— missy —
call me when you’re sober
Don’t cry to me
If you love me
You would be here with me
You want me
Come find me
Make up your mind
Once I was a Missy. Invisible. Unseen. A Loser. But Gio came like a lightning that showed beam into my life. At a second, I was distinguished, I caught all their attention. But like a slap, I was awakening in the undying truth. I was changing. And I can’t find where Missy lies beneath the sophisticated Georgette.
I can’t imagine that even I got everything I wanted, I was left hanging. I never thought loving someone would end up losing all. And I have to choose. From the life I wanted or the Life I needed.
I was almost running thought the corridors. I’m late for my mathematics class—my favorite subject of all time. I love solving problems and that include numbers. Whenever I would look through it, I would see it as a challenge to face. It just makes me get excited to know the right answer to the questions.
“Oh my!” I turned 45 degrees to the left and fell flat on the floor. I’ve just been knocked out by a guy I don’t recognized, but when he saw I was the one he bumped into, He freaked out and chased for all the things that fell.
Of course, that was a big change. Before, if I would be in the same situation, I would just be left hanging. And they’ll go as if I wasn’t hurt or what so ever.
I was happily, getting my things when I turned my head at the left and found Gio at one corner. It stunned me. The time like stopped in my face. Gio is just with Stacy. They’re doing their thing.
“Ms. Georgette, are you okay?” I saw the guy standing in front of the shocked me. I stood up and smiled at him. I got my things but didn’t answer the question.
I’m aware that I’m the fifth girl friend.
But I wasn’t able to tell that guy I’m okay. ’Coz I’m not.
I was going around the library looking for a good literature book. My English professor said that my book report seems like a project of a third grader. What can I do? I never liked reading books and I was assigned to a six inches one. How can I read that in one week… and my schedule? Oh… please!
I saw the “Literature” sign at the upper corner of the library, s o I went there and looked for the thinnest book ever published. When I saw one, I pulled if off the shelf, and when I did, I saw a girl looking through books like I did. I guess she’s not seeing me.
“Hey, baby” A guy hugged her and she was bit shocked but gave a smile. I looked at them and remember Gio and me. How I miss Gio. But when I looked closely. Oh, please. Tell me I’m hallucinating.
I run out of the room. Gio was there.
I guess that girl was one of us.
Why am I feeling this way?
Josh? I was looking all over for him almost the entire day and when I saw him sitting on the spot we used to sit together, it uplifts me. I wanted to talk to him. I wanted to say sorry, so I hurriedly went there and sat beside him.
“Josh. Look, I’m s—”I saw interrupted when he stood up and walk away from me. I saw a scratch piece of paper he left there, I looked for him again. He was talking with Sheena. Yes, I know that lady, and her voice stinks. What the hell she’s trying to tell the best bud in the world I have?
I went through them putting the letter inside my pocket.
“Leave him alone, Sheena.” I told her when I hear she’s trying to say bad word in front of Josh. But Josh didn’t bother looking at me and went away.
“Bitc h,listen. I know you’re the new girl, but who cares? You’re not pretty. You’re not even as high as us. Sh*t. How lame Gio can be! You moron, get out of my face.”
She may not be with Gio at this moment.
But that girl. I heard so much from her.
I walked through the corridor to look for Josh; I know he won’t get somewhere far. But I stopped and walk back into the gym and sneaked in. I was Gio, lip-locking with Chelsea, the famous cheerleader.
When I was just fantasizing Gio, I always see him with that girl.
Kissing. Everywhere around the campus.
I’m Hurt. Badly.
Before I got into my senses, Gio pulled over the car to the near by Starbucks. I was thinking deeply, that I never did realize Gio was annoyed of my actions.
“What’s wrong?” He asked me, while I was looking so pale in front of him. I have to make something out as soon as possible. To prevent everything to hang up and be ruined. “Are you sick?”
“I guess I am.” My bag is placed on my lap, and underneath it is my two hands getting rid of the ring Gio gave me. I don’t know if what would I do is right, but all I know is, I’m sick.
“Okay. So, I’ll take you home.”
“Gio.” I looked at him and He was looking at me in worries. I slowly gave him the ring. And He was clueless as he ever been. He was looking straight to it. Maybe wondering what am I doing. “I’m sorry.” Tears came down.
“What’s wrong?” He holds my cheek. Everything is wrong. “I was spending the most time with you from all of them, even my gang. I gave you a ring, which I never gave anyone else. You’re my favorite girl.”
“I don’t care if you spend the most of your time with me, or even the ring. I don’t care if I’m your favorite girl. I wanted to be the only girl, Gio. I don’t want to be the fifth; I wanted to be the first. The only one.” I was crying so hard, this thing sucks. This is hurting me more.
“No. don’t dump me.”
“No. I’m just… just.” I stopped. Oh, I’m stupid. I’m dumping him. “I’m sorry, Gio.” My tears are uncontrollable. “It’s over.”
I went down the car pulled over a cab. Went in and left Gio. This fantasy is over. I must be awaken in the fact. To go back to the real world, the world I used to live in. I made the most incredible decision in my life. The one I knew I would regret all my life—discarding Gio Gantiqui.
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