After a while we finally pull away from each other. Sitting in his lap our faces un-tie from each other’s necks. Looking at each other he places a warming hand on my cheek, looking at me with so much closeness and admiration. I have never felt so close to a person then I have in this moment.
Running his fingers over my skin it warms my cold state and I feel full of so much inside. When i’m with Harry I can see clearly and i’m still trying to understand it. “I haven’t been hugged in a really long time.” his expression jumping through many emotions. My breath gets taken away and I have to remind myself to breathe. “me either. I think we both needed it though.” I say quietly.
I don’t like when Abby hugs me either. She tried once last year but it was really uncomfortable. I don’t do well with affection but right now it’s the best feeling in the world.
How can someone you barely know impact you so much?
Harry looks up at the stars then returns his gaze to mine. He looks so peaceful in this moment, “could you tell me more about the stars? I like hearing you talk.” rubbing his thumb up my cheek is just enough to make my knees buckle if I wasn’t sitting down. “I have to go back in and work Harry.” Sad that I have to leave our space to go back to reality.
“I don’t wanna go back in there.” I whisper, biting down on my lip. I’m afraid once I go back in there I’ll feel how I always do. Scared and misunderstood.
Harrys hands make there way behind my back, placing them flat down, holding me locked in. the warmth shatters through my shirt and heats up my insides.
“I’ll tell you more about my tattoos when you tell me more about the stars?” Harry negotiates. Untying my hands from his neck I place them on his shoulders. Harry’s response brings a warm smile to my lips.
No one has ever cared about what I have really ever had to say before. That’s why I don’t like telling anyone about anything, especially the stars. Anyone that I had ever trusted turns it around to stab me in the back.
“Deal.” I say cheeky.
I don’t want this moment to end. “I could stay here forever under the stars.”
“Do you have a ride home?” Harry asks while moving his hands to rest on both my hips. Shaking my head, “No I usually just take the bus home.” stating like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.
Harry’s brows grow tight together, “don’t your shifts end late?”
“Yeah around like three. Why?” Harry hands press into my hips, “you’re not taking the bus home at three in the morning Violet.” stating bleakly. Oh boy. I roll my eyes at him.
“Harry it’s just public transportation.” I laugh at his bewildered state.
“Uhh.” I lean back as his hands hold me up from completely falling. lacing his hand further in the middle of my back he pulls me back up to see his hard stare.
“Yeah and you’re an innocent woman, alone, in an unsafe part of town. It’s not safe Violet.” Harry has a huge point and I hate taking the bus home at night. I feel so uncomfortable and frightened but there is nothing I can do about it. “I have no other choice Harry.” I level myself up straight.
“Dont care im taking you home.” anxiety runs through me. Harry can’t take me home, no ones seen my home. I can’t let him. “No Harry I-” Stuttering, I try to get the words off my tongue coherently. “Niall and Louis.” Is all I make out squeezing my hands on top of his shoulder.
“They came in their own cars. I’ll wait till your shift is over then will go.” his voice stern and there’s no way i’m changing his mind.
“Violet what is it?” His face searching mine.
“You just can’t take me home.” I shake my head quickly but Harry stops the movement with his hands, placed on both my cheeks. “Why?” his face inches from mine.
“Could you maybe drop me off at the bottom of my street or something?” Harry looks at me like whatever I said was the most ridiculous thing in the world.
“You live on your own don’t you?” Harry adds questionably and I nod. His shoulders relax. “Then why can’t I bring you home Violet?” worried now takes over his expression like i’m hiding the biggest secret.
“Because.” Is all I cant get out. “Tell me.” his voice firm.
“I don’t let anyone see my house Harry.” I throw out rapidly. “No one. I just. I” Harrys hands slide to my chin, lifting it up and I gulp. “Is it because you’re ashamed of where you live?” All I do is nod into his grip and he frowns.
“Violet your home should be the last thing you’re embarrassed about. You left your parents to live in that apartment and it probably took everything inside of you to leave. You worked your ass off to afford it.”
I know I have been through so much and my tiny apartment should be the gold medal of my life but it’s always held me back. The walls that surround me only remind me of what I had left and the dreams never fail to leave me.
Realizing his total grip I just nod. “Okay.”
Rolling off of Harry hips I sit myself in front of him on the grass. Harry stands up first in one motion and reaches down a hand which I willingly take. Lacing my hands through his, picking me up in one swoop, we both remain standing.
While I brush of my clothes Harry never moves a muscle to leave me out here. When I finish we both walk to the door. Harrys the first to grab ahold of the handle and opens it exposing the loud noises of voices and music to flood the quiet. Breathing in I leave the peace of the stars behind.
Walking through the door, Harry follows behind with a protective hand resting on my back as we follow through.
“I’ll sit myself at the bar when Niall and Louis leave.” he whispers in my ear from how loud the place is. Simply nodding he slowly removes his hand from my back until the last of his finger tips touch the air. Walking away Harry returns to his table as I walk around starting to make more rounds at new tables.
It’s around three in the morning now and I finally finish up for the night. Harry, like he promised, had been sitting at the bar all night waiting for me. When I got a spare chance we bantered across the bar or I sat beside him talking about random things. a few childish remarks fell from his lips which made me slap my mouth hiding giggles of laughter and jaw dropping surprise .
Leaving the locker room I’m in now, I walk to the bar seeing Harry already standing with his keys in hand. “Ready?” he dangles it infront of him.
“Yeah.” I brush my hand over my bare arms from the draft.
“Where’s your sweater?” Harry asks like a grandma. “I didn’t bring one.” I laugh from his tiny outburst. Not expecting what Harry does next he unzips his black hoodie so he’s now remained in a black buttoned shirt. Bunching it up he reaches it out in front of me. huh.
“You’re going to get cold.” He explains from my lack of receiving.
“Just take it.” he inches it forward again shaking it. Accepting my fate I take the black piece of clothing from his hands and throw it over my shoulders. The sweaters completely too large for me but it’s so warm and cozy inside. Zipping it up all the way the smell of vanilla hits my senses but I try not to inhale the scent. looking back up at Harry he’s smirking all over. “You look good in my sweater darling.” mhm.
“Harry, I’m swimming in it.” moving my hands in the air loosely, material flies all over. Giggling, Harry takes a step towards me, “no you look hot darling.” um... Harry.
Now infront of me, he reaches down pulling up the hood practically blinding me from the draping fabric. Harry laughs in front of me. I look like one of those Jedi’s from star wars. Pushing my way through the sweater I find my way to the light.
“Shut up smirky.” He’s lucky I’m cold. Harry’s lips pull together trying to hide his amazement.
Yawning I try to fight the anxiety growing in my stomach from having to sleep but with Harry with me I almost forgot about all my problems.
“You ready to go Darling?” Harrys smirk still prominent on his lips. Pushing against his chest playfully we start walking towards the exit.
At the door, Harry reaches over, pulling it open. “What a gentleman.” I sarcastically play out. The boy I met in math class definitely isn’t who I pictured to be standing beside me right now. I still know nothing about Harry but I know his heart is pure.
Following me outside I bring my arms to my chest from how cold the wind is. Looking back at Harry he nudges his head in the direction of his... motorcycle. “Um Harry.” A worried tone exhotes itself from me. I totally forgot this asshole rides a motorcycle.
Turning around he grins from my dismissal. “That’s a motorcycle.” I whisper, shout. hugging the vanilla fabric close to my body in protection from the object, giving me a shield.
“Yes it is.” He simply states climbing on to sit at the front. My eyes go wide at his arrogance. Finally meeting my stare he throws his head back. “Oh come here already.” his tone playful.
Standing still frozen with my jaw open, I walk like a sloth to him, hoping that in some way the tables will turn and I wont be getting on this motorcycle. Maybe it will turn into a pumpkin carriage or something. Literally anything but this.
“Oh God.” I moan and cringe my face to the side when I’m about an inch away. “It’s not going to burn you Violet.”
“You don’t know that.”
Finally reaching Harry’s proximity he tugs on my hands rushing me forward, so I’m standing between his legs. Harrys raises his brows in total excitement. “Wipe that grin off your face.” I muster out with a hard expression.
“Can’t help it.” he shakes his head hiding the unnecessary amusement he’s getting from watching me right now.
“You’re gonna have to give me directions you know.” He presses some button on his bike.
“You know the alley you found me in this week. Just go there, my apartments beside it.” I can’t believe Harry and I only started talking on Monday, it’s crazy. “Alright well, hop on darling.” Standing there in between Harry’s legs my eyes go wide. “Like right now?” I mumble in shock. “Mhm.” He hums.
Harry turns around suddenly and reaches down on his motorcycle where I can’t see. Pulling up Harry reveals a black helmet and a small smile of relief washes over me. “I mean if we crash this won’t help but whatever helps you sleep at night.” My face drops which only causes more of a reaction out of Harry.
“Im just kidding.” he throws his hands up but I only punch him in the arm. “That’s not nice.” I get that Harry loves thrill but it’s not my thing.
“You know last time you punched me, you blamed the weak hit on the alcohol... Don’t think it was the alcohol darling.”
Does he just want me to take the bus or something? “I could out fight you any day of the week prince charming.”
As soon as the words leave me lips Harry places the helmet on to my head without any notice. Being a little big for my head, it just slips on easily. “I’m sure you could.” this helmets not big enough for me not to be able to see the smirk radiating off his lips.
“Alright climb on.” i’m gonna be completely honest here when I tell you I don’t know how to do this. “How?” the sound echoes through the helmet bouncing around.
Harry grabs my waist which takes me off guard from the lack of vision, pulling me towards the back seat. “now straddle and climb on.”
climbing on I get myself situated on the back seat. “No seatbelts?” I ask giddy like the safety patrol. “Just me.” Harry’s hands lace under my knees pulling me forward in one movement so I fell into his back. With an inhale of a shriek my body hits his.
“Better hold on tight.” not giving my mind a chance to lecture Harry about going slow I wrap my arms around his waist tightly, locking my fingers.
I’m holding on for dear life and he hasn’t even started the bike yet. Resting my face on his back, my eyes shut close when he starts to rev the engine. “Go slow.” the words shoot out of me.
“No promises.” revving the engine with a loud boom I jump slightly.
Before I can even think Harry takes off, fast. Shooting out of the parking lot onto the empty street. running every red light as there’s no one in site. My breaths are taken away and I grip him even tighter, definitely leaving a mark. My thighs squeeze his sides determined that if my grip loosens I’ll fall.
Harry cheers in the wind as I’m practically dying back here. “Loosen up darling. Throw your hands up.” Is he serious? “No way in hell Harry.” I somehow muster the words that took all the strength to say.
His bike rushes through the streets going at laser speed. The wind jumbles my hair and freezes my body in coldness. I’m really happy right now that I’m swimming in Harry’s sweater. It’s much warmer this way. With the wind hitting the clothing forcefully I hide my face even harder in his back with the fabric covering my neck warmly.
To my surprise Harry actually slows down and goes to a complete stop at a red light this time. “you’re cutting off my circulation.” He beams having too much fun with this. asshole.
“If you think i’m loosening up you’re crazy. Go slower.” Harry just shakes his head, “where’s the fun in that.” I try to speak but my voice is cut off once again by Harry throttling in full speed.
After what seems like five minutes my body gets used to the raging feeling of death and I almost feel free. The fear feeling bottled up in my stomach starts to ease and turns into a huge thrill that makes me loosen my arms a little.
The ride from hell goes to a stop in front of the alleyway and I jump off the bike before I could completely enjoy the thrill. I could kiss the ground right now.
Ripping the helmet off exposing my mess of hair, I shove the helmet in Harry’s abdomen. “You’re gonna need this more than me.”
Stepping back my knees wobble from the transfiguration of the bike to the ground and I almost go plummeting. Looking back at Harry I have never seen anyone smile so big.
“I was going the speed limit.” No he definitely wasn’t. Running my fingers through my hair I try and tame the mess.
“Next time will go slow.” next time? “Hell no.” the words rush off my tongue.
“Just admit it, that was fun.” staying silent I just stare back at Harry with my eyebrows pulled. “Your silence speaks for itself.” Harry whispers with a childish tone.
Okay so that was a little bit of fun. I repeat a little. “Gonna have to get you a proper helmet.” he places it on the handlebars after studying it.
“yeah bedazzled it while you’re at it Harry.” placing a hand on the wall in front of me I lean against it for support catching my breath.
Harry gets off his motorcycle and grabs his keys, shoving them in his pocket. “What are you doing?”
“Walking you up to your apartment. It’s three a.m, creeps are everywhere.” The only person In my radius right now is Harry but I swallow the remark, I’ll save the joke for another day.
“Well come one then.” I hurry Harry over with my hands and start walking up to two glass doors. Opening them both, I enter following Harry behind me. swallowing back my anxiety of Harry walking through my apartment building right now I try to remember what he said.
I mean It’s not like he’ll be coming in or anything.
Making our way to the elevator we step inside and I click floor three. When the doors close Harry leans against the elevator wall closing his arms, looking back at me with a mysterious grin. “Admit you had fun.” he cous idiotly from the side. He’s really not gonna leave this alone.
Turning around to face him in the humongous sweater I’m in, I fold my arms in front of me matching his smirky expression. “It was a little fun.” emphasize on the little.
“A Lot of fun.” he adds an extra tone on the lot. shaking my head I zip my lips with an imaginary key throwing it to him.
Harry steps forward walking up to me, trapping me with his arms in this elevator locking me in. Looking up at him in curiosity His hand pushes into my abdomen that has me laughing on the spot. Shrieking out I let out a playful scream I fall over into Harry’s hold.
Assholes tickling me.
“Okay, okay, I plead the fifth.” I continuously laugh. Harry stops and I immediately catch my breath from laughing so hard. standing up straight against the wall I just admit, “It was fun.” My tone loud from excitement.
I literally can see his ego growing through his eyes.
The elevator bings and we both step out. My doors in the middle so once we reach it I turn to face him. “Thanks for the ride tonight Harry.” I honestly tell him nicely.
“No problem darling.” His expression soft. Grabbing my keys from my bag Harry still remains standing there. Okay then.
My door clicks and I open it a crack slipping inside. Turning around blocking the inside I press my body at the door. Harry stands in front of me but leaves space so I know he doesn’t want to come in. “Do you work tomorrow?” Harry chimes through the silence.
“No. have a day off sadly. Just gonna be in here all day.” I wonder why he’s asking me this but all I get in response is a wide lipped grin.
“Goodnight Violet.” Watching as Harry turns around making his way for the elevator he has a pep to his step.
Oh Shit i’m still wearing his sweater.
“Wait Harry.” he turns around sharply. “Your sweater let me take it off-”
“No need.” Harry steps into the elevator clicking a button. “It looks much better on you.” winking is the last thing I see before the elevator doors shut.
Backing away from my own door I shut it and place myself against it. sliding down to the floor my butt jumps from the col touch. Sitting there for what seems like hours, wrapped in his huge sweater with a breaking point of comfort, I start to think.
I have never revealed so much to someone in such little detail in my life. I was so open and told him a sliver of what I had been living my life, in fear pushing inside. Why was it different with him? Why do I feel so open explaining my life to him?
It’s a terrifying feeling really. That someone knows so much but so little. I would be sick if I didn’t feel at such comfort with Harry. It’s at times like this where I need the stars but there’s nowhere I can go. My mind grows in endless possibilities of what might happen with Harry and I hope he keeps his promise.
For the first time today I made a promise and that feeling alone makes me terrified. Swallowing fear and lies, I close my eyes as blackness takes over.