep on breathing so loudly, I thought you weren't getting enough air" my brother said while turning back to his show.

"Good job Ava! Even your 11 year old brother can sense your pathetic teenage meltdown" I hear my subconscious.

"Oh shut up! It's not a meltdown, I'm just assessing things" I said. I don't know why I was being so hard on myself. Can't I just let things be for once in my life? Do I always have to be so critical of everything?

'whatever, just let it be Ave and isn't it a good thing he likes you too? You deserve a break. You deserve all the things other kids have and that includes having a boyfriend and going on dates' I said to myself.

I used to think this was ridiculous but now I see it's not. People change their perspective of things all the time, I don't need to be set in my ways. Unless this doesn't affect any other shpere of my life, I should be alright.

I picked up my phone from the coffee table and checked the time.

"Come on Ray, time to go to the library" I told my brother while getting up from the sofa. I'll focus on work for now and deal with my thoughts later.

Ray and I hurried to the library. As usual we greeted Pramod and got to our individual duties. I went to the storage to find only a couple of boxes of books to put away. I was done within an hour but didn't want to head home since I knew all I would do is overthink things.

So I ended up helping Pramod out with his work. Soon Ray and I were heading home.
I still have to look for another part time job. Maybe I can do that tomorrow, this way I won't feel so... useless.

Before I knew it I was turning my wardrobe inside out looking for a dress. Why the fuck do I not have a single fucking dress?!?

I groaned for the millionth time. I looked at the time in my phone and I had 30 min to get ready. FUCK!

I ran down the stairs and straight to my mum.

"Ma, I have a favour to ask you" I told my mum. I was hoping that I wouldn't have to tell her about the date. I don't know how she'd react to it. My mum is cool regarding most things but I've never talked about guys with her so I was having second thoughts about mentioning this to her.

"Yea sweety, what's up?" She said as she looked up at me and smiled. She has a beautiful smile, I almost forgot how she looked like when she genuinely smiled, she rarely smiled when my father was around...

"Uhhh I- can I borrow a dress from you?" I asked her, my voice clearly showing how nervous I was. I need to be put in a mental hospital...

"Why do you want a dress? You always said they were stupid" my mother said chuckling.

"I have a date today" I told her while nervously playing with my fingers. Oh someone kill me right now.

"You have a date?With a person?" My mother asked with a look of utter shock on her face. Uh oh...I don't think that's a good sign...

"Uhhh yes I have a date..with a guy.. It's Carter Grey. You know him, he's the one who got injured and I used to visit in the hospital" I rushed. Would she not let me go? Is my mother that extreme?

"Oh sweety!!!" My mother lept out of her seat and rushed towards me which made me want to run back to my room cause she looked like a crazy lady but I held my ground. Soon I was enclosed in my mother's bear hug, she was squeezing me like a fucking lemon.

"Ma, you're killing me" I said making her aware of the fact that she was currently choking her daughter.

My comment made her release me.

"Oh I'm so happy! You have no idea how much I've wanted you to get out there and mingle with people and you're going on a date!! And of course you can borrow any dress you like. I actually have some dresses I used to wear when I was a little younger, they're in the attic, you go ahead and see what you like" she said and then patted me on my head lightly.

"I always felt so sad seeing how lonely you made yourself be Ava, I always thought If only I had a little courage you wouldn't have to skip on your childhood" she said to me while stroking my hair.

I smiled at her "ma, it was never your fault and I never missed out on anything, I have a wonderful mother and such a great brother. What else would I need?" I told her. She smiled at me and rushed me to go and get ready.

I checked her closet first but it had only suits and normal clothes, nothing I was interested in. So I made my way towards the attic.

It took me sometime to find the dresses but I spoted the box my mother had described to me and took it with me to my room.

I set it down on the ground and opened it. It was filled with all sorts of things. Medal, certificates, diaries, photo albums, Canvas, paints and clothes!

I pulled out a black dress, it was a slim fit and looked very elegant, it came down to my kness and a had a sort of a sweetheart neckline but the heart part was very subtle. I can pair it with one of my mum's silver pendent and some heels. This will do.

I wanted to look through the box but I decided I'd do it after I got back from my date. I closed the box and pushed it under my bed.

I got ready in record time and my mum helped me curl my hair. I borrowed a pair of black strapy heels from her and also a very beautiful tear drop shaped silver pendant.

"You look amazing darling but are you sure you haven't over done it? It looks too much for a date. I always wore jeans on dates" my mum said.

"Well Carter said he was taking me to some fancy restaurant, you think this would be too much?" I asked her having second thoughts about my dress choices.

"Well, if he told you where you were going then it's fine. I thought you assumed and just dressed blindly" my mum said.

The door bell rang at that very moment which made my heart jump. Fuck!

My mother squealed and practically teleported to the door. I picked up my purse, which I had also borrowed from my mother, and made my way towards the door.

"-nd if you hurt my daughter in any way I will throw you under a bus", I heard my mother say, holy fuck!

"Ma!" I scolded her, jeez Louise had she always been this violent!?

"Oh hush child. I've always wanted to say that when one my daughter's brought a guy home. Your sister disappointed but alas! You came through" my mother exaggerated. Why is she such a drama queen? Is she high?

"Carter let's just go before my mother goes full blown crazy lady on you" I said to Carter without really looking at him, grabbed his hand and pulled him outside.

A sleek black car, whoes model I did not know of but looked very expensive, was parked right outside my house.

"That's yours?" I asked Carter amazed at how rich this dude's parents were.

"Yes it is" he replied. I finally looked up at him and was left speechless. He was wearing a white dress shirt and black trousers. His hair weren't a messy like they always are and he was wearing some black dress shoes as well.

"Fuck me to hell" my subconscious was practically drooling and I think I might've been too.

"Are you checking me out Piers?" Carter asked with a smirk on his face. That made me snap out of whatever trance I was in.

"Pooff, me? Checking you out? Oh please" I said which made him chuckle.

"You clean up well Grey I admit that" I said.

"You look very preety as well Ava, I'm sorry I didn't say that earlier" he said while looking intently into my eyes. Wtf is happening? Carter seemed different today, not the usual casual, friendly guy.

"So where are we going" I asked as we both got into his very expensive car. I was scared I'd scratch it somewhere.

"We are going out to dinner and that's all I'm telling you" he said as he started the car.

"Wait are you allowed to drive? Do you have a license?" I asked Carter suddenly realising that he was the one driving the car.

"Well Ava I don't know if you've noticed but I also happens to ride a bike and people need a licence for that as well" he said which made me want to slap myself for being stupid.

Of course..

"Yea..I forgot" I said. God I was so nervous that my brain was turning to mush.

Soon we had been driving for around half an hour and I lost my patience for the 100th time.

"Are you taking me somewhere quite to murder me? Cause if you are then you should remember my mother's words. And also I would think really low of you for being so stupid to kidnap me and murder me AFTER my mother has seen me leave with you" I told him

"Oh believe me I won't murder you. I wouldn't want your annoying ass haunting me forever, now would I?" He replied cheekily.

"Then where are we going. My ass is numb from sitting in one position for so long" I whined again. I needed to be in motion all the time and this was getting boring.

"We're almost there. Just hold on a bit longer and you're welcome to sit on my lap if you're finding the seat uncomfortable" Carter remarked, a smirk obviously gracing his stupid face.

I went from human to Tomato in 0.02 secs.

I cleared my throat and looked outside the window. Geez something was wrong with Carter.

"Are you okay? You look a little red." Carter said chuckling.

"Oh shut up" I said.

Jesus how will I survive this date???

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